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The Intimacy Gap
in recent society there has been a staggering decline in the pursuit of relationships and intimacy; hook up culture is prevalent, however only in a small section of the youth, whilst divorce rates are at an all time high. "76% of new cases coming from female clients, compared with 60% a year ago." (17th November 2021, Stewarts Law). in this blog post i will discuss why this is happening and the future of relationships.
the peripheral reasonings behind this new development is the post-pandemic effect: due to decreased social interaction during Covid 19, people found intimacy as less of a forefront on their mind. women especially have found their feet independently, with them having more power in high positions, following the #MeToo movement, and a constant pressure on the gender pay gap. with this we have seen more people, especially women, choosing to be single, due to the heightened emotional maturity signified in women, and the less of a need for men to provide for them anymore in the current social climate.
secondly, with the recent events in America, i.e. Roe vs Wade, people are less inclined to engage in casual relationships due to the lack of healthcare and basic needs being provided if the female counterpart becomes pregnant.
Gen Z have also had a direct affect on the intimacy gap with many being outspoken online about not wanting children, or a partner mostly due to the climate emergency we are faced with.
finally what will the future of intimacy and relationships be? in 2017 scientists Neil McArthur and Markie L.C. Twist coined the term "digisexuality" following the increased popularity in relationships via AI (artificial intelligence). following this Eugenia Kuyda founded Replika, an app where you can form relationships with a personalised AI, to escalate the relationship to a sexual one requires a subscription fee, with %40 of users subscribed. this is a great example of using technology for an improved future; for instance province issues could play into someone's inability to date freely in their region, i.e. someone who identifies as homosexual. likewise, those who have struggled to form relationships throughout their life, whether that be through trauma or asexuality, having an AI version will open them up and perhaps make them feel seen. the digisexual era is not new however, for centuries people have been engaged in digital intimacy, via pornography, OnlyFans and Wattpad users, and so it is unsurprising that we have developed further along this phenomenon.
written by magdalen manning
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Living in Harmony
it is no secret that the earth is overheating, sea levels are rising and the climate crisis is real. however, there are ways that us humans can make a vital positive impact, especially to our oceans. at the bottom of this post i will link a number of resources which can help you navigate where to start.
there are various options on which are pivotal the future of the sea’s and the life in it:
conserve water - by conserving water you are saving energy, energy is needed to filter, heat and pump water into your home, using less water keeps more of it in our ecosystems enabling natural habitats and fresh water animals to thrive.
reduce waste - an estimated 8 million tonnes of plastic is offloaded into our oceans each year, with many landfill companies dumping our waste into the ocean itself, 70% of this debris sinks into the ocean's ecosystem, with 15% floats, and 15% lands on our beaches, and 4 billion microfibres sinking below the surface. by recycling, stopping littering and avoiding ocean harming products you are making an impact.
shop wisely - by shopping sustainably you are cutting the profits of the big name food companies who ruin the oceans. if you choose to eat seafood, it is especially is becoming more and more harmful to the planet, by shopping from local, well-managed fisheries and considering smaller, more oily fish such as sardines or herring. furthermore, carry reusable cutlery, metal straws and change your plastic toothbrushes to bamboo ones. moreover, by switching your typical healthcare products, like deodorant, to vegan and natural alternatives is a big help.
vote on ocean issues - electing public officials which priorities lie with the environment can help us protect our marine and ocean life, ensure you do your research before election day comes along and make the decision best for you. likewise subscribe and donate to ocean charities and newsletters.
reduce your carbon footprint - carbon dioxide makes our oceans more acidic thus making it harder for coral reefs and marine organisms to survive. coral reefs are especially important to the earth, and humans as they protect the shorelines from storms, erosion and provide jobs. they also help find new medicines, and provide food, as well as housing numerous marine life, helping with nutrient recycling and water filtration. to reduce your carbon footprint you can: ride a bike, walk or use public transport in juxtaposition to using a car, turn off lights after leaving a room, layer up instead of turning up your thermostat and eat more plant-based food.
volunteer at beach clean ups - there are various beach clean up organisations across the world, not only is it benefitting the oceans and recycling, but is also a great way to meet likeminded people and feel included in a community. otherwise, you can clear up the beach on your visits.
explore the oceans - the ocean generates up to 85% of the oxygen we breathe, meaning without it we are looking at a bleak future, there are numerous documentaries on all major streaming platforms if the beach is inaccessible to you, likewise, the internet is a great tool to learn, some of my favourite marine biologists are Sylvia Earle and David Attenborough, if unable to access the internet from home libraries are a great source for books, and the web. if you have the opportunity to explore the ocean, go as much as possible ! swimming in the sea alone helps us understand the power of the ocean, as well as opening our eyes to many creatures, likewise diving can help us to explore even more of these wonders.
links
Seaspiracy - https://www.netflix.com/title/81014008
Chasing Coral - https://www.chasingcoral.com/the-film/
Puff - https://www.netflix.com/title/81276049
My Octopus Teacher - https://www.netflix.com/title/81045007
Mission Blue - https://mission-blue.org/the-film/
Given - https://www.giventhemovie.com/about
Expedition Wallcea - https://www.amazon.co.uk/Expedition-Wallacea-Matthias-Kopfm%C3%BCller/dp/B08NFDDH9F
written by magdalen manning
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Vogue Italia May 1994 - Michelle Weweje & Michael McCrane by Walter Chin
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Recipe No.4
Vegan Zucchini Noodles with Chickpeas and Zucchini Blossoms
ingredients
4 tablespoons olive oil
2 cloves garlic, minced
2 medium zucchini, cut into noodles with a spiralizer
12 zucchini blossoms, pistils removed, cut into strips
½ cup canned chickpeas, drained and rinsed
salt
6 fresh basil leaves, cut into strips, or to taste
Prep & Serve
Heat olive oil in a large skillet over low heat and cook garlic until softened, about 10 minutes. Add zucchini and zucchini blossoms; mix well with olive oil. Add chickpeas and stir to combine. Season with salt and stir in basil. Serve immediately.
written by magdalen manning
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To Meat or not To Meat
these days being vegan is easier than ever, every grocery store has vegan alternatives to your favourite meals, including lasagna and shepherds pie, however its not just quick meals that are available but also the likes of sausages, cream and chocolate.
with these substitutes available, trying to be vegan is just as easy as being a non-vegan.
some of my favourite alternatives are the following:
Linda McCartney red onion and rosemary sausages
Minor Figures oat milk
Alpro soya cream
Nomo caramel chocolate bars
Vego truffles
Nature’s Store chocolate spread
Nui ice creams
Wicked Kitchen burritos
Quorn vegan chicken slices
Naked without the Oink bacon
Engevita nutritional yeast
Merchant Gourmet red and white quinoa
Violife original flavour grated
The Coconut Collaborative natural yoghurt
written by magdalen manning
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Healthy Habits
creating a routine can benefit your mental health majorly, setting boundaries and tasks everyday helps optimise concentration, expands the mind and exercises all endorphins.
perhaps start by getting a journal, write down 5 questions that you want to ask yourself weekly, then act as if that is your goal for the week, to have positive answers.
exercise is incredibly important, not only for your fitness and health but it boost dopamine, the happy drug, giving a sense of elation after having worked out.
eating healthy is largely important too, of course every body is different and certain diets that may work for some, may not work for others. it is important to take care of your gut health and find what variation works for you, whether it be intermittent fasting, diets, or cheat days.
another thing i would encourage to include in your routine, is a fun activity, this could be reading, drawing or watching a movie. something that requires minimal effect but will relax you and enable peace of mind.
written by magdalen manning
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Recipe No.3
todays recipe is one of my favourites, thai green curry !
ingredients
coconut milk
baby corn
edamame beans
red bell pepper
tomatoes
tofu/meat alternative of your choice
lime leaves
chilli
ginger
lemongrass
spring onions
garlic
prep
blend the lemongrass, garlic, spring onions, chilli, ginger and lime leaves together to create a paste, then put the meat alternative on to fry.
cooking
add the edamame beans, red bell pepper and baby corn to the meat alternative before adding the paste. finally add the coconut milk and leave to simmer for about 10 minutes. eat with rice, or any side of your choice.
written by magdalen manning
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Love Languages
scientists believe there a five major love languages, understanding them can help you navigate relationships, with lovers and friends alike. love languages can also help you learn about yourself and your needs, they demonstrate the specific ways in which a person gives and prefers to receive love.
Quality Time
this love language places emphasis on the time spent with your partner, friends or family, you thrive when you can be alone with them and sharing intimate moments together. it doesn’t matter if you are doing nothing at all or a shared activity, as long as you are in close proximity to them. people with this love language appreciate it more when they have their partners full attention, feel prioritised and cherished.
Words of Affirmation
with this love language the person loves to hear how much their person appreciates them, whether this is through written notes, support or praise, someone with this love language wants to know that you love them and feel reassured.
Physical Touch
this person expresses their love through physical contact over all other expressions. it is to be noted that this love language is not revolved around sexual contact, however more centred upon intimacy. it is thought that physical touch increases oxycontin which is what makes the act of hugging, or holding hands so gratifying.
Acts of Service
acts of service is best described as doing something for your partner that you know they would like, with this you should listen carefully to your partners needs, then act accordingly. it can be as little as cleaning their room after staying in it, or watering their plants, something like this will make them feel gratitude, love and appreciation.
Receiving Gifts
this person feels most loved when their partner gifts them with presents, the thought that you have them in mind when out and about is what makes them happy. this way of expressing love can seem shallow, however the gifts don’t need to be extravagant, women especially love receiving flowers which, on average are £3.50 from the grocery store.
written by magdalen manning
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Recipe No.2
Vegan Chilli
ingredients
3 tbsp olive oil
2 sweet potatoes, peeled and cut into medium chunks
2 tsp smoked paprika
2 tsp ground cumin
1 onion, chopped
2 carrots, chopped
2 celery sticks, chopped
2 garlic cloves, crushed
1-2 tsp chilli powder (depending on how hot you like it)
1 tsp dried oregano
1 tbsp tomato purée
1 red pepper, cut into chunks
2 x 400g cans chopped tomatoes
400g can black beans, drained
400g can kidney beans, drained
lime wedges, guacamole, rice and coriander to serve
Prep
heat the oven to 200C/180C fan/gas 6. put the sweet potato in a roasting tin and drizzle over 1½ tbsp oil, 1 tsp smoked paprika and 1 tsp ground cumin. give everything a good mix so that all the chunks are coated in spices, season with salt and pepper, then roast for 25 mins until cooked.
Cooking
meanwhile, heat the remaining oil in a large saucepan over a medium heat. add the onion, carrot and celery. cook for 8-10 mins, stirring occasionally until soft, then crush in the garlic and cook for 1 min more. add the remaining dried spices and tomato purée. give everything a good mix and cook for 1 min more.
add the red pepper, chopped tomatoes and 200ml water. bring the chilli to a boil, then simmer for 20 mins. tip in the beans and cook for another 10 mins before adding the sweet potato. season to taste then serve with lime wedges, guacamole, rice and coriander. will keep, in an airtight container in the freezer, for up to three months.
written by magdalen manning
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Cold Water Therapy
cold water is a fairly recent phenomenon which reaps several health benefits, both mental and physical, with many athletes, celebrities and health influencers all advertising it. there are several ways to go about cold water therapy, which i will outline in this post.
to try cold water therapy, or cold hydrotherapy, the temperature needs to be 15º in order to stimulate the health benefits. these benefits include, improved circulation, deepened sleep, a spike in energy levels, and reduced inflammation. likewise, scientists have added to the list of benefits from further research: less muscle soreness, faster cooldown if overheated, may ease symptoms of depression and boost the immune system, as well as being thought to boost your calorie-burning capacity.
to exercise cold water therapy, you can do a number of things:
practice warm-cold showers - start with warm water, then gently and gradually drop the temperature, or if after worked out you can skip the gradual turn down and go to straight to cold.
ice baths - immersing yourself in an ice bath for 10-15 minutes can especially help with muscle soreness, relaxing the nervous system and clearing the mind.
open water swimming - this can be especially healthy for the body, due to the swimming aspect. swimming exercises all muscle groups in the body, with open water swimming is better for the environment, and skin.
safety tips
before practising cold water therapy there are numerous safety aspects you should take into account, due to the effects on the body and emotions it is important to consult with your doctor first that cold water therapy is right for you, as well as preferably being accompanied. furthermore, ensure you have a heat source available after, dry off immediately, also sit down and have something to drink and eat, avoid having a hot shower as the sudden heat change could cause lightheadedness. lastly, keep immersions brief, and find what works best for you.
written by magdalen manning
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