#❧ ━ ❝ ch. KAEN || verse vi: TDC ❞ ━ ☙

[strywoven-moved]

@theydefy asked : ❝ i heard voices . last night . saying horrible things . ❞ // rian to kaen !

𝑷𝒓𝒐𝒎𝒑𝒕𝒆𝒅.

Any morning greeting which had risen ‘pon the tongue is silenced when Kaen pulls back from placing a kiss to Rian’s cheek ( the words uttered to their perked ear : we must speak , it’s important ) .  No room to disagree , not the time to a s k for details , the Stonewood is already marching beyond them to a more secluded path where they can talk without interference.  Standing stationary a moment , Kaen simply takes a breath , lifts their chin ( gives themself the reminder – again – that he is effectively above them in rank even if not wholly above them in power ; whatever is his ask , he is to receive ) .  “Yessir,” They hiss under their breath , out of earshot , nearly spat to the ground at their feet.  Still , the godling’s stride covers ground much q u i c k e r than he , they easily manage to fall into line at his shoulder ( a good soldier , a loyal tribute , as always ) .

Once effectively away from the others , Kaen resumes their place leaning ‘gainst a tree , hand motioning for the younger to say as he will so they may in kind listen.  Even ‘fore he’s to open his mouth , they can t e l l it’s not pleasant news.  If they have learned anything at all it is how to read the character of gelfling – most especially those closest to them.  Rian , though he’d rise to argue otherwise , is EASY for them to diagnose ( he is , after all , their lover ; the first they laid with , the first they gave themself to in all the ways a beloved knows how – mind , body , & even soul — ) .  They can s e n s e it like an uneasy prickling in their heart , feel it radiating from him ; something has gone WRONG , and his fury , his displeasure , is palpable to them in such a way that makes them feel some sense of pre-distaste.

Rian discloses his piece and though they are n o t quite surprised ( after all , not every army is without its few spoiled souls to disturb the flock ) , they feel their expression show something to the effect of CONCERN .  Red brows knit together , dark gaze casting away in contemplation.  “... Those tha’ ye ‘eard sayin’ these things … Dissenters ?”  They don’t have to look at him to know he’s affirming what they both already know.  “Troublin’ news…”  Spoken more to themself than him , a hand coming up to knead at the juncture of hitched brows.  They sigh , lowering their hand and looking at him again.  “Ah’ve ne’er been in this situation b’fore , Rian , Ah wouldnae know where ta’ begin wit’ somethin’ like this.”  Even in saying the words , they sense he’s already figured out a course of action , perhaps even prior to telling them.  Letting them know what was happening was merely a c o u r t e s y before anything was done and that drove a burning bitterness into them they’re not sure what to do with.  The realization comes to them : Rian may meet this problem with equal force.  No risks could be taken , nothing could be left to chance.  He may very well intend to KILL THOSE who stand in the way of what is right for his people ⸺

But , they wonder , does spilling more blood ( however warranted ) solidify faith ?

“... Wha’e’er ye decide , Rian,” Kaen says , “Ah’ll stand by ye.”  Chin inclinces , antlered head bowing slightly ( a sign of respect as much as resignation ) .  “Yer will is m’own , aye ?”  They just hope his will does not steer them wrong.

#❧ ━ ❝ OOC || maybe QUEUE really are just some forgotten story in the end || queue ❞ ━ ☙ #❧ ━ ❝ ch. KAEN || answered ❞ ━ ☙ #❧ ━ ❝ ch. KAEN || verse vi: TDC ❞ ━ ☙ #theydefy #theydefy || rian

[strywoven-moved]

A/N: Please keep in mind , I’ve only experienced the TDC Netflix series alongside whatever snippets of information other people have provided about the novels.  My overarching knowledge is not vast , but as long as you don’t mind having patience filling in the blanks , please accept my tribute.  There’s a lot here , though !  Under a cut for the sake of saving everyone’s dashes.

General Information

The world , or rather the realm , Kaen comes from is simply referred to as “THE WYRD” .  The Wyrd is made up of several eclectic species ; an assortment of fae-like creatures ( the commonwealth known to kaen simply as the Folk ) , great daemons who make their home in the Outer-Wilds , and scatterings of other foreign beasts nestled ‘tween.  Much of The Wyrd is WILDERNESS , townships and clans make their homes in the midst of lush biomes or harrowing mires and ancient grottos rife with ruins.  There are oceans , and there are frozen territories.  But the majority is overcome by thriving nature.  At the heart is the Citadel , wherewithin resides the pantheon ( consider it similar to mount olympus ) .  When mentioning “The Wyrd” in conversation , Kaen is often referring not solely to the realm but its people ; “The Wyrd” is very much a generalized , all-encompassing term.

A note on The Wyrd’s pantheon: Very paganistic ; Cernunnos is considered the central God ( an all-father , if you will ) from which all Lesser Gods supposedly came.  Cernunnos , in context , has much of his legend lost to the ages.  Cernunnos is AN ETERNAL FIGURE , although able to be felled , it is assured that he will eventually rise come the following Spring.  The function of the pantheon is to oversee / maintain the balance of The Wyrd and its people ( which , of course , is never a fool-proof science ) .

Cernunnos is very , very , very old.  He has seen many a tide come and go from The Wyrd.  Although still rather powerful - terrifyingly so - he found it in himself to turn the mantle over to an heir … Enter his ONLY CHILD , Kaen.

Kaen is what you would call a Faun ; a creature who is both deer-like and human-like in appearance.  The Council sees very little value in Kaen , discrediting them and dismissing them.  Even their father is not so easily appeased , acting less like a father and more an authoritarian who dictates their rites in preparation for overtaking the god-seat.

Kaen is often underestimated and misjudged based solely on THEIR APPEARANCE ; looking and speaking rather sweetly , being quite kind - standing as an antithesis to their force of nature for a father.  Kaen , however , has earned many credits for being exemplary in combat , mystic arts and magic , and other such skills.  But still , with their father keeping them confined to a gilded cage , barely allowing them many freedoms beyond their studies in the Citadel , the godling often feels TRAPPED & PURPOSELESS which has led to many , many troublesome rebellions in the several hundred years of their lifetime.

Much of this storyline revolves around Kaen at last defying their father , proving their worth , and having their potential come to fruition for something well-worth fighting for ( that is , by lending their strength to the gelfling’s cause ) .  Whether they DIE TRYING , is another matter entirely.

Some Tidbits

The Wyrd believe HEAVILY in Fate or destiny ( nothing is left to chance, barely anything is seen as mere coincidence - most especially matters of the heart ) ; often referring to this by proxy of “threads” some more perceptive Folk are able to quite literally see ( lit. “the threads of Fate” ; “your threads have brought us together” ; “her thread is frayed, she is not long for this world”, etc. ).  Kaen is just such an individual , being ascribed as having a mystic’s SIGHT which has both allotted them many blessings and curses in their time.

Kaen’s native tongue is similar to Gaelic ( “god-speak” according to the Folk ) , when voicing it aloud it sounds half-sung , half-spoken.

Per their father , Kaen is also the god of the cyclical nature of life , death and rebirth , as well as sex and fertility ; they’ve a strong connection to wild things , hunting , strength and passion.  Kaen is intrinsically connected to The Wyrd ; in essence , they ARE The Wyrd just as their father is.  As time progresses , their connection with Thra cultivates in the same manner : because of their nature as a god , they become innately in-tune with Thra itself and its creatures.

Kaen makes for a natural performer ; they love music and musicality is a valuable trait in The Wyrd.

Important Names

Drachmah - Kaen’s family soothsayer, someone they trust and rely on dearly.

Allyra - Kaen’s appointed guardswoman and eventual lover ( deceased ) .  In the beginning Allyra confessed to Kaen she despised them and would rather be working to protect any of the other god-children.  Much of their romance is centric to the two of them bonding overtime ; a slow-burn as they realize neither are what they seem , and Kaen finds their way into Allyra’s heart.  The two were oftentimes getting into hijinks ; running away from the Citadel into bordering townships , exploring the Outer-Wilds , hiding from Seekers… You name it.  Before Allyra died , the two performed a bonding rite ; a wound Kaen will never quite heal from.

Seekers - Large dog-like golems made by Cernunnos ; hunting creatures designed specifically to track whatever it is he asks them to.  These days , they’re used to chase down Kaen and bring them home.

Cernunnos - Kaen’s father ; often reveals himself uninvited in Thra to convince them they are wrongly challenging Fate and should come home , believing they are fighting for a war that is not theirs.

#❧ ━ ❝ ch. KAEN || verse vi: TDC ❞ ━ ☙ #oTL #i've done it #this is... #all the information i can think of #FOR NOW #i'll probably add more later but rn this is what i've got #the basics and necessities as you will #there's obviously more i can say abt why kaen is in thra #or more i can say abt their relationship to their father #but that's... #too much work for my baby gamer brain atm #for all 2.5 of you who write for the tdc fandom #this is for y'all

[strywoven-moved]

@theydefy​ asked : ❝  we’re  a  family  now.❞ // kylan to kaen <3

𝑷��𝒐𝒎𝒑𝒕𝒆𝒅.

          FAMILY—  A word that had little meaning ‘til now.  They never felt at place ( at peace ) in The Wyrd , but have – by some stroke of unfortunate Fate – found a meaning and a h o m e in Thra ( a world that did not belong to them , did not breathe life into them , but all the same sung to their soul & lived in their heart ) .  By proxy of the gelfling , by forging now such lasting b o n d s with these otherworld creatures , the godling at LAST UNDERSTANDS the full merit of what Kylan implies ; and so many times have they returned the sentiment , so many times have they held the hands of the others and spoken thus , ‘brother’ , ‘sister’ , ‘lover’—  But none of them quite compared to the measure of faith and trust they have vested most entirely into Kylan.  Him , the f i r s t to welcome them ; him , the f i r s t to bridge the divide ‘tween god-creature and other-creature ; and he , the one who f i r s t found a place in their heart and said , i don’t mind making a place here , in fact it is quite nice.

          For a moment , there is silence – though not a disrespect nor a discomfort , but a mindfulness that overtakes the sweet doe as they again take in his offering ; savoring , perhaps , what little grace it still provides them despite how they both understand the inevitable.  Taking a breath , as if able to breathe in his love further , Kaen opens their eyes to look at him , smiling sleepily.  “Ye’ve been tellin’ me tha’ a lot lately,” They whisper , letting the god-speak drift easily ‘round their words , lilting it in gentle musicality.  “‘S almost like y’re worried ‘bout somethin’.”  Which in turn worries them.  They watch him , looking for any sign they’ve struck the quick of the t r u t h .  Finding nothing , they laugh softly , reaching out to lay a hand to his cheek.

           “Maybe Ah’m th’ one lookin’ too far inta’ it.  Ah think e’rythin’s startin’ ta’ take a toll on me.”  Something not easily said in the presence of their comrades , but Kylan deserves them at their most h o n e s t and vulnerable.  “It’ll be okay , though , Ah know it will.”  Spoken more for their sake than his.  Hand shifts , reaching for his tucked ‘tween them , intermingles their digits and pulls it close to rest his touch over their heart which beats even still STRONG & STEADY in their breast , humming faintly alongside the song of Thra.  “But we are family , Kylan , we are.  Ah wun’ let anythin’ change tha’.  Ah’ll always…”  A pause to yawn , eyes closing again , the dim glow they’ve been giving off for his sake beginning to go dark as sleep starts to drag them away , “... Love ye… Always…”  And even unconscious , their grip on his hand remains s e c u r e ; the reminder that they , too , speak in earnest – they’ll never let him go , perhaps not even in death.

#❧ ━ ❝ OOC || maybe QUEUE really are just some forgotten story in the end || queue ❞ ━ ☙ #❧ ━ ❝ ch. KAEN || answered ❞ ━ ☙ #❧ ━ ❝ ch. KAEN || verse vi: TDC ❞ ━ ☙ #theydefy #theydefy || kylan #i'm gonna get cavities over here GOD

[strywoven-moved]

@theydefy​ asked : ❛ i guess we both lost something we were fond of. ❜  // kylan to kaen!

𝑷𝒓𝒐𝒎𝒑𝒕𝒆𝒅.

          It is still foreign to them to be allowed to c r y so freely , so plainly ; tears feel strange on their always-dry cheeks , catching ‘round stones and falling in some sorrowed downpour to an open lap.  Once it starts , they know it shall be quite h a r d to stop — after all , they spend more time than they should on holding their emotions at bay , keeping each one carefully controlled / constrained so nothing breaks the exterior of gefling’s so-called BEACON ( a weakness , they were told once in reprimand , you are weak ; a good soldier does not sit & sob , they stand & fight ! ) .  For better or worse , Kaen learned to keep their heart q u i e t e r than necessary.  But here , far out of reach of the despondent Lessers , the godling knows a meager safety in showing the cracks ‘neath their charade.  And they are sure Kylan would be the least likely to judge them for such a thing ( in fact , they are sure kylan is one of the few who would rise to challenge this repressive logic they’ve been vested with ) .

          Without much warning , they reach for their little brother , gathering him up as if one of their once-toys and holding him CLOSE & TIGHT to their breast ( the thought rises : mind your strength , sweet creature , you could crush him if you are not careful enough ) .  After a moment , Kaen loosens their grip , allowing Kylan to sit comfortably in their lap.  They smile at him , fixing his hair from the way they accidentally messed it.  “We ‘ave , aye.  An’ Ah’m n- not sure tha’ th’ losses get easier each time ‘r ye jus’ learn ta’ handle it better.  Either way … Ah’m still waitin’ fer th’ grief ta’ pass.”  Perhaps , though , that was their own fault ; loving so much , and so DEEPLY / FULLY — every death struck them in a way that felt like a piece of them continued to get taken away without their permission ( first with allyra , now here where loss was so constant it seemed inescapable — ) .  A sniffle , hand lifting to rub their eyes with their sleeve.  “B- but we still ‘ave each other , so tha’s worth somethin’.”  Or so they want to believe it is.  Nothing is quite as s i m p l e anymore , but they’ve never been more sure of anything in their life : Kylan is their family , nothing would change that , not even the war that continues to take everything away.  “Ah- Ah’m right grateful , y’know , ta’ ‘ave ye , Kylan.  Ah’m not sure wha’ Ah’d do without ye sometimes,” They admit with a small laugh.  

#❧ ━ ❝ OOC || maybe QUEUE really are just some forgotten story in the end || queue ❞ ━ ☙ #❧ ━ ❝ ch. KAEN || answered ❞ ━ ☙ #❧ ━ ❝ ch. KAEN || verse vi: TDC ❞ ━ ☙ #theydefy #theydefy || kylan

[strywoven-moved]

Let’s discuss more about Allyra’s death !

Prior to Allyra being deployed for service , Kaen proposed they perform a bonding rite.  You may be thinking , ‘mav , isn’t that essentially just them mating ?’ and to that I say : no , no it’s certainly not.  What this does is INTERTWINE THE THREADS of the two parties involved.  Considering Kaen is already in part a mystic themself , they knew what this would likely mean.  Bonding with someone , weaving your fate-lines together , is - unsurprisingly - a VERY SACRED rite reserved only for the gods and their chosen few ( note : it doesn’t have to be romantic in nature , some of the Lessers have bonded with beloved underlings to keep them safe ; to-date , Cernunnos has only performed the rite himself twice ) .  Doing this offers an exchange of strength as well as weakness ; if Kaen is hurt , Allyra is hurt and vice-versa.  Kaen doing this IMMEDIATELY BEFORE Allyra is sent to fight for their clan is … Immensely reckless , and further supports the idea that the two’s tryst was frowned upon by the Council.  Kaen , however , quells Allyra’s disbelief by reminding her they’re doing it with GOOD INTENTIONS ( and assuredly they are , but the timing is horrible ) .

After performing the rite , after spending the night together , Allyra is sent off come dawn.  Kaen would later say their biggest regret is NOT saying they loved her when she left and instead simply telling her good-bye ; be well ; come home to me.  But , being a mystic , there’s a foreboding in them when they speak , when they watch her go with the others-- Something’s not well here and the threads are not as secure as they once were before.  Kaen , unfortunately , ignores this and pushes it aside.

Per the rite , Kaen is awoken some several days later into the campaign , in immense pain.  Immediately they seek Drachmah and they confess what they did.  He is frankly displeased ( but not shocked ) .  The elder soothsayer offers as much help as he can , attempting to keep them calm , but the pain is indescribable and tears through the godling’s abdomen , leaving a trail where Allyra’s been cut down.  Kaen hears it - faintly , like a vision just out of reach - Allyra , in her remaining words saying she is “no longer afraid of death,” a feat Kaen themself claimed to be capable of and taught her through their time together.

Cernunnos is rightly upset when he discovers this.  He tells Kaen that out of respect for Allyra’s family , they must be the one to stand for the gods and speak over the body through the funeral , as well as to bestow the boon onto the survivors.  Kaen believes this is punishment , and they’re not entirely wrong.

Allyra’s family - a proud sort of fae-like avians , known for their rich heritage of battle - are exceptionally grateful for Kaen’s being there.  In return , they present the godling with Allyra’s lance and although Kaen says they cannot accept such a token , the family insists.

After all is done , Kaen gives Allyra’s prized lance a place of reverence upon the wall in their room , crossed together with their first axe.  Kaen , to this day , still sustains the wound ‘cross their stomach and left-side.  Although much more subtle now , it never fails to upset them if brought up in conversation.  Oftentimes , Kaen wonders if they made a very grave mistake bonding themself to Allyra ; if , beyond that , loving so deeply was a mistake- if the grief it sowed was worth it.  Kaen has since then never permitted the Council to assign the another of the ranks to take Allyra’s place , believing rather firmly that no-one else was able to fill the role.

#❧ ━ ❝ ch. KAEN || headcanons ❞ ━ ☙ #❧ ━ ❝ ch. KAEN || verse vi: TDC ❞ ━ ☙ #death tw #like i said several hours ago #this is all i'll be talking abt #for awhile

[strywoven-moved]

@crystalcracked asked : ❛ what can you do but hold your hand out in the dark ? ❜ // kylan to kaen!

𝑷𝒓𝒐𝒎𝒑𝒕𝒆𝒅.

“Hold out yer ‘and …” Momentarily looks up , ears perking. “... In th’ dark …” Mumbling , repeating the words without LISTENING to them , without paying them any mind. Frowning , they look back down to the reading in their lap. Forgive them , won’t you ? They’ve no intention to be r u d e , most especially not to Kylan. It seems they are still scorned for being DISCHARGED from the frontlines. Rian intends for them to see reason – and this , he perhaps believes , might be the only way to do it , to r e m o v e them from harm’s way until they find sense – though if the doe were some shades less respectful or less loyal , there would be n o t h i n g the good Captain could do to keep them from their place beside the others in the war ( somehow , they sense he knows this ; it weighs over them like a shadow , a constant reminder of the blood which divides them — he is nothing , it says , but you are everything ) . But , if they can provide no service THERE , they could be of some help HERE , for Kylan and his studies ( the nuisance of language be-damned ) . After all , there were t w o sides to every coin , and there was a time when retainers would have argued that Kaen would have been a beloved scholar-king rather than a warlord.

The tome they have is handled gingerly , with great care , as if one of their own. A lender from – oh , they are t e r r i b l e with names ! – was it Dyn’lo ? The Forgemaster. A strange creature ( as if they’ve any room to talk ) , but incredibly intelligent. Scarred fingers trace over the sketchings and scrawls on the pages unfurled in their lap. He was kind enough to give them some materials for their own magic , a book that might help them learn how to further harness their geomancy ( or , at the very least , give them a few ideas & a push in the right direction ) . Each turn of the weathered text intrigued them further ; between their own god-magic and the Dustling’s forging aptitude … It might be plausible to COMBINE both attributes in the name of the Resistance. If they could do that , they might be able to m a k e things that could silence not only the Order but the Skeksis threats at once — ! Still , they ought to be c a r e f u l ; the stronger the magic , the higher the price which demanded to be repaid.

Pulling out of their musings , they glance over to Kylan ( though it might’ve only been but a moment or two since he spoke his piece , kaen can’t help but feel guilty for ignoring him ) . They offer up an apologetic smile – however unnecessary – shifting to place the borrowed grimoire atop the desk in front of them with a satisfying THUMP . “So , ye said … Ta’ hold out yer ‘and in th’ dark ?” They turn in their spot , resting elbow ‘pon the knee and propping chin in their palm. “D’ye mean reachin’ out ta’ one’s OWN dark ‘r reachin’ out ta’- ta’ others in the dark ?” There was indeed a difference , they figured , and each required a different sect of strength to endure. “Kylan,” Kaen begins tentatively , frowning a bit , ears lowering. “Ah agree wit’ ye , Ah believe tha’ people need a ‘and ta’ reach fer ; tha’ e’ryone’s got th’ potential ta’ be pulled back inta’ th’ light but…” They shake their head. “Ah mean no offense when Ah say Ah also believe we cannae save e’ryone , either. Sometimes- sometimes there’s nothin’ t’be done. Darkness ‘s all they are , an’ we mus’ accept tha’.”

#❧ ━ ❝ ooc || maybe queue really are just some forgotten story in the end || queue ❞ ━ ☙ #crystalcracked #crystalcracked || kylan #❧ ━ ❝ ch. KAEN || answered ❞ ━ ☙ #❧ ━ ❝ ch. KAEN || verse vi: TDC ❞ ━ ☙

[strywoven-moved]

@crystalcracked asked : ❛ nothing makes me happier and nothing makes me sadder than you. ❜ // gurjin to kaen!

𝑷𝒓𝒐𝒎𝒑𝒕𝒆𝒅.

Nothing … Makes him SADDER ?  Where perhaps the godling would have typically had something clever to say – a quip , or even some upbeat nonsense to brush aside the souring tension – they seem now REMARKABLY SILENT ; a rash tongue rendered tame by Gurjin’s honesty.  After a moment ( more like several ) , Kaen sits up from the bedding , unable to keep watching him ( & what were they waiting for exactly ? a resolution ? something more to be said ? ) .  The sheets sustaining their modesty spill off them in a flighty furl , collecting in a cotton-knit pool ‘round their bare waist.  Idly , they pluck at the threads of their braid ( tangled with beads & feathers on behalf of kylan & their fellows ) , eyes downcast to their lap and features etched with contemplative c o n c e r n .  On purpose , they DIM their glow , shrouding them both in darkness ; as p u n i s h m e n t , they do not want to be seen.  This , not an act of retaliation unto him , but to save whatever meager pride they have , to save themself from showing off how HURT they are by the drenchen’s words ( they feel it , the sting in their eyes & force it back ‘fore those crystal tears dare to cross their cheeks – they will not , shall not , cry for this ! yet it burdens them no less ) .

What could they say to something like that ?  Verily he was waiting for them to reply— Not to sit there like a fool and pretend not to be SOBBING over it.  It’s his hand grazing over their stone-flecked back that rouses them from their stupor ( he knows , they think , it’s not so easy to hide from him ) .  Each gem his fingers happen to fall across respond to his touch , HUMMING & GLEAMING , bringing them back into the light.  Kaen takes a breath , blinking a few times and turning their antlered head to look at him.  “... Ah … Ah make ye SAD , Gurjin ?”  There it is , a note of telltale p a i n in their tone.  One they don’t make to quiet or dismiss.  “What d’ye mean ?”  Neverminding how they make him the most HAPPY , it’s the sorrow they’ve fixated on , the thing the can’t seem to avoid — not with him , not with Rian , not with Kylan … not even with their father.  W h y ?  As if Gurjin had the answer to such a demanding , powerful question.  They reach out to him , pressing a hand to his cheek.  Their smile wavers , their vision blurs again.  “Ah’m sorreh fer tha’... Ah dunno tha’ it can- can be helped.”  Like they cannot quite help the slight weeping hitch in their voice , the a w f u l knowing that this was how it was going to be.

#❧ ━ ❝ ooc || maybe queue really are just some forgotten story in the end || queue ❞ ━ ☙ #❧ ━ ❝ ch. kaen || answered ❞ ━ ☙ #❧ ━ ❝ ch. KAEN || verse vi: TDC ❞ ━ ☙ #crystalcracked #crystalcracked || gurjin #you come into my house #the house of [redacted] #and you make me sad ? #get AWAY from me moogle #but don't actually this is great it's my favorite flavor

[strywoven-moved]

@crystalcracked asked : ❝ oh , you must tell me the songs you know . i’d love to hear them . ❞ // kylan to kaen !

𝑷𝒓𝒐𝒎𝒑𝒕𝒆𝒅.

“Hear ‘em ?”  Can’t quite help the free-falling notes of a giggle which topples ‘round own echoed query ( indeed , a strange thing for him to say ! ) .  Kaen lifts a hand , gingerly ruffling the other’s neatly-kept hair.  What they say next is the least bit teasing , lilted by lighthearted pleasantness so rarely found of late ( a marker of kylan’s ability to draw their nature forth ; to dig to the quick & summon their good spiritedness ) , “Kylan , dun’ Ah sing ta’ ye a’most e’ry night ?”  A promise they’ve aspired to keep since they decided he was THEIR BROTHER ; his demons quelled by song , by the lullabies Kaen remembers in faint and fainter memories ( a once-mother holding her faun , abolishing their fears & singing them to sleep in a voice kaen only vaguely recognizes now ) .  “Ah s’ppose y’re not really askin’ ‘bout those old lullabies , though , huh ?”  Antlered head cocks curiously at him , red brows lifting.  They assume not , anyways.  He surely seeks the other songs they know from The Wyrd ( & there are many which rise to mind ) .

Carefully reaching ‘round him perched there in the loose fold of their legs , Kaen plucks up their PAN FLUTE ( ironically a gift from their father , a subtle endorsement of their interest in performing arts ) .  Bringing it to their lips , they play a lulling , trailing m e l a n c h o l y melody.  “Bein’ in th’ resistance reminds me o’ th’ sad songs most.”  The ones the forces would sing to each other in the dark of the night , Allyra mentioned , to restore resolve and enforce morale.  “... An’ th’ song Ah performed fer Allyra’s funerary rites , o’course.”  Distant expression overcomes them , eyes glazing momentarily as they stare OFF & AWAY to some unseen horizon back home.  Blinking out of the trance , they look back down to Kylan , “Not all o’ ‘em are sad , we’ve got some folk songs , too.”  Heard in their time sneaking into taverns , away from the confines of the Citadel , in the evenings commingling with the Folk and feigning they were SOMEONE ELSE for awhile ( someone normal ) . 

Smile is easily replaced , lighting up their stony features.  “Ah’d l o v e ta’ teach ‘em ta’ ye,” Spoken with an excitable nod.  “But ye’ll ‘ave ta’ do somethin’ fer me , aye ?  Teach me th’ songs ye know , too !  E’en in gelfling , Ah wanna …”  They were going to say ‘ take them home with me ’ but stop themself , frowning momentarily ( i’m not going to make it home , am i ? ) .  “... Ah wanna ‘ave somethin’ else ta’ share wit’ ye.  Like our own lil’ secret !”  Though it’s never been a secret the two of them were each musically inclined ; stirring the spirits of their company through the way of s o n g .  “Perhaps we can also … Make a song fer each other.”  Something about them , the godling means to say ; about an impossible bond , an impossible FAMILY .  Perhaps then … No-one would forget either of them.

#❧ ━ ❝ ooc || maybe queue really are just some forgotten story in the end || queue ❞ ━ ☙ #❧ ━ ❝ ch. kaen || answered ❞ ━ ☙ #❧ ━ ❝ ch. KAEN || verse vi: TDC ❞ ━ ☙ #crystalcracked #crystalcracked || kylan

[strywoven-moved]

@theydefy​ asked : ❝ you’ve just seemed … different , is all . ❞ // kylan to kaen !

𝑷𝒓𝒐𝒎𝒑𝒕𝒆𝒅.

          DIFFERENT—  Though the comment may’ve been benign , the godling shows what can only be a look of f e a r , as if Kylan’s held a looking-glass to them and all but offered them to look at their reflection - to truly indulge , to truly SEE FOR THEMSELF what sort of new beast they have become ( & they want terribly to turn away from it , to tell him they see nothing , to tell him nothing has changed— ) .  And it is in that unseen mirror they notice that war has done m u c h to them ; BROKEN & ALTERED them in such a way that transfigures them into someone nearly unrecognizable from themself ( their light remains ; their kindness remains ; but their heart , their mind , their soul have all undergone a transformation / an evolution ) .

          Eyes are quick to depart the younger’s face , eager to break the spell and havoc his words have wreaked ‘pon them.  Their hands … Are not their hands any longer , Kaen notices , the softness in them long hewn away by scarring and battle-ready roughness ; there is now an always-there p u l s e of fire lingering ‘neath their flesh and tinging their touch.  Scarred digits clench tight together , a soft sigh leaving them.  “... In what way ?”  A question they’re not quite sure they w a n t the answer to , but an answer that m u s t be heard regardless.

          Gaze rises , peering through the veil of red lashes , giving the impression of someone YOUNGER & QUIETER than the creature they have been forged into of late.  “... Ah’m —” Voice hitches in a way to suggest e m o t i o n coming caught on their words , “Ah’m sorreh.  Ah know Ah- Ah must’ve CHANGED but Ah…”  But you w h a t , sweet doe ?  Stayed the course despite yourself ?  Discarded and destroyed the pieces of you that would not serve someone who f i g h t s and handles war ?  They shake their head ; they cannot bring themself to say they are STILL THEMSELF , that they are still at all WHOLE as they were when first they’d come to Thra and first spun songs with Kylan— It is now so very u n t r u e .  “Ye will love me jus’ th’ same , wun’ ye , Kylan ?  Even so ?”  A few blinks , a few tears springing free and hitting their lap as shimmering crystals , dancing to the ground in solidified sorrow , toppling away from them in delicate , grieving motion.

#❧ ━ ❝ OOC || maybe QUEUE really are just some forgotten story in the end || queue ❞ ━ ☙ #❧ ━ ❝ ch. KAEN || answered ❞ ━ ☙ #❧ ━ ❝ ch. KAEN || verse vi: TDC ❞ ━ ☙ #theydefy #theydefy || kylan

[strywoven-moved]

@theydefy​ asked : ‘ but what else is there to hope for? ’  // rian to kaen!

A prompt I lost IDK .

          What …                              ELSE … ?

          Such inquisition gives the godling pause , antlered head tipping just so to their shoulder as they mull over the words.  And a funny thing , too , to ask THEM of h o p e ; what it is , what there was of it left to cling to— Kaen knew many a thing about it.  How , when vested in the hearts of the many , it became a force – second to love , contrary to fear – that could drive and empower all of them.  But Rian … Asks them w h a t there is , specifically , to hope for ; what there is that he can set his faith in amidst such a faith-rending cause.  For that , Kaen is not sure they’ve got an answer worth voicing ( & verily quite a fair few come to mind ) .  Rather , none that may quiet his concerns ; none that may absolve him of his own demons they know he possesses.

            Thoughtful is their expression , but their eyes are downcast and uncertain , features t e n s i n g the longer the silence stretches them further APART ( almost palpable , like a great hand come to tear them each away from one another ) .  It is in that expanding interval of mounting silence that Kaen chances to lift their eyes , to REACH FOR Rian , who stands with his back to them , resting scarred hand ‘pon a shoulder and asking him gently to turn ‘round.  “Ah’m not sure Ah understand,” They reply at last , voice quiet and softened , “Are ye askin’ me sincerely ‘r are ye speakin’ ta’ th’ wind agane ?”  After all , they’ve known him to speak into the aether once or twice , not exactly seeking an answer despite how they would’ve liked to provide one.  Kaen smiles , features a l i g h t i n g in their usual way , though how they smile for him is especially FOND , isn’t it ?  As if to always wordlessly tell him they love him without outright saying the phrase.  “If ye wan’ m’honest opinion , Ah think … There’s a lot left ta’ hope fer.  ‘Cause e’en if our stories are ta’ end , it wun’ r e a l l y be th’ end , will it ?  It’ll keep bein’ writin’ , it’ll keep fightin’.  Ye’ll see.”  An OPTIMISITIC NOTION if ever there was one to be heard , but would it hold ?  Would it prove to be true ?  Kaen seems convinced , at least , and they hope even the barest offering of positive outlook might help their beloved along as well.

#❧ ━ ❝ OOC || maybe QUEUE really are just some forgotten story in the end || queue ❞ ━ ☙ #❧ ━ ❝ ch. KAEN || answered ❞ ━ ☙ #❧ ━ ❝ ch. KAEN || verse vi: TDC ❞ ━ ☙ #theydefy #theydefy || rian

[strywoven-moved]

@theydefy​ asked : ❛ please - don’t do this. ❜  // rian to kaen!

𝑷𝒓𝒐𝒎𝒑𝒕𝒆𝒅.

          The words fall as stones in a nigh bottomless wellspring , the ripples from each PLEAD sending echoes of d e s p e r a t i o n that shakes the godling to their core ( how they feel their heart tremble & break with the force of his voice no matter how quietly he’s spoken his piece ) .  In the moment , he’s secured a grip on them , managed to catch their collar and turn them back ‘round ‘fore they got up again.  The expression Rian wears is one Kaen has become truly – intimately – FAMILIAR with lately ; he shows no aggression , not even a trace of hardness , there is instead an obvious pain in him , an urgence to convince them they have done ENOUGH ( but it is not ! it is not , can’t he see ?! no matter what they do , it is all in vain ! )— How many has he lost , now ?  How many m o r e would he be forced to let go of ?  And Kaen , even so , seems likely to be a n o t h e r he must love and lose.

           How terribly they want to hold him , to assure him they will stop ‘fore it is too late— But the words that come to them , that stand to rise in their voice seem disingenuous.  None of what they h o p e to tell Rian would come from an h o n e s t place , not even from their heart.  And both ought to know better ; the godling is RELENTLESS in their design , in their damningly set conviction that so readily – so w i l l i n g l y – pushes them into a self-dug grave ( it looms over them , lording over all they do : you’ve set your path , sweet thing , now pay your penance to it ) .

          Breath comes ragged , shaken , pulling strained from bleeding lips.  Own dark eyes seem to pierce the dark veil of the night shrouding them , looking not AT but THROUGH , deep and deeper still into their beloved stonewood with a gaze that is distraught and w i l d with rising uncertainty.  “Don’t …”  Kaen repeats in a gruff voice , the tone of it roughened from their mounting exhaustion.  Hand rises , clasping fire-touched fingers ‘round his wrist ; they don’t intend to b u r n him , but their magic is already coursing through them , singing his flesh inadvertently.  Their grip t i g h t e n s by dangerous margins ( careful , mind yourself – a voice now-distant warns , resting an easing touch ‘gainst their hand ) , a strength that remains behind even after all they’ve prior endured.  Kaen leans forward , ears pinned , lip curled back from sharpened teeth.  Words are thus pronounced , punctuated each in turn , slow and with purposeful delivery.  “I … MUST … Rian.”  Not even a thought to reconsider , they’re prying his hand away and making to stand despite how their body ACHES & TREMBLES when they rise to their feet.  It will lend to their inevitable destruction , they know , but at least they did everything they could.

#❧ ━ ❝ OOC || maybe QUEUE really are just some forgotten story in the end || queue ❞ ━ ☙ #❧ ━ ❝ ch. KAEN || answered ❞ ━ ☙ #❧ ━ ❝ ch. KAEN || verse vi: TDC ❞ ━ ☙ #theydefy #theydefy || rian #this... hurt to write actually #so fuck you first of all

[strywoven-moved]

@voxcrystallis​ asked : ❝ it’ll be difficult. difficulties are to be expected. ❞  -  Ghealan to Kaen ^^

𝑷𝒓𝒐𝒎𝒑𝒕𝒆𝒅.

          Steady gait comes to pause , shoulder turning to look towards the younger paladin.  “Ah think y’re passin’ th’ wisdom ta’ th’ wrong person , Ghealan,” Spoken in jest , of course , the godling knows he means well.  Antlered head tips slightly , ears flicking.  “Has facin’ difficulties stopped any o’ us b’fore ?”  Eyes drift to the wayside as thoughts do the same , their voice carrying off in contemplation , caught in a strange OTHERWORLDLY HUM tangling their speech they still cannot quite hide ,  “Ah wager ‘s gonna get ‘arder than easier from this point on.  Makin’ e’en th’ barest o’ victories ones ta’ be treasured.”  Times of peace , too ; those rarer and rarer occasions allotted for solace would become increasingly s c a n t the longer the battle goes ( kaen’s own lightbringing presence would be sure to suffer the consequences if not yielding to caution – as they never seem to ) .

            Their march onward resumes , paces slow enough to allow the smaller other to more easily keep pace with such l a r g e and domineering strides.  “Difficulties ‘re ta’ be expected,” Conversation carries on easily , though they are not more than acquaintances at best ( kaen treats the paladin like the others – a familiar companion ; a member of an unspoken family they’ve sworn themself to ) .  “No-one e’er said war was gonna be e a s y , did they ?”  They reach out , gently clasping Ghealan on the shoulder , an assuring grin therein offered.  “We’re p r e p a r e d fer difficulties , aye ?”  Mostly , at least.  Kaen leans down , lowering their voice , “An’ Ah’d be willin’ ta’ believe y’re not th’ sort ta’ let those worries hinder yer spirit n’ sword , aye ?”  Straightening , pulling their hand away , they continue , “B’sides , Ah think th’ challenges keep things interestin’.”  That was certainly ONE WAY of looking at it.  After a moment , they look down to him again.  “‘S tha’ really wha’s on yer mind ?  Y’re welcome ta’ tell me otherwise , y’know.”  Perhaps prying , but the godling was always willing to listen to concerns of the others – a n o b l e endeavor , a near-selfless cause to thwart the scourge of inevitable despair.

#❧ ━ ❝ OOC || maybe QUEUE really are just some forgotten story in the end || queue ❞ ━ ☙ #❧ ━ ❝ ch. KAEN || answered ❞ ━ ☙ #❧ ━ ❝ ch. KAEN || verse vi: TDC ❞ ━ ☙ #voxcrystallis #voxcrystallis || ghealan

[strywoven-moved]

@voxcrystallis​ asked : ❝ when one door closes, another opens. ❞  - Deet to Kaen, maybe?

𝑷𝒓𝒐𝒎𝒑𝒕𝒆𝒅.

          Times of strife bring hearts together ( so kaen has been told , listening in on the gossip from the warbeaten in the citadel ) , but they never knew it to be t r u e until they came to Thra and experienced the phenomena for themself ; how very OPEN their heart has been , offering a measure of solace to others who fight alongside them – but strange is it to have someone who sits with them now and says : say your piece , kaen , you seem tired.  Are they ?  They hadn’t noticed ( hadn’t acknowledged it much beyond the few moments of stolen reprieve ) .  So it goes , the godling takes the opportunity to sit beside Deet – less and less a stranger to them lately – and indulge in conversation.

          What she offers in return are words they have heard before , but somehow it means m o r e coming from such a kind , earnest voice.  Ears perk upright , sapphire gaze lifting to fix upon the other.  It can’t be helped , Kaen returns her smile.  “Y’re right , Deet , an’ Ah shouldnae be tryin’ so ‘ard ta’ keep openin’ a door tha’s already been closed.”  They sigh , suddenly confronted by the error of their ways.  Without thinking , Kaen turns , bringing the smaller creature into an embrace – their hold is STRONG & WARM , but brief , soon letting her free with a soft laugh.  “Oh - Ah’m sorreh !”  They forget not everyone is as openly physical as they would be.  “Thank ye , though , fer e’rythin’.”  For listening to them , for giving them something to consider going forward— Each , valuable facets of friendship they so oft’ find lacking.  Soon , Kaen stands up , picking up their axe which was set ‘gainst a nearby tree.  “So , wha’d’ye say we go an’ find tha’ door ?”  Surely this doe does not anticipate finding a LITERAL DOOR ( though we must assume if one does not exist they’d likely make one ) ?  They give her a grin , bright and beaming , the stones dappling their cheeks charmed with renewed l i g h t .  “Together this time !”  Together — What a powerful affirmation ; but the godling means it all the same ( after all , where they go , they hope deet would be sure to follow ! ) .

#❧ ━ ❝ OOC || maybe QUEUE really are just some forgotten story in the end || queue ❞ ━ ☙ #❧ ━ ❝ ch. KAEN || answered ❞ ━ ☙ #❧ ━ ❝ ch. KAEN || verse vi: TDC ❞ ━ ☙ #voxcrystallis #voxcrystallis || deet #*leans real close to the mic* i'm pushing the propaganda of these two being friends #also yes hi hello #welcome!!

[strywoven-moved]

@theydefy​ asked : ❝  i  love  it  when  you  talk  like  that. ❞ // gurjin to kaen ~ flirtatiously ~

𝑷𝒓𝒐𝒎𝒑𝒕𝒆𝒅.

          The laughter that follows is a RICH & HEARTY , like plucking the humor right from the h e a r t of the earth ; it rises out of them almost like a song , each note its own full-bodied measure , infectious in its sincere joy ( a rarer & rarer commodity these days ; the godling’s light shines like a beacon to many ; their presence the remedy amid much despair & destruction , always bright & brilliant ) .  And to Gurjin , they share the wealth — blessing him with a playful air and the g l e a m of charmed radiance catching in speckled stones ‘pon their cheeks already full of their grinning maw.  Indeed , they cannot help themself !  Indulging him as they do ( sometimes not even where only their own ears can hear , the little mongrels— ) , entertaining and perpetuating his desires which so deliberately cultivate their own.  But Kaen knows , as they’ve seen , that his heart is much deeper than shallow perversions ; desire was one thing , l o v e or true emotion was always another.  And the godling was not sure when the lines ‘tween the two became so blurred with Gurjin — nor do they think to stop and ask , rather they simply let it loose , let it live and t h r i v e and do with them what it will.

         “Ye like tha’ , aye ?”  Chin lifts almost proudly , ears flicking upright.  “But ‘s no different from wha’ ye can be caught sayin’ now ‘s it ?”  Teasing , of course.  Kaen snorts , reaching out from where they sit to lace the scarred fingers of one hand at his nape and give him a pull f o r w a r d .  They ask him to be closer without the suggestion that he can say no.  Quite the same , isn’t it ?  Ever since he gave them the encouragement to be so BOLD & DEVIOUS , he’s never known peace ( not that the faun has once heard him complain , quite the opposite ) .  “An’ wha’ good ‘re promises if Ah dun’ make good on ‘em ?”  Nails scrape skin , the barest of pressure applied - a subtle reminder of their strength as the hint of h e a t leaks from their touch and into flesh , rippling pleasantly down the spine ( an idle threat , too , the notion that if they wanted they could hurt him ; it’s a careful ploy they’ve done many a time before , though they know he won’t cow easily ) .

          Head tips away , denying him their lips in favor of whispering at a perked ear , “If ye play n i c e t’day , Ah could make ‘em REAL fer ye.”  It goes without saying that they would do so anyways if he simply ASKED , but part of them wants to see him w o r k for the reward first ; they want to make a game of it.

#❧ ━ ❝ OOC || maybe QUEUE really are just some forgotten story in the end || queue ❞ ━ ☙ #❧ ━ ❝ ch. KAEN || answered ❞ ━ ☙ #❧ ━ ❝ ch. KAEN || verse vi: TDC ❞ ━ ☙ #theydefy #theydefy || gurjin #i am once again looking at the reminder that these two are shameless and gross #thanks i hate it

[strywoven-moved]

closed . || @theydefy​

          There is an unusual absence that evening for sup – the godling , who earlier mentioned they were simply taking a moment to recollect their bearings , has NOT SINCE RETURNED .  Quite unlike them to break such a promise , to simply … Disappear ( most especially ‘fore a meal ) and tell no-one of their whereabouts.  But they did not wander far , and the sweet creature is rather easily picked out of the darkening woods for their divine brilliance.

          Kaen’s taken leave for good reason ; they are INJURED , they do not want to raise c o n c e r n with the others ( most especially being relied on so heavily , it would not bode well to see such a mighty creature torn down ) .  With their woven shawl thrown over their folded lap , their fingers collect the idle ripple of blood from the heaving wound marring their breast.  Not so deep , they notice ; they were swift-thinking enough to parry and save themself a much d e a d l i e r scar ( but it hurts no less ) .  Another war-mark for their hide , Kaen thinks , shaking their head , another story to bring home.  Pulling their hand away , they frown at their blood-stained digits – something needs to be done.  Closing their fingers together into a balled fist , their resolve sets : cauterize the wound , you’ve done it before , you can do it again !  Heat courses through them , riles up ‘neath their flesh and conjures into their palm , setting it to i g n i t e .

           No sooner has their hand approached the wound again , the skin already prickling from the oncoming f i r e , then they pause , antlered head raising to attention with senses preened and attuned ( someone’s coming , someone they know — ) .  They dare not move from their spot – besides , where would they be bolting off to ? – and instead wait for the Drenchen to come forward , stepping into the reaches of their illuminating aura so they may better see him.  “Gurjin,” Kaen says , attempting an air of nonchalance as if he’s not just caught them about to do something a w f u l .  “‘Ave Ah taken tha’ long ?”  They didn’t realize they’d been keeping anyone WAITING .  Flame-touched fingers flex idly where they sit stationary over their injury , furred ears lowering.  No use trying to hide yourself now , was there ?  “Ah’ll come along shortly , aye ?  Jus’ lemme fix this firs’.”  FIX IT , they say— Though they wish he’d not be there to watch them do so ( the stench of burning flesh is rather pungent & unpleasant ) .

#❧ ━ ❝ ch. KAEN || threads ❞ ━ ☙ #❧ ━ ❝ ch. KAEN || verse vi: TDC ❞ ━ ☙ #theydefy #theydefy || gurjin #:))) #didn't i say i was predictable?