#✑ memes — ᴍᴜꜱᴇ ᴘʀᴏᴍᴘᴛꜱ .

[trickrydomain]

MEMES FROM THE GODLESS LAND OF TIKTOK REVISITED

              the below prompts are a mix of general thoughts, 2am thoughts, suggestive prompts, and some nihilistic / possibly triggering prompts related to self reflection.

your bones are wet.

i prefer my puns intended.

alexa, turn off my emotions.

i’m baby, and i’m fucking cute.

you have failed the vibe check.

beef jerky is just meat raisins.

*brandishing a knife* cuddle me.

the point of golf is to play less golf.

i’m shaving my legs, then i’m on my way.

do you like potatoes? no? then fuck you.

the gods don’t want to fuck you!! stop!!

listen here you delicious fuck, i like you.

bold of you fucks to assume that i’m not god.

i can be your comfort and your favorite threat.

what’s your toxic trait? mine is being a bitch.

i want to suck you in like my one last cigarette.

hey did you hear there’s mercury in the gatorade.

that’s…that’s it? that’s your evil villain excuse?

who the fuck is playing music at 2 in the morning?!

are cakes with filling just really thick sandwiches?

i want you every day for breakfast, lunch, and dinner.

i’m big spoon. i may be a backpack, but i’m big spoon.

if asexual is “shagnostic”, are bisexuals “ambisextrous”?

which one of you motherfuckers snitched on me to my mom?!

you come over here right now and smack my ass like a drum.

i’m a top! i may be a crop top, but i’m still a fucking top.

what song do you think could be made in to a good sea shanty?

( sender tries to lift a heavy rock to impress the receiver.)

if bears aren’t meant to be hugged, why are they friend-shaped?

if your tongue sticks when you lick it it’s a bone! *clap clap*

you’re the best kind of fucking person and i would die for you.

i didn’t see that coming. probably because i had my back turned.

living people eat dead mushrooms. living mushrooms eat dead people.

fried eggs and fried chicken are different stages of the same food.

shiny knick knacks go click clack *shakes [small objects] together*

one day, i wanna be rich enough that my big fridge has a lil fridge.

the neighbors don’t take care of their dog so i guess it’s mine now.

you want my last name? that’s the sexiest thing you’ve ever said to me.

i’m compact, okay? i know i’m small but that doesn’t mean i’m not strong.

this dude thinks he can seduce me with his jawline? *a scoff* he’s right.

mercury might be in gatorade, but the pug had bones. let’s get this bread.

my electronic toothbrush died, so now i have to brush my teeth acoustically.

the only b-word i’ll ever call you is beautiful. (a pause) i love you, bitch.

i don’t know why people call it the roof of their mouth when it’s the ceiling.

i believe there are aliens in the ocean and nobody ever fucking listens to me.

i’m….so sorry….i’ve learned….my lesson (throws an object to distract and runs away).

i just found out what a biblically correct angel looks like and honestly, i’m scared.

trauma isn’t just the bad things that happened. it’s also the good things that never came.

if you’re sad or mad, shove that shit down deep and eat an uncrustable like the rest of us.

i called you to this meeting because i’m sad and you’re supposed to do something about that.

you want to take a shower? you gotta knock on the wall and ask the water to come out nicely.

flirt with me just right and, as long as you respect my boundaries, you could unlock my wares.

there’s the saying ‘you are what you eat’…now i’m concerned for the people who say ‘i’m baby’.

i was doing stuff with my birth chart and i was not prepared to learn that the moon knows i’m gay.

don’t you hate it when you’re trying to pick a scenario to fall asleep to and there’s nothing good on?

i’m just saying, when you go underwater, you enter a dimension where you can fly but you can’t breathe.

do you know who gets sent in when people want to act a fool? this basic bitch who’s secretly full of rage.

the only way capitalism can become beneficial is if it becomes legal to eat the rich once they become too wealthy.

sure my body’s a temple, but you know what? some temples are unkempt and falling apart and maybe a little bit haunted.

in other news, the sexual position known as 69 will now be called 96. due to the economy, the cost of eating out has gone up.

i was just walking outside and it looks like someone fell (evidence that they are the one that fell) i feel bad for that idiot.

god making me was like, “little bit of sugar, little bit of spice, little bit of everything nice…and a big ol’ heaping handful of bitch.”

i was single for a long time, like a long time. but then i met the love of my life. he is my boyfriend - he doesn't know it yet, but he is.

are you under the impression that i allow everyone in my life to treat me like this, or are you asking me to make an exception just for you? answer quickly.

look, what i’m saying is an apology is not worth saying if you don’t feel bad about what you did and it’s not really an apology unless it features an admission of fault and a promise to not repeat the behavior.

i don’t know what happened but the toilet is smoking! ( cut to inside a bathroom, two rolls of toilet paper have been placed on the closed lid to resemble eyes, and a tube is pinned between the lid and seat, resembling a cigar )

#✑ memes — ᴍᴜꜱᴇ ᴘʀᴏᴍᴘᴛꜱ . #// feel free to reblog without sending