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charcadett · 1 year

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Hey! So uuhhh 👉👈 if the request is still open, may I ask for Larry with a reader who's capable of becoming a champion but they prefer working another profession instead? Like perhaps as a researcher?

Larry is such a curious character when it comes to being really good at Pokemon battling, so I wonder what he would think being with someone like that. Maybe at one time reader just finished fighting the elite four with ease but they just tap out before they fight the champion? Can be against Paldea's elite four or other region's elite four

With that said thank you for reading this! No pressure, your writing is really cool and I'm fine reading anything you post. Have a nice day!! :DD

Okay, this. Accidentally just became me dissecting Larry’s character like he’s a frog and I am but an over-excitable seventh grader. There’s not a lot about the reader, they’re there, but it’s a lot of Larry. I don’t think I said anything new here and also went totally overboard with this. I just *clenches fist* am obsessed with this guy. I hope you enjoy this anyway!

Livin’ Like Larry (Ft. Reader Who Quits The Elite Test Right Before Fighting Geeta)

- Larry’s interesting in a way because not only does he insist on doing the bare minimum in terms of effort, but he also works enough overtime that he has to be “strictly told” to take a break. He uses Normal-type Pokemon and has a particular fondness for them, however, it’s obvious that he also likes Flying-types. His tie is light blue with a cloud pattern, his ace is Staraptor, and the only time any of his speech is punctuated with an exclamation point is during his Elite Four battle when he’s using Flying-type Pokemon. Not to mention during his gym rematch, he has Braviary on his team, another Normal/Flying-type.

- On top of all that, not only does he give the TM for Facade when you beat him, but during his first Gym Battle when he Terastillizes his Pokemon, he says “I think it’s time to show you that real life isn’t all just being true to yourself...” Larry seems to prioritize comfort over everything else. He keeps himself busy, and he eats good food, which he does enjoy. Where other people enjoy spontaneity and excitement, Larry enjoys a reliable routine. And as much as he seems to dislike his job, he seems too comfortable in it to branch out.

- He’s a normal guy living a normal life surrounded by completely extraordinary and passionate people, which honestly, ends up making him the odd one out. I think if Larry genuinely went all out from the start of a battle, he’d be one of the strongest trainers in Paldea. But he doesn’t. He consistently puts in the bare minimum effort. That’s just what he’s used to and he’d like to dedicate his energy to something he actually enjoys doing. Like eating massive plates of food at the Treasure Eatery.

- Seeing you blow through the Gym Challenge, completely sweep the Elite Four, and then change your mind so suddenly before fighting Geeta was not something he expected. It’s for a simple reason. You changed your mind. This isn’t something you want to do anymore and you have a research project at home calling your name. You apologize and say you had a lot of fun battling everyone – which is really all that matters – but this isn’t for you. And then you go home.

- Larry expects that to be the end of that. He’s not one to dwell, especially not on things that happened at work. But one day, he catches you at the Treasure Eatery, and like when you beat him after his Gym Match, he offers to buy your meal. You chat, just small talk until Larry finally asks you why you quit the Elite Test so suddenly.

- “I wasn’t having fun anymore. I’ve been researching a bit about the Great Crater recently and it’s all I could think about during every battle. I figured, at that point, I should just head home. Has that ever happened to you?”

- It has happened to him. Everyday. The number of times he was daydreaming about what good food he could be eating instead of doing paperwork or battling numbered in the thousands. But Larry only shrugs and says, “Sometimes…” And that was the end of that.

- It isn’t until a certain student at the Academy comes and absolutely wipes the floor with him three times that he really takes it into consideration. He’ll give you a call and see if you wanted to try out a new restaurant he’s had his eye on for a while. Food tastes better when you’re with someone you like.

#pokemon x reader #gym leader larry x reader #elite four larry x reader #larry pokemon #honestly my scalding take is larry is autistic and masks hardcore #which is interesting because everyone in the pokemon world is so eccentric and out there #and larry is so viscerally normal in comparison #anyway #*aims autism laser at him*

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chompskysssalad · 1 month

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i think mental illness is not talked about nearly enough in this niche subset of the undertale community.

and i mean about a few folks! specifically rurik, goth, palette, and lotus.

rurik first cos hes my babygirl 💙 rurik has been confirmed to have ptsd. thats a life altering disorder. one cannot just take some pills and be rid of it like you can with some ear infection.

ptsd is a serious disease, and i think instead of it being swept under the rug, it should become a forefront of his character. i want to see him recover. genuinely recover and not just some "he just got over it " bs ykno? i want to know how it makes him feel, i want to see the decisions he makes because of the disorder. how does this illness change him as a person. we do not see much of that regarding his character.

lotus next bc hes my second babygirl 😋. i cant speak on his "cannon" disorder partly because nekophy rarely talked about him as a character (often resulting in folks having to interpret him on their own, and often being... wrong. looking at all the fellpoth folks from the years of 2017 to 2019) and partly becaue she deleted her original account with 95% of her lotus asks. but what i can dig up is he was abused growing up by f!geno and f!reaper. i can dig up that canonically him and rurik had a rough relationship that often ended in physical violence from both parties.

how does this change him as a person? he is such a bland character if im honest. we were given a character ref and told to do what we gotta do. i want to see him fleshed out (although that will probably never happen!) i want to see what illnesses or disorders he has obtained throughout his life, wether it be from childhood or abusive relationships. how does this affect him as a person and how does this affect his relationships with people? that is a question i think we will never know unless you create your own headcannon for it.

goth next cos hes chillin... goth has always been seen as a shy, awkward, man-child who cant do much for himself. i think thats wrong and i dont mind saying that because i personally cannot stand his creator lolol. goth has so much... potential. he is the son of the god of death, he is no baby that needs his hand held throughout life.

now there is one thing i do like about his original character, and that is the effect he has on relationships. in both a poth and duelette universe, he is smitten and doesnt quite know what to do with himself around the people he has crushes on. i can work with that. i suspect he has some sort of personality disorder just from being in this part of the fandom for so long yknow? this is perhaps getting into headcannon territory which i will get into later (maybe)

palette my beloved, he was the first sans i ever laid my little 9 year old eyes on.... he is much more fleshed out as a character than goth or lotus for SURE. however i suspect that there is one thing that is merely. glossed over. and another folk has talked about it.

he's so autistic dude. not a doubt in my mind. i dont even need to put this in the headcannon section because its so hinted at (even if thats not what the creator was aiming towards)

his emotions, him being so "oblivious", just the way he carries himself... autism dude. and i crave it !! i want it !! i want to see this fully implemented into his character and his personality and his relationships. i want to see how this affects him and the others around him. how does due respond to it? what about goth? hell, even rurik? i crave this. i want more

i would talk about dante and due, but im 99% sure dante has already been fully fleshed out (psychopathy and whatnot) and im honestly.. not sure about due. they're great characters and all but my autism laser pointer is directly on the four i just spoke about (sorry pookies i love yall)

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shadowofadalekmightdeactivate · 5 years

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Sanders Sides Ghostbusters AU

Why? Why not. I should be writing a 1,500 word short story right now but fuCK IT (A side note: unless stated otherwise, everyone is gay. This is obvious why am I even saying this)

Peter Venkman: Roman - The fuck is a gender, he loves everybody. If they have a pretty face he’s game - This has gotten him into trouble time and time again and made him bounce around from job to job until he FINALLY settled down to be a scientist, and even THAT didn’t last more than 2 years - ADHD riddled fucker - Still as snarky as ever but also still dramatic - First time getting slimed? Almost had a meltdown. HE WAS HAVING A BAD ENOUGH DAY ALREADY DAMMIT - That lasted 2.5 seconds until Patton (Ray) said he thought it was cool - Starved for attention but snarks at everyone regardless - Acts like a Prinxiety fusion at times (”love me but fuck off“ is the mentality that comes to mind)

Egon Spengler: Logan - Picture a Logince fusion that’s mostly controlled/led by Logan - The science behind ghosts has been his hyperfixation for y e a r s - He’s also been wanting to be a scientist for years so being a Ghostbuster is like a dream job to him - Used to be an English college professor until Patton roped him into hunting a ghost with him. He’s still not sure how he even met him (though it’s not impossible that Patton just walked up to him and said “Hi I’m Patton do you want to hunt a ghost with me?”) - “Might have Autism. Might not have a soul. We aren’t sure yet“ -quote from Roman - The brains behind the whole thing. He made the siren, the alarm, the proton packs, everything - Remy (Janine) has feelings for him and he Does Not Appreciate It - Did indeed try to drill a hole in his skull. He wanted to make essentially an early version of Bluetooth. Got as far as putting the drill to his head and finding out the thing’s battery had died. Roman was not amused when he asked him for more - This is going to just turn into Egon headcanons if I don’t stop

Ray Stanz: Patton - Has Autism, is lOUD AS FUCK - Has been kicked out of several libraries for this - Eye contact is a no-no. He won’t freak but he will get very nervous - He introduced Logan to Roman, was dismayed when they didn’t get along at first - Basically a little kid with a laser-shooting gun - Main cause of most of the damage at ghost busts - Roman looks up to him a LOT, even though he’s older (but he’d never say that out loud) - Is allergic to everything with fur - Feels pretty bad whenever they have to bust a ghost with a tragic past - Had been begging Logan to let them have some kind of mascot. Logan finally relented and built a kind of cage in the front office for Slimer - (Remy doesn’t appreciate having that thing watching him every day with it’s beady little eyes) - Loves getting covered with whatever crap ghosts may spew at them-slim, ectoplasm, anything. It doesn’t feel sticky to him, more soft like water-hence why he thought it was “so cool” when Roman got slimed. Besides the physical contact thing - Fiercely protective of Virgil (Winston). Heaven help whatever soul that’s dumb enough to taunt that man in his presence because Patton will grab them-with his hands or his proton gun’s stream-and throw them against the most solid thing he can aim for (which has included teammates. Logan was not impressed)

Winston Zeddemore: Virgil - Wanted to be a necromancer when he was a kid, now just wants a job - Trigger-happy when nervous/frightened, causes the second-most amount of damage during busts - Stupidly tried hiding his anxiety from the others at first, writing off any moments of panic as “just paranoia”, “just got startled”, etc. It takes a particularly nasty ghost putting him out of commission via panic attack that he finally opens up to them - Initially wrote off his anxiety out of worry they’d either A. not hire him/fire him or B. treat him like he was made of glass. B almost happened until Logan took his side when Patton was barring him from coming on a bust - Patton and Logan argued viciously over who was in charge of teaching him how to work the proton packs and guns. Virgil was confused as to why they both can’t do it until Roman told him they’re pretty much arguing over who adopts him - (Patton won that battle on the grounds that Logan gets to teach their next employee. Sadly for Logan no one else has taken up the job) - He fucking HATES getting covered in ghost gunk - Some captured ghosts have learned to fear him, he’s pretty scary when he learns their patterns - (I was going to make him a ghost that gets attached to Patton, but...Nah. Four Sides, four Ghostbusters)

Janine Melnitz: Remy - Only took the job because of Logan, likes to call him “Resident Eye Candy” - Logan can not stand him. At all. Remy’s really up front with how he feels about Logan and he finds it over-bearing - He’d wear a skirt if the boys don’t stop him. Hell he’d wear a crop top if they don’t stop him. (They always do. Buggar.) - If he doesn’t have a coffee at any time in the morning he’s a real bastard to whoever gets within 2 feet of him - Roman thinks this is hilarious and will sometimes withhold his coffee order to hear him cuss out people on the phone. He finds it less hilarious when someone tries to sue them for verbal abuse - Patton thought he was blind at first because he always wears sunglasses (”LOGAN WE CAN’T HIRE A BLIND MAN TO TAKE CALLS”)

Dana Barett: Deceit - Trans ftm - “Deceit” is more of a nickname for him, but he’s so used to it that he’s considering making it his legal name - Told off Logan when they first met because he misgendered him four times (the first time was an accident, the second time was a slip up, the last two started seeming intentional) - Legal name is still Dana, he hasn’t have the money or the time to change it yet-which is infuriating - Has heterochromia (left eye brown, right eye green) and vitiligo - Roman thinks he’s drop dead beautiful, Deceit thinks he’s just annoying. Despite this he happily goes on a few flings with him and enjoys the pampering - They don’t officially “get together”, but Roman stops skipping work to take “clients” out on dates, so the other ‘busters are happy - Roman absolutely will tell anyone who listens to him long enough how gorgeous Dee is. Virgil has told Dee about this. Snake man is equal parts flattered and frustrated - Speaking of snakes, he gets two after the Gozer incident: Zuul (female Ball Python) and Vinz (male Corn Snake) - Why he named them after demon dogs is beyond him but he couldn’t think of better names for them

Louis Tully: Remus - Take everything you remember about Louis and throw it out the window. Now go out that window, pick up the remains and stich them back together into a vaguely Louis-like character with bits of rat and garbage left in. That’s Remus. Still awkward beyond help, still a well-meaning hopelessly-in-love fool, but an absolute chaotic MESS that can’t hold down a job for longer than a month - Roman wants to disown him so very badly but there’s no relative left alive that wants to go near that man with a ten-foot pole and SOMEONE has to take care of him - Deceit thinks he’s charming, if a bit...Weird. - Like Deceit, Remus gets two pets after the Gozer incident: Zelda (female Fancy Rat, name is a play on Zuul) and Vince (male Pitbull Terrier, name is a play on Vinz) - He wanted two Pitbulls at first but then saw Zelda in an ad and suddenly decided he HAD to have a rat - The kind of guy that’s a horrible person but really damn good at his job so his co-workers have to put up with him (until the boss fires him for doing something insane like hanging out a window to freak out the people on the streets below) - He actually did the above incident. Twice. He was fired quickly and all window-washing companies were warned about him - Virgil met him a total of one time and said he wanted whatever Remus was high on - Remus, surprisingly, never takes drugs. He finds them icky-not the GOOD icky, like blood and mucus and all that fun stuff. The BAD icky, like forced mood-changes and forgotten events - You can bet your ass he sleeps around like nobody’s business - (I was going to make him Walter Peck but figured it’d be funnier if he was Louis. Be glad he made it in at all)

#Ghostbusters AU #Sanders Sides #TS Remus #sympathetic deceit #redhead writes #roceit #should I write this?#Officially?#cursing

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rainysunshinedaycare · 6 years

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Some T.V. Shows for toddlers

1) Daniel Tiger’s neighborhood ~ A hugely popular reimagination of the classic Mr. Rogers’ characters, the key to Daniel Tiger’s Neighborhood’s impact is the constant repetition of lessons learned in the form on jingles. Whether Daniel — the toddler son of the original series’ tiger puppet — is learning to deal with feelings of jealousy or sadness, adapting to the arrival of a little sister, or finding value in sharing, the straightforward stories allow constant repetition of songs in an effort to help toddlers remember behavioral cues without downplaying the big feelings they’re experiencing.

2) Word Party ~ A collaboration between Netflix and The Jim Henson Company, Word Party’s aim is to help young children expand their vocabulary. Short and sweet, the TV show follows a group of diaper-clad baby animals as they learn new words, frequently turning to the audience — the “big kids,” as they call viewers — to help them learn what words mean and how to use them. It’s cute, quick, and easily digestible for toddlers.

3) Tumble Leaf ~ With its eye-popping stop-motion animation and creative character design, Tumble Leaf’s singular aesthetic alone is enough to warrant viewing, especially for kids and parents fatigued with toddler TV shows’ reliance on computer animation. The show follows a blue fox named Fin as he learns simple science and problem-solving skills in an environment that exists as something of a steampunk Never-Neverland. Though the setting is fantastical, the characters’ use of everyday objects to learn about motion, flight, and other natural sciences sets the show for toddlers apart, and the characters themselves are engaging. Parents will find much to love, especially since the show encourages experimentation after viewing.

4) Dinosaur Train ~ Another Jim Henson Company treasure, Dinosaur Train is required viewing for children who love dinosaurs — in other words, most toddlers and kids. The program follows a family of Pteranodons and their adopted T-Rex sibling as they board a train to visit a different species of dinosaur each episode, learning about their diets, behavior, and more. Each episode is paired with a short segment further exploring real-life science with a live-action paleontologist. The laser focus on species makes each episode a lesson unto itself, especially given the show’s focus on lesser-known beasts.

5) Octonauts ~ A cheeky import from the BBC, Octonauts chronicles the adventures of a group of mammals who descend into the sea to study the life aquatic. The episodes are exciting and full of imaginative imagery as the central characters — a polar bear, a cat, and a penguin outfitted with scuba gear — learn to work together and problem solve while also meeting unique species (narwhals, flying fish) and learning about them. It’s a fun show for toddlers that uses its platform to enrich interest in oceanic sciences, all with wry winks to keep adults entertained along the way.

6) Doc McStuffins ~ With its fifth season set to debut in March, this Disney Junior favorite ticks off a lot of boxes, from engaging songs to cute characters and good-hearted messaging. The series takes place in the imagination of Doc, who spends her days helping mend her sick toys, allowing children an analogue for real-life illness as well as emotional hurdles they might encounter. Each episode includes a “check up” sequence where Doc uses clues around her to make a diagnosis, and eventually teaches her toy friends not only how to mend themselves, but how to deal with their problems and prevent future trouble.

7) Bookaboo ~ A relatively recent addition to Amazon’s growing children’s library, Bookaboo centers on an aloof dog puppet who happens to be the world’s greatest drummer. Trouble is, he has to read a book before he performs. Cue a steady stream of celebrities — actor Michael Sheen, singer Paula Abdul, astronaut Chris Hadfield — who sit down to read with the excited puppet, sending him into a frenzy and running for his drums. It’s essentially an episode-length version of Reading Rainbow’s old story times, and one you can feel good about watching: For each episode produced, the TV show’s producers donate 1,000 books to those in need.

8) Kazoops ~ A show for toddlers focused on the pure, freeing power of a child’s imagination, Kazoops! follows the make-believe adventures of Monty and his best friend, an adorably cuddly pig named Jimmy Jones. Though not as overtly educational as some of the programs on this list, Kazoops! excels in its celebration of the imagination, and the real-world prompts that send the hero’s mind soaring in new directions offer ample fodder for further exploration. The kindle-rock soundtrack that accompanies each episode is guaranteed a place on most families’ playlists.

9) Sesame Street ~ Yes, it’s the most obvious entry on the list. But there’s a good reason: Sesame Street has been the gold standard for children’s entertainment ever since it debuted in 1969, and the show owes much of its longevity to its ability to change with the times. From the introduction of new animation techniques and musical genres to featuring characters on the autism spectrum, Sesame Street remains grounded in the current zeitgeist — and it’s still plenty enjoyable for adults. For those still crying foul that it now airs new episodes on HBO, fear not: PBS still has the entire back catalogue, with new episodes debuting 9 months after their HBO premieres. It seems like a long time to wait for the latest “Cookie’s Crumby Pictures” parody, but it’s worth it.

#mod cheer bear #I hope you like it #I hope this is good #I never dine this before #It’s probably super bad

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russellthornton · 7 years

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People Who Talk Too Much: Why They Do It and How to Handle Them

Listening skills are great, polite, and all that good stuff. But how do you handle the people who talk too much? Here’s how to deal with them.

I’m a good listener, which is a gift and a curse. The gift is I can laser in on the thing everyone yearns for—attention and to be understood. The curse is that… I might end up listening to your endless monologue. Because there are some people who talk too much.

So even though I am a good listener, I don’t give all my time away to attention-craving vampires who want to suck my soul from my-

-wait… I might be exaggerating there, but there’s not much difference when you’re actually caught in a diatribe about the latest this, that, or whatever the hell it is that seems so important to you and therefore me by default…

…man

*wakes up

The mirror neurons, talking too much, and empathy

Let’s start again. Humans are unlike any other animal in how well we empathize with each other. We gain a strikingly accurate sense of how someone’s feeling, almost as if we were them. This seems to be due to the function of ‘mirror neurons’ in the brain.

The idea is, due to mirror neurons, I simply look at your facial expression and body language and roughly gauge what you likely experience as if I were you. So this allows for very intricate connections between people during an interaction *you’d think people would also be able to tell when they speak too long…*

Note: people with autism are more likely to be unsure of how to interpret what the other person might be feeling just by clocking their responses, though they may feel that person’s energies intensely.

But you could also just be a chatterbox who loves to talk, and talk, and talk… zzzzz.

Okay, but is a chatterbox such a bad thing?

I’m awake again… Often you don’t miss what you had until it’s gone. Chances are if someone likes talking with you, they like and trust you. So, getting paranoid about them and making them into ‘the bad person’ *like that grey donkey from Shrek* might not be such a great thing.

And people who talk too much, well, really, anyone can develop the habit of talking a lot. It feels good to be listened to! [Read: 10 ways to be a better listener]

Say you had a friend who was really chatty. Way more chatty than you naturally are. If you just stopped replying to them or started being rude, they might straight up get offended and stop hanging out with you. Later, you might end up realizing that despite the extreme talking in your ear, you actually really enjoyed being around them.

But sometimes people talk in a way that feels overbearing, as if they try to dominate or control you in some way. This type of relationship isn’t worth it and remove myself from those people or dealing with them leads to a 1000% improvement. The question is how do you deal with that person without it blowing up in your face? [Read: 13 creepy signs your friend is secretly an energy vampire]

The people who talk too much

Well, first we need to dive into the reasons why someone might chat LOAADSSS… you know like the saying says—seek to understand first, then to be understood.

#1 They may be a raving lunatic extrovert. This just is what it is. Introversion and extroversion, in the clinical psychology world, are social science based descriptions of personality. Some people like to talk, man. It amps them up, get them excited about life, and gives them energy.

Meanwhile, for others it becomes tiring if overdone. An extremely chatty person could be on the extreme end of extroversion. [Read: Introverts vs. extroverts: Which side are you on?]

#2 They may be narcissistic. To be honest, everyone likes to talk about themselves but most have enough common sense to limit it. If a person seems to make themselves the subject of every conversation they may just be self-indulgent. [Read: Conversational narcissist – Do you love talking and hate listening?]

#3 They may be very articulate. Being able to think and string accurate words quickly is a skill. It’s also a very powerful tool and potential weapon. When you know you express yourself exceedingly well, the question becomes ‘why not do that a lot and influence circumstances?’ Some people have this skill down pat.

#4 They may be insecure. Stillness, quiet, solitude, meditation, silence, arghhhh!! When you’re not talking or being exposed to stimulus, your thoughts and feelings quickly flood you. We often suppress negative feelings with food, entertainment, and other distractions.

Very talkative people tends to use talking as a way of pushing away their own thoughts and feelings. If the top issue for focus is always out there, then you don’t have to deal with the inside. [Read: How to stop being insecure: 15 steps to transform your life]

#5 They may have underdeveloped listening skills. A lot of people I’ve come across who talk overbearingly don’t like to listen. This isn’t to say that they aren’t astute observers of the world. They may just gain their information through gauging reactions and having verbal combat.

#6 They may be under stress. We live in an unprecedentedly busy world. There is so much noise and stimulus that we don’t always get time to even think and decompress our reality.

To top that, when you’re dealing with a lot of chaos and challenges, it can be a ton of mental data to break down and make sense of. And maybe your way of doing that is to talk it through.

#7 They may be nervous around you. Say you’ve got a crush on someone, admire them highly, or still developing your social skills. In these cases, you’re more likely to make social faux pas.

You feel a need to cover awkward silences with mindless chatter. In many ways, this is a sign of empathy. So, when somebody talks a lot when they you talk to you, take a step back and think about the effect you might have on them. [Read: How to tell if someone likes you – 15 weird and unlikely signs]

#8 They may be jealous of you. It’s like the envious father who bears down on the unusual child: ‘no, this is the way you’re supposed to look at things…’ That kind of assertion of the status quo can be an effort to minimize you as a threat or competition—to not change things. [Read: How to tell if someone is jealous of you]

#9 They may just not like you. Sometimes you just can’t bear to hear someone speak to you because you know you… won’t… like… what… they… say. One way of stopping this is to just speak first and forcefully, so the other person doesn’t get a chance to find their rhythm.

#10 They may want to hold power and control. When you speak, the most it gives you is more opportunity to influence a situation or person. This is especially true when people actively listen to you and respond affirmatively.

#11 They may have no respect for your opinions. If a person doesn’t respect you as a person they probably don’t care about what you’re up to or your personal development. You just become an object they talk at. Perhaps to satisfy their own ego. Or to use as a listening machine while they develop and sharpen their thoughts.

How to deal with people who talk too much

Now that we have why people who talk too much do, let’s look at different approaches to dealing with the overbearing chatterbox.

#1 Being disagreeable. Imagine a random talkative person engaging Obama without giving him the room to speak… If somebody values your thoughts, they want to hear your responses. When I’m repeatedly given no space to speak, I assume that person doesn’t value me enough for me to tolerate their company. Or that they dislike or feel threatened by me.

Depending on the context, I’m more likely to look away, show them I’ve lost interest, or just end the conversation abruptly. People encroach on your personal sense of boundaries bit by bit. It’s better to set boundaries early. [Read: How to say no – Stop pleasing people and feel awesome instead]

#2 Being distractingly non-serious. I don’t engage overbearing talkers in serious conversation. That only makes me invest more of my own energy into their frame. Example:

Them – ‘I wanted to talk to you about this thing.’ You – ‘Did you just call me a thing?’ Them – ‘No, what?’ You – ‘How dare you’ *leaves*?

Distraction technique complete.

#3 Assessing whether they talk a lot with everyone. This gives you an enormous amount of information. Usually they have a reputation for being a force of nature.

People often make jokes about them such as ‘oh wait, I have to prepare myself.’ Then you know it’s not you targeted specifically. Though you may still want to establish fine boundaries.

#4 Interrupting them. Even if someone has a reputation for being a talker, doesn’t mean the person isn’t aware that they’re overbearing. This is the old ‘give them an inch and they’ll take a mile’ principle. If you let them establish a relationship where they’re talking at you, it only grows into a habit. Don’t be afraid to interrupt. [Read: How to set boundaries – 10 crucial steps to feel more in control]

#5 Stopping them by paraphrasing. What happens is that they get into a stream of thought and the energy of what they’re saying makes them feel like they’re making all kinds of clever, rational, and important points.

But then they’re suddenly interrupted with a dissection of their last two sentences and errors reveal themselves… Paraphrasing or interpreting frequently makes the conversation clearer and more involving. [Read: 15 calm and firm ways to be the real alpha]

#6 Frequently asking what the focal point is. If there’s no problem or aim, then they just talk for talking’s sake. Remind them of this by bringing the convo back to a focal point. Then hone in on it ruthlessly, cutting off tangents. You’re not a wall. They need to learn respect for your time.

But on the flipside…

#7 Gaining info. Entrepreneur Gary Vaynerchuk noted how convos between him and Facebook founder Mark Zuckenberg are mostly himself talking and ‘Zuks’ listening.

Gary mused that this could be why Mark’s made so much more money. Listening’s an overrated skill. It teaches you what makes people tick and how to read what people want/will do in the future.

#8 Deciding if you’re compatible. Do you feel better or worse after interacting with this person? If it’s a constant negative, then perhaps find ways to distance yourself from them. There are cooler people to be around. [Read: Stop the craziness in life: How to deal with rude people]

#9 Showing empathy. Sometimes we just want to be understood. Most people don’t spill their life history to anyone who listens. They tend to choose people they like and trust. One of the five ‘love languages’ is ‘words of affirmation.’ If this is that person’s primary love language, then they may be just looking for some empathy. This can be particularly important after a traumatic or stressful experience.

Well I beat this one to death with a barrage of words. Sort of like people who talk too much, just with digital ink…

[Read: 8 signs you’re coming on way too strong]

It can be tricky to work out why someone chats so damn much. But your time and emotional health are important. So seek to understand and establish boundaries with people who talk too much.

The post People Who Talk Too Much: Why They Do It and How to Handle Them is the original content of LovePanky - Your Guide to Better Love and Relationships.

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