College friendship is sending one of your friends who's graduating soon a giant list of monster theory and gothic horror academic reading recs so they can download as many PDFs as possible before they lose their university database access
you're going about your normal day when, suddenly, surprise! you've been pokémon mystery dungeon'd!
unfortunately, due to budget cuts, the pokémon assigning quiz has been canceled. instead, you must spin THE WHEEL, assigning you a random, unevolved, non-legendary and non-mythical pokémon. you must now go on some sort of world-saving adventure as this pokémon. good luck!
tell me in the tags what you rolled, and how you feel about it - for bonus points, you can spin the wheel again for (or just take your pick of) a pokémon to be your partner.
bonus rules:
you're not shiny unless the wheel tells you you're shiny
take your pick of regional forms and evolutions (for example, if you roll vulpix, it's up to you whether that means normal or alolan vulpix)
apply whatever logic you like with regards to gender
the fan interpretation of falin touden—that is, as big, broad, transgender, and hot—may singlehandedly have the power to convince a whole generation of transfem people that being skinny and slender is not actually mandatory
apparently one whale years ago was observed doing this for hours and now more and more whales in the area are seen copying it so we think it’s a whole new behavior and it seems to be a response to shrinking food sources.
Instead of expending any energy actively hunting, the whale just holds its mouth open wherever fish are being hunted by birds. To escape the birds, the fish try to hide in the whale’s mouth because it’s a darker area that looks like shelter.
…They’re turning into giant, sea-mammal pitcher plants.