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Roger Ebert just destroying some specific kind of nerd(s). 

#jesus fucking christ I just woke up this morning I didn't ask to be torn a new asshole like this fucking hell

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the fruitiest people to ever touch the stars .... 🖖

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Reblogging would be a great help, but don’t feel pressured to

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The two twins…

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its important to do this every time a museum or school thinks this is a good idea

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U.S. conservatives always talk about creating jobs but get SO MAD whenever anyone mentions banning prison labor like imagine the insane ammout of jobs that would be created literally overnight if companies in your country had to actually employ people instead of using slave labor from people that got caught with weed 10 years ago.

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decomposition

lenticular riso prints!

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before the poll, a quick definition of terms:

"mutual" - you found this post from a mutual (on their blog or your dash) "following" - you found this post from someone you're following, but who isn't following you "random" - you found this by scrolling through someone's blog, who you don't follow. this includes people following you "For You" - you found this on the For You page "recommended" - you found this in a "Check out these blogs" popup, or a "recommended" post when looking at a different post "other" - you found this post some other way. comment how? "reblog ✅" - you're going to reblog, queue, or schedule this post "reblog ❌" - you're NOT going to reblog, queue, or schedule this post

with that out of the way:

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The Boys in DUNE AU

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Is he a scary man covered in blood? Or is he my baby girl? Spot the difference

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Spones fake romance subplots that make me want to write normal star trek episode scripts (can you imagine?),

Spock is required to battle some alien thing, and spend the night beforehand alone under alien observation. He was injured so Kirk is desperate for McCoy to get access to him. Kirk finds out that spouses are the exception and insists that Spock and McCoy are married. They have to act married with absolutely no chance to set boundaries or communicate what they're doing beyond a hasty whisper

On some planet and they do something together that the culture accept as a proposal (walking through an archway, getting excited about the same xenobiology thing, whatev) and no matter what Spock and McCoy say the aliens believe they're newly engaged and insist on throwing a party in their honour. Kirk tells them to play along please, they're so excited and it's making things easier. Also it's hilarious.

They need to travel through alien space that requires all people in their space be married (cultural thing about single people being half a person, not able to hold a job). Spock and McCoy team up cos neither of them want to, but at least the Vulcan privacy customs will mean they don't have to PDA. Unfortunately, they keep having to attend diplomatic dinners and Kirk insists they at least compliment each other occasionally, ffs

The enterprise is in trouble for some fuckery and everyone is on their best behaviour. Spock and McCoy get caught fighting somewhere inappropriate within starfleet because they weren't paying attention to where they were walking. While getting a dressing down Spock knows the admiral telling them off is a romantic so he says that he and McCoy were kissing. McCoy, head in hands, cannot disagree or it'll make things worse. "Yep, we were making out." So they have to play a couple from then. Kirk loves it. He involves it in their trial defence.

Classic hiding from the cops on some planet behaviour and in order to give themselves an alibi for being found in a cupboard they make out. They then have to, individually in their interrogation cells, try and guess what romantic backstory the other would be spinning and do their best to match it. They do a terrible job

They go to a conference together and get cheaper tickets by applying for the travel as a pair. They put themselves down as colleagues on everything, but when they get to the cruise they're in the honeymoon suite and an attendant politely advises them to play along or they'll be bumped to the next ship. McCoy finds a way to deeply enjoy every moment until things actually get a little bit romantic and then he's super uncomfortable. Spock appears unaffected (he's very affected).

McCoy starts addressing Spock by Vulcan pet names to be a shit stirrer and some diplomat overhears it and deduces that they're secretly dating. Lots of the diplomat finding ways to leave the two of them alone, but Spock and McCoy are none the wiser and just enjoy a squabble. Ep ends with the diplomat winking at them as they all stare blankly, before being transported away

Similar, but post Katra some Vulcan assumes that Spock and McCoy were married and asks all these questions about it over dinner, but doesn't outright say it so everyone's just answering the weird questions as honestly as they can. Nothing they say makes it clear that they aren't dating until like the end of the dinner. McCoy loses his shit about it

Spock is required to mindmeld with McCoy for some plot reason, the aliens they're with think it's awesome and are like!! Can you do that on everyone!!! So cool! So Spock is like, "nope, only McCoy. Because... We're... Married?" And McCoy will always support Spock in a consent thing, and mind melds are v invasive for him, but even so. They're only on the planet for the first like fifteen min, the rest is them on the ship with McCoy making endless fun of Spock over it

Someone is hitting on McCoy but he's not keen. Lets her down easy by saying he's seeing someone. Spock wanders by as this convo is wrapping up and due to convoluted shit pretends he's the someone. McCoy is grateful, but very annoyed about how it all worked out really. But when they have a fight the lady shoots her shot again so McCoy gets like romantic about it to keep the story alive

Actually hell yeah, what's your favourite?

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O K A Y

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you guys just dont even. understand Him. hes NOT super overly sweet and affectionate with his partner(s), although he does love them very much. he reluctantly accepts a kiss on the cheek from jim, melodramatically rolling his eyes and kicking him out of the sickbay. but he looks back at jim as he walks away, a soft smile on his face and an added pep in his step for the rest of his shift.

he grumbles about "ridiculous vulcan voodoo" and makes a face as spock offers him an ozh'esta. but when their fingers touch, spock can feel the overwhelming affection underneath his icy exterior; his armor protecting him from getting hurt again.

the armor isn't going to fall off the moment he falls in love. it may not ever fall off; not all the way, at least. spock and jim aren't there to "fix" him, they're there to love him as he is. he doesn't have to outwardly express his love to show that he loves. he loves and cares deeply, all he ever wants is for everyone around him to be safe and to feel better.

in this essay about leonard mccoy, i will be-

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Star Trek 1x29: Operation—Annihilate!, 1967

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Damn it, Jim. I’m a doctor.

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My favourite ship dynamic is, uh, gay scientists