revibing-my-life

[revibing-my-life]

being individuals together is so intimate. let’s read different books but curled up next to each other, let’s visit a coffee shop so you can study and i can write, let’s just be near each other

[revibing-my-life]

I be like "omg, i have so much to do" and then go lay down

[revibing-my-life]

It’s so hard being a silly goose in this anti-whimsy society

[revibing-my-life]

[revibing-my-life]

“We all eat lies when our hearts are hungry.”

— Unknown

[revibing-my-life]

kids remind me, often, of the things i've taught myself out of.

i have a big dog. he looks like a deer. he is taller than most young children. while we were on a trail the other day, a boy coming our direction saw us and froze. he took a step back and said: "i'm feeling nervous. your - your dog is kind of big."

goblin and i both stopped walking immediately. "he is kind of a big dog," i admitted. "he's called a greyhound. they are gentle but they are pretty tall, which is kind of scary, you're right. their legs are so long because they are made for running fast. i am sorry we scared you. would you like us to stand still while you move past us, or would you feel more safe in your body if we move and you stay still?'

"oh. i didn't know that about - greyhounds. i think i ... i want to stay still," he said. at this point, his adult had caught up to us. "i'm nervous about the dog," he told her, "so i'm - i'm gonna stay still." she didn't argue. she didn't make fun of him. she just smiled at him and at me and held his hand while goblin and i, with as wide of a berth as we could make, crept our way through.

behind us, i heard him exhale a deep breath and kind of laugh - "he was really big, huh? she said it's because greyhounds have to go fast."

"he was big," she said. "i understand why that could have made you a little scared."

"yeah. next time i - next time do you think i could maybe ask to touch him? when - i mean, next time, maybe, if i'm not nervous."

later, going to a work event, in the big city, i stood outside, trembling. my social anxiety as a caught bird in my chest. i took a deep breath and turned to my coworker. she's not even really my friend yet. i told her: "i feel nervous about this. i am not used to meeting new people, ever since covid."

she laughed, but not in a mean way. she said she was nervous too. she reached her hand out and held mine, and we both took another deep breath and walked in like that, interlinked. a few people asked us - together? - and i told the truth: i feel nervous, and she's helping. over and over i watched people relax too, admitting i feel really kind of shy lately actually, thank you for saying that.

the next time i go to an event, and i feel a little scared, i ask right away: wanna hold hands? this feels a little dangerous. i hesitate less. i don't hide it as much. i watch for other people who are also nervous and say - it's kinda hard, huh?

i know, logically, i'm not good at asking for help. but i am also not good at noticing when i need help. i've trained myself out of asking completely, but i've also trained myself to never accept my own fears or excuses. i have trained myself to tamp down every anxiety and just-push-through. i don't know what i'm protecting myself from - just that i never think to admit it to anyone.

but every person on earth occasionally needs comfort. every person on earth occasionally needs connection. many of us were taught independence is the same thing as never needing anything.

each of us should have had an adult who heard - i feel nervous and held our hand and asked us how we could be helped to feel safe. no judgement, and no chiding. many of us did not. many of us were punished for the ways that we seemed "weak".

but here is something: i am an adult now. and i get nervous a lot, actually. and if you are an adult and you are feeling a little nervous - come talk to me. we can hold hands and figure out what will help us feel safe in our bodies. and maybe, next time, if we're brave, we can pet the dog that's passing.

[revibing-my-life]

[revibing-my-life]

[revibing-my-life]

the bunnies did the lady and the tramp kiss. help i’m crying

[revibing-my-life]

I'm tobby, a transgender who lives in an unsafe environment. I've been bullied and faced hell, I lost my job because my boss is transphobic. I'm looking to move out as soon as possible I only need $1,500 to get this done. I'm  pleading to the LGBTQ community to support me.

I have my full story on my pinned post here

https://imadeitalive.tumblr.com/post/677630215463272449/help-a-homeless-black-trans-woman

Every cent matters now. I'd appreciate your support(forgive me if you're a minor). Please consider rebloging to spread the new. Thank you

Boosting

#boosting #black trans crowdfund #black trans lives matter

[revibing-my-life]

happy international womens day to all the women!!!

butch & stone butch women, femme & stone femme women, lesbian women, bi women, pan women, straight women, mspec women, questioning women, queer women, aro women, ace women, aroace women, loveless women, lovequeer women, polyamorous women, non partnering women;

cis women, trans women, gnc women, nonbinary women, multigender women, genderqueer women;

women of colour, neurodivergent women, religious & non-religious women, plus size women, disabled women.... and all the incredible, amazing, talented, gorgeous, handsome, extraordinary women i haven't mentioned.

women are awesome, and i hope all of you, every single one of you, has a fantastic day 💕🥂

[revibing-my-life]

Forest House in Ukraine by U-STYLE / Dinara Yusupova

[revibing-my-life]

the intimacy of reading while someone you love sits close to you, reading their own book, being so comfortable with each other that it feels natural, like you’re truly home

[revibing-my-life]

i’m not sleepy in a cute way but in a chronic depression and insomnia way 

[revibing-my-life]

find someone you don't have to hide your bad days from

[revibing-my-life]

Portuguese Legend Physiology and Power Weaponry

Click on it twice. These are your two super powers.

[revibing-my-life]