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katymoonyblack · 2 years

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i'm going like. just a little bit insane hoping you're gonna expand babysitter! remus... why is it that i love rich boy! sirius and actual angel (devil) baby! remus lupin so much

Here’s the expanded first chapter, because why not? You’ve already read the first half anyway! No updates anytime soon though, sorry.

The Sitter

Chapter One: In which Sirius Black finds himself enamored with his godson’s babysitter, the always clever but much too young Remus Lupin.

See the original ficlet HERE.

Sirius hated going on dates.

It was the back and forth about inane topics that irritated him the most…or maybe the awkward pause when they ran out of those topics. Perhaps it was the moment his date inevitably asked about his family? Actually, no. The part of dating Sirius hated most was when the waiter brought the check. Yeah, he was a successful attorney and didn’t mind paying but it would be nice if someone at least offered to treat him.

Regardless, at the end of the day all these problems came back to the real issue, which was that Sirius found most people boring. Especially the people who wanted to date him because most of the people who wanted to date him were social-climbing vipers on top of being boring.

He was so busy wallowing in his unfortunate luck that he failed to notice the speed bump ahead of him. He hit it going thirty miles an hour at the exact moment he brought his water bottle to his lips. The water spilled out of his mouth as well as out of the bottle, effectively drenching his silk dress shirt.

Sirius coughed the water out of his lungs. He hated going on dates.

---

ThumpThumpThumpThumpThump! Sirius was on the verge of barging in when the door finally cracked open.

“James—” the words caught in Sirius’ throat.

In place of James or Lily Potter stood a stranger. An attractive stranger. The prettiest fucking stranger Sirius had ever seen. The mysterious creature spoke: “Can I help you, sir?”

Sir hit Sirius harder than it should have. The stranger was young. Not teenager-young but Sirius couldn’t know for sure. This thought knocked the sense back into him and he remembered his obligation to demand answers of strangers who answered his best friend’s door, no matter how pretty they happened to be.

“Who are you?”

“I’m the babysitter,” the stranger answered simply.

Little Harry Potter took that moment to reveal himself. “Uncle Padfoot!” With a jot and a leap, Harry threw himself into Sirius’ arms. The familiar scent of his fruity shampoo twisted Sirius’ gut; he hadn’t seen Harry in weeks. On Monday he’d tell his secretary to clear a day for Harry. They’d go to the zoo and the arcade and wherever else Harry wanted.

“So you’re the Uncle Padfoot I’ve heard so much about.” The babysitter’s voice was smooth like honey and Sirius wanted to taste.

“People above the age of seven know me as Sirius Black,” Sirius replied, trying not to let his voice drop to a purr.

“Remus Lupin.” Remus held out a hand to shake. It was slender and delicate but calloused at the same time and Sirius wondered what it would feel like on—

Sirius cut himself off, “Nice to meet you.” This was a no-go. He would just have to burn that into his brain because hitting on his Godson’s (twenty-year-old?) babysitter was unacceptable whichever way he twisted it. He ran a hand through Harry’s messy hair to ground himself.

“James and Lily went out for a movie,” Remus explained. “They should be home soon.”

Sirius grinned in a friendly-but-definitely-not-flirtatious way. “I was on my way to dinner when I had a little spill. I came to swipe one of James’ shirts.”

Remus stepped aside in invitation. Sirius might have bolted had Harry not grabbed his hand and led him happily through the foyer.

The first thing Sirius noticed when they reached the kitchen was the mess. Lily Potter’s kitchen was ordinarily kept with the sterile cleanliness one would expect of a chemist of her stature. Now, there were books and toys and fruit snacks scattered across every surface. Sirius whistled. “It was nice knowing you, Mr. Lupin.”

Remus laughed and opened his mouth to explain but Harry beat him to it.

“Remus taught me about Egypt!” He waved a lego in the air. “I learned all about the pyramids and Cleopatra and the mummies.” Then he proudly held up a worksheet overflowing with his messy scrawl. “I finished all my homework and it’s only Saturday!”

Sirius quirked an eyebrow but didn’t hold back his grin. Harry was an incredibly smart and intuitive boy but his genius (the best kind of genius, if you asked Sirius) didn’t typically translate over to his schoolwork. To see him so excited about learning was a novel sight and one that the Godfather in Sirius reveled in. “I’m so proud of you!” He knelt down to reach Harry’s eye level. “Now that you’re done, your schedule is all clear to catch a movie tomorrow, yeah?”

Harry’s big green eyes popped open and fuck if Sirius didn’t love this boy more than anything in the world. “Yes!”

“Then we better clean all this up before your Mom gets home,” Sirius winked.

“Why don’t you put all your toys back in your room and I’ll finish up in here?” Remus suggested.

“Okay!” Harry exclaimed. He tossed all his toys into a bucket faster than Sirius thought he was capable and raced out of sight. Sirius used this opportunity to let himself upstairs into James and Lily’s bedroom to choose a crisp white shirt. He returned to find Remus bent over the kitchen table.

The fucking punk was doing it on purpose. He had to be.

Remus stood up and turned to face Sirius, paper towel and cleaning spray in hand. His pretty pink lips curled up into a smile. Yes, definitely on purpose. “Good as new?”

Sirius nodded then cleared his throat. “I see why James and Lily trust you with Harry,” he said to keep the conversation on something decidedly neutral and un-sexy. “How’d you meet?”

“I bartend at Fortescue’s on the weekends. The owner’s daughter Alice—”

“Alice Longbottom? I went to school with her husband.”

“You Ivy League types really do all know each other, don’t you? Anyway, I started babysitting slash tutoring Neville and I guess Alice spread my name around.”

I really ought to send Alice a bottle of Dom for her birthday. “Babysitter, tutor, and bartender. Do you also juggle and solve crime?”

A small laugh puffed out of Remus’ mouth and Sirius’ heart pounded a half-second quicker. “I also intern at a middle school three times a week, which is basically the same thing. I’m a senior at Hogsmeade State—”

College senior, thank God. Not that Sirius was going to make a move anyway…

“—and I’d rather hustle now instead of suffocating under six years of student loans on a teacher’s salary later.”

A balloon inflated inside Sirius. He didn’t become the youngest partner at one of the most prestigious law firms in the country by sitting on his ass. He could see that mentality in Remus—that drive to do the best, to be the best. What Sirius had just witnessed with Harry was evidence enough. “And you like the hustle…?” Sirius ventured.

Remus shrugged with a charming grin. “I get bored easily.”

They were both startled by the sound of the front door opening. Not a second later, James and Lily strolled in, looking flushed and too happy.

“Hey, you,” James greeted Sirius, cocking his head to the side in confusion.

“Hey,” Sirius replied, “I needed a clean shirt and was closer to here than my place.” His eyes wandered over to the oven to check the time (which up until this point he hadn’t been following at all) and he realized that if he left right now he’d still be fifteen minutes late to his date. To be honest, he didn’t feel all that bad about it.

“Harry’s upstairs putting his toys away,” Remus said, “We made it through the rest of his homework.”

Lily clasped her hands together excitedly. “Oh thank you, Remus!”

“We had a lot of fun together,” Remus replied. “He was great.”

“Let me give you a ride home,” James offered.

At Sirius’ puzzled expression, Remus explained, “My car’s in the shop.” Then he bit his bottom lip.

Fuck it.

Sirius—knowing full well that he was about to text Caradoc Dearborn and tell him that he was sorry but a family emergency had unfortunately arisen—asked, “Where do you live?”

“Downtown—on Fourth street.”

“I can give you a ride. It’s on my way,” Sirius lied. He saw James and Lily shoot him matching glares out of the corner of his eye but paid them no mind.

Remus treated Sirius to another smile but this one wasn’t sweet. “Thanks, Sirius. I’d love a ride.”

“Sirius?” James asked tightly, “Can I talk to you for a second?”

“With the traffic and all, we better get going—”

“No,” Lily cut in with a growl. “You really want to go talk to him.”

Holding back a growl of his own, Sirius smiled at Remus. “I’ll be right back.”

As soon as they reached the privacy of James’ office, James smacked Sirius. “You’re not fucking the babysitter.”

“I’m not—”

“This is literally the only babysitter Harry hasn’t run off. We love him.”

Sirius rolled his eyes. “Okay, let’s say I do want to fuck him—“ He did. “—what difference will it make to Harry?”

“Remus will quit because you will fuck him and never talk to him again.”

“That’s not true,” Sirius huffed. “I’m not that kind of guy.”

James scoffed. “Oh, yeah. You’re going to seriously date a college student when you can’t even make it past a second date with men your own age? Which, by the way, brings me to my next point—you’re twelve years older than him.”

To be fair, Sirius hadn’t thought that far ahead. Begrudgingly, he conceded, “Okay, point made. But I’m still going to take him home because I already offered. And there’s no harm against looking at the hot twenty year old.”

“As long as you don’t touch the hot twenty year old, we’re happy.”

“You’re happy,” Sirius muttered under his breath.

They found Lily and Remus back at the kitchen island sharing some sliced fruit. “Ready to go?” Sirius asked. Remus nodded and hopped down from the stool he was perched on.

“So, we’ll see you next Saturday?” Lily asked Remus.

“Yes,” Remus chirped. “Thanks so much for inviting me, I’m really looking forward to it.”

“What’s going on next Saturday?” Sirius demanded.

“The barbeque we invited you to weeks ago.”

“No you didn’t.”

“Ask your secretary.”

“Whatever,” Sirius said, mentally clearing his plans for next Saturday.

They were only in the car for about two minutes when Sirius’ stomach grumbled. He was half starved. It really wasn’t safe for him to drive like this. What if his blood sugar got too low? He wasn’t diabetic but it was better to be safe than sorry. And there was nothing wrong with eating with the hot twenty year old (though he’d much rather eat something other than food). “Are you hungry?” Sirius asked.

“Starving. No offense to your friends, but vegan chicken nuggets and sliced papaya doesn’t really cut it.”

“You think that’s bad? The last time I was there they tried to serve me eggplant parmesan.”

“Wow. I thought they liked you?”

Sirius shrugged. “Lily knows I could steal James if I wanted to.”

Remus laughed and Sirius loved it because it wasn’t a fake half-hearted chuckle meant to stroke Sirius’ ego (though Sirius’ ego was certainly stroked right now).

“There’s this place right off Hudson,” Remus said after a few minutes, “It’s a little hole-in-the-wall but they have the best burgers in town. My treat.”

“Not a chance.”

“I insist! You’re doing me a favor right now. Besides, your friends pay generously.”

“Well that’s the least they can do for trying to poison you.”

Sirius made sure to get rid of his cocky grin by the time they reached the restaurant. The place really was a tiny hole-in-the-wall with only framed pictures of unrecognizable people as decor; but the food smelled great and they were seated right away in a cozy booth in the back. Sirius would tip the waitress extra for that.

“So what do you do?” Remus asked, taking a sip of his coke.

“I’m a senior partner at Moody, Shacklebolt, and Vance.”

“You’re a lawyer?”

“Yes, sir.”

“So do you represent, like, criminals?”

“No. Well...” Sirius thought about it, “...sometimes. I’m a corporate attorney so I deal more with business deals and corporate lawsuits.”

“Wow,” Remus said, sounding genuinely impressed.

Though Sirius swelled with pride, he needed to change the subject. Ninety-nine percent of his life was dedicated to work; he didn’t need to talk about it at his non-date with the hot twenty-year old too. Clearing his throat, he asked, “What’s your major?”

“English.”

Pleased, Sirius quickly said, “I majored in English in undergrad too.”

“Really?” Remus asked. A surprised smile blossomed across his face and fuck Sirius just wanted to bite those dimples.

“Yeah,” Sirius replied, making an effort not to leer. “A lot of my mentors suggested it. The critical thinking and research skills you learn in literature classes transfer over to law more than most people know. I mean, most of my time is spent rereading thousand page contracts. Or, it used to be, at least. Now I have associates for that.”

Remus snorted. “What a life.”

“It’s nice to be on top,” Sirius said (purely metaphorically).

“I guess I can kind of relate. Whenever we get a new server at the restaurant I get to put them on bitch duty.”

“Give a man a little power and he becomes incorrigible.”

Remus nodded, “That pretty much sums up your whole career doesn’t it?”

“You said it, not me.” Sirius cleared his throat. “What are you reading now?”

“Too many things,” Remus sighed. “But Winesburg, Ohio is probably the only thing I’m enjoying right now. It makes me feel creative.”

“It’s the apples, right?”

“Yes!” Remus exclaimed, “And ‘A Man of Ideas’ really does it for me.”

///

“C’mon!”

“Please tell me you don’t have a brother,” Sirius deadpanned.

“I’m not saying he was justified,” Remus argued, “I’m just saying that King Hamlet was a warrior King. He would have spent most of his life off in battle. Claudius would have already been the one to rule the kingdom and handle the day to day politics.”

“You probably think Gertrude was innocent too you sick fuck.”

Another bout of sweet laughter filled Sirius’ car and only subsided when Remus said, “Hey, this is me—the red brick building on the left.”

Sirius brought his car to a gentle stop right in front of the building’s entrance. The joy that had warmed him only seconds before came to a stop right along with it.

“Do you want to come up? I have whipped cream and chocolate syrup,” Remus smirked, “for sundaes of course.”

“I would love to come up—” Sirius winced; it physically pained him to force his next words out. “—but it’s not a good idea.”

“Oh,” Remus muttered, looking genuinely gobsmacked.

Sirius figured very few people rejected Remus Lupin and for good reason. It was an act against nature, surely. He’d probably be struck down by a stray lightning bolt on his way home.

Still, he trudged forth: “If it wasn’t for James and Lily—“

Remus cut him off with a tight smile. “I get it. You don’t have to explain anything.”

“No, please let me—“

But Remus was already out of the car. “Really,” he said with forced pleasantry, “don’t worry about it. I’ll see you around. I guess. Thanks for the ride.” And with that, he closed the door with just shy of a slam and lightly jogged up into his building.

Sirius sighed. He wished he’d be struck down by a stray lightning bolt—it’d probably hurt less.

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