nowimthebadguy

[nowimthebadguy]

Michelle Yeoh – The Rake Magazine 2023 Issue

#& portraits.

[nowimthebadguy]

#& musings.

[nowimthebadguy]

did i talk shit? absolutely.

#& musings.

[nowimthebadguy]

Lovely. She should have walked away before she was pulled into this conversation. Maude was a smart woman, you'd think shed be smart enough to know to avoid speaking to Bill at all costs. But here they were, and she still needed her coffee, so she wasn't about to leave. She was annoyed, but far too stubborn for that. "We have been just fine," she responded thin-lipped, unsure how to feel about her friend's name being tied to hers. On one hand, she was the least embarrassing person she'd met to be associated with. On the other, Maude didn't need to be associated with anyone; she was enough on her own. "Tell me, Bill, have you ever considered... how should I put this? Chilling out?" That was what the cool kids said these days, right?

"MAUDE!" his arms spread wide in greeting as he pivots to greet his (one-sided) pal, grin spreading from cheek to cheek. "HOW'VE YOU AND MAL BEEN?" those two have to be his favorite dastardly couple from the last decade! "AND I'M TRYING TO HURRY." bill turns back to the barista, eyes narrowing as the smile briefly slips – "MAKE THAT TWO CUPS AT TWO-TEN." and, his smile reappears as quickly as it faded as he once again faces maude. "IT'S ON ME!"

#she deserves to suffer #& chats. #& bill cipher.

[nowimthebadguy]

Maude surveyed them, wondering why they seemed nervous. Was there more to it than surface level? Perhaps she should have James check out the bathhouse to make sure nothing strange was going on. She kept her expression cool, though, having more than enough practice after raising Rapunzel to keep her emotions from appearing nonchalant.

"Tuesday works lovely for me," she smiled. "I'll be expecting you."

"Is that so?" Maude took the card between gloved fingertips, studying it carefully, as if she thought there was some sort of ulterior motive. There was always ulterior motive, it was just a matter of the how much it benefit her.

Now, Maude didn't care much about her business; it wasn't like it was a real source of income for her, nothing but a front. But she did like seeming important. "Alright," she stated after a moment. "Tell her she has a deal. Though I can't say my clients are always the most... respectable, unfortunately."

#& chats. #& haku kita.

[nowimthebadguy]

"Is that so?" Maude took the card between gloved fingertips, studying it carefully, as if she thought there was some sort of ulterior motive. There was always ulterior motive, it was just a matter of the how much it benefit her.

Now, Maude didn't care much about her business; it wasn't like it was a real source of income for her, nothing but a front. But she did like seeming important. "Alright," she stated after a moment. "Tell her she has a deal. Though I can't say my clients are always the most... respectable, unfortunately."

Haku smirked.

Shifting their weight, they gestured to the storefront behind them.

"My mistress is in need of referrals. She sent me to... extend an offer of mutual business," Haku explained.

He extended a business card, thick, creamy paper with royal blue ink swirled into a phone number.

"All she requests is that you send some of your clients her way once in a while, and she will exclusively purchase from Fountain of Youth for our bathhouse."

#& chats. #& haku kita.

[nowimthebadguy]

Michelle Yeoh for The Hollywood Reporter

#& portraits. #& when i was shipwrecked i thought of queue.

[nowimthebadguy]

Maude was not a patient woman, not in situations like these. When it came to her career, working on herself, kidnapping babies, she could plot and plan and take her sweet time to get the results she wanted. But waiting in line? She shouldn't have to wait in line, she should get a pass to skip all of them. She had earned it. "I cannot say I have," she remarked, using all of her self control to bite back another long sigh. "Perhaps you should hurry, lest you want a cup of that two-ten coffee down the front of your shirt."

"LOOK, KID, YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND – I NEED MY COFFEE TO BE TWO HUNDRED AND TEN DEGREES. NINETY-NINE CELSIUS. ALMOST HOT ENOUGH TO BOIL BUT NOT QUITE. THE PERFECT TEMP!" a scattered chorus of groans echoes behind him, but his gaze remains attached on the barista, deep bags hung beneath his eyes. "LOOK!" he flashes a badge from his pocket, noting access to evermore's local lab. "I'M A SCIENTIST. I KNOW WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT."

head tilting to the closest waiting customer, bill looks to them expectantly, brows raised. "HAVE YOU HAD COFFEE AT TWO-TEN BEFORE? YOU'D GET IT IF YOU HAD. IF OUR LOCAL BARISTA COOPERATES, I'LL EVEN LET YOU TRY IT! BUT YOU GOTTA CHUG!"

#& chats. #& bill cipher. #tw kidnapping

[nowimthebadguy]

"Pleasant enough," Maude mused, she didn't see much point to holidays. Maybe at one time they had been interesting but she had grown bored. They were nothing but an excuse for people to stress about all of the meaningless little things in their lives while preaching about family. Family. She scoffed at the thought.

"Don't bother with the pleasantries," she spoke again after a moment, her tone not rude but not... friendly. "Tell me, what are you here for?"

Haku smiled obligingly, both hands holding his tablet in front of him.

"It is very nice, madam," they replied, a genuine note in their voice. It was a beautiful piece of furniture, rivaling the massive fixture in Yubaba's office. They turned and nodded at the waiting room as well, taking mental notes on some elements that might look nice in the bathhouse as well.

"I trust you had a pleasant holiday?" they continued, searching for a casual segue into why they were here.

#& chats. #& haku kita. #& when i was shipwrecked i thought of queue.

[nowimthebadguy]

Adjusting the gloves on her hands, Maude stopped as she walked, curiosity getting the better of her when she saw Hades sitting alone; though she knew better than to be curious, sometimes even she couldn't help it. "Why so glum?" She wondered aloud, head tilted as she stared down at the man on the bench.

"You look as though someone died."

Hades held the gift loosely in his hand as he sat in one of the benches in the cemetery. "From Ayios Vassileios," he whispered, reading the tag on the side. "Happy Ephibany Santa Claus." Brushing his fingers against the flaps on the side taped down, playing with the idea of opening it to see what's inside. Instead he looked up against the silent night unsure of who'd left it behind, wondering if his family was out there. If they knew. If they cared.

"One day."

#tw death mention #& chats. #& hades aidoneus. #& when i was shipwrecked i thought of queue.

[nowimthebadguy]

Under normal circumstances, Maude would be rather annoyed someone spoke over her, offering her absolutely no respect — and to insult her taste, at that. But these were not normal circumstances. She was in a good mood and when she turned to fire off a snide remark, she caught the woman's gaze and time came to a halt. The eyes staring back at her weren't just any eyes; they were her own. Could it be? No. No, she couldn't entertain the thought, it was ridiculous. Still, Maude stared at her, the customer she'd been bragging to forgotten about entirely as they surveyed the room she'd previously been so absorbed in. How tacky some people become with age. The words echoed in the air, refusing to disperse, some sort of hidden meaning intertwined with them. "I'm sorry," she spoke, struggling to maintain her image momentarily, "do I know you?"

Cassandra stopped dead in her tracks when she heard that voice. Despite how many years it has been, a younger Cassandra knew that voice so deeply that it almost made her drop the coffee that was in her hands. She never really went around this place. She didn't have any need for this place. But how stupid of her and how cruel of life was it that the one thing, no, one person, she had sworn up and down was no longer living was here all this time? Now every single time Rapunzel or Eugene mentioned her name, it didn't seem like it was simple paranoia or deeply-rooted trauma. No. It couldn't be. It just...this couldn't be her.

She wasn't even speaking to Cass, but Cass wasn't going to just....not make herself known. So she tossed her coffee into the trash and properly entered Fountain of Youth, refusing to meet the eyes of the woman who's voice carried so loudly and so hauntingly that it interrupted her morning walk. She felt like a little kid again, that quickly. Interrupting her mother while she was boasting about herself. "I've seen better," she said finally, her voice carrying so much rage and so much hurt through the smallest amount of words. "Incredible how tacky some people become with age, right?"

#oh boi #& chats. #& cassandra gainey.

[nowimthebadguy]

"If only the rest of this miserable town would follow in my footsteps," she mused, turning away from the recently moved in furniture to look at him with pursed lips. Normally Maude would not take too kindly to someone asking for something, but assuming he managed to do his job well, he was an important person to keep in her corner. It had been too soon to brush him off. Besides, with Maude, flattery would get you everywhere. "Well, that depends entirely on the favor."

looking around, james nodded, slipping his hands into his pockets. he had learned that questioning maude was a waste of time. ❛ it does, ❜ he agreed, taking a few steps forward, surveying the waiting room with uninterested eyes. ❛ you've outdone yourself, maude, as per usual, ❜ he complimented, turning to look at her. his stoic expression didn't match the praise of his words as the real reason he was here distracted him. ❛ is it too soon in our partnership to ask you for a favor ?? ❜

#& chats. #& james hook.

[nowimthebadguy]

"Precisely." Maude's smile was friendlier than it was with most a she accepted Evelyn's invitation with a nod. She didn't have any other appointments this evening, and she wasn't worried about missing walk-ins if she decided to close up earlier than the sign on the door stated. "As long as you don't suggest somewhere like that disgusting grub place. Have you seen the pictures people post of their food? Nothing but overpriced crumbs of grease."

"Those are the ones who think they have a gorgeous face instead of a face only a mother could love." And not even every mother, Evelyn knew she'd be one of the harshest critics if she ever had kids. That's why she didn't. "Good. I can feel some lines starting to form on my forehead and that's when I know it's time to get the Botox re-upped." Plus, Maude was one of few people Evelyn could stomach around here. "Then I thought, we'd go get a drink, if you're free."

#& chats. #& evelyn deavor. #tw food mention

[nowimthebadguy]

"Shamefully, most of this town seems terrified to have any work done. It's always the ones that need it the most." She released a small sigh, twinged with disappointment. She could make millions off of this town, yet her schedule stayed practically empty. "Oh, now, don't you worry." The prettiest patients were walking advertisements, and while Maude didn't care too much about her business, she did care about her reputation. "You are always priority, dear."

"I must say, you've really outdone yourself." Evelyn smirked, waltzing through the waiting room as she made her way over to Maude's desk and the amply plush chairs that were on the opposite side of her. "You'll have to beat patients back with a stick. And I'll applaud you as you do it as long as they don't get in the way of my standing appointments." The woman didn't care all that much about her appearance as far as aging went but since science hadn't cracked immortality yet, she'd take what little procedures she could get to keep the wrinkles at bay.

#& chats. #& evelyn deavor.

[nowimthebadguy]

"Well, you must be quite talented then." Though she was only trying to come across as polite, Maude did believe it. Rapunzel was a very talented young woman. She could appreciate a creative mind when she saw one and when it came to the blonde's art, she made beautiful pieces. She'd had long enough to practice, hadn't she? At the words, enough mystery in a lifetime, her eyes flickered from Rapunzel to the crowd, trying not to let her gaze linger for too long, appear to suspicious as she studied her. It shouldn't be too hard to carry on a conversation behind the mask, to not give herself away. She'd hidden away for far too long to let herself be found out tonight. Even if she wasn't ready to scurry off into the crowd yet. "Well, then. He sounds like such a wonderful husband." The words tasted of iron, practically biting her tongue in two to avoid what she wanted to call him. If only Maude could dress them in satire without giving herself away. She didn't add anything for a moment, thinking her following statement through carefully. "As long as those aren't the only lies you have to worry about. Men," she shook her head, a breath of a sigh on her lips, "in my experience, you can never be too careful withholding trust from them."

at the inquiry of her craftsmanship, rapunzel nodded, bashful in the acceptance of the silent compliment that she believed to be interwoven in the question; ❛ oh yes, i... had a lot of hobbies growing up. sewing was one of them, though it's not my strongest skill by a mile. ❜ the blonde hummed, beaming; ❛ — thank you.❜ the flute of champagne found her lips once more, and she found herself sipping a bit desperately on it. her throat had gone dry, and the unease she had been feeling only amplified as their talking continued. rapunzel blamed it on nerves, something like that of stage fright, and swallowed thickly as she laughed once more — this time to fill the silence she was allowing to linger between pleasantries and conversation. ❛ not really, i've had enough mystery in my lifetime to be satisfied with it, ❜ rapunzel explained simply, shrugging a shoulder, her hand finding a bead on her gown and rolling it between fingers. maureen... rapunzel had never heard of a maureen in evermore before. mind you, she'd been here short of a year, still learning about the town she had once thought to be so small... but it didn't stop the electricity zipping through her. no, having a name only amplified it. the flute found her lips once more, her thirst increasing, downing the rest of its contents with a lack of poise before sheepishly setting it back down on the table. ❛ oh, eugene ?? ❜ rapunzel inquired, laughing, waving her hands dismissively. ❛ no, no, he's caught up in conversation and i'm sure he's thrilled to have a break from dancing. i'm not quite sure he enjoys it, though he'd never admit it, knowing how much i love it. ❜ her eyes flickered over to the man in question, a doting smile one her lips, before her gaze returned to maureen's— trying to read it through the framing of her unrevealing mask. her voice dropped to a playful whisper, even though eugene was well out of ear-shot. ❛ though, i find little lies like that to be harmless. even if he isn't being truthful, he dances with me anyways and smiles the whole time. ❜

#& chats. #& rapunzel gothel. #& masquerade 23. #1 million years later - hi

[nowimthebadguy]

"Pathetic," Maude agreed, it was actually embarrassing, the things people would do out of sheer loneliness and desperation, passing this whole event off like it was such a fun, cute little idea... when in reality they should be downright ashamed for thinking of it in the first place. "Oh, Malina. Do you know me at all?" Her lip curling at the thought of all of the horribly disgusting meals the families would be planning, all of their ridiculous holiday traditions, cheap gifts and thank yous, Maude shook her head after a moment, as if she really needed to answer in her own defense. Gloved fingers wound tightly around the stem of her champagne flute, she hesitated to bring it to her mouth, attention moving from the masked faces before them to her friend. "I only plan to be productive. Have I told you I've scheduled a makeover for the clinic?"

evermore masquerade ball ✧ @nowimthebadguy

❛ see that , maude ? mystery dates , the lot of them . ridiculous , ❜ not only was malina not particularly fond of people being loud and cheery for no actual reason , she also despised having to witness the madness . especially something as juvenile and naïve as mystery dates . ❛ imagine , purposefully signing up to cavort with someone you don't know and being excited for it . at this point , the people in this town are begging to be scammed . ❜ it certainly did make her feel even better about not being the most lawful citizen . perhaps being stuck in a hell hole such as evermore had it's perks ; no offense to hell , of course . ❛ please tell me your holiday plans include more than eating an oversized chicken , if you've made plans at all . ❜ needless to say holidays and family - oriented festivities weren't the faery's cup of tea .

#tw food #& chats. #& malina saleh. #& masquerade 23.

[nowimthebadguy]

LOCATION: fountain of youth FOR: open to all

"Doesn't it look divine?" Maude circled the new desk she'd been perched behind, gesturing to the now luxurious waiting room; a revamp dropped far too much money on over holiday break. She had it to spare, though, she could live off of interest alone. It was time she do something nice for herself... and her faux business. "Let me tell you, it was a much needed change. Worth every penny."

#evermorehqsstart #u don't have to be a customer #they could've walked into the wrong store idk sfjkhlfsjh #or misread the sign anything works #& chats.