glimpseofwonderarchive

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"It's not like that." Lila protested, before sighing heavily and bowing her head in defeat. She let him take her hand, but her own grip was all but nonexistent.

When he put it like that, it made her sound so selfish. So unreasonable. She never wanted to be the only one he ever loved. That was an absurd idea! Everyone had their pasts! It would be exceedingly hypocritical, given her own past with Owen and Cecily. She didn't care that he'd loved Jenny, Claire, or John.

It wasn't even so much that he had loved Piera... It was more the confusion she felt within herself. Was she Piera Marie Garner, or was she Delilah Noelle Whitman? Which did he see? Which did he care for?

All her life, she never could have imagined that finally having the answers she'd so desperately sought would just make things harder.

"I don't want to erase your past." She continued in a hushed, sheepish whisper. "I don't care that you were in love before. I would never ask to change or erase that. I'm not heartless. But... But you've always been you. And you've always been so sure of yourself. But I don't have that luxury, Malcolm. Not anymore. All my life, I've lived with these flashes that I could never place. Memories that were, and weren't, mine. I used to be so sure, even with all the questions. But now, I have no idea. I don't know who I am anymore. And part of me wishes I'd never remembered Piera at all. Maybe then I wouldn't like my identity is lost somewhere between the past and the present. You've got to understand that. How do you think I feel, knowing that I'm simultaneously your wife and not? Nothing makes sense any more."

glimpseofwonder​ / Lila

Swallowing thickly and raking her hair from her eyes, Lila struggled to catch her breath. This was exactly what she’d wanted to avoid. Ever since she’d found out the truth, she had fought so hard to suppress and bury it.

She didn’t even know how her control had lapsed and brought all this secrecy to light.

“Malcolm, I…” She stammered through her tears.

She couldn’t even deny his words. How many nights had she laid awake, replaying the memories that came back. How many times had she watched him sleep, his chest rising and falling, sobbing silently because of the torture her mind subjected her to?

Yes, Lila had believed it wasn’t her he wanted. She believed to her very soul that it was only a second chance with who she’d once been that kept him around. Even now, could she really believe that it was really her he wanted? A life, a family, of their own, completely uninfluenced by what happened in World War II?

“Malcolm, put yourself in my place.” She begged, trying to make him understand, grasping at her stomach. “What would you believe if our places were reversed?”

Malcolm shook his head as he took some steps back. He needed some space to think about this. The Scot shook his head. “ I cannae put myself in yer steid. I’ve lived too long of a life to imagine myself in a position where different cards had been dealt to me. This is my life, this is my life, forever. I’ve lived too long to keep thinking, ‘oh what if things had been different ? ’ ” 

Asking questions like that, he wouldn’t have been able to get anything done. There were to many what-if scenarios for him to relive.  “  I did love Piera. Just as I had loved John before her, and thought I had loved Laoghaire, ‘n’ I had loved Claire before thaim.  And a pairt of my heart wull aye love Piera, alang wi’ John, 'n’ Claire, and even Jenny. But just because I loved thaim, does not mean that my love for you isnae real or valid. 'N’ loving you doesn’t remove thaim from my story, from my life. But I want to spend my life wi’ you, because I fell in love wi’ you. I want to have many wee bairns wi’ ye because I cuid nae imagine spending my eternity wi’ anyone else. I loved Piera, yes, but I widnae change the past, I widnae ! Nae if that meant I never got to meet ye, or love ye. ”

Malcolm turned back to her, taking steps closer to her, reaching for her hand, to take in his own. “ I’m wi’ ye fur every scar oan yer skin, that tis own work o’ art. For every smile oan yer coupon whin ye blether aboot yer wirk. For every roar ye mak’ whin we watch movies wi’ Faith. I’m wi’ ye for every bonny 'n’ hackit moment, for I hae ne'er loved someone sae wholly as I have loved you. I hae loved many fowk before ye, 'n’ I wid nae remove thaim fae mystory, but I wid nae go back tae thaim if given th’ chance, I wid nae chaynge my history, for I ken noo, I ken that yer th’ loue o’ mah life. ” He didn’t know how else to convince her, that she was not a second chance with a lost love, but that she was the only option for his eternity.  “  Thare is na yin else bit ye.”

#Threads {Lila} #V; Bring You Back From A Distant Lullaby #Malcolm #amantesmultorum

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#Relations {Arianllyn; Adaon} #Relations {Dominic; Ella} #Relations {Dominic; Danielle} #Relations {Éanon; Níarí} #Relations {Éanon; Mary} #Relations {Edward; Camila} #Relations {Edward; Aurora} #Relations {Edward; Christine} #Relations {Edward; Rapunzel} #Relations {Edward; Belle} #Relations {Eiluned; Elyan} #Relations {Raylen; Ella} #Relations {Raylen; Miranda} #Relations {Róisín; Ciarnan} #Relations {Lila; Malcolm}

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#Relations {Arianllyn; Adaon} #Relations {Dominic; Ella} #Relations {Dominic; Danielle} #Relations {Éanon; Níarí} #Relations {Éanon; Mary} #Relations {Edward; Camila} #Relations {Edward; Aurora} #Relations {Edward; Christine} #Relations {Edward; Rapunzel} #Relations {Edward; Belle} #Relations {Eiluned; Elyan} #Relations {Raylen; Ella} #Relations {Raylen; Miranda} #Relations {Róisín; Ciarnan} #Relations {Lila; Malcolm}

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“I went out to the hazel wood, Because a fire was in my head, And cut and peeled a hazel wand, And hooked a berry to a thread; And when white moths were on the wing, And moth-like stars were flickering out, I dropped the berry in a stream And caught a little silver trout. When I had laid it on the floor I went to blow the fire a-flame, But something rustled on the floor, And someone called me by my name: It had become a glimmering girl With apple blossom in her hair Who called me by my name and ran And faded through the brightening air. Though I am old with wandering Through hollow lands and hilly lands, I will find out where she has gone, And kiss her lips and take her hands; And walk among long dappled grass, And pluck till time and times are done, The silver apples of the moon, The golden apples of the sun.”

— The Song of Wandering Aengus ~ William Butler Yeats (via brigantias-isles)

#Quotes {Arianllyn} #Likes {Arianllyn} #Quotes {Éanon} #Likes {Éanon} #Quotes {Eiluned} #Likes {Eiluned} #Quotes {Róisín} #Likes {Róisín}

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Wheat

#Headcanons {Arianllyn} #Likes {Arianllyn} #Locales {Arianllyn; Prydain} #Locales {Arianllyn; Cantrev Cadiffor} #Relations {Arianllyn; Papa} #Relations {Arianllyn; Smoit} #Relations {Arianllyn; Goryon & Gast}

[glimpseofwonderarchive]

Edward didn't answer right away. Instead, he glanced wistfully around the garden and let the plethora of memories take hold. He could still hear his mother's laughter on the breeze. See her ghost hanging up the laundry and helping Ella, Flora, and Helen to gather the combs from the beehives. And, if he tried, he could almost smell the smoke from his father's pipes wafting out from the windows.

All those sweet, innocent summer days that he, Briar, and Ella had danced in the meadow amongst the sheep! How the girls had gathered flowers and woven them all crowns. Things were so much simpler then, when the world couldn't touch them and everything was possible...

"You must think me foolish." He finally sighed, though he didn't meet her gaze. "A grown man, stuck in the past, unable to let go. Everywhere I look here, there's so many memories. Mother is gone, Father is gone. Ella's soon to be gone, and then we will be too. This place, once so full of life and laughter, will be nothing but ghosts and silence..."

glimpseofwonder·:

While Aurora and her cousin whispered together, Edward swallowed thickly. He didn’t want to approach his sister, only to lose his composure. It would only make things harder for them both if she left having seen his tears.

But before he could take more than a few steps toward his sister, Aurora’s voice and touch were drawing him back. Looking between her and his sister, Edward bit his lip. Finally, his shoulders dropping ever so slightly, he nodded.

Offering Aurora his arm, he led her out to the garden.

Aurora took his arm and walked outside with him to the familiar garden. The three of them had many fond memories in this garden; they played frequently together here. But now they were all grown up and moving onto better things. 

She walked quietly with him until they were far enough away from the cottage and she stopped, turning to him and gently resting a hand on his cheek. 

“Oh, my darling,” she said softly, her eyes showing concern and understanding. “Talk to me, please. Tell me everything that is on your mind and I will do my best to comfort you.” 

#Threads {Edward} #V; Longs To Be Flying #V; My Light & My Guide #Aurora #dreamcrs

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#Headcanons {Raylen} #Likes {Raylen} #Relations {Raylen; Mam & Giacomo} #Relations {Raylen; Giorgia & Bianca} #Locales {Raylen; Italy}

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source

#Headcanons {Arianllyn} #Likes {Arianllyn} #Locales {Arianllyn; Prydain} #Locales {Arianllyn; Cantrev Cadiffor} #Relations {Arianllyn; Papa} #Relations {Arianllyn; Smoit} #Relations {Arianllyn; Goryon & Gast}

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#Locales {Dominic; Sark} #Headcanons {Dominic} #Likes {Dominic} #Locales {Edward; Sark} #Locales {Edward; Houmetnez} #Locales {Edward; Estate} #Headcanons {Edward} #Likes {Edward}

[glimpseofwonderarchive]

Groaning softly, eyes blinking the sleep away, Edward wasn't quite sure where he was for a second. And, for the fleetest of moments, the dark haired figure over him almost had him convinced he was back at his father's estate, his sister giggling as she roused him from slumber.

But in a suffocating instant, the idea, the hope, was gone. Just like Ella... He wasn't at the estate. He was at the castle. His castle...

Groggily, and now grief stricken, the king sat up and stretched. His neck cracked from the position he'd angled it at. And he looked around ashamed.

"I'm sorry, Belle." He murmured. "I've gone and fallen asleep after I promised you a picnic! I feel absolutely dreadful for it... I don't know how Ki... How... How Kit did it."

How was it that even after all this time, he still couldn't say their names without wanting to die himself? It had been 6 months! Everyone expected him to be over it by now. Typical. Yet another way to show he was a failure at this...

"He, he made it look so easy. He never doubted, never foundered. And he never failed my sister. But this endless barrage of meetings and treaties... Even if I could sleep, I wouldn't be able to handle it. I think he was wrong, naming me his heir..."

“your majesty,     ”      words are barely above a whisper, lost in the soft summer wind before they reach his sleeping ears.      he looks so peaceful sitting underneath the tree it felt sacrilegious to try to rouse him      —      he had fallen asleep almost as soon as they sat down, body practically collapsing against the rough tree bark.     

when he had appeared before her quarters to collect her, she had inquired if he would not prefer to meet her another day, but her gentle offer had fallen on deaf ears, edward insisting he was looking forward to their picnic;    personally, she thought he had been feeling guilty, having to reschedule it three times already, matters of state keeping him busy.     she had allowed him to rest for as long as possible, but the sun was beginning its slow descent west, and this was probably not the last item on his agenda today.      

“     your majesty,     ”     she repeats without much success.    snapping closed the book on her lap with a sigh, she waits another moment, seeing if the sound roused him, before moving closer.   there are no guards in the immediate surroundings, no gossiping tongues to later recall how lady belle had brushed the king’s hair out of his forehead, murmuring his title until his eyes fluttered open.     “      good morning.     ”     

@glimpseofwonder​   plotted starter !

#Threads {Edward} #V; Until You're Home Again #V; Everything In My World #Death Tw #Death Trigger Warning #Grief Tw #Grief Trigger Warning #Belle #mcrtals

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Fairy tail by Iwata You

#Locales {Róisín; Tír na nÓg} #Headcanons {Róisín} #Likes {Róisín}

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#Fc {Arianllyn} #Headcanons {Arianllyn} #Likes {Arianllyn} #Locales {Arianllyn; Prydain} #Locales {Arianllyn; Cantrev Cadiffor} #Locales {Arianllyn; Caer Dathyl} #Locales {Arianllyn; Summer Country}

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@luukk  

#Wardrobe {Róisín} #Likes {Róisín} #Locales {Róisín; Tír na nÓg}

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Sasha Pivovarova in “Enchanted Gardens” by Paolo Roversi for Vogue India October 2007

#Fc {Róisín} #Wardrobe {Róisín} #Likes {Róisín} #Headcanons {Róisín} #Locales {Róisín; Tír na nÓg}

[glimpseofwonderarchive]

Squeezing her hand gently, Edward locked his eyes on her face and listened to her story intently. And what a story it was! Many questions formed in his mind, but he listened without interruption.

He'd heard of the Chagnys, of course. Father liked their champagne, and, if the records of the shop were right, he'd once done business with the old man. Or was it the oldest son? Edward couldn't quite remember. But he knew for a fact that he'd have to have met Raoul at least once in those trips. His mind's eye seemed to call up the image of a shy boy with blue eyes and blond hair...

What a strange coincidence! But, then again, maybe it was fate. Maybe Raoul's spirit had intervened to bring her here, where she'd be safe and taken care of.

And this Erik! He sounded even more vile than his stepmother! At least she'd been upfront with him and Ella. She made her dislike and her intentions known. But this? This was demented. It was incomprehensible! How could someone manipulate, stalk, and torment a girl like this? What was the point? What did he get from it? Edward wasn't a violent man, but for this piece of trash, he'd be willing to make an exception. Someone had to put him in his place, and let him know that he wouldn't stand for his actions.

Laying his hand gently over Christine's where it rested on his cheek, the young man sighed deeply. What a little group they made! Three orphans, alone in the world, facing unimaginable hardships and suffering at the hands of others.

"Christine..." Edward hesitated, unsure if he should tell her. "I think I may have known him. Raoul. My father ran an antique shop here. And he trained me to take over it. We traveled all over the world getting stock for the shop. We went to France a lot. And I remember the Chagnys. I... I can't say I remember with any real clarity, nor that we were friends. But... But maybe you came here because it was where you belong. Maybe Raoul brought you here, maybe he brought you to us so we could look after you... If that's the case, I don't think he'd want you to feel guilty. I know it's easier said than done. But thinking like that would make it easier for me."

glimpseofwonder​ / Edward :

Her words were like a dagger to his heart; sharp, cuts leaving him bleeding. But Edward fought to hold it back. He couldn’t let it show. Not when he had these two wonderful young women looking up to him for strength and guidance, counting on him for safety. Not when he knew it wasn’t personal. Christine was suffering, greatly so. And she didn’t mean to wound, just explain and get support.

Still…. Like often, Edward was reminded of Belle’s words the one time she’d caught him weeping in the orchard. ‘You care so much for others,’ she’d told him. ‘Carry their burdens and fears. You do everything to look out for others, Edward, but who looks after you?’

He’d never told his sister’s best friend just how much those words hurt. How the realization that she was right was worse than almost everything else. He��d been forced to adulthood far too soon, and had to become a man, a parent, when he himself had needed a parent most… He didn’t say, but he knew that Belle had known.

Biting down hard on his lip, Edward turned away from her gaze. Would it be wrong to relate his own story? Would it diminish Christine’s pain, or would it validate it?

“My mother died when I was 12, Ovarian cancer. Ella was only 8, she was too young to really understand, and we did all we could to shelter her. She knew Mama was sick, but not how bad. It was practically too late when we found out, and she died not too long after getting diagnosed. My father had to do everything he could to try and help her, so I was looking after Ella a lot.” He explained slowly.

“When she died, she made me promise to take care of my sister. To do whatever it took to protect her and keep her safe and happy. Or father wasn’t the same after. He was still here, but at the same time, he wasn’t. He stopped working, he never smiled again. Not his real smile. So I had to take care of him too. Things got a little better over the years. He went back to work and talked a little more, tried to smile. Then… When we were 15 and 11… He married her. Debts he had to pay, a lifestyle he felt he had to keep them at. We told him to stop. I told him he had to put his foot down. Ella told him he had to look after himself.”

Edward shook his head, an almost bitter look filling his face. “He didn’t listen. It felt like he was choosing them over us. Like he cared for them more. He never saw how they were, or what they did. And when I tried to tell him, he didn’t believe me. He died a year later. Worked himself to death. I wouldn’t be surprised if she had a hand in it. And you’ve seen how it’s been for us since. Nearly 12 years… I’ve practically been my sister’s father for nearly half my life… Everything I do, I do for her. And I can’t let her see. Heh, I’ve never told this to anyone…”

He swallowed thickly and wiped at his eyes. “I don’t blame Ella. Never. Someone’s got to do it, and I’m glad to step up for her. But I… I can’t help resenting that I had to. How it’s all broken us both. Ella can cry. She can get it out. But I can’t. I have to be strong. I have to stand up for and defend her. I lost track of how many times I’ve taken the brunt of their shit to protect her. But why did I have to? Why couldn’t my father have protected us? Why couldn’t my mother have lived?”

Glancing up at her, he gave a small, teary, ghost of a smile. “We’re all broken, Christine. Some of us more than others. Let me tell you, I haven’t felt like I belonged somewhere in years. And I wish I could say it gets easier. But it hasn’t yet for me. If it weren’t for Ella, I don’t know where or what I’d be right now… I wish I had some magic words to say that would make all your pain go away. But I can only tell you the truth I’ve experienced. And the pain, the anger, it still festers. It still threatens to drag me under. But I see her smile, or hear her laugh, and sometimes, it feels almost worth it. Even feeling like a failure because I can’t protect her and knowing that I let down my mother. My life has revolved around Ella for so long, I probably rely on her more than I should. But between her and you, I found a reason to go on. To try. And you have to find a reason. No matter what it is, or how small, you need to find it. Or else, all this pain and regret will destroy you. And that’s not somewhere you want to go.”

Christine didn’t know how to respond at first when he mentioned his mother. Perhaps she hadn’t expected the honesty, or that he would open up to her. Perhaps she was just impressed that he had such courage to tell her all that, when she had found it so hard to open up to him and Ella, even after all they have done for her these past few weeks. Perhaps she just need someone else to vulnerable in order for her to truly open up to him.

Christine allowed a few tears to fall down her check, before taking Edwards hand in her own, deciding that if he could do such a kindness to show her how he was broken, so could tell her story too.

Keep reading

#Threads {Edward} #V; A World Without Music #Christine #amantesmultorum #Cancer Cw #Death Cw #Abuse Cw #Stalking Cw #Murder Cw

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#Wardrobe {Róisín} #Headcanons {Róisín} #Likes {Róisín} #Locales {Róisín; Tír na nÓg} #Relations {Róisín; The Fae} #Wardrobe {Muirinn} #Likes {Muirinn} #Headcanons {Muirinn}

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#Wardrobe {Róisín} #Relations {Róisín; The Fae} #Locales {Róisín; Tír na nÓg} #Headcanons {Róisín} #Likes {Róisín} #Relations {Yesenia; Dryads} #Likes {Yesenia} #Headcanons {Yesenia} #Locales {Yesenia; Narnia} #Wardrobe {Yesenia}