jam-every-other-day

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Dark side of the loom

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I've been scream laughing at this for several days

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And after endless engineering calculations the result is achieved.

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I think my favorite scene in FMAB is Ed’s post-impalement comeback where he takes out like five soldiers while eating from a big bag of groceries

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“…the sight of Elon Musk charging towards Wikipedia with his trademark guile and delicacy was so predictable that it was almost relaxing. He saw a collective resource that people prized and he wanted to hurt it.”

Thoth knows Wikipedia’s not perfect, but I’d sooner have it handy than not have it.

#literally just donated to Wikipedia #fuck elon musk

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So I love all of FMA’s “it’s clever when it’s not in English” naming. Riza “The Hawk’s Eye” Hawkeye. The Strong Arm Alchemist, Alexander Louis Armstrong. Ruler of the nation, King Bradley–first name King, last name Bradley.

And you know, that “King Bradley” name is a strong contender for most ridiculous in-your-face naming but that’s not actually the worst of Bradley’s name. What’s worse is that he’s “Fuhrer President King Bradley”, because he’s literally got three titles in his name that all mean “Ruler” literally three of them but even that is not the worst part about Fuhrer President King Bradley’s name.

You see the worst part about this name is that he goes by “Fuhrer”. You know, the German word for “Leader”, pronounced “fyur-ur”, same as “Furor”.

You know, Furor

Or,

you know,

in other words

Wrath.

#i literally thought his title was Fuhrer King #i didn't know his first name was literally King thats so fucking funny

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Hey guess what bitches Poland had a general election last Sunday and we said "fuck you" to the current fascist Orban-wannabes en masse, in a record-breaking historic turnout of 74% (that's a better turnout than the 1989 election which toppled the Soviet regime), with people of all ages standing in lines till 3 am to vote, young people actually outnumbering the elderly for the first time ever; and the result is that the progressive pro-EU coalition won and will form the next government. Been in in a stunned-but-celebratory mood since Sunday night.

It can be done.

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Fellas

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I call this one “cartoon mentors who went hard af from tv shows that disney didn’t deserve”

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anybody else going through life feeling like a dog that wasn't socialized enough as a puppy

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#i only had three! #got them all removed when I was 17

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We need to appreciate Elle Woods's friends more. When they thought she was getting proposed to they helped her prepare, when she got dumped they helped her recover, and when she decided to go to law school they didn't understand what she was doing but they still celebrated with her!! She told them her LSAT score and they probably didn't even know what that meant but they were happy for her!!

And then they found out she was going to trial and had no idea what was going on but they came out to support her anyway because she's their friend and they love her and she's doing something Big and Important so they're excited!!!

The film could have easily portrayed them as catty and judgy, typical sorority girly girl tropes, but instead they made them super sweet and supportive and I love that. Just another reason this is literally a perfect movie.

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The gulf between a good strawberry and a bad strawberry is so wide. A good strawberry makes you feel like a newborn fawn tasting the first ripe berries of the spring meadow. A bad strawberry tastes like licking a log. And it's basically impossible to tell them apart by looking at them. Roulette fruit.

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I hate that I’m always trying to find cool biology themed stuff to wear but all the “nature inspired” clothing companies just have like two crossed arrows or a minimalistic mountain on a sweatshirt. Fucking lame, that’s barely even nature-adjacent. Put the life cycle of a salamander on a jacket, put hyena skeleton patterns on leggings, put a damn field guide of birds of prey on a peacoat and THEN you can have my money. Do NOT give me a shirt with a leaf on it that says “stay wild” or some bullshit I would much prefer clothing that broadcasts to everyone around me how many teeth an adult Jaguar has or how some pitcher plants can catch and digest rats.

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small comp of random and funny twosentencehorror (and 2sentence2horror) posts

i have others but don't feel like sifting through 500+ files for them right now