femmchantress

[femmchantress]

yall ever heard about dudes with fat boobies and wide hips. sound of the summer

[femmchantress]

it's not enough that you like and reblog my posts, I need you bouncing and moaning on it

[femmchantress]

[femmchantress]

Did you know that nerdy boys have glasses so that they can fog up from huffing while they suck your dick? You can Google it, it’s true.

[femmchantress]

[femmchantress]

I’m sorry what are the fucking odds that Guitar Wolf comes to New Orleans and is playing the exact same hours as the fucking MH3 pre-release that we all already signed up and paid for

[femmchantress]

there should be a month that starts with R

[femmchantress]

I think I too could develop a better handle on my mental illnesses if they were a babadook Norman Reedus that I had tentacle sex with

[femmchantress]

Stainless steel stirrup collar

With removable rubber pad for cleaning

#oh

[femmchantress]

@harley-gayvidson and I have been singing Orville Peck in the car a lot as of late and we’ve both been very like “oh wow cutesy and emotional little love songs sure kick ass when they’re gay”

[femmchantress]

SO RACK EM UP, BIG BLOOOOOONDE

I THINK I COULDVE BEEN YOUR MAAAAAAAN

[femmchantress]

i once drove ten hours in a row but i didn't drive ten hours straight if you know what i mean

#I adore this

[femmchantress]

*saw voice* ok so theres not actually a bomb in there i just thought you would look cute with a collar on

[femmchantress]

who up thrashin with they wumpus

#*abba voice* Whoooo uppppp thrashin with they wumpuuuuuus? laaaaay all your wuuuump on meeeee

[femmchantress]

these are actual diagnoses from my dr appt today

#first two are me

[femmchantress]

Y’all hear what they did to John Barleycorn…

[femmchantress]

Doing my best to feel good about myself today

#o hey that’s me