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05.12.24
yday i did my laundry
lowered my standing desk height so that my laptop screen doesn't obscure the desktop
moved the box of clothes i don't wear to under the bed, and common totebags to the closet stand
moved my mirror to the wall to the left of my desk
replaced the trash bag lol
i have body aches and chills so i'm just at home : ' ( using up my napkins to blow my nose though lol
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02.19.24 "domestic bliss"
before today, you said to me, "tell me you love me," and when i asked about it afterwards, you replied, "it just seemed like the thing to say." you also said, that day, as you have so many other times, "now go home," in a way i've taken to be compassionate and kind --
it's raining today, and through the sun roof, i see the clouds. last night was one of the rare nights where no one else was home but me, so you came over -- over the last year you've joked about domestic bliss whenever i talk about my housemates, and now, here you are, in my living room, on the futon i bought and placed by the window, in part inspired by the futon you have placed next to yours. months before, also with you, i'm reminded by co--star of how another definition of belonging entails fitting together, and here you are, snugly in my bed, before you, too, pick yourself up to go home.
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02.16.24 & 02.19.24
02.19.24
I feel like I'm playing a little puzzle in figuring out the placement of things, it is nice to create expanses of space though!
Watered plants
Moved curtains to under my table & dj set to behind the back room
Bought basic groceries [egg, sausage, veggies]
moved suitcase and guitar from my room to the back room and moved my food items into the kitchen!
It hit me at some point the last week or so that I very much want to feel at home, and feeling at home entails not just being able to work or function in particular ways, but to feel relaxed, calm, to want to linger where I live! How unused to that I am, but how much more possible it feels now
02.16.24
Gathered all my dying plants and refilled the watering things lol [ I think I wanna water daily in the morning? ]
Cleared the table of stationary and packaging stuff, wiped it down
Feeling: determined for this space to feel like mine, to name and sacralize what is mine, sad about how alone I feel in this given moment, illusory shame about not knowing everything in a given moment
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