ponderingfey

[ponderingfey]

[ponderingfey]

In the forest. Värmland, Sweden.

[ponderingfey]

Blog #2

Mental Illness

What the doctor's pens say about me

I have been recently diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia. Exact same "illness" that my beloved cousin Dave Cooper Claire had.  

I feel so aligned and healthy yet the prescriptions indicate that something is "wrong" with me. Which is so silly.

I haven't been this mentally stimulated in a long time. I'm doing so many good things. I've activated my mind and sharpened my focus, my positive, and creative thoughts are flooding.

The relationship I have with my body has changed drastically over the past 5 years. At age 16 my eating disorders had me on track of dying before I turned 18. I fainted multiple times a day due to the fact that I was starving myself of the nutrients I needed to stay alive.  When I used to take prescriptions one of the side effects was losing my appetite. Not sure why someone with a PHD thought it was a good idea to put an anorexic on pills that took her hunger away. That's a recipe for disaster but then again a lot of disgraceful practices in western medicine. .

I used to set reminders on my phone that said "Don't eat."

I threw up after almost every meal. I hated myself. I didn't think I deserved to be alive. I thought no one would love me unless I was thin. My mindset was fucked.

Now as a 20 year old in 2019 I'm all about the body-positivity moment and accepting each others  beautiful equals.

Fast forward to today- I eat food that fuels my body in a positive way. I'm a vegan. I drink enough water. I have a sleep schedule that is consistent. I haven't purposely starved myself in over 3 years. Food is either medicine or poison.

That's why it's so important for me to be mindful of what I put on my plate. When I eat a lot of fast food or an entire pint of ice cream my body cries.

My waist is small, my stomach is flat, my legs are toned and strong, my skin is clear. Yet I STILL go through episodes where I'm so judgemental. I gained the body type that so many people think is perfect. Now my mind, body, and spirit is connected and is constantly healing.

Why are people so fearful? Trust in the positive side of life is the way to go.

You'll survive if you get a bad grade. You can move on after a break up. You can update your resume and get a new job. None of these things are going to literally kill you. Stop worryin' about it. As hippie sabotage preaches, 'live your life like you don't give a fuck cause i've been runnin' through this life and i can't get enough" \\

I close with some questions for your own reflection.

What are the voices in your head telling you?

What are they lying to you about?

What are they telling you to focus on?

Bring awareness to it. Talk to someone who's trustworthy and supportive about it (therapist are recommended) Take committed action to fix it.

That's one of the many recipes that will heal mental illness.

[ponderingfey]

Blog post #1: Fake Faces.

The Faces We Wear

A look at how we all can be fake

●Facade● (noun) an outward appearance that is maintained to conceal a less pleasant or credible reality.

We all do it. Even when we're being genuine and heartfelt. Even when we're trying to be open and honest. Even when we let ourselves be vulnerable. Let me give you some examples of how I personally distort my reality so people will accept me.

The public's perspective of me:

She's an influencer that writes really good instagram captions.

She travels.. so she must feel such a strong sense of satisfaction.. she must be rich in order to afford all that.

She dances, she must be so confident.

She wears clothing that's unique… she never struggles with insecurity.

She talks a little bit about her hardships.. but she's overcome them all.

She has so many cool friends.. she's lucky.

She meditates and does yoga.. is she ever stressed?

The reality of me:

my travels seemed cool but were an absolute nightmare to get through.

Most of my traveling has been paid for by other people.

I've never had a close friendship that lasted longer than a year, the fear of abandonment is so strong in the past I kept people at arm's length and left them at the first sign of trouble. My motto was "leave first so you can avoid the pain of being left."

I'm diagnosed as a paranoid schizophrenic.  

Being transparent is hard. I'm tempted to sugar coat it. Say something along the lines of "but being transparent is necessary! We ALL need to look at the faces we wear to hide what's really going on inside!" And yeah that's true but this blog isn't a place where I address a subject that needs awareness called to it and then actively demonstrates how I don't take my own advice.

Welcome to my blog. It's time to gain insight and clarity and if I have to wince as I hear my laptop keys click then so be it. If I have to open myself up to a community of people that follow me and deal with hateful comments, then so be it. I have a lot of very powerful things to say. Some are encouraging. Some are triggering. All of them are worth reading. My name is Noëlla Luna, but my friends call me Noël. It's time I dive into all the things that excite and terrify me. This blog is one of my many outlets for healing.

Thanks for peeping into my journey. If any of my blogs resonate with you, or maybe someone you know comes to mind that will benefit, share it with them.

This is a place of boundaries, honesty, no judgments, and vulnerability.

Today, I challenge you to ask yourself:

"what faces do I wear to keep people from seeing the real me?"

#blogs #healing

[ponderingfey]

Essential Oils for Psychic Ability Enhancement

You should always read the labels of your oils and heed any warnings, and properly dilute them before using them on your skin.

Cinnamon Essential Oil can be used to stimulate visions, strengthen focus, and promote healing and harmony. Aids in connecting with guides.

Lavender  Essential Oil Aids in mediation, and stimulates dream recall and clairvoyance. It also opens third-eye while protecting and purifying.

Patchouli  Essential Oil can be used to help with grounding. It dispels negativity and stimulates spiritual growth. It is most commonly the preferred oil divination.

Peppermint Essential Oil can be used to increase spiritual energy and heighten psychic awareness.

Rosemary  Essential Oil can be used to promote visions, creativity, and recall a past life. It dispels negativity and is also considered a psychic stimulant. It opens the third eye as well.

Jasmine  Essential Oil Balancing, inspiring, sensual. Attracts love, romance and sex. Stimulates psychic dreams, astral projection, creativity and visions. Encourages compassion and transcendence. Aids in meditation.

Sandalwood  Essential Oil Purifying, protective, healing. Good for meditation, astral projection, manifesting, blessings, house cleansings and releasing the past. Dispels negativity.

Frankincense Essential Oil Uplifting, balancing, purifying, protective. Good for meditation and connecting with guides. Promotes enlightenment, multidimensional awareness.

[ponderingfey]

Money spell! Reblog to charge it with your intent; the more people see it, the more powerful it becomes. Magic should be fun!

[ponderingfey]

other girls: respectable hut at the edge of the village, uncursing wells, turning into a black cat to steal into a tyrant’s bedchambers and assassinate him in his sleep

me: no familiar, crushing my herbs with a rock i picked up outside, trying to make casual conversation with crows but they keep predicting my death instead

[ponderingfey]

[ponderingfey]

Witch tip

Being outside on a windy day is a good way to cleanse yourself. Visualize the wind passing through you and carrying away any negative energy clinging to you.

[ponderingfey]

[ponderingfey]

Indepth Look at Astrology

WRITTEN BY ZODIAC SOCIETY || THEZODIACSOCIETY.COM

MEANING OF EACH PLANETS: think of the planets as a body part of a person

 SUN: keywords: ego, essence, identity, spirit, light, consciousness, the self, style, purpose.

 MOON: keywords: soul, moods, emotions, home, habits, instinct, intuition, security, needs, safety, comfort.

MERCURY: keywords: mind, intellect, communications, perception, awareness, dexterity, the body’s nervous system. 

VENUS: keywords: love, romance, sensuality, art, aesthetics, beauty, sociability, the female energy. 

MARS:  action, will, initiative, energy, strength, courage, impulses, desires, stamina, conflict, the male energy. 

JUPITER: keywords: wisdom, expansion, benefits, generosity, luck, opportunity, improvements.

SATURN: keywords: effort, responsibility, restrictions, seriousness, stability, endurance, maturity, discipline, lessons. 

URANUS: keywords: rebellion, independence, changing, spontaneity, reform, inventiveness, higher intellect, eccentricity, creative will.

NEPTUNE: keywords: inspiration, unconditional love, spirituality, idealism, faith, elusive, illusions, imagination, strength of spirit, ease, self-deceit.

PLUTO: keywords: transformation, destruction, regeneration, obsession, cleansing, healing, elimination, transmutation, coercion, control.

Keep reading

[ponderingfey]

Simple Morning Rituals

Brew your tea or coffee, and say a little blessing over it. You could add an intent for the day to boost your likelihood of actually doing it. Stir in sweetener/creamer clockwise to gain positivity, and stir counterclockwise to banish laziness, negative thoughts, etc..

Go outside and meditate on your front porch. Think of how new the day is, and the fact that this 24 hours has never been experienced before. Allow yourself to be refreshed and renewed.

Light a tealight or small candle and grab a fireproof container. Come up with a good sigil to focus on for the day. Burn it and pretend you never even thought about it. Haha what sigil?Alternatively, make a sigil and empower it through the day. Burn or dispose of it when you feel accomplished.

Splash your face with water after you bless it. It feels really good to be purified from energy-filled water, and you can charge it how ever you like. You can make it a gem elixir, a bowl of moon water, sun water, rose water… the possibilities are endless.

Braid your hair if it’s long, and fill each knot with a specific energy. Confidence, love, power. Whenever you feel like you’re lacking this energy, unbraid your hair. If your hair is short, simply put bobby pins somewhere inconspicuous and pull them out for a boost. If you don’t have any hair, put stickers or gems on the nape of your neck where they won’t be visible pull them off accordingly.

[ponderingfey]

Actions in Witchcraft

Just like each herb and crystal has certain properties and strength, so do actions taken during rituals and spells. When writing spells it is important to include the proper actions to make sure your spell is as effective as possible.

Burning - Burning an object is a common practice in spells and rituals. Fire is considered a cleansing and activating force.

If you want to destroy something’s influence, burn it and dispose of the ashes away from your home.

If you want to set something into motion, burn objects related to the situation to ash.

If you want to activate certain energies, burn objects related to those involved.

If you are performing a curse or hex, burn the object in the flame of a candle.

Burying/Abandoning - A Witch might bury and object for many reasons. They might want to put something to rest, perform a slow spell, or banish something. There are different ways in which one can bury an object to accomplish a desired outcome:

If you want to keep something close, bury the object in your back yard.

If you want to attract something, bury the object under the front door step

If you want to disperse something to a distance, throw the object into a crossroads

If you want to fix an influence, inter the object in a five-spot pattern

If you want something to work by means of spirits, bury the object in a graveyard (but don’t disrupt those buried there!)

If you want to hide something’s point of origin, conceal the object in a tree

If you want something/someone to work by stealth, hide the object in clothing or on objects

If you want an influence to begin or strengthen, throw the object East

If you want an influence to end or weaken, throw the object West

Rubbing - Rubbing an object can be the easiest and most immediate way to experience witchcraft. Transferring and garnering energy from objects can be done through physical contact with an object.

If you want to put energy into an object, rub it with your left hand

If you want to gather energy from an object, rub it with your right hand

If you want to bring positivity, rub clockwise

If you want to bring negativity, rub counter clockwise

If you want to use crystals to heal, rub the appropriate stone on the effected part of the body.

Soaking - Water is one of the main elements used in witchcraft. It comes in many forms with many different properties and uses.

If you want something to move away and sink, throw it in running water

If you want something’s influence to rise and fall cyclically, float it in a tidal estuary

If you want to protect or cleanse something, soak an object in rain water

If you are focused on your personal goals, soak your object in sea water

If you want to bring about transformation, soak your object in snow/melted snow

If you’re trying to make a wish come true, soak your object in well water

If you want to banish, soak your object in harbor water

[ponderingfey]

Beauty of Skyrim

[ponderingfey]

Bath Potions

I just wanted to make a simpler post on how to make shower gel spells. They look really pretty and are fun to make and practical cause you can use them any time. Here is a few pictures of mine. (another)

I make these spells to either:

Evoke a feeling, put me in a mental state (state of calm, state of clarity, state of alertness to wake up)

Attract Something (friends, money, good energy)

Banish Something (sheilding, etc)

There’s a lot of other intentions you could do but those tend to be my top 3.

They also look like cute colorful potions and make the bathroom feel more magical.. Aside from the brass cauldron full of drying bath mixes and glitter and powder and strange shit everywhere.

You will need

A bottle of your choice! Glass is the best because it doesn’t leak into the formula and you can reuse it. Squeezy plastic bottles are ok too but glass is preferred. You can get the cool potion-looking bottles at Michaels, Hobby lobby, AC Moore, Goodwill, wherever. They usually cost $1 each. (Usually $1.50 if they are large). If you do buy a glass bottle they have a lot of different shapes and sizes. I use square shapes for protection or stability, round for different mental states or energy, hearts for self love, compassion or attracting love or social interactions, I mean there are many shapes so keep in mind what type of bottle you would like for what spell. If you don’t want to get that complicated then just get the most plain glass bottle possible lol.

 Scentless gel soap. You can get pure liquid castille soap at a few stores, many people love this. I just get a $4 whole foods scentless shower gel brand that works nicely. They used to have this amazing shower gel that was so soft and wonderful at whole foods and I can no longer find it, but it’s called Shikai and it makes your skin feel like angels rubbed themselves on it. I have no idea why I can’t find it anymore.

 (Optional) Oils for the skin. Some oils has its own magical properties but adding argan oil, coconut oil, aloe (not oil, but good for the skin) or olive oil in small teaspoons can help to moisturize the skin or give it a nice glow. Coconut oil is fun cause it separates and leaves a cool milky layer on top and when you shake it the solution is thick and creamy.

Essential oils, fragrance oils, your favorite perfume, flower water, for fragrance. Anything that will help to evoke the feeling or magic you would want. This is a very basic instruction post so its very open ended. Just ingredients for the fragrance. 

Ingredients to help further evoke this magic:  dried herbs, petals, rain water, snow water, crushed ice, decorative glass pearls, seashells, citrus peels, seeds, your breath, eyelashes, black sand, colorful sand, charcoal (great for protection and extracting crap from the skin), home made flower or herb extracts and oils, (great seasonal activity to make fragrance oils from collected flowers and herbs outside), etc. You understand the point. Things that you collect in your craft that’s safe to go on skin and has magical properties. For things like crystals that don’t do well in these types of solutions, use them to charge your solution afterwards by placing them around or on top of the cork.

Optional: Things to give it some presentation such as food coloring, mica powder, glitter (some I have stars or heart shaped glitter in it, its cute and the glitter is too heavy so it rinses off of me).

Your Intent (of course!) When you have all your ingredients gathered in your bottle, they will naturally be separated since oils and shower gel have different weights and textures. When you shake it together fusing them for the first time, make sure your intent is strong, Maybe meditate or take time to focus your energy before doing this!

You can use these things when you need them daily in the shower (High five to those super busy or low energy witches who don’t have the time or energy to do magic everyday!) Usually this can last up to two weeks or if you have multiple, it can last for months so you can feel magical daily by just taking a quick shower with this, plus its way easier than making a bath and using bath salt mixtures (-also to add, I understand sometimes people with low energy have trouble even getting into a shower but when I was in a rush sometimes I would just wash my hands with a solution and feel great). If you have more time you can pour the whole bottle into a bubble bath! So it works as something for the shower and for a bath! Adding baking soda makes a SUPER foamy fizzing bath. So if you ever need a magical bubble bath you got a cute potion bottle sitting ready to go. They are easy and once you get the hang of making them it becomes really fun too!

I have made rejuvenation/calming potions with mint leaves and rain water (colored it a soft green, added light green pearl dust powder)

potions to evoke a clear mind with eucalyptus, rain water and sandalwood

potions for confidence with honeysuckle, gold glitter, and amber (colored it a deep blue for the throat energy to communicate well). 

potions for social attractiveness and attracting good vibes with cherry blossom home made oil and pink heart glitter and sugar fragrance

And then its fun to give them names and write down the recipes in your grimoire (which I have been neglecting to do), usually when I don’t have a name I just call them by what they do like Rejuvination I, Confidence, Clarity, and when I do have a name usually based on how they look and smell I named one Sunburst and the cherry Blossom one Sugar Blossom cause it smells like spring flowers and baked sweets.

I’ve gotten some compliments from this too. Like I have used shower gels to attract friendships or social interactions and people would notice there is an alluring smell and ask about it then I would be like: OH DID YOU MEAN ME?!?! Cause you know, I love it when I smell good ;)  (Also I am a Libra attention seeking ho in social situations)

Anyway I hope this helps. Shoot me questions if you need them to be answered!

[ponderingfey]

[ponderingfey]

…At night I dream that you and I are two plants that grew together, roots entwined

Pablo Neruda, “Rain (Rapa Nui)” (via thelovejournals)