deceptionst

[deceptionst]

[deceptionst]

being a cry baby is actually v problematic

[deceptionst]

[record scratch]

[freeze frame]

Yup, that’s me. You’re probably wondering how I ended up in this situation.

[deceptionst]

Cute gender neutral names to call your partner

homosexual

woman with children

short insomniac

teeny tiny band

father with children

fancy family

woman internist

kosher caterer

ex-ex lover

psycho-analyst

child insomniac

liberal democrat

spiky lesbian

hypochondriac

Yiddish american

crazy family

radiologist

intellectual

nervous wreck!

*sigh*

#talia

[deceptionst]

What the signs want for Christmas

Aries: falsettos bootleg Pisces: falsettos bootleg Aquarius: falsettos bootleg Taurus: falsettos bootleg Gemini: falsettos bootleg Leo: falsettos bootleg Cancer: falsettos bootleg Capricorn: falsettos bootleg Virgo: falsettos bootleg Libra: falsettos bootleg Scorpio: falsettos bootleg Sagittarius: falsettos bootleg

#pls

[deceptionst]

meanwhile on Ellen…

[deceptionst]

Someone: Watch this show

Me: No. I don't have time and it doesn't look that interes-

Someone: It's gay

Me: sign me the FUCK up 👌👀👌👀👌👀👌👀👌👀 good shit go౦ԁ sHit👌 thats ✔ some good👌👌shit right👌👌th 👌 ere👌👌👌 right✔there ✔✔if i do ƽaү so my selｆ 💯 i say so 💯 thats what im talking about right there right there (chorus: ʳᶦᵍʰᵗ ᵗʰᵉʳᵉ) mMMMMᎷМ💯 👌👌 👌НO0ОଠＯOOＯOОଠଠOoooᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒ👌 👌👌 👌 💯 👌 👀 👀 👀 👌👌Good shit

#the 100

[deceptionst]

friend: you look stressed me: haha yeah it’s the stress

[deceptionst]

It’s ironic.

When I worked in fast food for minimum wage, they would yell at us and lecture us about “stealing” fries and burgers (while we had to throw out TONS of food every day) as though the giant billion-dollar corporations of McDonald’s and Sonic couldn’t afford to give their employees something to eat (while not even paying us a living wage).

Now I work at an upscale restaurant (it’s fancy, like celebrities eat there fairly often) and not only do I make WAY better money but they give us 2 free meals a day (eaten on the clock) and they’re GOOD. Today I got baked cod, spring rolls, rice pilaf, stir fry, and mashed potatoes and eggplant. Oh, and free espresso and juice. From this restaurant owned by a local man who is in no way a billionaire.

Obviously money is not the issue, valuing your employees as people is.

[deceptionst]

[deceptionst]

Everyone needs to wash their face n go to bed

[deceptionst]

Please leave picky eaters alone. I hate having the diet of a five year old. I don't choose to starve myself regularly. It's very brave of some of us to even eat in public because of our food choices. So don't say anything, please.

#picky eaters

[deceptionst]

just a friendly reminder that if you know someone who is a picky eater please don’t tease them about their eating choices because 95% of the time its because of fear and anxiety and it makes us really uncomfortable when you joke about our strange diets okay thanks

#it's v embarrassing #pls understand that we would change if we could

[deceptionst]

#delaina #you as a mom

[deceptionst]

[deceptionst]

don’t look at me in that tone of voice

#talia #me every time you do anything remotely rebellious

[deceptionst]

Freedom Writers (2007)