#*cries in undergrad*

[jeffreyfrancoeur]

Never has Luke Newton been more relatable than the bit in Shape of Things when Adam and Evelyn are talking about Adam’s two jobs and his student loans and he says, “yeah, but I’m educated, so I comprehend that I’m fucked.”

#Luke Newton #the shape of things #I miss him so I’m rewatching his play #and I forgot about this very relatable line #cries in loans from undergrad and grad school and being a public librarian

[fapper]

Just got told by someone that ppl think im ashamed of my identity LOL

Uhh im at a dinner and i met this one mongolian grad student that i vaguely know but talk to sometimes and the first thing she says is “we’ve been just talking about you during a lunar new year event” and i was like uhhhh. What did yall talk abt? And she said “well the whole vibe of the conversation was that ur ashamed of being mongolian and never come to any of our events and never talk to any of us etc. which isnt far from the truth right *smiling* everyone was like “whose [MY FIRST NAME]???””

?

TLDR i just got told in my face that all the mongolians here think im a fake mongolian who isnt proud of their identity 💀

#i would kill them #i actually hate all of them now im never even gonna interact w yall ever again omg #IJBOL this is so funny considering the fact that i listen to mongolian music and literally cried on lunar new yr bc i missed home #ijbolllll these ppl are. braindead actually #well it doesnt matter bc im better than them 🤞🚶‍♂️ im the only mongolian undergrad here like lick my ass rn fuck yall

[theresa-of-liechtenstein]

i have never been more proud of a student in my whole entire life

#they’ve gone through so much #i actually cried seeing this in my inbox because they have fought so hard this quarter #they’ve gone through unimaginable loss and i will be forever grateful that i was able to help bear it in this way #it’s a privilege. it’s a privilege to have borne them witness #iskul bukol: undergrad edition

[protect-chopin-at-all-costs]

🔓Achievement unlocked!🔓

✔️First time crying in a piano lesson with new teacher

#and I’m sure it won’t be the last #had to specify that it’s my NEW teacher #bc I cried plenty of times in front of my undergrad teacher lol #piano #grad school #music school

[tchaikovskaya]

I could/should elaborate when I’m not falling asleep as I am rn but like. I feel like for the people who you “mourn” who have died young and/or suddenly who you knew only in passing, or only casually interacted with, or were once close to but in the years between then and their death you barely spoke, etc etc etc, you arent actually mourning them or their presence in ur life (and now palpable absence) (supposedly) but just what it means to be a human on earth who has to grapple with inevitable loss and the immense weight of what a Person is and their footprint on everyone they interact with that is fleeting even tho there are several billions of us on the floating rock but none of those billions of lifetimes are ever overlapping 100%…. sigh :/

#context a student who graduated last semester (undergrad) died in a car crash like 500 miles away #and one of my fellow grad students/TAs and a few of his former profs are so upset about it and like……… #u barely knew this kid I mean of course I feel terrible that someone with his life ahead of him was snuffed out in the blink of an eye #but like…….. if u had never found out about this. or if this hadn’t happened and he went on to live a boring long life #he would mean next to nothing to u !!! u would be none the wiser! u would probz not even recognize his name in 10 years! why are u crying!!! #idk I would be less ANNOYED and hashtag BOTHERED by it if the same people didnt say such nasty derogatory shit about their undergrads #like every other time I talk to u about mundane news ur complaining about how ur students are all lazy untalented idiots #but now THIS ONE who was never meaningful to u before THIS GUY is SPECIAL to u…? u mourn him? #2 weeks ago if I showed u his student ID photo u would struggle to remember his name but NOW HE MEANS SOMETHING #NOW THAT HES GONE AND IT DOESNT FUCKING MATTER ANYMORE NOW HE MEANS SOMETHING TO YOU #tldr if ur still reading lmao I feel like this stuff is always about yourself and almost never about the dead person #which is valid in its own way I mean I’ve literally cried after passing mangled cars and ambulances with people who defs aren’t gonna surviv #but it’s never been about their life’s overlap with mine and retconning some kind of memorable or emotional significance to it #idk why I’m so emotional about this in like 3 separate directions but it’s just so fucking frustrating !!!!!!! 🥲🤡

[mycenaae]

one of my friends from undergrad is teaching at our alma mater now and she's mc'ing this lecture right now and i'm sooooo so proud of and excited for her :') she loves classics and translation and homer and emily wilson so much!!!!!!

#nat.txt #it's the 10th lecture in the series that started when i was in undergrad as a memorial for a student that took his own life #and there hasn't been one i've seen yet where i haven't cried my eyes out at his dad's speech at the start of the lectures

[soldier-poet-king]

Anyway made soup. Finished that indulgent awful YA read. Slowly learning that I can write reviews of things that are critical and the world won't end and I'm not going to cause people to die or something unspeakably horrible to happen just because I was "mean". Etc etc etc

MAYBE it'll be ok

#franposting #anyway yeah my ocd has this connection #that says if im critical of something. not even mean. just critical #someone will die/theyll be an accident/etc etc etc #all this because my ocd got really bad when i wrote a supportive but critical review of a prof #on those anonymous end of term things #and then she DIED a year later of cancer #and i was convinced her cancer came back bc of me #I genuinely believed it for years. i cried. i missed so much class. i was responsible for this womans death #anyway that was eons ago. 2nd year undergrad. #but i lived with that guilt for ages #i had ocd before then. but never so obvious. never for such a ridiculous clearly untrue fact #and then it spiralled into my every action causing world disasters and deaths #so yknow. #yes i AM a little insane on my bad days #i mean in full seriousness. i believe im responsible for completely reprehensible things when in an ocd spiral #and i live in fear!!! #but maybe it is getting better. maybe kt is getting easier #i was able to say hey this book was poorly written and plotted but it was indulgent and fun while still being bad #i didn't say it was good i said i was entertained type scenario #to be clear. i can HAVE mean or critical opinions in my head. bad things only happen when i express them publicly

[polyfrogsadorer]

i’ve been a microsoft word enthusiast for years but now my laptop is broken and i have no access to my files so maybe google docs was onto something

#this is why songs kent parson cries to has not been updated #i wanna cry and scream #did u know that losing access to all ur files in ur last semester of undergrad is really rough

[complexedandfruity]

another day, another phone interview 🤪

#with the same company as my aforementioned dream job (that i did not get) but a different department #it’s in the controls world instead of the mechanical world so a skosh out of my comfort zone #(source: i studied mechanical engineering & regularly cried over homework during my circuits class in undergrad) #but it’s more hands-on work than desk work which i think is more where i want to be work-wise rn #i would like one (1) job pls

[thedragonagelesbian]

dont think about cyrus going back to camp after the final battle and finding clive sitting on his pack with a love note in his paws and cyrus breaking down cradling this stuffed bear to his chest..................

#cyrus bg3 #cyrusXkarlach #ive almost cried like 5 different times today #only the potential embarrassment of crying in front of a bunch of undergrads is keeping me going

[hairringtonsteve]

im to the point of the job hunt where I've realized I don't want a job, I want a wealthy man to just give me a lot of money and never speak to me

#it's cool #its fine #ive cried all afternoon after a job interview because i hate everything #and prioritized mental health over internships in undergrad #so you know at least im coping even though i apparently have zero relevant work experience #like ive done better goddamn journalism than some peofessional journos in my coty #but was it published? #nope so it doesnt count

[theresa-of-liechtenstein]

i showed the professor i work with what i was going to do for my review session (i made up a bunch of problems that practiced a variety of concepts and skills) and he said “oh this looks like something [late professor i worked with] would do”

#WHAT A TERM LADS #gonna try to work with this guy again before i graduate #NO I ALMOST CRIED RIGHT THEN AND THERE #BUDDY YOU CANT JUST SAY IT REMIND YOU OF HIM AND NOT EXPECT ME TO WEEP AND WAIL #iskul bukol: undergrad edition

[ephemeral-winter]

Gave my paper which seemed to go okay but I immediately had to disappear in order to have a mental breakdown is this normal

#kinda weird also to be crying in the same bathroom where I cried so much as an undergrad but that’s what I get for conferencing at redacted #rare pic of me in the wild

[doctorwhoisadhd]

whats up gamers im: getting genuinely emotional over a casual greeting from one of my professors

#CRIES. #sax prof greets us with ''hello my saxophone prodigies!'' and its like #bro.... bro i am Literally crying...... #he doesnt say it sarcastically or anything . nd theres 2 sax majors in the class but hes def talking to ALL of us #and like he was music ed in his undergrad i know exactly wtf hes doing . hes planting the idea in our heads #that we DO play the saxophone (as opposed to ''play'' the saxophone) and like. musician efficacy and shit #but just cause ik what hes DOING that doesnt mean it WORKS LESS #like bro.. bro u are making me want 2 grow &get better.. bro u are making me want 2 be an active participant in furthering my own abilities #(& also crying over this bc my flute prof (no music ed degree) would NEVER say that the non-flute majors in the class were flute players) #(and other such similar & exclusionary things that only serve to harm her studio & the musicians in it) #ari opinion hour

[theold-ultraviolence]

These days I've been thinking a lot about this friend I had in the 7th grade with whom I used to exchange cd's with. I'd always been into classic rock since the 4th grade or something, and back in my school liking that kind of music was more of a 'guy' thing to like (which is ridiculous) so those same guys never really believed me when I told them that I liked that kind of music. And then in the 7th grade there was this dude (who was actually a huuuuge Ozzy Osbourne fan and wrote a paper on him once for homework) who did believe me and we clicked through sharing music. I remember he had all of these deep cuts and rare albums and all of these super niche facts about the prouction and it was thanks to him that I really expanded my music library and got more into Van Halen and Black Sabbath. I never owned the same cd's that he did so when I passed down music to him I always fell short lol, but he was so open to sharing with me. On ocassion we'd get into arguments over more modern bands like Avenged Sevenfold because he was adamant about the fact that they sucked unlike the bands of the past lol. And idk I've just been thinking about him a lot these days, wondering whatever happened to him. I haven't talked to him or seen him around in social media since then. I think I bumped into him when I had my admission test for college but that was it. And jumping back into that library of music as inspiration for Eddie has brought me back a lot of memories from then. He probably doesn't know about the impact that he had in my life at that time and it's just bittersweet to think about.

#this turned into a big rambly post lol #I just had to dump that thought #before going to work #literally cried earlier because I didn't want to go to work lmao #I don't like this group they whine about everything #it's like shut up why are you whining about having to learn how to draw and you're STUDYING AN UNDERGRAD IN DESIGN

[poebrey]

this week at work has been so bad I’ve been wondering if it would be easier to just go back to school 🫥🫥🫥

#its Friday yay #got called into a meeting today that I was sure would be about my terrible performance this week #instead they want to give me additional training so I can do more things *cries* #one day I will con myself into #going back to college and getting that masters degree I’ve always wanted #or like unfucking up that undergrad