So I guess I'm 'on my period' although I'm not bleeding much at all... Most I get is two drops when I wipe. I don't even wear a pad anymore cause blood refuses to come out as it used to.
I never even used to consider my period, but now that it's so unstable I'm very disappointed and angry whenever it's late or doesn't come at all for months at a time.
The most infuriating thing is that I've went to a gyno and a thyroid specialist and they both told me I'm 100% healthy. Sigh, guess it's just my bad freaking luck then.
Day 5: I want to lose weight because I want to feel more confident/comfortable in my own body. Also I've never been thin so im curious lmao. And yeah, I'm doing it for me, I don't give a shit about what anyone else thinks of me.
Day 4. Damn idk. I would say probably my greatest one is like... Loose skin. My mother has lost 50+kg and has a lot of loose skin and she talks badly about it all the time, so this has created so much negativity around that topic for me personally.
Next I would say stretch marks (yes you can get stretch marks from losing weight as well. I am experiencing it currently). Hair loss (I absolutely love my hair... Sigh) and perhaps brittle teeth and bones?
These fears of mine make me want to recover a lot.
Sooo today has been a disaster so far. Here's my food log:
For breakfast I had a small banana (90kcal) plus some 1.5% milk (48kcal) = 138 kcal
For lunch I had (unfortunately my mother was insisting I eat more with a concerned look) spaghetti (590 kcal) with beef sauce-ish (199kcal) and for salad pickled cucumbers (35kcal) =824
824+138= 962
I will not be eating ANYTHING ELSE cause my absolute limit is 1000 kcals... ✌️🥴
Manifesting this so i can have a crumb of happiness ✨✨
Bro I'm balling my eyes out rn.
My uncle came over and I was washing the dishes and he just said "have you lost weight? You look like a very pretty skinny girl." that's all I've ever wanted to hear in my life and its nice to know that all my hard work pays off somehow
I'm fucking *womens and queer rights being eradicated in the year 2021* this close to binging right now. I just had the worst day of my life. I'm fucking over everything rn.
This is my latest thinspir*tion, I had ones that inspired me more but I deleted them all 😬. I love their flat belly and thin legs. Also their beautiful arms cause I'm very ashamed of all of those parts on my body. Hopefully that will change 🤞