madame-airlock

[madame-airlock]

Okay but... If you're a top and butch (preferably but not necessarily) and want a kinda femme Italian girlfriend who can cook and you live somewhere in Europe... 👀

Yes I'm a little lonely, very horny, I need someone to eat me out until I can't walk straight and I only have Ryanair money

#yes that is my sideblog #but also rbing on main #:)

[madame-airlock]

Lost and found | Alex Blake X F!Reader

Summary: You and Alex are in love with each other but Alex is convinced you love Emily. After a little mishap, you take Alex home where fluff ensues.

Word count: 1,210

A/N: I've been in such a writing slump lately so please excuse me if my writing is a tad off. Apologies for how short it is too.

Dark eyes watched you over the rim of a glass. The liquid sloshing dangerously close to the edge as Alex swirled the burnt umber liquid around her glass. You were across the bar, celebrating Emily’s short return with the rest of the team. Unlike the rest of the team, though, you were bent over the pool table with Emily behind you, guiding your hands as you played against the others. 

Alex couldn’t stand looking at you for any moment longer. Not when you were looking at Emily the way she looked at you. With a defeated sigh, she rose from where she sat, as steady as the sun rose in the morning and set in the afternoon. Risking one last glance at you, the unconscious pull towards you ever present, her heart sank to the depths of her stomach as she realised you were no longer there. 

Nor was Emily.  

The urge to flee the bar and protect herself from further heartbreak, no longer able to endure watching you with Emily, became too persistent to ignore. She went to grab her coat off the stool beside her, huffing out an irritated sigh as it jumped away from her and onto the floor. 

You approached her crouched form. Emily had finally approached the woman she had been eyeing all night, and you had found that you missed Alex’s presence far too much; despite her only being away from you for half an hour. 

“Need a hand?”

She jumped, hitting her head on the stool, as your voice pierced through her quiet struggle. She let out a pained whimper, so muffled that it wouldn’t have been audible unless you were focussed entirely on her. And you were. 

“Oh my god, Alex! I’m so sorry. I never meant to startle you.” You apologised, reaching over to place your hands over her own that cradled the back of her head. 

You removed her hands, checking over her for any visible injuries before rubbing soothing circles into the area she bumped. She looked up at you then, umber eyes wide and doe-like, like a vulnerable animal caught in a trap.

“Are you okay?” 

“Yeah, uh, fine.” 

You could feel a bump forming on her head from where it hit the stool. She watched your eyes fill with concern over her wellbeing and she couldn’t stop her eyes from glossing over. Her head was killing her and you, the cause of her misfortune in the first place, were here with her. You had left Emily and sought her out.

Her heart warmed at your nurturing gestures. A fine blush spread from her cheeks to her ears; a mix of embarrassment and awe for you swirling into a furious red. Too busy with checking her over and pulling her out of the bar, you hadn't noticed Alex’s meek disposition or the subtle blush she was so desperately trying to hide away. 

You felt awfully guilty. The woman you were besotted with had come to harm due to you. Logically, you knew that it was a mistake, easily done, but you wanted to rectify it as soon as possible. So Alex was getting dragged along to your house whilst you thought of a suitable way to take care of her. Alex followed your lead happily. Who was she to deny you and your wishes? She just wanted to be with you. In whatever way you would allow her to be. 

Alex was curled up on the couch, sprawled out like a tired feline at the end of the day. You had given her a bag of peas covered in a tea towel to soothe the bump on her head. Her hot chocolate was visibly steaming, the marshmallows melted into a pillowy layer on top of the saccharine drink. Yet, despite everything, Alex seemed to be in her own little world. Unresponsive to everything around her. Including you. 

Her favourite film was droning on quietly in the background as you quickly washed the dishes. You had an awful habit of letting them pile up and found that washing them right away decreased the chances of that happening. With a soft sigh, you finished up the dishes and dried your hands. 

Alex hadn’t noticed you approach until you gently coaxed her mug out of her hand before sitting down next to her. You nestled yourself under the blankets, huddling yourself close to Alex and basking in her warmth. Leaning against her, you looked up at her through your lashes before asking her what was plaguing her mind. 

“You and Emily seemed to be having fun today.” 

“Yeah? She was helping me beat Morgan and Reid. Although we still lost…” you grumbled off slightly at the end. 

Alex looked at you then. Watching you carefully. Calculating your every move while mulling over what you had said. A slight frown marred her features, unnoticeable to most, but you knew Alex and you knew her tells. 

“What made you come find me?” The question had been itching her since you found her at the bar. Why had you left Emily to find her? After all, you both looked rather… cosy in the position you were in. 

“I wanted to see you.”

You sounded so sincere, so genuine, that she wished she believed you.

“Why? Was Emily not good enough company?”

“What are you trying to say? For a linguist you aren’t very good at communicating, Alex.” You pulled away from her, clutching the blanket closer to your chest as you studied her face. 

“When did you and Emily start dating?” She asked, picking her nails absentmindedly, waiting for your response. 

“You- you think I’m dating Emily?” 

“Well, aren’t you?” 

“Alex, if you think I’m dating Emily then we haven't been doing what I thought we were doing.” You huffed in annoyance. How could a profiler be so intelligent yet so stupid at the same time. 

“Look at me.” You commanded. She needed to see you, really see you, in order for this to play out right. “The only woman I am interested in is sitting on my couch right now.” 

She blinked at you. Once. Twice. Before her eyes widened in relaxation. Her mouth opened slightly and the delicate blush she tried to hide earlier was back. How could she be so foolish? Insinuating that you were in love with someone else when all of your free time was spent with her. 

“Oh.” Her shame alongside the revelation of your feelings knocked the linguist speechless. 

“For such an educated woman, you sure are foolish.”

“Hey!” She whined, smacking you on the arm as soon as she recovered from the initial shock. 

You reached over and grasped her face between your palms. Your fingers smoothed over her cheekbones as you stared adoringly at her. Alex was kicking herself for not noticing your infatuation earlier for you looked at her as if she hung the moon and the stars. 

“You mean everything to me. Without you I wouldn’t be whole. You complete me. You’re the sun to my moon, my other half. And I wouldn't have anybody else other than you.” You professed with such earnestness that Alex couldn’t help but tear up. 

“Are you going to kiss me now?”

And kiss her you did. 

A/NII: I hope this is alright. All of my free time has been spent watch Rizzoli and Isles, doing college work and knitting 😅 so writing has been at the very back of my mind.

#!!!!!!!!! #my heart

[madame-airlock]

i can't get a welcome mat. what if the vampires

[madame-airlock]

Andy: Booby trap? Sure I would easily fall into a trap if I saw boobs.

[madame-airlock]

when I see something dated 2019 I think “oh that’s not too long ago” and then I remember that 2019 was not only five years ago but those five years have somehow contained several lifetimes

[madame-airlock]

Does anyone else have a hard time believing that somebody will wanna stay with you forever bc same

[madame-airlock]

i know its the mets, but this is the coolest shit i’ve ever seen a human being do

[madame-airlock]

And it is sad, lonely, horny hours again.

I know finding a girlfriend/partner is extremely unrealistic but... I honestly just kinda need to get laid

But no, just staring at the ceiling at 3 am. Fun times

#save me top butches save me

[madame-airlock]

I'm not sure how to classify it since I'm not a native speaker and it's something I've learned by imitation. It's a general London/south of the UK accent with bits of more northern accents sprinkled in, purely based on what I am watching at any given time.

rb this and tell me what ur accent is. this has no purpose except the fact i just realized i could have like... mutuals with cockney accents or newfoundland accents or something and thats just wild

[madame-airlock]

Iirc Bea left an entire HOUSE to use as a safe place for young queer people!

sometimes i watch golden girls and i just tear up remembering everything each cast member did for the queer community

estelle getty lost her nephew to AIDS and moved in with him during the last months of his life to take care of him. she started a foundation that cares for people affected by AIDS that's still there to this day. she saw one of the writers on her show was queer, walked right up to him and said "you're one of us!" and promised to protect him. she put her career on the line to become an outspoken ally of AIDS patients at a time when it would've been career suicide

bea arthur was a staunch gay and trans ally who donated a lot of her time and money to helping homeless lgbt youth. when she died, she left them thousands of dollars to stay afloat after she was gone. she was incredibly socially active in the queer community!

rue mcclanahan was a staunch advocate of marriage rights for gay couples and openly devoted her time and money for the fight for equality. she also openly participated in queer spaces and loved the community with her entire heart. she was intimately aware of gay mens' particular love for her character blanche and she fully embraced it

everybody knows by now about betty white's activism, but i'll say it anyway. not only did she join the fight for marriage equality, but she was a great mother to her lesbian stepdaughter. she participated in anti-bullying campaigns specifically against lgbt youth. she accompanied liberace to events because it wasn't safe for him to be out. she loved us and she fought for us just like the others

all four of them did SO MANY amazing things for us, and it makes me happy that we had people like them -- that we still do in people like dolly parton! we didn't deserve them. i wish i could've met all of them and told them how grateful i am!

[madame-airlock]

The only good fascist is a dead fascist. Happy liberation day, Italy

#25th april #liberation day #festa della liberazione #italy

[madame-airlock]

soft asks to get to know people

what song makes you feel better?

what’s your feel-good movie?

what’s your favorite candle scent?

what flower would you like to be given?

who do you feel most you around?

say three nice things about yourself (three physical and three non-physical).

what color brings you peace?

tag someone (or multiple people) who make you feel good. 

what calms you down?

what’s something you’re excited for?

what’s your ideal date?

how are you?

what’s your comfort food?

favorite feel-good show?

for every emoji you get, tag someone and describe them in one word.

compliment the person who sent you this number.

fairy lights or LED lights?

do you still love stuffed animals?

most important thing in your life?

what do you want most in the world right now?

if you could tell your past self one thing, what would it be?

what would you say to your future self?

favorite piece of clothing?

what’s something you do to de-stress?

what’s the best personal gift someone could give you (playlist, homemade card, etc.)

what movie would you want to live in?

which character would you want to be?

hugs or hand-holding?

morning, afternoon or night?

what reminds you of home (doesn’t have to mean house… just things that remind you of the feeling of home)?

[madame-airlock]

The Pacific Ocean is huge.

[madame-airlock]

Everyone can understand at a corporate level that Starbuck is hurting financially in a big way right now. But let me share some insight at a single store level.

I've have friends who work at Starbucks. We're all very open with what goes on behind the scenes at our jobs because we truly don't care about keeping company secrets. We were all talking about how annoying work has been lately and they had volunteered some info on the weekly earnings at their storefront and the numbers are pure garbage!

I was told their Starbucks is only turning a profit of $3000 a week. Now those numbers might sound impressive off the bat, but my friends assured me those numbers were terrible because before the protests they would pull $7000 a week!

The protests have cut their sales by more than half! They're basically only selling less than $40 an hour! If a mom and pop store pulled those numbers they'd be foreclosing their shop as we speak!

Starbucks is hurting. McDonald's is hurting. Many brands and stores are feeling the weight of their anti Palestinian views and they're maulding!! The protests are working. Hurt them some more!

[madame-airlock]

elizabeth mcgovern, photoshoot (2010) | 📸: rebecca reid

#16 year old me watched Downton Abbey and picked her as a favourite IMMEDIATELY #ahhh 16 year old me #how right you were #but also did it seriously take another 3/4 years for you to realise you like women #elizabeth mcgovern #I'm sat

[madame-airlock]

Random ask game asks

Starbucks or Dunkin Donuts?

What's one thing that's stereotypical about you?

Play any instruments?

A show everyone criticizes that you like

A music artist everyone criticizes that you like

Last show you watched

Last movie you watched

Last song you listened to

Last book you read

Your top five most listened to artists this month on Spotify (if you don't use Spotify just say the artists you listen to most)

Ever drank alcohol?

Every smoked anything?

Do you prefer to eat-in or take-out?

If you could time travel what decade would you go to first

An actor everyone loves that you don't like for whatever reason

Something not in your regional dialect that is in your vocabulary

Color of your eyes?

Do you need glasses?

Speak any other languages?

Have any tattoos?

Want any tattoos?

Have any piercings?

Want any piercings?

Do you prefer the hot or cold weather?

Cats or dogs? Or some other pet?

Trendy over comfortable or comfortable over trendy?

Say one thing bad about something you love

Do you prefer to read digitally or from a physical book?

Do you put milk in your hot tea?

Do you know how to play any popular gambling games?

If you have sibling(s) are you the oldest middle or youngest?

A character you relate to for whatever reason?

A quote (from anything) you really love

How many pairs of shoes do you have

Do you have trouble saying any words because of your accent/speech problems?

Earbuds or headphones?

Showers or baths?

Early bird or night owl?

Candles or scented spray?

How often do you change your clothes?

Chess or checkers?

Something you can do that you think is cool?

Perfume or body spray?

What's something that genuinely scares you

LED lights, the room light, or sunlight?

What's something you do differently than everyone else?

If you have hair how often do you style it in some way?

Nail polish, press on nails, or acrylic nails?

How many pets do you have

What's a nickname everyone calls you?

A card/dice/board game you love?

Do you have any fidget toys? If so what's your favorite?

Do you drive?

Your go-to genre of music?

Are you a good multitasker?

Silence or background noise?

A famous movie/show that you've never seen

Any sport you would like to play?

Can you write in cursive?

Is your handwriting neat or at least easy to read?

Colored pencils, markers, or crayons?

How many pillows do you sleep with?

How many blankets do you sleep with?

Do you ever plan to get married one day?

Do you ever plan to have kid(s) one day?

Do you subscribe to any religion?

Something in your room that you think is funny for whatever reason

Would you rather be an actor, singer, comedian, or would you do something on YouTube/twitch/some other site

Are you scared of the dentist?

Do you wear makeup?

If you could be any character of the opposite sex, who would you be?

In the literal sense, are you an introvert or extrovert?

What's something in your room that makes no sense without context

Favorite show as a kid?

Something you know you liked as a kid that you don't remember much from?

Favorite subject in school?

If you could visit any place in the world where would you go?

A show/movie thats been on your watchlist forever but you for some reason keep putting off

Is the name you use online your real name? (Real name does not mean deadname)

Do you have a favorite sibling?

If you were to have a kid what names would you have in mind?

Do you think things like anniversaries are a big deal?

Mobile games or PC/console games?

Do you believe in things like ghosts?

What was your first pets name?

Long sleeve + shorts or short sleeve + pants

Can you do any voice impressions?

What was the first fandom you were genuinely into

Do you prefer womens or mens products?

Scrunchies or ties?

would you be fine having your partner completely provide for you?

Plain clothes or vibrant and eye catching clothes?

Worst date youve ever been on?

Movie date or restaurant date?

Do you split the check or expect only one of you to be paying it?

Favorite fast food place?

How do you make your coffee?

Do you pay attention to the music or the lyrics more?

Are you more energetic or tame?

Are you witty?

[madame-airlock]

(inspired by this one for the sake of full transparency)

#so many good choices