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rk1stars · 21 days

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BITTERSWEET

( a jay drabble )

A look through of Jay’s diary expressing how things ended up between you two. ┆ star’s note . Sorry for the messy writing i just wanted to post angst

I hate you.

I remember the first time I saw you. It was at this crazy party, with music blasting and people dancing everywhere. In the middle of the crowd, I spotted you chatting with a girl, and your smile lit up the whole room. That smile got stuck in my head, and I just wanted to see it every day.

I never thought that I’d ever fall in love, to me everyone was just a blur but you changed that. You were bright, like a star shining in the sky. You were the light of my life.

I hate how much power you had over me. I couldn't go a moment without thinking about you. Every little thing reminded me of you.

I was so in love with you, to the point I wish it never happened. Would it have been better if we never met?

My life feels empty all because of you. I hate the amount of nights you made me cry myself to sleep, I hate how you made me unable to love anyone else.

Nobody could make me forget you, it was like you were haunting my mind.

I know you can’t read this but remember when you said I was talented enough to be a guitarist? I know you’ll kill me for this but I got an offer from a big company and I rejected them.

I just couldn't pick up my guitar again after you left, every time I looked at my guitar it reminded me of you and that stupid voice of yours cheering me on.

Why did you have to leave? We were so happy. I hate myself for not fixing the messy fate we have. I wish I could have turned back time and fixed everything.

I feel so selfish for letting you leave without a fight. I despise myself for watching you slip away from my grasp so effortlessly.

I’m sorry, my love. I hope one day I can meet you again.

I’m sorry for not noticing what you were going through, I still talk to you through the sky. You look gorgeous even tho I can't physically see you.

I love you, it's a bittersweet feeling.

I’m sorry for not answering your final call when you were about to leave, I still hate myself for it.

This is my final note before I meet you again. I hope I can meet you again in the skies, I can't wait. Maybe we can finally have our happy ending, see you soon, my love.

—

As Jay finished writing his letter on the small sheet of paper, he gripped the letter in his hand with tears falling down his eyes before swallowing the final pills.

Jay falls to the ground slowly losing his consciousness, before finishing his last breath.

Maybe you two will finally have your happy endings.

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rk1stars · 1 month

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TO GUIDE THROUGH THE SKY

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