revelale

[revelale]

𝐨𝐛𝐬𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐞 𝐬𝐨𝐫𝐫𝐨𝐰𝐬 𝐝𝐫𝐚𝐛𝐛𝐥𝐞 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐭𝐬.

a collection of words to describe the strangeness of being human.

✧ agnosthesia: the state of not knowing how you really feel about something.

✧ alazia: the fear that you're no longer able to change.

✧ altschmerz: a sense of weariness with the same old problems that you've always had, the same boring issues and anxieties you've been gnawing on for decades.

✧ apolytus: the moment you realize you are changing as a person, finally outgrowing your old problems like a reptile shedding its skin.

✧ bareleveling: trying to improve yourself without anyone else knowing about it, afraid that they'll think it's silly or grandiose or unnecessary, or that they'll end up calling too much attention to your efforts.

✧ bye-over: the sheepish casual vibe between two people who've shared an emotional farewell but then unexpectedly have a little extra time together.

✧ candling: the habit of taking stock of your life on the occasion of your birthday.

✧ craxis: the unease of knowing how quickly your circumstances could change on you.

✧ daguerreologue: an imaginary conversation with an old photo of yourself, in which you might offer them a word of advice, or maybe just ask them if they thought you had done justice to the life they built for you.

✧ dead reckoning: finding yourself bothered by somebody's death more than you would have expected, even if they were only an abstract presence in your life.

✧ dolonia: a state of unease prompted by people who seem to like you too much, which makes you wonder if they must have you confused with someone else.

✧ endzoned: the hollow feeling of having gotten exactly what you thought you wanted, only to learn that it didn't make you happy.

✧ énouement: the bittersweetness of having arrived here in the future, finally learning the answers to how things turned out but being unable to tell your past self.

✧ etterath: the feeling of emptiness after a long and arduous process is finally complete.

✧ falesia: the disquieting awareness that someone's importance to you and your importance to them may not necessarily match.

✧ feresy: the fear that your partner is changing in ways you don't understand, even though they might be changes for the better.

✧ fool's guilt: a pulse of shame you feel even though you've done nothing wrong.

✧ harmonoia: an itchy sense of dread when life feels just a hint too peaceful, with an eerie stillness that makes you want to brace for the inevitable collapse, or burn it down yourself.

✧ heartspur: an unexpected surge of emotion in response to a seemingly innocuous trigger, which feels all the more intense because you can't quite pin it down.

✧ immerensis: the maddening inability to understand the reasons why someone loves you.

✧ inerrata: a kind of mistake you wouldn't take back even if you could.

✧ insoucism: the inability to decide how much sympathy your situation really deserves, knowing that so many people have it far worse and others far better.

✧ justing: the habit of telling yourself that just one tweak could solve all of your problems, which leaves you feeling perpetually on the cusp of a better life.

✧ kairosclerosis: the moment you look around and realize that you're currently happy, which prompts your intellect to identify it, pick it apart, and put it in context.

✧ keep: an important part of your personality that others seldom see, that remains a vital part of who you are even if nobody knows it's there.

✧ kuebiko: a state of exhaustion inspired by senseless tragedies and acts of violence, which force you to abruptly revise your expectations of what can happen in this world.

✧ lackout: the sudden awareness that you're finally over someone, noticing that the same voice that once triggered a cocktail of emotions now evokes nothing at all.

✧ leidenfreude: a sense of paradoxical relief when something bad happens to you.

✧ liberosis: the desire to care less about things.

✧ lyssamania: the irrational fear that someone you know is angry with you.

✧ mauerbauertraurigkeit: the inexplicable urge to push people away, even close friends whose company you generally enjoy.

✧ mcfeely: to be inexplicably moved by predictable and well-worn sentiments, even if they're trite or obvious or being broadcast blindly to the masses.

✧ nachlophobia: the fear that your deepest connections with people are ultimately pretty shallow.

✧ nighthawk: a recurring thought that only seems to strike you late at night.

✧ opia: the ambiguous intensity of looking someone in the eye, which can feel simultaneously invasive and vulnerable.

✧ ozurie: the feeling of being torn between the life you want and the life you have.

✧ pâro: the feeling that everything you do is always somehow wrong.

✧ povism: the frustration of being stuck inside your own head, unable to see your face or read your body language in context, only ever guessing how you might be coming across.

✧ proluctance: the paradoxical urge to avoid doing something you've been looking forward to, stretching out the bliss of anticipation as long as you can.

✧ punt kick: a quiet jolt of recognition that it's time to become a better version of yourself, sensing that all the strategies that brought you this far are no longer working.

✧ rasque: a moment you instantly wish you could take back, feeling a pulse of dread right after crossing the point of no return.

✧ rubatosis: the unsettling awareness of your own heartbeat.

✧ scabulous: being proud of a certain scar on your body, even if it hurts.

✧ slipfast: the longing to disappear completely, so you can take in the world without having to take part in it.

✧ soufrise: the maddening thrill of an ambiguous flirtation, which quivers in tension halfway between platonic and romantic.

✧ tiris: the bittersweet awareness that all things must end.

✧ the whipgraft delusion: the phenomenon in which you catch your reflection in the mirror and get the sense that you're peering into the eyes of a stranger.

✧ tichloch: the anxiety of never knowing how much time you have left.

✧ tornomov: the weird hollowness of trying to imagine the distant future.

✧ yu yi: the longing to feel things intensely again.

#✞ ` ‣ 【 ASKBOX 】 #yes i still have asks to reply to yes i still want to do this one when i can

[revelale]

peerlessscowl:

Raven was a man that was used to being told no. It had littered his entire life, from one direction or another, and of varying intensities. Most times, he didn't find himself getting too riled over it – better things to do, more important things to focus on – but there were times when it grated. 

At first, this was not one of those times, but as the two guards continued to snicker, and the cleric beside him audibly voiced his disdain for the misunderstanding, Raven felt a tick in his jaw begin to form. 

"Yeah," he replied, thoughtfully casting his gaze a bit further down the road where the wall extended. "Hard to believe they saw through us." 

Then, flicking his eyes back to the guards he held their stare for a moment in inscrutable silence, causing the snickers to stop as they shifted into a more alert stance, grips tightening on their spears as they prepared for a fight; "Sorry for the trouble. Excuse us." 

He bowed slightly, stiff-backed, and as he rose it was hard to see the gentle curve that tugged one corner of his lips upward, especially as he swiveled in his stride and began to make his way back onto the path from where he and the clergyman had come, expecting the other to follow. 

He walked in silence for a moment before they'd reached a fair distance away from the outpost, and Raven shifted his focus to the wall in earnest – assessing the structure's height, strength, the distance that the guard outpost was from where they stood, and listening sharply for any sound of movement on the other side. 

Nodding, satisfied, he turned to the cleric and met his eye – if he seemed irritable before, it was easy to notice the shift in his demeanor to amused. 

"Doesn't seem too heavily fortified. Think we can break in?" 

At the very least, it would shorten their trudge home by many hours. Perhaps even allow them the opportunity to purchase a horse, or, if the saints were kind, new pants. 

the proposition seemed to have lifted his spirits. with a wordless bow on his own part, pandreo made his tactical retreat alongside raymond to where they'd first spied the outpost in the first place. he doesn't know what it was about it that seemed to have cheered him up. maybe it was because there was a new target for his frustrations, or because entering this way was all but the last barrier that lay between him and his dignity being restored. he wasn't going to question it. at the question, the priest all but shrugs as he takes another glance at the surrounding walls.

it was just the two of them, so it would've been reasonably easy to sneak in without getting noticed. stone, at a glance. probably a long-time outpost that'd probably served its purpose at some by-gone war, but that'd make it easier for either of them to get a foothold without having to vault one another over the ramparts. there was little activity there and he reasons that the two guards at the front were usually enough to dissuade the worst of the intruders, though he doesn't doubt the outpost likely houses at least a dozen more in the event of an invasion proper.

it'd be more of a question of being spotted while they were on the opposite side.

it wasn't exactly easy to hide that they would be scaling the walls, and there was no sure way of knowing they'd have cover on the interior. "i've snuck into places with harder security. easy." pointing out he'd done so on a party boat to lythos probably wouldn't be as appealing, though.

but, he wonders if they'd be better off taking their chances with making their way to something less watched. "what do you say we check out if they've got stables on the outside?" it wasn't as though they'd checked the entire perimeter, and it seemed unlikely that they would've kept the horses on the interior. outright stupid, he might argue, if they built the joint with only one entry and one exit point. what were the odds that they'd have a handful of knights or guards bumming it around there? it'd be easier to convince a stable boy to lend them some pants too, right?

"it might be an easier way in." a pause, "or out."  

@peerlessscowl

FEAR AND LOATHING ALONG THE AIRMID

#peerlessscowl #✞ ` ‣ 【 THREAD ; FEAR AND LOATHING ALONG THE AIRMID 】 #had to move this over to a beta post too hoohoo! #LET'S STEAL A STABLE BOY'S PANTS ....... OR HIS HONSES #i lost my train of thought half way through this i'm so sorry #let me know if i need to make edits!!!!!!

[revelale]

daeificatio:

Byleth leaned back slightly, feeling his personal space get temporarily invaded with how close the other guy got before straightening back into place and going back to the pouches with herbs before them. “Hi.” He started. “And no.” He finished.

Indeed, no instructions were given as to how they’d prepare those herbs. Most likely because the infirmary team itself…most likely didn’t know how to prepare them either. Probably this influx of injuries was faster than their research department, who knows. “I assume we just need to ground them into a paste. Or eat them whole.” Cobalt eyes flicked back to the book he discarded earlier. “The book is useless.” Of course it was, otherwise the team would be using it to get to know those herbs. They weren’t documented yet.

The professor reached out for a pair of leaves, carefully inspecting them. “Priest, okay.” So, the other male was a priest. Didn’t look like one. 

“I am a teacher.” It was only then that Byleth noticed how weird this question had been. With a quick comment from Sothis in his mind, he brought the leaf near his nose to smell it. No particular smell, just very leafy. “I teach sword and faith.” After a brief pause, Byleth popped the leaf inside his mouth and started to chew on it. “And survival.” Chewing on herbs wasn’t new to him- after all, mercenary bands rarely ever managed to get in contact with actual doctors, having to instead rely on their own knowledge on how to treat injuries or, if lucky, recruit someone who knew healing magic.

“If you are a priest,” He continued to chew. The taste was unremarkable. “Don’t you know about faith magic? Shouldn’t you be healing the stud-” Calm and monotone, as if they were discussing the weather, but Byleth paused as if his brain had suddenly frozen in place. To those watching from a distance, one could mistake the professor simply pausing to think about something or recall a memory- but no. Though his face was still rather blank and his eyes seemed aloof as ever, something in them had changed.

The smallest glint of absolute suffering. 

When he grabbed that leaf, Byleth assumed it would be just your average slightly bitter herb to contain headaches and other simple bouts of pain. He didn’t think however that this portion of leafy goods would numb pain by gracing him with one of the most rancid tastes he had ever had the displeasure to face.

A slow, dragged intake of breath as he quickly grabbed a vial of water and drank the entire thing in one swift go. Shit, the aftertaste was strong. With quick blinks, Byleth kept his composure in check.Grabbing a small slip of paper, he noted it down. “It numbs pain, but it’s more preferable to stay in pain if this is the medication.

The paper read: “tastes horrible”

from the quick exchange, pandreo's learned exactly one thing: the guy's pretty terse. he keeps his answers short, but seems willingly enough to at least entertain conversation where necessary. "that's probably a safe assumption, sure," he answers in turn, watching the man cycle through the process with what seemed to be little regard for the process. "i'm assuming some of them should be made into a tincture. maybe boiled into a tea or something similar." he'd heard of a few folk remedies that worked the same way. but, those needed to be tested and checked instead of being taken at their face value alone. 

testing meant that they weren't exactly sure what exactly all these herbs were for and or what the consequences of them would be. there was a fine line between poison and medicine and his patient smile turns a little more reluctant then into complete bewilderment—"wait! don't just put it in your m—yyyyou ate it. alright."

sure.

why not. 

scanning for any signs of the herb so far backfiring, pandreo notes down the possibility for a delayed reaction in his head before scrambling to cut in another reply as to why he was helping with this as opposed to outright casting healing magic before the man just stops talking altogether. "hello?" should he snap his fingers in his face? it'd be pretty rude of him to do so, and the rational part of his brain leaps to the next conclusion. golden eyes fixate on the other's vacant expression, watching for the potential change in color of his lips or for his pupils to abruptly lose focus. he even stops to hover a hand in front of the professor's mouth and check that he was still breathing. ( good news, he was! ) proven all the more so when he speaks again. "did it numb your tongue or something there?"

"it doesn't have to all be taken by mouth. we can just turn it into a poultice too. but, uh." pandreo slowly slides the tray of potential candidates over toward his side, then searches for the abandoned book. "maybe you don't just things in your mouth, huh, big guy? can i get you a juice or something?" did that sound condescending? it was how he used to get panette to take her medicine as a kid. it seemed like an apt response here too. picking up another flowering herb, he gestures toward the book before directing the professor's attention back toward the lone sheet of paper where he'd written down that it tasted terrible. "maybe we can just, lick it or something."

@daeificatio

damn bro u teach like this? | m!byleth & pandreo

#daeificatio #✞ ` ‣ 【 THREAD ; DAMN BRO U TEACH LIKE THIS? 】 #ok i had to move this bc legacy and beta edits are no longer simpatico lmfao #pandreo continues to be bewildered by this man

[revelale]

he's never really understood themed parties. it's not that he hates them or anything. he just doesn't really get it. isn't it kind of a pain to have to dress and decorate to theme? but when he steps through the threshold unto the so-called night opera, pandreo thinks that he almost understands it. it's undeniably impressive. his head cranes back as he turns his eyes toward the vaulted ceilings, the spiraling staircases and the polished white stone underfoot looks as though it were made of a million and one pearls crushed into starlight.

an undeniably ostentatious display for an audience of none, save the few that'd been granted an invitation as neat and nonspecific as his own. ' you will arrive precisely where your presence is required, ' and pandreo's smile settles into his cheek.

the priest silently bids the urgent need to say something about the showmanship ( or lack thereof ) of it all farewell. he'd been granted free reign of the space for the time-being. so long as he remained within the periphery until the last cast member were to arrive. he'd half-expected a script to be handed off by now from what he'd heard in way of explanation from the rumors and from the last stagehand he'd been handed off from, but it never arrives. neither does a costume, though one advises sternly that he tie back his hair to keep it from getting in the way.

that advice is well-taken, and he busies himself with merely observing the space and the stage before he's retrieved and ushered backstage by a different stagehand this time. the woman dons a proper tailcoat and a mask and whispers to him as though she is keeping a secret: ' the other actors have arrived. '

at a glance, he doesn't spy actors as much as it is actor, and he smiles calmly in the direction of a stranger that is not quite a stranger. he's seen this face before, even if he doesn't quite know the name of the person who possesses it. "between you and the staff here," a glance back to meet the gaze of a different stagehand, newly possessed by the desire to costume him now, before he turns back toward the other performer. "i think i'm pretty underdressed for this whole thing!" at least he had the good sense to not wear his robes. could you imagine?

"the invitation didn't give a dress code, or i wouldn't have shown up with sandals."

The Night Opera

#laslow #✞ ` ‣ 【 THREAD ; THE NIGHT OPERA 】 #if you're ripping off the night circus i have no idea what i'm ripping off of #this is so much random exposition i'm so sorrY Y y y y Y

[revelale]

@atefirom:

They say if you go to the sauna completely alone at night, and get the room full of steam, you’ll see your doppelgänger in the mist. If you don’t defeat your doppelganger, or escape before it can catch you, your doppelganger will take your place! Or… Maybe it’s just someone else using the sauna… [Grants Gauntlet +1]

he doesn't really care a ton about the rumors. there's plenty of them and plenty more that he's been sent to chase after because he's probably one of the freest ( freer? ) members of the faculty. in between the missions that they were usually dispatched on, the students had more than enough time to invent something new. the flavor of the month this time seems to be a doppelganger when you go late at night, but doppelgangers be damned: what would it see that it hasn't already?

whistling as he made his way toward the sauna with a towel draped over his shoulder, pandreo made his way into the preceding dressing room where—after taking a quick glance around the room to double check no one else was there to have to bear witness—he abandons his vestments in favor of a pair of swim trunks.

"what in the divine one's?! i've got to get out more."

this was probably the most obvious reason for why he was waltzing to the sauna at this late hour. pandreo twists and turns, examining his torso before gaze drops down to his legs. wouldn't you come this late if you were in the position of suspecting that pretty much everything neck down was basically translucent? he was almost confident that he could comfortably blend into the receding snow from the blizzard. "maybe i can convince them into introducing summer robes." shorts?

or, maybe whatever it was that princess céline had going on.

party in the front, business in the back.

shrugging, he folds his clothes, grabs a towel and makes his way into the steam-filled room with little more preamble. and though he doesn't clock the other tangerine head in the room, he does think it's odd that his reflection would have such perfectly tame hair. humidity usually made his worse. not much of a doppelganger if you asked him!

SAUNA WARS: THE SWEAT RETURNS

#atefirom #✞ ` ‣ 【 THREAD ; SAUNA WARS: THE SWEAT RETURNS 】 #im sorry i thought this was a funny thread title #lmk if i need to give you more to work with!!!!!!! #ik it's mostly expositional set up so njlnjkKJ

[revelale]

pandreo mario and panette mario

#✞ ` ‣ 【 SELF ; 】 #TIS THE SEASON.......

[revelale]

"it better be!" he could probably to go back and grab more things, but the chances of that going well seemed pretty slim. he doesn't know how no one woke up when he nearly dropped everything on the way over. but, pandreo would be glad for it, whatever the reason. the blanket is thankfully big enough when the two of them manage to navigate their way around the wyvern to cover some surface area.

unfurling the second, he tosses its opposite end over to rosado and steps around the floor to continue bundling carmilla up as best they can. "stable's good!" he offers supportively, as a sideways glance catches rosado frowning.

it was all the difference between stable and life-threatening when you really thought about it. the optimistic, and he was, might've viewed it as someone on the mend. the pessimistic, ah—it was hard to be anything but when you were the one worrying, huh? he might've not understood what it was like to be worried about a wyvern, but he knew if it had been fogado or bunet or, hell, god forbid if it was panette—no amount of comfort would've helped. but, pandreo tries anyway.

"hey, she'll," and he thinks to pat rosado on the shoulder until he realizes about halfway through making the gesture that he's on the complete opposite side of the room, so his hand just hovers awkwardly midair, "she'll be okay; don't worry. she'll be ruining my hair before you even know it." the second blanket is laid flat, and he thinks about retrieving the third before the question of the kitchen returns him to the smell he'd been desperately trying to ignore since he'd arrived.

he didn't know if she had a preference for cooked or raw meat and he was sincerely banking on the latter. the only option for the former would've involved him skewering it on a stick and standing outside in the hallway with a fire spell and a prayer in to the divine one that it'd be more of a rotisserie situation than burnt beyond recognition.

"i wasn't really sure what to grab for her. no chance on arugula. s'out of season, but one of the hunters found an animal of unidentifiable origin that i'm pretty sure was supposed to be dinner and, uh, also someone's fish." he holds a hand up to stop rosado preemptively, shaking his head. "don't ask me who's; i have no idea. i thought light meats might be her thing."

✩ . MY PRIEST-BOO IS ALL I NEED

#rozyrne #✞ ` ‣ 【 THREAD ; MY PRIEST-BOO IS ALL I NEED 】

[revelale]

"i presume a lot of things. that's our prerogative here at the monastery. no one told you?" unsolicited judgment was also part of the job. not that he was going to go around telling people how to go and live their lives, even as much as he expects the rest of the clergy—seemingly infinite in their disparities between this and other gods—to. something something, they were raised with the doctrines of goodness or what have you. "but i could call you madam celica if you'd like."

"don't tell me you're a dowager."

at least, he thinks that's the right word for that.

but at the mention of growing up, pandreo's grin falters the tiniest bit. he might not know the exact circumstances, but it's funny how people always use the same words to describe the same thing. he grew up fast too. so did panette, though he thinks his sister might've come around to it much faster than he had.

"no offense taken, my lady," he has to resist the urge to add ' princess ' or queen before her name because this celica hasn't told him which, and he doesn't claim to know from what point her experience had been replicated for the emblems. "i'd rather hear that than be told i'm showing my age." though, just at a glance, he feels it's safe to assume he can't be much older than her if he was at all. pandreo was really out here putting the youth in youth pastor.

the twitch of a more rueful smile from before disappears.

as his arm falls back to his side, pandreo 'hms' at her question before shaking his head. "oh. no, i was just messing around," and he has to bite back adding princess because this celica hasn't told him that she was. "they keep the place pretty clean and i don't really think anyone will be coming for hours." he idly scratches his cheek. "do you mind if i ask you a question, though?"

"nothing too serious, i promise." well, actually. "a little serious, maybe."

"You presume to know my age, then?" Celica asks half-teasingly—ever since becoming queen, she had grown accostumed to people judging her by her youth, underestimating her and Alm for their lack of years and experience. But she couldn't let such things stop her; they had been the only ones equipped to lead Valentia from the perspective of royalty, and commoners, who suffered bandits and famine firsthand.

A king and queen, who once toiled in the same fields as their own people.

She couldn't afford to be anything but capable, but wise, though she has certainly made plenty of mistakes in her day. Celica laughs a bit at the thought—though the ruefulness of the gesture was sure to go over Pandreo's head. "I've had to grow up fast, I suppose. Circumstances didn't exactly allow me the most conventional of childhoods."

Hand slips into his as he introduces himself, as warm and welcoming as his friendly demeanor. Most people of the cloth presented themselves as such: caring, welcoming, nurturing. But there was a certain... vibrancy to him, prone to draw someone in like the warmth of the sun.

"Fine, fine," She giggles, "Pandreo, then. Not often I meet a priest lacking in such formality... of course, I don't mean that rudely, either. It's nice. Refreshing, even."

Drawing her hand back, Celica glances around the cathedral. "But I'm not distracting you from anything important, am I? If you came to make ready for the day, I can get out of your hair..." His very oddly styled hair, "Or help, if you're in need of more hands?"

#seraphiia #✞ ` ‣ 【 THREAD ; PORTRAIT OF A SAINT 】 #lord up in heaven let me remember what this question is when i get this draft back amen

[revelale]

pandreo bites his tongue. he almost wants to make a joke just to redirect her attention. but, it's hard to think of something to say when she's trying her best to make sure that he doesn't feel put out over it. he took no offense and could understand both things could be true: that she wanted to see him, knowing that he was here, and that she also needed to talk to someone about something. not mutually exclusive things, but he'd be ill-pressed to correct her on it when the divine one musters up the courage to come to her point.

( though, not before complimenting him so earnestly that he can feel the tips of his ears pink and he has to try his hardest to not brush it off unless he wanted to trap them both in an endless cycle of self-effacing. )

he keeps his smile, though his shoulders straighten and his hands come together in front of him. she's far from being alone in her fears, he thinks, as she explains. though, he's not played counsel to the other young rulers of their homeland, pandreo could only imagine the weight of responsibility. he doesn't dare call it a burden; and when she deflects back to him, he isn't sure if he should let her abide by that either. "of course," he answers after a beat of consideration.

he misses his own mother from time to time, though he knows few would understand why. as for the emblems—the divine one had a closer relationship to them than he could ever claim to.

he, had of course, spoken with them before, but to the divine one? he tries to put himself in her shoes. what would it have been like? marth was her confidante, her most earnest companion and someone who had been there from even before she knew her mother. but to put a name to that relationship, he doesn't think he could. "you're allowed to miss them. you don't have to apologize for missing your friends," friends still feels lacking, though, "and we can talk about it."

"you might feel better." but, he didn't want to press on it either if she wasn't up to it. "or, we can talk about what the elevation here's doing to my hair volume."

"No, i truly only wanted to see you." These holy grounds were home for confessions of sins and fears, but what had been on her mind was always just seeing the face of someone she held close. Awkwardness showed on her laughter as she scratched her nape. It felt wrong to drop all this on him who was always willing to hear others but never seemed to allow others to do the same for him. "I didn't meant to bring my own insecurities to the conversation, you already have enough on your plate, it's just..."

He was someone she could trust to give good advice? To hear her out without complaint? Or did she feel safe in his presence to show weakness without fearing his faith on her—as Alear and not the Divine One—to break?

Alear swallowed hard and then sighed, not the best reunion was it? "I can trust you to give advice i can trust on, because not only you're kind but you're also wise." Because his appearance may tell otherwise, but she had seen his work running the church even if it was through a party. He took it seriously, he lended an ear to those who needed to confess their worries to someone, who needed kind wise words to be lifted up.

Lively, kind, wise and gentle, she would describe him that way—but she wasn't his best friend, maybe someone like Fogado would disagree with her.

"I'm sorry Pandreo, i just, i—" Loss still felt too recent and as much as she took on her role with pride to follow a path built by others before her, she feared that it would never be enough to make them proud if they could see her. Marth had told her a world ruled by her would be wonderful, but there was much work to do for it to become as wonderful as he likely imagined it. "I guess i sometimes fear that i won't be enough as silly of a thought as it is."

Because it was a silly worry, no one was born prepared or perfect to lead. It took years of effort, surely her mother had insecurities when she began as Divine Dragon Queen and the one she got to meet was a much improved version of the one she was at the start of it.

"I guess it just feels worse because i still miss mother and the Emblems," Some days were up, she felt happy, excited, ready to take on the world and whatever challenge it would throw at her, ready to support others as they supported her. Sometimes she hurt for the people she would no longer see, but there was nothing she could about it but smile, push on and try to heal at her own pace. "You too have your troubles and here you are, pushing on."

"It's fine, if you believe i'm doing well then i surely am!" She smiled awkwardly, a chuckled sharing the same feeling. To throw all that load unprompted, it felt horrible. "But what's important right now is that i'm happy to see you're the same as ever."

#alliberacio #✞ ` ‣ 【 THREAD ; TRIPTYCH OF A DRAGON 】 #I TOOK SO LONG WE DON'T EVEN HAVE TO TAG SPOILERS ANYMORE #I'M CRYING I'M SO RRR Y R YY Y

[revelale]

4. A memory of a sibling

send a number for a memory.

panette was never really a doll kid. there wasn't a special reason for it. though, he knows his neighbors and the congregation sometimes had their theories. the reason why panette didn't really have any dolls or toys wasn't because their father liked to spend their paltry gold on bottles that he leaves half-empty on his worst days. and it wasn't because their mother liked to spend the church donations on pretty dresses accented with gold embroidery and scarlet red thread that would never see the world outside of her closet.

certainly, it wasn't because pandreo was a spendthrift either.

the reason panette didn't have a doll growing up was because panette's version of cute didn't match most little girls' version of cute.

where other little girls in their village liked pretty clothes and falling into step with their mothers, panette liked—well, what she liked the parts that he considered were truly part of solm. she liked bug molts and spider webs. when she ran off on her own, he'd find her bunkered down in the old quarter of town that'd mostly been abandoned. he remembers finding her with asps on more than one occasion, and on just how many of those she seemed to navigate it all just fine until he showed up and went and agitated them trying to protect her.

so, she didn't like dolls.

didn't have a reason to own any, and didn't care for them.

that—didn't stop him from trying at least once, though. he probably should've seen the signs. it was a creepy and weird looking doll, sitting neatly on a stand from a passing caravan. it looked like it had been sewn together from burlap, and its hair was thin and reedy. probably tugged loose from the date palms, he'd thought then. its mouth was stitched clumsily and its dress was as shabby as the clothes he wore. he probably could've made a better one. he should've made a better one. instead, he spent his meager savings on this little doll, brought it home and gave it to panette.

it went about as well as most gifts went over with her. glad for it, but would've been happier if the money had been spent on something tangible like better clothes for either of them or figuring a way out. so, it sat idly by on the shelf for days, then weeks. and then the nightmares started—a bonafide haunting, as pandreo would recount later, much to the delight of panette and the horror of pandreo.

eventually, they tried burning it. tried burying it out in the desert proper. but, it always came back. by the tenth attempt, they made their peace with it. a little haunting for their household. it wasn't too bad, though, save the sleep paralysis. whatever haunted that doll was still more pleasant than their parents were.

#shadoll #✞ ` ‣ 【 ANSWERS 】 #✞ ` ‣ 【 HCS 】 #is this really even a memory or a quick aside.......... #anyway remember when this meme was going around and i said i'd wait #and now it's been like three months lmfao........ #anyway i was thinking about this when i rmbred panette's Goth:tm: #who doesn't love a light haunting

[revelale]

@carefreemonk:

Rumors have started to float around Garreg Mach’s halls about a ghastly young woman haunting the monastery. Many claim to have seen a young woman in wedding white with a haunting expression on her face, though it seems nobody can agree on exactly where she was seen. The only natural choice to be made here is to go and investigate these sightings and figure out whether the woman is real or merely a figment of the student body’s imagination. [Grants Reason +1]

he tries his best to keep an open mind. just because he doesn't understand something doesn't make it inherently wrong, and because the young are oft to young: pandreo does his best. love is love and the divine one has room in her heart for all things. he should too. but, he thinks if he has to hear another student calling a supposed spirit haunting the monastery a gilf—as in, a ghost they'd like to fffriend, let's say—he thinks he's going to have a stroke.

hand rests against one of the stone walls as he makes another round, this brightly colored priest wilting because he feels like a summer that's gone and budded too early. his head hangs low and pandreo laments. not because he's in the company of teenagers nearly every day, but that he can feel his age catching up to him. he even thinks his back hurts a little more than it did yesterday and pandreo marks this new realization with a couple of raps of a fist against his spine.

"azama, can i ask you a question?" he wipes a tear from his eye as he hears the monk coming up behind him that'd been tasked with ' patrolling ' the ' halls ' to exterminate the ' ghost ' that had been ' seen. ' it was anyone's guess if there was even a spirit in the first place and the excuse was that they ought to cover their bases in every possible exorcism there was. just in case! but, he's pretty sure it was more just that no one else was willing to agree. could you imagine the archbishop doing it?

"do you know what a zommy is?"

he'd admit it in front of other adults. ( so he says, as though he's not markedly younger than some of the students around. ) he barely just figured out what zaddy meant, and he's just assuming that zommy was either another version of that or that they were trying to imply that they were into a zombie version of that.

and divine one bless him, he hopes there isn't a zombie.

MILGS (MAN I LOVE GHOSTS)

#carefreemonk #✞ ` ‣ 【 THREAD ; MILGS (MAN I LOVE GHOSTS) 】 #i can only deeply apologize for this taking as long as it did ouohugOUGHH #let me know if you need revisions or anything so this works better for ya!!!!!! #never thought i'd write zaddy into a post but today is the day

[revelale]

in theory, meditation is supposed to help calm the mind. it is supposed to temper the spirit, and suspend all physical necessity. if you were doing it right, you wouldn't think about how numb your legs felt sitting in the same position for as long as you were. if you were doing it right, you wouldn't think about how hard the pews in the cathedral were, or how dry your lips felt even as the snow packed you and dozens more students and faculty to a monastery too far to reach.

you definitely, absolutely wouldn't be thinking about how hungry you were. which, is exactly how pandreo knows that this part of subscribing to tradition is bullshit too. no amount of meditating had made him less hungry when he was a kid, and it definitely wasn't helping now. it wasn't going to help these kids either.

the corners of his lips twitch. he offers sharena a sympathetic look, as he carefully navigates the brush and snow, boots sinking with the weight even as the emptiness of his stomach makes him feel like he should be light enough to walk on top of it.

"come on. complaining won't make it any better, right?"

so he says, though he knows he'd have been just as miserable if he were able to voice aloud his pains. to fogado, bunet, panette—even her highness, princess timerra, he might've bitched. loudly, and improperly, even though he knows it would've done next to nothing. but, it was different when he was supposed to be the helpful and good-hearted priest, wasn't it? the hunger was insufferable, but the cold was worse and pandreo sneezes just as sharena marks her quarry by hitting the floor.

kneeling himself as to not cause her any problems, gold eyes peer through the brush at the same. "wolves?" he's in disbelief. it seemed—ill-advised.

he's pretty sure he should've said no and for them to retreat before they took notice, but what comes out of his mouth instead is: "do you think we can take 'em?"

IF YOU DIE IN THE ROLEPLAY, YOU DIE FOR REAL!!

#fenrena #✞ ` ‣ 【 THREAD ; IF YOU DIE IN THE ROLEPLAY¸ YOU DIE FOR REAL!! 】 #icb you made this the thread title........ #actually i can and that's what makes this worse

[revelale]

TOA Anniversary Munday!

Celebrating TOA and the people who contribute to make our group what it is.

Repost, don't reblog. Only fill in what you feel comfortable sharing!

Happy anniversary, TOA! Here's to many more years spent together.

tagging: you? :0)

Name: lilly!

Pronouns: she / they, big they though!

Birthday (no year): april 4th!

Where are you from? What is your time zone? pst, lmao. gmt-8, i think?

Roleplay experience: roughly like 20 years now? lmao, cringe.

Got any pets? yeah, my little buppy, max. he's a demon.

Favorite time of year: winter!

Some interests and things you like: cooking, baking, rhythm games, sleeping, lmao.

Some funfacts & trivia about you: i'm double-jointed in one hand; i tend to only bake cookies in batches of like 7 dozen or more; i've killed at least like six different succulents this year alone; every so often, i'll think about spider-man and its various iterations and fully forget what i was doing before i started thinking about it.

What non-Fire Emblem games do you play? the more recent persona games, a truly insane number of otomes, i still have not finished yakuza 0, pokemon, dress-up games, lmao,,,,,

Favorite Pokemon type & Pokemon: dragon, dragonite!

How did you get into Fire Emblem? ......... wanted another dating sim real bad and my friend told me to play awakening please do not judge me—

What Fire Emblem games have you played? everything post-awakening, lmao,,,,, except for sov, which continues to elude me in completion for reasons beyond my understanding

First Fire Emblem game: awakening!

Favorite Fire Emblem game: would it be bad if i said none of them—well, okay. technically, i think an awful lot about fates, but i don't necessarily think it's my favorite? ..... but i do think about it a lot.

Any Fire Emblem crushes? nnnnnnot that i can think of?

If you’ve played the following games, who was your first S support? wwww, awakening was chrom ( by accident ), then olivia ( intentionally lmao ); fates was takumi; three houses was claude lel; engage was pandreo, to no one's surprise.

Favorite Fire Emblem class: KINSHI KNIGHT NATION RISE!!!!

If you were a Fire Emblem character, what would be your class? villager, and i would have died four times before you recruit me.

If you were a Three Houses character, what would be your affiliation? golden deer, probably, lmfao.

If you were an Engage character, which Emblem would you Engage with? none, i'm firmly of the belief i'm an ultra npc.

How did you find TOA? chuu! had severe 3h brainrot, and chuu already was in the group and told me it was like full of people who didn't need me to be Online All The Time! it's funny because i ended up not even apping for someone from 3h either, lmao.

Current TOA muses: pandreo!

Who was your first TOA muse? If you don’t have them anymore, could you see yourself picking them up again? cynthia, my silly little horse girl, lmao. i always think about picking her up, but it's always a debate of if i've done enough on her or not. easily my favorite character to pick up and start running with, though.

Have you had any other TOA muses? shigure, lon'qu, CONSTANCE VON NUVELLE, m!byleth, shiro, kiragi,,,,, i think that's it, actually? i don't remember any of my other ones, oopsie, lmao.

Do you think you have a type of character you gravitate towards? i tend to generally write characters in my wheelhouse, though i think i have deviations now and again lmao. like, who would think i'd write shigure, right? but, mostly cheerful characters, i think. mood-makers, the kind of people who would set a scene, but also be enough of a backseat player to the driving force where any protagonist or antagonist would take up the reins more comfortably? i think they tend to get written off as genki or filler characters, so i like kind of prodding at their insecurities and seeing what makes them tick instead.

What do you believe you enjoy writing the most? lmao, lbr i'm made for the clown show. nonsensical moments, increasingly strange meet and greets? but, i like doing big establishing moments that suspend what you know about my characters at face value to explore what's deeper in there. i'll slowburn friendship, idgaf; that's my shit.

Favorite TOA-related memory: lel, team justice is still a highlight in my memory from l&k, but i also remember this very specific combat sequence i wrote with rai in the first major lore event with felix and cynthia that was sick as hell to do! ....... also, probably every piemageddon. it is funny seeing even the serious characters fear for their lives / get uber maniacal in a ridiculous situation.

Got any delusions that didn’t see the light of day in TOA that you’d like to share? do not look behind the curtain, lmao.

#✞ ` ‣ 【 OOC 】 #this was cute to do thank you neffi :softsmile:

[revelale]

Send A Number to Experience One of My Muse’s Memories

Memories are vignettes for one’s past, and often times, they are very telling.

1. Their First Memory 2. A memory of their father 3. A memory of their mother 4. A memory of a sibling 5. A memory of a pet 6. A turning point in their life 7. A memory they want to forget 8. A hazy memory 9. A photographic memory 10. A disappointing memory 11. A memory that may or may not have happened 12. A happy memory 13. A memory of a friend 14. A memory of a relationship 15. A heartbreaking memory 16. A memory that makes them angry 17. A memory of something they regret 18. A memory they’d love to change 19. A memory of someone they don’t see anymore 20. A memory of someone who is deceased 21. A memory of the first time they did an activity they love 22. A childhood memory 23. A school day memory 24. A holiday memory 25. A birthday memory 26. A memory they want to share 27. A memory of something they’re proud of 28. A memory that strains a relationship 29. A memory they can’t let themselves forget 30. Asker’s choice 31. Writer’s choice

#✞ ` ‣ 【 ASKBOX 】 #i'll probably answer these pretty slowly .....

[revelale]

"i can't tell if you're teasing me or if you're serious," pandreo answers, laughing as the divine one punctuates the word ' serious ' with air quotes. she wouldn't have been wrong to say so. even in the queendom, there were very few that were tolerant of his behavior, all of whom were content to say that what he did was unbefitting of the church even well after he felt that he'd proven his point.

he can't help but beam a little at her reply. it'd been a stretch to even think of asking her to join them in their revelry, and even more to call her friend, but it was gratifying to know that he hadn't been wrong in what he'd chosen to do.

how many people could say that they had the approval of their god? he doubts any of the boring, formal shmucks did for doing the ' right ' things.

ah, maybe this is a pride thing he should reflect on later.

"thanks, divine one," he nods, "well, you know. you're welcome there any time that you can drop by. maybe not now, though; it'd be a heck of a flight ba—oh," and the divine one marches on, undeterred, in her complimenting of him. compliments? ah, should he really think of them as that or were they just statements of fact? he can't help but pinch the back of his neck, half nerves and half shock.

she was—woefully sincere, is somehow the worst part.

because, then he knows she means it, and that this was how she just was. "ah, no! no! you're so good at it already!" he waves his hands in front of him then when the divine one turns the conversation back onto herself and her perceived shortcomings. "it's not like i do anything special, really." the way she makes it sound, it almost sounds like a skill. it—well, in some ways, it was, but ... his fingers curl into the palms of his hands, loose fists hovering in the air as his brain works in double time.

"is that why you came here, divine one?" he smiles awkwardly. "i saw a few of the others here too, mostly for the same things." wanting to better gird themselves for the heavy fates that awaited them, and to lead their countries to reconstruction and connection, while people like him and his sister had been living their daily lives uninterrupted precisely because there were leaders that chose to do that.

Visiting would have taken so much of her time, it wasn't just him—Solm, it was missing every one of her friends as they all had their fair share of work to handle. Some important events she got to experience but that was it when it came to visits as she still had to settle to her own role as monarch. But she couldn't complain now she got to see some of her dear friends, although not everyone just seeing one or two familiar faces had her going with more excitement throughout her day.

"I've been busy but i'm glad i got to see you, seeing a friend again makes me happy." But she went quiet as he leaned over to whisper. Hearing him speak such honest words meant to be kept a secret had her trying to hold back a laugh—trying and failing for as much as she covered her lips with the back of her mouth she bursted out laughing, the sound echoed against the walls. "Well Pandreo, not many people can match your energy."

She could likely count in one hand people that could be as energetic as Pandreo. "But i don't mean it in a bad way, i can imagine they're more," She made quotation marks using her fingers. "'Serious', about religion." Ironic of her to say that to him when he was the most devout person to—her. But she didn't wish to think about their bond of a god and a devout, rather focusing on the most important one, friends. "But i think it's that energy that makes your church one i would go to if i was a devout of... some other deity."

"Your energy makes a place for people to find hope one that truly works, you're warm, welcoming and the party i got to attend made me see how much of a hardworker you are to make everyone comfortable to share their troubles if they have any." He was easy to talk to not only because he was a lively person with how he casually spoke to people, but because he was always open minded—feeling judged was hard when he was the one listening. "Seeming serious about your job is important, but taking a page of your book surely would do them a favor." Alear chuckled, she too should.

"I have so much to learn from you so one day i can be as good at supporting people as you are," Because yes she had made many friends and many people trusted her as their deity—she understood the importance of that. But surely there was more she could do for the people that placed their faith in her, Lumera was loved by the people because she was kind and loving—even if many never got to meet her, they saw her as someone to have faith on.

Not to mention the Emblems, they were symbols of strength too and now that she got to fight them and form a bond with them, she knew how important they were to the world. "I still have much to learn if i want to be as half as good a ruler and protector as mother and the Emblems were."

Looking at Pandreo she remembered the prophecy he told her; 'When the dragon child rises from their slumber on the dais, saved the world will be.' funny now that she thought of it, it had become true. But was it enough to have saved the world with the aid of her friends? Many people ended losing their lives or left suffering in the end, there was clearly more she could do for the survivors of a war they never fought on.

She waved her arms in an attempt to brush away the insecurities she had dropped away from his face. "I'm sure with time they'll get used to you and loosen up a little, at least i would."

#alliberacio #✞ ` ‣ 【 THREAD ; TRIPTYCH OF A DRAGON 】 #engage spoilers #what the shit is this post i have no idea!!!!!!

[revelale]

this was not in his job description. the smell of herbs and poultices burn at his nostrils, and pandreo has to work hard to not let the stinging of the smells show on his face. in his capacity as a priest in elyos, the extent to which he was involved in healing was limited to the battlefield. any real and true healing was done by experts in their craft and in their skill. he thinks of jean, and how that pint-sized doctor might've reveled at the opportunity to show his skill when it came to this sort of a thing.

but when it came to him, as in pandreo—would it really be a surprise to people to learn he wasn't much of a caretaker?

it wasn't that his bedside manner was lacking. he had great empathy for people. it hurt to see other people being hurt and it made him feel useless when he could do nothing to ease their pains. but, it just wasn't something that he was trained in, contrary to the monks at the monastery here. that made well and enough sense. it was home to a military academy, and the word ' military ' implies injuries. he just didn't think that meant that he was the one resolving those injuries.

least of all with these plants and herbs, which he's learning from a book as much as the unfamiliar professor seated beside him.

"right," pandreo answers in turn as he peeks over the man's shoulder to try and parse out what he can of the plants they'd been given. he really only recognizes a few of these from the book. basic ones from when he'd been growing up, and they lacked the gold for any treatments: feverfew, for reducing fevers; garlic, to lower inflammation; ginger, for nausea; valerian, for insomnia.

the ones that they were actually testing were all unfamiliar.

"did they say how we're supposed to prepa—hi." he doesn't finish his question. he's already nose to nose with the other instructor, and all pandreo can do is stare dry-mouthed and in shock as he's promptly asked ' what are you? ' to which, he can only answer half-seriously with narrowed eyes: "a priest?" was that the question?

"what—are you?" was that rude?

damn bro u teach like this? | m!byleth & pandreo

This most recent run of the Arena results in more injuries than usual, and with resources scarce as-is, the infirmary turns to lesser-used remedies and ancient herbs to try to treat these wounds. Few people want to try them, for good reason: the list of potential side-effects is almost as long as your final essay in history class. Yet the nurses are in grave need of test subjects willing to test out these new cures. Will you help them out?

closed starter for @revelale​

He was still getting a grasp of the situation, having just arrived- but it was chaotic even after he managed to understand what was going on. A training tournament of sorts with the students and faculty split into teams, and then injuries happened. Made sense, seeing how this place was a military academy. It was only natural for injuries to happen during training.

It was the number of people that made Byleth stand at the infirmary door for a good five minutes. That’s a lot of people, alright. Either this academy’s training staff forgot that students lack experience or maybe said students have been skipping classes on the matter of dodging attacks. 

Or maybe both, that was very much possible.

Byleth did have some knowledge of faith magic, it was a valuable skill for any mercenary, but the nurses asked him to just use the typical natural techniques for the sake of doing things faster. Faith magic, as reliable as it was, could only be performed with one patient at the time and right now the volume of students was way past that point. The only issue was…well, those natural techniques had quite the list of adverse effects.

And that was how Byleth found himself sitting down criss cross on the floor with a book on his lap- a book whose weight rivaled that of his iron sword mind you, alongside another man of the faculty staff. He had never seen that guy before, despite essentially being his work colleague.

“The nurses asked us to test some of those herbs. They can’t test it on the students.” So they’d be the guinea pigs for this. The girl inside his mind wasn’t too thrilled at the idea, but Byleth didn’t quite care. “We should start with herbs for smaller injuries.” Grabbing a small pouch with a tag, Byleth compared the name of the herb with a list of names in the book. This one should be for scraped and other superficial wounds. 

Blue eyes focused on the listed side effects. Then he flipped the page before finishing his read. “We’ll figure out the side effects as we go.”

He side eyed the fellow instructor. Which then turned into a full stare. “What are you?” He meant to ask what was the other’s job, but oh well.

#daeificatio #✞ ` ‣ 【 THREAD ; DAMN BRO U TEACH LIKE THIS? 】 #thank you for starting!!!!!!!!! and sorry for slow reply

[revelale]

she smiles, and the softness in her summer face puts the name in his mouth before she offers it to him. "uh huh," comes his distracted reply, as his own smile shrinks a fraction. firene's emblem: the caring princess in the flesh, here and in the flesh before him. he has to wonder what the princess céline might've said if she got a chance to see her, and if the prince alfred might've fainted if he did. or, maybe that it was the complete opposite? hell, he didn't really know.

he didn't really know them all that well in the first place.

his mind races ahead with questions that he wants to ask, but he grounds himself in the moment to keep the grace of knowing. she speaks of gods and humans and knows them for what they are. "you're telling me."

he nearly fainted on the spot when he met the divine one for the first time, and nearly every time since when he wasn't expecting it.

"you're pretty wise for someone your age," he replies unwittingly, smiling as he crosses his arms over his chest. "i don't mean that rudely, by the way," that was all that religion was: gods erring as humans did because they were all that shaped them, flawed and fallible. his thoughts wander to the divine one and all her fears and reservations, of all her pains and the burdens she carries on her shoulders but does not speak to. not to him, not to anyone. "it usually takes priests years learning the liturgy and the scripture before anyone understands what we're talking about."

another slight shrug. "and even then, heh."

"it's the same for me. i think of her in difficult times before i think of this saintess and her teachings," he extends a hand to her as she offers her name, and he says nothing of knowing it already. "she wasn't the one that raised me." and neither was the divine one, but explaining the nuances there were difficult, "pandreo. if you call me father, i will tell the priests here what we're talking about, though."

Her eyes widen slightly at his playful bid for silence, and whatever anxiety she may have felt is soon washed away in the warm nostalgia it brings her. Celica doesn't think she's seen a clergyman quite so lighthearted, save for her own Father Nomah. (Oh, how he loved his little jests and japes.)

It does wonders to ease her mood, and the pensive furrow of her brow softens, giving way to a smile. "You don't either? I see..." Perhaps he, too, hailed from lands outside of Fodlan. Or maybe he was in the church for his own reasons, ones that didn't have to do with worship.

It certainly hadn't been piety that first lead her to Mila's doorstep.

In response to his question, Celica repeats, "...Hm, probably." Arms fold, resting over her midsection. "Gods can walk among us, you know. And they can be just as human, just as flawed and susceptible to emotion, as any of us."

One arm unfolds, and she reaches to trace the edge of a pew; the wood worn with cuts and divots underneath her fingertip. "But I'm not worried. It's just... a matter of courtesy, I suppose. This is Seiros' church, and though I see validity in all—" Most, "—faiths, I can only think to my Mother when I find myself in need of solace."

She looks up to the clergyman with a smile. "But do forgive my manners. I'm Celica. It's a pleasure to meet you, sir."

#seraphiia #✞ ` ‣ 【 THREAD ; PORTRAIT OF A SAINT 】 #it's even funnier when you think celica's like a discount god because of the whole emblem situation #and pandreo's literally just some guy #engage spoilers #not actually sure if anything i wrote is a spoiler but eh