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engravely‌:

“ get. the. fuck. out. of. my. house. ” seriously? seriously???? he’s mostly cool with this bastard breaking in until dazai says that and chuuya pauses. turns around. looks dazai’s way with a wide grin, before grabbing a kitchen knife and throwing it straight at his forehead like a real fucking dart. “ hurry up and kill yourself. i’ve been waiting. say another word and i’ll throw your phone off the balcony - pretty sure you’re too fucking broke to get a new one, too. good riddance. ” he pauses again, like he really thought of something amazing. ” the balcony…hey, wouldn’t that be a great way to finally end it? want a witness? ” 

     All of Chuuya’s threats fall on deaf ears. Dazai seems a little preoccupied. Not preoccupied enough to get stabbed in the forehead though and he cleanly dodges the projectile with little to no effort. Chuuya’s so predictable but there’s nothing bad about that! Oddly enough -- Dazai doesn’t think he’ll ever tire of Chuuya though he won’t ever be admitting that to him. “...throw my phone off the balcony? ...now that’s an idea! But you know -- you’re kind of right. I’m not the one who’s going to be buying a new phone. It’ll probably be Kunikida-kun -- and I am tired of this model. I want the new one.” He is definitely pouting at the end of that sentence. “Throwing myself of your balcony would have been a great idea but it’s not a guarantee, you know? I could be paralyzed for life! I want to die not suffer.”

#engravely #want a witness... no i want a partner.

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engravely‌:

you can be both.  yeah, i know all too well, asshole. how many times did you leave me hanging on the job? you’re lucky i didn’t kill you, but it’s only a matter of time, huh? who knows. 

o oh. good. Fantastic. keep it unsaved and never contact me again. also, quit being disgusting. i’m already queasy, that almost made me gag.

right, but i’m not soooooooooooo.

it’s not thaaaaaat bad. i always made it there in the end, didn’t i? you’re so hard to kill so i never really had to worry, you know? <3

if i didn’t know any better i’d almost say that you sounded hurt but that couldn’t be right...right? :o you’re all bark and no bite huh :D :D :D ;D

#engravely #KLJFD;LSKFJSD I LOVE CHUUYA AND WOULD DIE FOR HIM AAA

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engravely replied to your post: engravely replied to your post: ...

starter about this exactly

     Stares @ his phone that won’t stop buzzing before casually throwing into the some random corner of the room where it continues to vibrate with an almost annoying intensity. 

“...anyways...I can’t believe you don’t have ANY snacks. Actually, never mind. I can. That’s why your growth is so stunted.” Sad.

#engravely #ok done

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engravely replied to your post: engravely replied to your post STOP IT ...

SHUT UPPPPPPPPPPPPP BITCH FUCK U DAZAI REALLY SINGS IT LIKE HES A CHEATERHGRGHR

he quotes it at girls he picks up and then leaves them before he has anything and breaks into chuuya’s pLACOE JFSDLK;FJSDLKJFLKDSJF

#engravely #HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHKLSJFLSDJFSJ HIS PHONE IS BLOWING UP #CHUUYA: UR NOT GONNA GET THAT? #dazai: ^_^ why would i do that.

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engravely replied to your post

STOP IT

lets,,, fall in love for the night,,

and forget in the morning ,,,

play me a song that you like ,,,

i bet i know every line...

#engravely #I CAN'T STOPJF;DSLFJSD THIS IS SO FUNNY

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engravely‌:

you’re delusional…damn. i finally figured it out. i feel even worse for him now.

nah, you called me. i don’t know why you’re being annoying about it. just admit it.

oh, wrong person. i thought it was you. it was kouyou. my bad. anyways, delete my number you sick freak.

rude. i’m suicidal, not delusional. there is a difference, you know!

i’m actually offended that you don’t know this already but you of all people should know i never never never pick up calls! :P 

HAHAHAHAHHAHA HOWD YOU MIX UP ME AND KOUYOU??? nice one!!!! anyways what makes you think i have this number saved? you’re so presumptuous but i kind of like that in a guy!

#what if dazai goes XD could u imagine #engravely

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#me: listens to nobody and baby while making these ;O;

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engravely‌:

i feel bad for kunikida if this is the way you talk to him. and if only killing you were that easy. you called me. stop lying. you KNOW who this is. i have your address. i’ll send it to every girl whose heart you broke. don’t think i won’t, bastard.

there’s no need to feel bad for kunikida-kun! he loves when i talk like this to him (it means i’m talking back to him lololololololol)

O: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NO WAY there’s only ONE (1) person who has my address ... it can’t be ...

alright, alright! you’ve got me! so what do you want from me chuuuuuuuuuuuya? because i sure haven’t called you :/

#engravely #can drunk chuuya chill ha ha !

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engravely‌:

you know damn well who this is you roach. you’re the one that CALLED me. what the fuck do you want.

kunikida-kun, you’re being so mean!!!! ;A; ...............TT^TT my heart is breaking into pieces!! you know at this point, i think i might just die from the heart break lol

um anyways you know i don’t do calls...so try again! :)

#engravely #dazai avoids all calls if he doesnt know ur calling OJFKLDJS;LKFJDSLKFJ;SKDJFDS #must inform dazai three business days in advance that you will be calling him on a tuesday #at exactly 12 #or u Will miss him #ANYWAYS I LOVE CHUUYA >W<

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sms to: slug </3.

sorry????? who’s this again??????  kunikida-kun, is that you?? :DD

sms to: mackerel. hey. delete my number already you literally disgust me. @envoided​

#engravely #omg thank u for my first ever starter hehehehe

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>:3c

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*kill

will u **** me?

FUCK OFF ALREADY CANT I HAVE A SERIOUS BLOG FOR ONCE LKJAHLKHKHAKJALKJSJ FUCK YOU BITCH

#OJFDLSKFJLDSKJFLKSD;JFLKDJSL;KFJ