Tumgik
patchworkbeanie · 14 hours
Audio
Tumblr media
21K notes · View notes
patchworkbeanie · 4 days
Text
love the word “rapscallion”. like not only are you a rascal but you’re also kind of spring onion about it too
53K notes · View notes
patchworkbeanie · 7 days
Video
sorry to post facebook videos on main but the sound of jello going through an industrial shredder is both mesmerizing and horrible
151K notes · View notes
patchworkbeanie · 12 days
Text
vampirism poses the question "what if there was a fundamental, horrible, unending well of want in your soul that, if truly satisfied, would lead to great pain for all those you hold closest and, in turn, their absolute and total revilement of you?" and naturally as a person with no problems I don't relate to this in any way at all.
29K notes · View notes
patchworkbeanie · 28 days
Text
It's gonna be such a funny mess when Donald Trump dies of a stroke on April 1st, 2024.
Naturally everybody will think it's fake because of the date only to lose their minds (both positively and negatively based on their opinion of trump) when realizing it's real
There will be massive celebrations in the streets and on social media and lots of predictable "don't speak ill of the dead" discourse about those celebrations
Weird evangelicals will pull some weird number trick talking about how Jesus was conceived on April 1st and that makes Trump a sort of messiah and people will make fun of that
The Republicans (after they're done with the faux-sadness and faux-outrage) will stomp over each other to be his successor but none of them will succeed. They'll tear each other apart and have no single nominee for the November elections.
There will be discourse about if Biden and the living former presidents should go to his funeral (they won't, he was a traitor insurrectionist)
The Ukraine-Russia War immediately goes in favor of Ukraine as morale in the Kremlin is reduced. China similarly backs off from its threats on Taiwan.
Ten thousand new memes are made, some sticking around for years to come.
Not a month later a bunch of unofficial biographies of Trump hit the bookshelves, many with new details about just how awful he was.
158K notes · View notes
patchworkbeanie · 1 month
Text
71K notes · View notes
patchworkbeanie · 1 month
Text
Tumblr media
Tumblr media
Create your sdv character portrait here!😊
2K notes · View notes
patchworkbeanie · 1 month
Text
Today's Seal Is: Shrimple As That
Tumblr media
29K notes · View notes
patchworkbeanie · 1 month
Text
knife png to click and drag for your tumblr stabbing needs
Tumblr media
38K notes · View notes
patchworkbeanie · 1 month
Text
Tumblr media
83K notes · View notes
patchworkbeanie · 1 month
Text
you know what. fuck this shit (turns into a salmon and 𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟)
13K notes · View notes
patchworkbeanie · 2 months
Text
well fellas, it’s a LEAP YEAR, you know what that means! frog
50K notes · View notes
patchworkbeanie · 2 months
Text
31K notes · View notes
patchworkbeanie · 2 months
Text
my main goal
188K notes · View notes
patchworkbeanie · 2 months
Text
It's gonna be such a funny mess when Donald Trump dies of a stroke on April 1st, 2024.
Naturally everybody will think it's fake because of the date only to lose their minds (both positively and negatively based on their opinion of trump) when realizing it's real
There will be massive celebrations in the streets and on social media and lots of predictable "don't speak ill of the dead" discourse about those celebrations
Weird evangelicals will pull some weird number trick talking about how Jesus was conceived on April 1st and that makes Trump a sort of messiah and people will make fun of that
The Republicans (after they're done with the faux-sadness and faux-outrage) will stomp over each other to be his successor but none of them will succeed. They'll tear each other apart and have no single nominee for the November elections.
There will be discourse about if Biden and the living former presidents should go to his funeral (they won't, he was a traitor insurrectionist)
The Ukraine-Russia War immediately goes in favor of Ukraine as morale in the Kremlin is reduced. China similarly backs off from its threats on Taiwan.
Ten thousand new memes are made, some sticking around for years to come.
Not a month later a bunch of unofficial biographies of Trump hit the bookshelves, many with new details about just how awful he was.
158K notes · View notes
patchworkbeanie · 3 months
Text
watch this
965 notes · View notes
patchworkbeanie · 3 months
Text
hey girl are you gold and mercury. because. AuHg
56K notes · View notes