heinz-peenz

[heinz-peenz]

Turns out I’m lighter than I thought. Hadn’t weighed myself for months and assumed I was 145 at the best, turns out I’m 135?

Lets not jinx it lol

[heinz-peenz]

Need to stop smoking weed and stick with amphetamines, munchies got me EATING eating

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Got a partner now. You know what time it is

Wish I actually had a partner so I'd have that extra motive to lose weight...but have to lose weight if I want to attract a partner 😭😭 for gods sake

[heinz-peenz]

I’m about 145-150 right now (don’t have a scale so I’m just assuming). Relapsing because I need more control. I’m not extravagant looking so some weight loss might do me some good. Just want my girlfriend to be worried about me and stop belittling my feelings.

Going to eat only once every couple days. Lots of mild weighted exercise, not loads of HIIT because that’ll melt my muscle but keep fat (learnt that from last time). I don’t care what I eat, as long as it’s mostly protein.

Bound to lose 25lbs in the next three months. Lost it in two last year but I’m being patient with myself as I’ve got exams coming up. Aiming for that skinny perfectionist type beat.

Welp, here goes; First 24 hr fast in many many months. Eat. Another 24 hr fast. Eat. Etcetera.

I’m going to hate this but I don’t care to be honest

[heinz-peenz]

[heinz-peenz]

Gorbeia eta Aldamin

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2 months later update: I got a girlfriend and I got inspired to recover so I could be better for her. It worked! However, now im fat again and I need to shape myself up + definitely lose some.

I’m currently taking a hiatus and I’m not sure when I’ll be back. I’ve approached an inner conflict which I need time to figure out, so peace

[heinz-peenz]

I’m currently taking a hiatus and I’m not sure when I’ll be back. I’ve approached an inner conflict which I need time to figure out, so peace

#it’s not as dramatic as it sounds #I just need to distance myself from toxic shid atm

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Currently doing this diet if anyone wants to join :P

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Been prescribed new antidepressants, this time they’re the lessened-appetite weight loss kind WOOHOO

The downside was that my doctor told my mum about my attempts which she did not know about uh but other than that I’m on cloud 9 babey!

#She looks heartbroken #I feel so guilty

[heinz-peenz]

Do annah-coaches still exist? (I mean the genuine ones, not the creepy ones) because to me they have sort of died out over the recent years - unless they're just hiding in plain sight lol?

Anyway if one sees this, do know that I am looking for one, same goes for buddies too

#4n0r3x14 #4na blog #ana trigger #ed diet #pr0 ana diary

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Another really obvious reason I’m diving straight back into restricting is because having a plate of next to nothing is no where NEAR as embarrassing as a plate that looks like this:

I took this picture a couple months ago when I was addicted to binge eating. This was a plate I had for breakfast. BREAKFAST. Never again.

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#not mine

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about to break my own heart remembering all the ways i let myself get hurt yeehaw pardner

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I think maybe if I can recover, anyone can. This shit is the hardest thing I've ever had to do (and it's had some fierce competition for that spot too) but I think I might finally make it out this time.

#I think everyone should see this #captures everything perfectly

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My attraction to strong, reliable and independent women either means I am an incompetent man child or have mother issues or both (it’s both)

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When someone is so outrageously incorrect about a very obvious thing that it triggers homocidal urges

#I’m not talking about a maths problem #I’m talking about people with 0 empathy thinking they know people #when they don’t