lil-crouton2

[lil-crouton2]

10-29-22

16:34

Finally on the ambulance for my clinicals, but I should probably back up to the last time I posted.

Since then I've started school, passed all exams and assignments. Passed the evoc driving course. Now I'm acting learned in the field by working on an ambulance, and ER. My manager tried to start a fight with me over it because she decided to stalk my FB page and saw me bragging about how much I love the clinicals. Then she tried to take it to being an issue in December because I have multiple days off for classes and finals, and graduation. I wish I knew what her problem was.

I actually cooked from scratch last night and it turned out really good. I made chicken Parm for my boyfriend and me. I hope everything keeps going on the rise, it's been real depressing lately. Post more later ....

[lil-crouton2]

Okay, a calmer, cooled, more put together rant record.

Can I just start with how on earth could a hostile workplace to this degree exist..

I started in the service department around Easter. I remember this because I was given these dollar packs of puncha-balloons.

The male employee (D) was the manager and the female employee (H) was assistant manager.

Tbh they are still the same job titles today...

I work in an office with two female receptionist (P) and (K). When I first started I was supposed to take messages, or page the advisor to speak with the client calling. I also responded to voicemails, and ran said paper "tickets" to the advisor to give call backs. While I don't whole heartly agree with process, fine it's the rules so compliance it is.

The longer I've been back here the worse (H) would become.. at first it was just bad looks. You know like stank face, when you don't like someone so you stare them down a lot to "intimidate". For a while she tried like hell to brainwash me to be the company snitch and rat out every little misdeed. I told her no thanks, that's not my job, and I'm not here for drama. After all that is why I transfered from the front desk, my coworker up there was certified crazy.

When she (H) realized I'm no help in that field she began ostracizing me. Then she directed her attention to (K).

Side note (K) used to be friends with (H) , like 20 years of friendship. (H) had (k) hired to help the reception office. She was hired right before I transferred. Another side note (K) end up helping a married in family member get a job here to (L).

Back to where I was though. (K) and I began talking and getting to know each other since we share an office. She is nice, and live in Jersey for some time because when she gets upset, she has a hard jersey accent. But anyway, (H) didn't like that (k) and I were nice- friendly to one another. (Maybe jealousy, since that was her friend first)

So instead of getting over their jealousy, they decided to micro manage agressively. This started with changing the rules to something new and different everyday, while this is fine, she wouldn't communicate that things had changed. So because these rules were not communicated to the reception office, obviously they were broken in (H)'s eyes . So she would take upon herself to burst through our office door, *during business hours* *while we are working* *answering phones* and she would begin yelling at us like we are dogs that pissed on the floor. After these "meetings" as she dubbed them, she would leave and continue on as nothing happened. After so many times of this cycle happening she upped the Annie. Now she was screaming and cursing.. she did this so loud in fact, a customer I was on the phone with and assisting heard her antics and was embarrassed and stated "I'm so sorry, I see I called at a bad time.. I , uh, I'll just drive up there and ask a service advisor because I can hear your office is ,uh, in the middle of something..." I feel so mortified I apologized to her and stated "I severely apologize for the outbursts you hear it is the service manager, I'm sorry you can hear her" and disconnected the call.

Around this time (P), who also sits here with (K) and I, had left for a small vacay- break thing. Took a few days off type deal. During this another situation arrived involving a customer being told by an advisor that we do not work on a certain brand of vehicle. This customer called back demanding a manager so they were given to (H). Now you would think as a manager you would investigate who the client talked to since it could not be provided. Nope. No. Not even close... Instead (H) decided to snatch the door so hard I believed the office was in danger. *Still answering phones btw* She begins not yelling but screaming at us, stating that someone is getting fired for telling a customer no. " WHAT WOULD POSSES US TO TELL SOMEONE IF WE WORK ON A BRAND OR NOT. YOU ALL ARE RECEPTIONIST, YOU ARENT ADVISOR MECHANICS OR THE LIKE. SO ONE OF YOU FESS UP NOW WHO SPOKE TO *REDACTED* AND TOLD HER WE DONT WORK ON THOSE. BECAUSE YOU ARE DONE!!!" Obviously none of us spoke to her because as previously mentioned.. we take messages in carbon books that duplicate the message as we write them. We checked them all, no entry for ms. *Redacted* not happy that we told the truth she decided to scream again, this time stating "WELL SINCE YOU ARE ALL LYING AND COVERING FOR ONE ANOTHER ILL WAIT TILL YOU ARE ALL PRESENT, ILL HAVE THE CLIENT COME IN, AND ILL DO A VOCAL LINE UP SO SHE CAN PICK YOUR VOICE OUT AND I CAN FIRE YOU AND WRITE THE REST UP FOR COVERING. KEEP IT UP AND ILL REPLACE ALL OF YOU!!

Obviously upset/distraught by the prospect of being fired for something we didn't do, I confided in a service advisor (M). What I didn't know is that (M) was the person that spoke to *redacted* and said we don't work on the brand of vehicle she had, as she was told by (H) . (M) confronted (H) and told her what really happened and (H) wouldn't even apologize. Hell she even acted like it never happened. Right back to "normal".

Not long after this she decided we are to where uniforms. Again I have no quarrel with these things, as long as it's communicated to me so I can follow. Here where the quarrel is. (H) does not and will not answer you if it's afterhours/weekends (when serviced is closed). (H) decided it was appropriate to start an unconsensual group chat, giving out our personal phone numbers to everyone in the group, past 7 at night once we are all long off the clock and long been home. She did this to let us know there is a new uniform policy in place and if we don't have clothes to comply we have the weekend to buy them. If we do not do this we will be written up and or fired for insubordination. So naturally panicked, we all rushed to get this dress code in order.

*dress code in question * "employees must wear closed toe shoes, black-khaki-gray pants, and until polos are ordered, solid color "nice" dress shirts are permitted."

Most of us had at least part of this requirement, but some of us still have to buy stuff to cover a week's worth of this dress code. (Not doing laundry ever night sorry)

That next Monday rolled around and for the most part we all were in compliance. No harm, no foul, all good! Accept there was foul... She meant the dress code for just my office (K,P, and I) nobody else in the entire department was told this same "code". I spoke with (H) and explained all my dress shirt were not just a single solid color.. is there anyway I can wear one of my hundreds patterned dress shirts instead of wasting money on a shirt I'll temporarily wear till the uniform polos came in. (H) caved and said this was fine. A few days later I had to go up to the front building (where the gm, and front desk are located) while up there the front desk was talking to me about how great the new shirts were, I told her how we don't have any, in fact nobody even collected orders like colors and sizes from us. Hearing this she called the gm over and told him about it and he had me get my offices colors and sizes to return to the front desk. (H) found out and tried to confront me in a room with other people trying to humiliate/ intimidate me. I told her I wasn't sure what was happening, then later texted her to say what happened above and that I didn't say it earlier when asked in person because I don't take to be humiliated or intimidated in front of other people. I am not the kind of person that accepts being talk down to like an animal. Per usual, (H) sent "K" and spoke no more.

After that it seemed to cool down and die off a little. I thought maybe (H) will finally be chill. We got 2 uniform shirts and went about our days.

Around june-july I decided to apply to college for EMT class. I was accepted and won a scholarship! I got my acceptance packet which contained dates-times-and other information on requirements and class. Not only did I save it to multiple emails and devices. But I sent it to (H) and human resources for the days off to go to the mandatory orientation for the school and got it approved by the HR coordinator.

A few days before my orientation, I received a text from (H) she decided that I could give up my *accepted* day off since (K) was booked for a half day due to doctor's appointment. When I responded and told her that's not an option my all day orientation was mandatory and my scholarship is riding on this, she told me that (K) and I need to fight it out and decide who's stuff is more important.

Instead of continuing text I was furious and marched straight up to the GM's office and keyed him in on what was happening. I showed him the text she sent as well. What I didn't know till then was as I marched up there, she saw me, panicked, and texted the gm changing the whole story, stating that she didn't realize two people were off and needing to utilize one the the front desk employees to cover.

Irritated, I began telling him of all the above listed issues, and he cut me off saying I need to understand (H) is going through her own things and I need to give her slack. "She's trying" This statement only proved to me complaints go nowhere but the trash so instead I've been keeping a notebook at home and now I'm transferring it to digital file here.

Orientation came and went, (and I went to it by the way) and things died down once again, I sent (H) another email remindering her, of the schedules and now needed screenings and requirements. She never acknowledged the email, so I asked in person if she got them, she looked me up and down, rolled her eyes and said yes then turned her chair away so I would leave.

Before I did though, I stopped and reminded her that some schedule will need to be in the works since my shift is currently 8-5 and my class is currently 5-9. She spun her chair , pissed, and told me I need to figure it out, and while I was at it figure which is more important, my job or my college. *Stupid comment really but whatever*

When I didn't back down she told me she will just have to hire someone to make up the two 30 min leaves for each week, since I wont work them. I told her good luck, turned and left.

August arrived , requirements are done (not easily mind you I got flack from (H) on it to.

I think it's part of the reason she demands Dr notes no matter what. And again it was only for my office. Nobody else in service had to follow that rule. Keep in mind we had advisors that would leave for their 30 minutes to an hour lunch break and not come back for multiple hours at a time.

But whatever... This brings us to near current time. The week before last Thursday I think, (K) had been going through a lot of personal stuff, stuff I ain't getting into. (K) also has multiple autoimmune diseases. They can be triggered into worse episode with stress, so she was vomiting and passing blood anally. An employee (B) overheard her vomiting in the bathroom and decided to react by rushing to get Lysol spray and Lysol wipes, and begin wiping everything (K) touched, claiming "well can't be to careful got family with cancer" then ran off to (H)'s office. (K) then went to (H)'s office to let her know that she was having a medical episode and needed to go home to eliminate any further stress which would end up leading to hospitalization. Instead of being a kind considerate or even thoughtful individual (H) decided to take it upon herself to not just spray (K) but instead soak and suffocate her with Lysol spray. Not only is this an arrestable offense and a felony charge . The object she used, being the Lysol spray is an allergic trigger to (P) and would cause her to have such an allergic reaction that she would die if not be hospitalized for at least a month. This humiliated (k) and thus (K) went home without any further instruction she had ingested so much Lysol in fact that she can no longer talk for 3 Days time because it had burned her vocal cords and throat. Due to this I had to cover those shifts and didn't get to leave on normal scheduling. I had to leave it at 5:30 instead when service closed. Last week (K) had custody court as expected in these matters it got emotional and hard to deal with, (H) told her well it's video court, just do it on campus in your car. She did this and court went bad and (k) was super upset and she was asked to go home by main manager (D). That Thursday and Friday the owners brother was sent to service to manage and reshape protocols and policies due to overall bad reputation. Friday, I walked in there in front of (D), (H), & (T)- owners brother and reminded (H) my official schooling begins Monday August 22 at 5pm. She faked being friendly and said that's wonderful and thanks for reminding her. I say fake because the second I stepped in this Monday (yesterday) she blew my cell phone up claiming I had never told her my class schedule or that I ever told her my times and dates that I need to leave early and what not.

Thank you over to today and before I even left my driveway this morning she started blowing my phone up saying she didn't get all of my class schedules and I need to figure out why and that and that I need to figure it out and get it over to her cuz she only has 2 months so when I answered her stating okay let me see where the mistake was she sent back she only had 2 months which she's already stated so instead of answering her wait until I got to work resent it and then ask her in person if she got them as of 5:00 p.m. today she has now told me I am a part-time employee losing my benefits and she's going to hire someone to cover the hours that I can't wish by the way is an hour's it's 30 minutes at most I have to be somewhere at 5:00 I need to leave by at least 4:15 4:30. The more and more that happens I will come back to this post and I will add it and we'll just keep going

Update 8.23.22 @ 6:35pm

Tried to talk to the general manager, apparently I am the bad guy.

[lil-crouton2]

My manager try one more piece of b******* to try and stop me from getting an education I swear to God I'm going to lose it. I've been having to deal with her I don't know since June. I decided to apply to go to college to be an EMT and once I knew I was accepted I had won a scholarship and I had an orientation coming up which you have to go to I decided to tell my manager since it would be way ahead of time and everything could be arranged I took my days off needed for the orientation and send all the paperwork needed to show her what days would be affected. The day came for me to go and she messaged me telling me I needed to fight it out with another employee who took the same day off because she can't have more than one person out I brought this to the general manager's attention and he solved it but the manager of the service centers only getting worse she assaulted a co-worker by suffocating her with Lysol and Springer from head to toe nail mainly hovering over her face the said employee wasn't sick she had an autoimmune disease and couldn't control when she needed to go to the bathroom not to mention all the time she text me off the clock expecting me to answer her but if something happens and I need to talk to her off the clock she won't answer until we come back to work and that's if you're lucky but I gave her multiple warnings that class was starting today not just today but the week before and the months before she even had a college print out of my schedule she decided to argue with me she threatened to cut my hours in her part-timer to make up for lost time and she even tried to tell me to choose my job or my school and when she realized I wasn't going to choose my job she backed down I don't know I guess I just want to get this all put together in rent here so that way I have a record showing all the crap she's done to me and I've tried to take pictures and keep screenshots of all the crap she sends me but she tries to catch me by talking or calling on the phone but I'm done acknowledging her unless she wants to text or email I will make her leave a paper trail

[lil-crouton2]

If I don't vent here, I might actually kill someone...

Since 10 pm yesterday, my existence has only become more and more painful.

It started with my attacker tracking me down through fake media accounts, then my boyfriend of 6 years was not supportive at all.  Work is even worse

[lil-crouton2]

Today is July 27th and it is currently 11:31 at night I don't think I'm going to sleep anytime soon because it's been a bad night I don't even know how to begin talking about this but I guess I should probably vent it here about 10 years ago when I was 14 I went to an internet based School or everything was on a computer but you still had to come to school so you can work on the computer I was partnered with this kid that I thought was going to be a friend he really stayed more of an acquaintance cuz it was a socially awkward child and didn't really like to talk much but very soon after we became acquainted he decided to attack me and I don't know that I should get too terribly graphic on here cuz I don't want to trigger anybody but it was bad enough to the point I was so humiliated and traumatized that I didn't say anything about it for 2 years and I let it go and when I finally told police about my attack the person that did it only got statutory assault on a minor because I was 14 like I said and he was 17 almost 18 he's going to turn 18 and like I think a month or two of the crime happening but like I said it's been about 10 years now because I'm 24 I'll be 25 in May and he decided to try and track me and see where I was I don't know what his intentions are or were I'm sure they're not great because all he ranted and rambled about was that my mom's not a black cop and and how I don't know what rape is and I never said he raped me he was charged with assaulting a minor not statutory rape it was statutory assault of a minor his genitals didn't touch me however other appendages did and I was forced to stay silent because while the attack happened I was gagged but he made a fake profile on social media tonight and tried to track me down and succeeded I don't know if he's trying to find where I live I don't know if he was just trying to find me on Facebook to bring up old problems but he believes in his head and what he likes to tell everyone was it's just a case of angry ex-girlfriend's mother who had all the power go to her head which is not true I was never his girlfriend I mean f*** I wasn't even his friend I just had to sit next to the f****** kid I was assigned seating and he was my lab partner unfortunately but he's decided to write his own side of the story all over social media about 2 years ago and I just found it because he tagged me and he said to make fake profiles to like I said track me down and harass me and I don't know get a rise out of me who knows well I was upset when this all first happened and I figured out who it was it was doing it yeah I got a little upset but I'm over it now

[lil-crouton2]

Today is March 23rd it is currently 11:43 a.m. it has been an overcast stormy day and so far I have had a gluten-free chocolate donut with a bowl of strawberries and pine berries.

I have taken today's dose of medication so I haven't forgotten and for lunch I intend to have chicken enchiladas with street corn.

[lil-crouton2]

Today is March 22nd it is 10:23 in the morning my weight loss journey is starting completely over because my scale malfunctioned and lied to me. In February it said I dropped 20 lbs and then in a matter of hours it said I was 247 after weighing a couple hours before saying I was 229.

So we're starting the month of March at 2:47.8 it is currently the 22nd and I am 244.3 I am starting a workout regimen everyday along with vitamin supplements and clean eating I am going to cut every drink out except water fruit juice and the occasional tea. I am going to be taking a women's multivitamin and women's probiotic a biotin gummy a vitamin c and zinc gummy and my previously purchased cholesterol off which is to help repair my already severely damaged liver. Today I am sending a goal to eat three healthy square meals today take all my vitamins and get my college work started for the school year coming in May I have done my small wake up routine for my workouts which is stretching and doing exercises like lunges and body weight workouts using just the weight of my own body I did that for about 10 minutes this morning and I will either go on a walk or play just dance this afternoon.

[lil-crouton2]

Today is January 2nd it is 6:17 p.m. and I have been putting off chores for 2 weeks. I also have decided not because of New Year's but because of my own well-being to never eat food outside of my house ever again. This is due to my autoimmune disease and severe liver damage. Seems like all foods I eat have an allergen in it and I just feel constantly sick unless I make my own food. I am at 240 lb and I want to get down to 165. I also am due to start EMT school in May and get my concealed carry in the middle of January. I have been selling stuff on Facebook to make pocket change and gas money because doordash takes way too much gas to even make a profit. I also can't seem to get the motivation to clean my house. There is a 4-ft pile of clothing on my bed and a handful of dishes still in the sink waiting for me to do something about it. Well I guess I'm going to use the restroom and then try to clean. My mom goes into surgery tomorrow to repair her ACL in her knee because she shredded it at work. We'll talk later.

[lil-crouton2]

Today is December 28th 2021 and it is 6:40 p.m. I have just sat down to eat dinner which is bourbon salmon with mashed potatoes street corn and Asian cooked spinach which is sesame oil spinach soy sauce garlic sesame seeds and a pinch of sugar and I am drinking a Shirley Temple in a martini glass because I don't like alcohol

today was an okay day

we buried Darby

his funeral was really nice and I think it's what he would have wanted he died Christmas day but his funeral was today I think I got my ugly tears out and I think I'll be okay

I go back to work tomorrow and once I get done eating dinner here I'm going to put my lunch in clothes together and finish up on the chores I was supposed to do that 3 days I was off so I got a few dishes to wash and a couple close to fold but other than that I'm okay

[lil-crouton2]

Today is December 27th 2021 and it is currently 8:48 a.m. I'm eating breakfast and prepared my attire for tomorrow. It came to light that a good friend of mine passed away Christmas morning and his funeral is tomorrow I think I'm done crying I've been ugly crying for a while because he was taken too soon but I guess that's what brain cancer does to people. I tried taking glutenies which is a supplement to help lessen the effects of celiacs disease but I think some of the food I ate made me sick anyway because I've had headaches and stomach cramps for the last few days I guess I'm going to try and be extra gluten-free this next week to try and get it to go away other than the unfortunate news of my friend passing Christmas was relatively well I got an OLED Nintendo switch that docs my TV I got some gluten-free cookbooks from my mom I got a really cool watch for my boyfriend who also bought the Nintendo switch I got a food processor along with many other candies and outfits and accessories from family I'm currently eating and sausage and cheese omelette with iced coffee and I'll probably text later

[lil-crouton2]

Today is December 23rd it is 9:20 p.m. tomorrow is Christmas Eve except my boyfriend and I are going to open presents tomorrow since Christmas day is very busy with all of our families currently I'm feeling okay I ate a gluten-free chocolate donut for breakfast I ate my leftover gluten free pizza for lunch and for dinner I had gluten free spaghetti with tomato sauce and ate a snack of corn chips tortilla type chips with guacamole cup I cooked and iced my spice cake that I will be bringing to my mom's Saturday I am semi stressed about the upcoming holidays even though I'm off for about a week I'm still semi stressed because of all the family gatherings which gives me high social anxiety I think I'll be okay though I haven't heard from my dad in a couple days last I heard he was somewhere in New York or Maine or something I've been playing animal crossing to kill the time and the last time I weighed myself I lost 8 lbs in a week and a half I have a slight headache feel a little fatigued but I think that's from the liver damage I previously talked about

[lil-crouton2]

I like to apologize for my hiatus I've been going through a lot and haven't had time to work today is December 22nd it is 7:53 p.m. and I am working on my Christmas treats for the weekend I am going to be off for the next week so I may or may not catch up on my postings because I know I haven't been here for a while now I got results back my lipoma is nothing it is just a malformation of fat cells in the back of my neck and shouldn't be a problem when I start losing weight I have dropped 8 lb in a week and a half and I also have severe liver damage which is causing me to change how I eat I eat no greasy fatty foods I can still have my gluten-free pizzas but as for chicken wings and stuff I have to air bake them or I can't have them because the grease is destroying my liver I am currently very fatigued due to this and just pretty much constantly tired and aggravated but I am getting through this the best I can

[lil-crouton2]

It is November 11th 8:24 p.m.

Went to the doctor today I forgot all my results back I have a lipoma growth on the back of my neck causing headaches and I've also done damage to my liver and bloodstream. My mom took me around town today to pick up a diet change worth of vegetables and produce so I can start losing weight not eating so much. This is going to be really difficult because of built years of habit of convenient quik nasty greasy fried food like french fries and chicken tenders and burgers and anything else you can get in a Drive-Thru. I look forward to the future though and hope for a better one

[lil-crouton2]

[lil-crouton2]

Today is October 19th 2021 it is currently 8:47 p.m. and I work tomorrow. Well I had the meeting about the rays and I ended up getting a $5 raise to 15 an hour. Maybe I actually might put forth a little more effort and do extra things here and there since I got a raise finally. I've been busy all day today I've been up since 7:30 a.m. . I washed a couple loads of dishes I don't have a dishwasher so I have to do it by hand and I did a lot of laundry. Yesterday was a great day my boyfriend and I ended up going to Destin where I got an animal crossing Build-A-Bear and he got the watch he's been looking for for 3 years. I had a manic episode and ended up cleaning majority of the house today.

[lil-crouton2]

Today is October 14th it is a Thursday and it is 8:30 in the morning I am about to get up out of bed go heat up a gluten-free blueberry muffin and a iced coffee I just kind of chill out. I might run to Target later if I can't fix my heels that broke yesterday but if I can't fix them I'll probably run to Walmart or Winn-Dixie and get a tomato and some onion cuz I'm going to make burgers today. I might do it today if they don't email me at work to tell me I have a meeting or not I want to talk to them about getting a raise because I only make 10 an hour and I can't keep living like this. Wish me luck

[lil-crouton2]

Today is October 13th it is 7:40 at night I got off work at 7:00 and I decided to make myself a lovely American dinner consisting of a cheeseburger french fries and cranberry juice with a spicy ketchup dipping sauce and honestly I'm just living my best life right now I actually feel great for once I am having menstrual cramps but other than that I am great I hope future me has even more great days coming and if she doesn't I hope she looks back on this night and remember how happy she was!!