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renaerys · 3 years

Note

Okay I've got one: Prompt 15 with Reds. 🤣🤣🤣

15. “I can’t hear a word you’re saying, I just keep thinking about how good that mouth feels.”

Somehow they can make even breathing a competition.

Send me a prompt and some characters! Reminder that the challenge is to make everything SFW, so we're getting creative here.

List of prompts

xxx

“So, we’ve called the paramedics and they’re on their way, but until they arrive it’s up to us. Remember the acronym, kids: C-A-B. What’s the first thing you do?”

Aiyeesha Simpson, a gunner in the making destined for academic greatness and social ruin, raised her eager hand. “Find a flat surface to lay him down!”

“Correct.” Blossom took Brick by the shoulders and shoved him down to the floor. A gaggle of Girl Scouts gathered around him as he wheezed for air.

“Ow,” he said.

Blossom patted his chest. “Please choke more quietly.”

I will end you, he thought so loudly he hoped she could hear him through the murder in his eyes. There was community service, and then there was cruel and unusual punishment. When his required hours were up and his record expunged, he was going to write a very negative Yelp review of the local Townsville Girls Scouts of America chapter and tank this year’s cookie sales. Supremely annoying, outrageously petty, and totally legal. That would teach Blossom for sure.

“Place your hands here between the nipples.”

Some of the Cadette Girl Scouts giggled. To be fair, Blossom of all people saying the word nipples in reference to her former mortal enemy as she trained a room full of twelve-year-old girls in CPR using him as the dummy was a perfect storm of absurd and kinky that he did not see coming. And now he was giggling himself, because he was a teenaged boy who thought the word nipples was funny regardless of the very clear contextual cues, and that pubescent shame was on him, one hundred percent.

Blossom, an ancient and inconveniently attractive evil resurrected in a lab for the sole purpose of making his life miserable, did not appreciate his amusement. “Push hard at a rate of 100 to 120 compressions per minute. Remember to put your bodyweight behind it, like this.”

Brick flexed, and Blossom pushed against his heart like she was trying to crush it in her hands. Once, twice, three times she administered compressions, and Brick’s eyes glowed red with impotent rage.

“Assist Blossom with her CPR lessons to her satisfaction, and we can forget this ever happened,” Mayor Bellum had promised Brick when he lost his temper and blew up an (empty) ambulance. Butch didn’t need his Super stomach pumped no matter how much he drank, so the ambulance and the four-figure bill that came with it were completely unnecessary. This defense did not convince the mayor, however.

The promise of the bill forgiven and his record cleared—and the deterrence of Aiyeesha Simpson filming the whole thing to upload to YouTube later—gave Brick the strength not to eye beam Blossom in front of the children.

“Okay, who wants to try chest compressions on the dummy?” Blossom offered to the girls.

You evil bitch, thought the aforementioned dummy.

After the third little girl properly placed her sticky, little girl hands between his nipples, Brick had had enough. “Hey, I’m still dying over here. Can we move on already? Jesus Christ.”

“Of course.” Blossom smiled, and she had never looked more terrifying.

Brick hoped Butch was suffering. He hoped he was hung over so bad he couldn’t piss standing up. He hoped Butch tried going online only to find that Brick had disconnected the Internet and cut him off from all his online games and porn because fuck Butch and his weak-ass stomach.

“Who knows what the next step is? Maybe someone other than Aiyeesha this time?”

None of the other girls seemed willing to stick their hands up. The carpet under Brick had scorched where his power leaked out in his building resentment for this entire situation. The smell of burned polyester just made him feel even more powerless to stop this.

“No? Okay, well, remember the acronym. A is for airway. You want to be careful about a possible neck injury, so gently lift the chin…”

Blossom’s hands were not sticky like the Girl Scouts’ hands, but they were cold where they touched his skin and forced his head back.

“Are the paramedics here yet?”

Brick got a tight fist in his short hair for that one, and he considered it a small victory. “No. Something about a shortage of ambulances, apparently.”

Biiiiiiiitch.

God, he was going to destroy her so bad.

“Once you’ve cleared the airway and confirmed there are no obstructions—”

“Then you kiss!”

Some girls picked up the giggling again. Blossom, ever the professional, cleared her throat. “Mouth to mouth is a life-saving procedure and not something I’d recommend doing to someone you plan to kiss.”

Wow, great advice.

Some girls still giggled and whispered to each other. Brick had a sinking feeling that this was only going to end with his embarrassment: everyone knew that the cold judgment of pre-pubescent girls was the absolute worst type of judgment a person could suffer.

“Are you gonna show us?”

“Well, I don’t think I need to show you all how to breathe—”

“It’s in the manual! You have to demonstrate every step.” Aiyeesha waved the CPR manual, and Brick realized his misjudgment. She was no vapid goody two-shoes in the making, but a future Honors Student with a secret, a Work Hard Party Harder, an Ivy League Early Decision candidate with all of senior spring semester to slack off because no one was ever going to touch her 4.3 GPA.

Aiyeesha beamed a winning smile at Brick, and it was as chilling as Blossom’s.

Jesus Christ, there are two of them.

True to form, Blossom had never been able to defy a good instructions manual. “I suppose if it says so in the manual…”

Locking lips with Blossom was not a big deal. He’d done it before when they were kids, and he could appreciate the irony of a gesture meant to save his life this time rather than end it. She didn’t even try to mess with him by using her ice breath, just went through the motions as described in the instructions. The girls were disappointed with the lack of hormonal fanfare of it all, which was probably for the best. Leave it to Blossom to make mouth to mouth the sexless, medical act it was literally intended to be. He was almost upset, because it felt like she’d won something here, which could only mean he’d lost.

Disappointed but more educated than they’d been when they’d arrived two hours ago, the Girl Scouts dispersed after the lesson, leaving Blossom and Brick to put away the equipment they’d used.

She held a dummy torso, and she was looking at him with that pinched, constipated look she got when she was about to say something especially snobby. Instead, she surprised him. “Brick, thanks for being mature about it. I can honestly say you surprised me.”

He stared at her.

“I’ll talk to Mayor Bellum. I’m sure you’ve done enough to meet your hours quota.”

He had not fulfilled even half of his required community service hours and they both knew it.

“So yeah, thanks. I can finish up here if you want to leave.”

Was she trying to get rid of him? Why?

“Brick? Why are you looking at me like that?”

When Blossom was winning, he was losing. That was simply the way of the world. So, if she was losing, it could only mean he was winning.

“Are you listening to me?”

Brick smiled in what he hoped was a cool, sexy way if he imagined looking at anyone but Blossom. “I can’t hear a word you’re saying. I just keep thinking about how good that mouth feels.”

Blossom stared. “I’m sorry?”

He would make her sorry.

“Yeah, you’re a great teacher. I could really feel your passion for demonstrating the lesson correctly. With your mouth.”

Her staring intensified. “Did you.”

“Oh, yeah.” He leaned his hip against the table like he’d seen in the movies. It worked for Daniel Craig in Casino Royale, and that guy had convinced Eva Green. Iconic. “I could really feel you trying to save me.”

Where was Aiyeesha with her phone to film this? There was so little he could do to rattle Blossom as they got older, and while the challenge delighted him, it was also exhausting being constantly a step behind her. Was this truly her demise? Had he won the Teenage Experience? Was this poetic justice for how she’d once killed him with a mere kiss, only to suffer the same fate in turn? He could have cackled. This was better than trolling the Girl Scouts of America reviews, although he might still do that because it was a genius idea and he had always indulged his own genius ideas when they came to him.

So infatuated was he with his own self-fellating digression that he was slow to react to Blossom sidling up to him. Her hand was still cold on his chin, and it sent a shiver down his spine. “Shall I save you again?”

Brick’s dignity drained with his blood, which was an unfortunate side-effect of being a teenaged boy that he would just have to suffer. But winning was about recognizing one’s weaknesses and working around them. He leaned into her personal space. “Please.”

He wasn’t sure who kissed who first, but it was happening and all he could think was I am better at this than you and I hate you and also Do that again. He tried holding her waist, and she fought back with her fingers in his hair. Not one to be deterred, Brick tried some tongue but pulled back when he tasted thirty degrees below zero. He immediately went back in because he could feel her superiority, her Got you, you horny idiot, but the joke was on her because he liked her cold, always had when it was hot as balls out and he’d make up any excuse to pick a fight with her just for the chance to cool off.

The Girl Scout troop leader walked in on them competitively making out in the classroom like it was an Olympic sport and put an end to things, leaving them at a frustrating draw for now. They said barely a word to each other when Brick glared at the troop leader so bad she flustered and didn’t even question them before running out of there with some excuse about getting the wrong room.

Later that evening, Brick caved and changed the Internet password back just so Butch would quit whining at him. He Googled kissing techniques and spent the next hour and a half watching YouTube videos and reading GQ articles about How to Please Her Like a Champion, because he was a champion and a winner and he was not going to lose to Blossom in this. Not a chance.

This had to be what they meant when they said kill with kindness.

“I’m going to end you,” he muttered to himself as he read about the top ten highest voted movie kissing scenes, which he would then stream and commit to memory in order to be fully armed and armored for the next time he encountered Blossom alone in a classroom. Maybe tomorrow. Maybe during their shared free period.

Truly, he had the most genius ideas.

xxx

If you enjoy my writing, check out more of my fics on AO3, link in my profile. I’m currently updating Trinity House and The Alchemy of Us. Thanks for reading!

#powerpuff girls #blossick #ppg reds #ppg brick #ppg blossom #powerpuff girls fanfic #september fic prompts #great pick Carrie!#this one was fun

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sarahwyland · 3 years

Note

hey! this isn't a specific prompt per se, but i was wondering if you could write something based on Nick attending Baxter High. Like something post part4 with a completely different outcome (ofc). I just really like the idea of the new transfer kid being Sabrina's boyfriend. Thanks!! ❤️

I 100% need to be writing “a story in 140 characters that you can shoot and produce in pandemic times” for grad school, but I had this idea while I was cleaning my kitchen and here we are. <3

“I’m drawing Roz a comic,” Harvey said. “The last scene will be me asking her.”

“That’s brilliant,” Theo approved. “I’m trying to write Robin a song. Cheesy, but he’ll love it.”

“What about you, Scratch?”

Nick looked up from the book he was reading. Both Harvey and Theo were looking at him expectantly.

“What about me?” he questioned.

“You got sucked into a book again, didn’t you?” Theo stated. “This is lunch, Scratch. It’s your chance to escape from classes and schoolwork, not pick up a book for fun.”

“That looks more like a brick than a book,” Harvey added.

“It’s War and Peace,” Nick said. He wasn’t a big fan of lunch periods. Sabrina had a different lunch and he found the whole thing rather obnoxious. Lunches at school were their thing. Instead, he got to sit with Harvey, who actually wasn’t all that terrible, and Theo, who was pretty damned cool. “It’s pretty good.”

“Captain of the wrestling team and he’s reading War and Peace during lunch,” Theo said to Harvey. “For fun.”

“We’re talking about prom,” Harvey said. “How are you asking Sabrina?”

“I have to ask her?” Nick questioned. “She’s my girlfriend. Doesn’t that make her my built-in date?”

“She’ll be expecting a promposal,” Theo told him. “All the others will be getting them and she’ll want one, too.”

“I’m sorry, a promposal?” Nick repeated. “What in the Heaven is that?”

“It’s what it sounds like,” Harvey answered. “A proposal to go to prom.”

“That’s stupid,” Nick stated.

“It is,” Harvey agreed. “And Sabrina will expect one. Roz, too.”

“I’m doing one for Robin too,” Theo added.

“And what do people do for these promposals?” Nick asked. “Pass a note in class and say ‘check yes or no?’” He would just send her a note on her hand if that was the case. They tried to refrain from using magic during Baxter High hours, but magic markers were easy to hide.

“Cheesy stuff,” Theo explained. “Last year, this girl’s boyfriend put those chocolate kisses all around her locker and left her a note that said ‘now that I’ve kissed the ground you walk on, will you go to prom with me?’”

“I’m not doing that,” Nick stated.

“We wouldn’t let you,” Harvey assured him.

“You could send her a cheese pizza, have them write, ‘I know this is cheesy, but will you go to prom with me?’ on the inside of the box...”

“Theo?” Harvey said. “Stop talking.” Theo shrugged good-naturedly. Harvey gave his attention to Nick. “People do things like stand outside of windows with signs or decorate their date’s car. I’m making a comic book for Roz, Theo is writing Robin a song. Just come up with something that’s uniquely you and Sabrina.”

The bell rang to indicate the end of lunch. Nick stood like the rest of his classmates, but his mind was on this whole concept of a ‘promposal.’ He thought it was utterly stupid. Sabrina was his girlfriend. They had literally been to both Heaven and Hell together. Did he really have to do something as ridiculous as putting candy around her locker and coming up with a terrible pun to ask her to go to prom with him?

He met Sabrina at her locker.

“Hey you,” she greeted as she swapped out her books for her next class. Nick leaned against the locker next to hers.

“Mortals are stupid,” he declared. She raised an eyebrow.

“What have the mortals done now?” she asked. It was a great source of amusement to her, watching Nick attempt to navigate the mortal world as a normal teenager. She knew there were some days when it was a sheer miracle he hadn’t cursed all of Baxter High - minus her - by day’s end.

“They use so many puns,” Nick stated. “So many terrible, unnecessary puns.”

“And where did this come from?” she asked. She closed the locker and allowed Nick to take her hand. This was their routine. They met at one of their lockers between classes, walked to class if they had it together, to an appropriate parting place if they didn’t. It was one of Sabrina’s favorite things about having Nick at Baxter High.

“Just something Harvey and Theo said at lunch,” he shook his head. A flyer for prom caught his eye. “We going to that?” he asked, nodding at it as they passed.

“I’d like to,” Sabrina hinted. “If someone asks me...”

Nick huffed to himself. He was going to have to come up with one of these dumb promposals.

“Someone will ask you,” he assured her. He lifted her hand to his lips outside of their classroom. “Time to pretend the mortals have history right.”

Sabrina laughed and followed Nick into the classroom. She enjoyed learning both the mortal and magical versions of history. Nick had a hard time not correcting the teacher.

Nick barely listened that day, however. He tried and failed to come up with a way to ask Sabrina to prom. If Harvey was creating a comic and Theo writing a song, he had to do something equally as big, something that Sabrina would love. She deserved that from him, after everything they had been through.

Except, several days later, he had nothing and the promposals had started at school with poorly made signs and ever worsening puns. In a moment of desperation, he found himself in the Spellman kitchen.

“Hi love,” Hilda greeted. “Sabrina’s out with Roz, but she should be home soon...”

“I actually stopped by because Sabrina isn’t here,” he admitted. “I need some help...”

“What can I do for you?” Hilda asked as she worked on that evening’s dinner. She and Cee had moved back in during those few days in which they thought Sabrina was gone from this world and never left after she returned to their plane. “I’m making that chicken casserole you like, by the way.”

“Excellent,” Nick smiled. He himself had all but moved in. “Do you know anything about these ‘promposals’ mortals do?”

“Isn’t that what they call asking another to prom?” Hilda asked.

“Yes, and I need to come up with a way to ask Sabrina.”

A howl of laughter sounded from behind him.

“Dammit,” he cursed. He turned to face Ambrose who was beaming from the doorway. “Of course you showed up right now.”

“I do love watching you play mortal, Scratch,” Ambrose said with barely contained glee. “Tell us more about your dilemma.”

“You know what? Never mind. I’ll figure it out...”

He tried to leave, but Hilda clucked her tongue to stop him.

“Ambrose, leave the boy alone,” Hilda said. “How can we help you, Nicholas?”

“I need an idea,” Nick said. “Literally any idea...”

“Have a seat,” Hilda waved at the kitchen table. “We’ll see what we can come up with.”

“Yes, Nicholas, let us help...” Ambrose made to sit down.

“Out,” Hilda directed him. “You won’t be helpful.”

“And miss Nicholas wrestle with a stupid mortal tradition? Absolutely not.” He took a seat and folded his hands. “Now, Nicholas, here’s what you do. She loves blueberry pancakes, no?”

“They’re her favorite,” Nick nodded.

“Have Hilda make up a batch,” he continued.

“I could do that,” Hilda nodded her agreement.

“Just make sure you make enough for the rest of us,” Ambrose advised her. “Anyway, present her with the pancakes and a note that says ‘I love you berry much. Go to prom with me?’ She’ll love it!”

“Ambrose!” Hilda chided. “That’s a terrible idea!”

Nick dropped his head to his hands.

***

In the end, Nick came up with the idea all on his own, despite Hilda’s best efforts and Ambrose’s merciless teasing.

“Come on, Scratch,” Sabrina tugged at his hand. “I want popcorn and candy before the previews.”

“I’ll never understand your love of previews,” he commented. “But before you blow inside in all your glory, perhaps you may want to pause here on the sidewalk and read the marquee?”

Sabrina gave the Paramount’s marquee a precursory glance, expecting to see a listing of the night’s movies.

Except...

It said something else.

She stopped in her tracks and read it again.

Go to prom with me, Spellman?

She turned to Nick.

“Well?” he asked.

She was glowing.

“Nick...” She threw her arms around and kissed him soundly. “Of course!”

He chuckled against her lips and kissed her again.

“So I did it right?” he asked. “This whole promposal thing?”

“You did it perfect,” she assured him, arms still looped around his neck. A thought occurred to her. “Is this why you called mortals stupid last week?”

“It’s also why I’ve been a little distracted lately,” he admitted. “I thought the fact that you’re my girlfriend meant I had a built in prom date, then Kinkle and Theo started talking...”

“Technically, you do,” she told him. She pecked his lips. “Thank you for going along with this whole mortal promposal thing anyway though.”

“Anything for you,” he said. “I love you, Spellman.”

“I love you, Scratch.” She pecked his lips one more time. “Now let’s go get some candy.”

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ninesoftkids · 6 years

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ship ur mutuals with skidz! bringing this ask meme back cause y not! friendship! woo! 💓❤️💓💖💗💕💞❣️💗❤️💞❣️

Aayyy, I love these asks! Unfortunately, Stray Kids only has nine members :( so I’ve finished the rest of my mutuals with other idols I think fit! I hope that’s ok lmao. Right. (It’s gonna be quite long so i’m going to insert the line thingy) Here we gooooo :D

· Woojin – Andy. Thefirst person to fight your corner, but sometimes they lack belief inthemselves. An essential part of our family, just like Woojin. One of the mostcaring people I’ve met, but also definitely one of the most chaoticallyencouraging people ever. Don’t let them eat the trees. @haknveons

· Minho – Roxi. Two bubblypeople with serious visuals! But don’t let their cuteness fool you – there’sdemons hidden beneath the angel exteriors. Just as Roxi loves to both hurt andheal us with gorgeous pictures of our faves, Minho loves to tease. The push-and-pullrelationship. Roxi the Angel, and Minho the Devil. But he cares deeply, andwould always listen to whatever worries you had. You can expect cute good nightmessages and missed Skype calls that are made up with a thousand nose kisseswhen you finally see each other. The Opposites Attract Couple @lxx-fxlix

· Chan – Syd. Bluntand honest, forthright with their beliefs, I think Chan and her would have amazingphilosophical arguments that would end in cuddles and Disney on the sofa whilethey throw popcorn at each other. Chan could teach you Korean, and you canteach him your slang :D Also that height difference would be cute af. @hwarang-my-loves

· Hyunjin – Mer. Twoanimal lovers with visuals to merder. 😉 You share the cutestgiggles and are always down for pillow forts and cuddle piles. Fancy dinnerwho? Give you two pizza and some fluffy dogs and you’re good to go. You’d takethe best pictures of each other and you’d be the Aesthetic Couple @softstan4softboys

· Changbin – Liz. Edgelord?Bitch, where? Like Changbin, your aesthetic is the opposite of your personality.You’re both whole dorks who love fiercely and are genuinely amazing people. Plus,I just really like imagining Changbin doing aegyo for the last Cadbury’schocolate or something and you judging him so hard, but doing the exact samething thirty seconds later. Softies. Both of you. The Tsundere Couple @darkaegyo

· Jisung – Hae. Two kidswith unbelievable and unending energy. Plus the visuals? God damn you’d look sogood together. Another Aesthetic Couple. Give the two of you energy drinks andyou’ll be bouncing off the walls. Expect midnight runs to your local supermarket,throwing grapes into each others mouths, cute holiday vlogs where Jisung triesto befriend a squirrel and you throw peanuts at him. @squirrelboiii

· Felix – Csen. He’dlove to watch you draw in the park while he kicks a ball around with the boysand pretend he’s not trying to figure out who you’re drawing – he hopes that it’shim. Teaching each other to cuss in other languages. He’d roll his eyeswhenever you scream over Namjoon or a Stray Kids Comeback but secretly love howexcited you get about things you love. The sarcasm also runs strong in thisship. Cute selfies returned with a ‘I did it better’. 100% down to prank eachother. The Friends to Lovers Trope we all adore. @lee-minho

· Seungmin – Esther.People can’t decide if you’re the most savage or the most soft couple to exist.You both put so much thought into what you do for others and you’re so treasuredby everyone who gets to call you a friend. Birthdays are always anticipatedbecause you try to outdo each other in what presents you get each other. You metat a theme park, both the odd person in a group and having to sit next to eachother on a ride. When the ride ends you leave the others to find some ice creamand drinks – and it isn’t your fault that you forgot you arrived with otherpeople. The Meet-Cute we all deserve. @goddamngyu

· Jeongin – Charz. Thelittle sister we all wish we had. You and Jeongin would be the cutest ok. You’dcompete at baking and force the boys to choose which is better without themknowing whose is whose (you’d both try to bribe the boys beforehand) You’ddance long into the night, not watching the time and just laughing at eachother’s attempts at popular dances. You were probably introduced through mutualfriends at a bonfire, and spent the night arguing over who had the best randomfacts. The Must Protect Couple @strayedtoofar

And now my other mutuals! :D

· Tayla – KimSeokjin, BTS. Both visuals and Jin would help raise your self-confidence levels byalways taking pictures of you looking cute and bragging to the boys about you. Absolutedorks, with ridiculous nicknames to match. You steal his shirts and he pretendsnot to notice because his jumpers give you sweater paws and it’s adorable. But thosesweater paws come in handy when he tells a particularly bad pun and one lookfrom Yoongi has you whapping one sleeve across his arm, despite laughing atleast as hard as Jimin. Couple Goals. @mindieu

· Ash – Lee Jihoon, SVT. You’re another Opposites Attract Couple, but both of you makeme want to cuddle the shit out of you. Both completely adorable, you probablymet like one of your AU’s :p A penpal thing that your friends mischievouslysigned you up for and it grew from there. You’ll send him Kpop memes and thoughhe won’t understand many of them, the second he sees his face he’ll be like ‘hey!It’s me!’ He hates aegyo but he’ll do it to make you smile, even at the expenseof his dignity in front of the other members. The Pen Pal trope that I am anabsolute sucker for. @lovelyhoonie

· Stacia – KimTaehyung, BTS. Infectious laughter would follow you everywhere you went, and you’dalways be touching each other in some way – holding hands, an arm wrappedaround your waist, you name it. Also secretly evil – together with Jungkook,you prank the shit out of the other members and no one ever links it back toyou. And why would they? Both of you have Angel faces. The Trouble Maker Couple @softtrasshh

· Jazz – Taeyong, NCT. Istill don’t know a lot about NCT, but I think your personalities would match sowell! Both fun loving and so caring and ready to give advice if people need it.You’d bond over your protective instincts and probably spend lots of time atsmall parties with close friends, laughing over good memories. @always-a-winwin

· Ty – Jeongyeon,Twice. Neither of you could look like a mess if you tried. Goddess-tiervisuals, I swear. I also like to think that Jeongyeon sends really cutemessages to her members and always tries her best to make everyone feel better.And you’re literally the same, in that respect. You love angst so much, and youdon’t need a happy ending, so when she finishes a sad movie or novel, you’rethere to tease her back into laughter again. Neither of you are good for myheart and you fucking know it, you demons. Pet names between you range from ‘babygirl’ and ‘sweetheart’ to ‘nerd’ and ‘oi, you’. The Playful Relationship. @softspearb

· Bri – Kihyun, Monsta X. Outspoken about what youthink is right and wrong. Incredibly loyal and fun-loving. Always up for anadventure, and weekends will find you two trying to get lost in the city purelyfor the fun of it! The Adventurous Couple with so many stories to tell! @b-interest

· K – Jennie, BlackPink.You seem kinda intimidating but you’re actual fluffballs. Always have eachothers backs, and spend your weekends at the park trying to get pictures of thecutest dog – loser has to buy ice cream. The Cute Couple @straychijeu

· Roo – Jung Hoseok, BTS.You always try to see the best in people and in every situation. You’ve beenthrough difficult situations, but you smile your way through it with your headheld high and you always show concern for everyone else, sometimes forgettingthat you deserve to be cared for too!!!! @chanscurls

· Tia – Jin Jin,Astro. Visuals for days and with smiles that make the sun jealous! I thinktogether you’d be the couple that always out and doing something. Trying a newrestaurant, racing each other down streets, going to karaoke rooms. Your IG isfull of, not necessarily aesthetic photos, but definitely short videos of JinJin doing something amusing and you laughing in the background, or you leaningon a fence pointing at ‘the view’ with a comment from him ‘you are the view’. TheCheesy Couple! @ ????

· Flora – Youngjae,GOT7. Very affectionate and take the cutest selfies! If someone can’t find eitherof you, it’s because you’re hiding somewhere with ice cream and a movie. You loveteaching each other your own languages and laugh together over both yourattempts at the correct accents and pronunciation! @ ???

I cannot remember some of your URL’s so like…. can the rest of y’all link this to them bc i’m an awful human being lmao

#i love my mutuals with all my heart

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jess-oh · 5 years

Text

Reflection

Hey journal!

Wow, it’s been a while since I actually typed here. And even longer since I wrote “Reflection” with a capital “R”! Weird.

Anyway, I am currently sitting in a Starbucks in Evanston and I am being so much more productive out here than I ever was back in my apartment. It’s just way too hot to do anything! I’m so stressed over my ever increasing electricity bill the longer I keep the AC on and because it’s so hot, I’m too cranky and lazy to actually do anything! I think I’m going to start going out to local coffee shops more often so I can actually get work done and be productive! I don’t usually enjoy staying at school until too late just because it’s such a long way home but I do think getting out of the apartment would be good for me. It’d motivate me to actually do things and because I haven’t been home all day, I’ll also be that much more motivated to actually clean up around the apartment and do things! I’m not used to being home all the time and I just end up feeling unproductive and lazy and restless. I’m going to start getting out more so I can actually do more and be more productive! Maybe I’ll message the Movement summer chat letting them know that I’ll be studying in public throughout the week and that they’re always free to join me! ^_^

I also realized that my meetings with P. Josh and Amanda throughout the week as well as our MAST meeting every other Saturday served as the perfect opportunity for me to be very honest and intentional and vulnerable and rely on them for help and advice or to just vent. Without those sessions, it’s harder to just approach P. Josh for help casually. Unless it’s just us two in a car together or something which hasn’t been happening that often anymore. Especially since I live so much closer to Evanston now. There’s no huge reason for me get a ride anymore because I’m not even on the train for that long anymore. It makes me a little sad and has made me realize that I’m actually not as close to P. Josh as I originally thought. It’s definitely a lot easier for me to suddenly hit up Amanda or meet up with her throughout the week. Suddenly hitting up P. Josh... a part of me always feels bad. He’s already got a lot on his own plate and in having to take care of so many people on MAST now as well as understanding his own currently struggles and battles, I feel bad reaching out to him and just adding more onto his plate. I don’t want him to just respond to me out of obligation and I’m afraid that he would. And plus, I feel like I’ve already bothered him enough recently. Right now, there’s isn’t anything overarching on my heart that I need to bring up to him. Besides, yknow, maybe moving to NorCal in the future. But I also know he wants me to stay in Chicago at Lakeview and grow with the ministry and invest and change the culture. Which, I do honestly want to do now and am hopeful about. I have hope that more people from Movement will start going into Catalyst instead of leaving instead. I do. I do have hope for the future and if I leave Lakeview, it’ll be because I’m leaving Chicago. Not because I just want a different church. I know that Movement will be hard this coming year but am genuinely happy and know that I am well cared for by many adults and other people. I do feel a community at Lakeview. I might not always feel it in Movement, but I do feel it in Lakeview.

And I also don’t want him to freak out or be sad/discouraged when I tell him I’m going to move away.

I also want to bring up what I realized with Amanda to him. When he disagreed with me about what the author was saying, I felt really defensive and offended. And looking back, I was definitely in the wrong and I was just in a bad mood that day anyway. But it is true that I wasn’t upset bc of the actual content or what the author said. I was upset because I wanted P. Josh to support me and tell me that I was right and that the author didn’t understand my personal struggle or how much I had tried. I wanted him to validate my feelings. But I know that if he had told me those things, it wouldn’t have been actually factually correct and his answer was totally justified. But yeah, I just wanted to be validated by him. But because I understand the 100% justifiable and valid reasoning behind the answer he did give me, I don’t feel like there’s any use in bringing it up to him.

Also, when Grace An mentioned that P. Josh and I co-dependent with each other... it really stuck with me because I never thought of it like that before. But I guess we are. And honestly, I know he’s only human and only four years older than me so he’s still learning a lot and not yet totally mature or developed. But it is kind of a burden for me to be with him sometimes. Because I try to take care of him too. In not telling him certain things so as to not stress him out. Or trying to just be there for him through church events or activities. It really breaks my heart to always see him get so discouraged and I want to do my best to make sure he doesn’t feel that way. Whether that’s by offering a different perspective or giving words of encouragement/affirmation or just by showing up physically in person so he knows it isn’t for nothing. And it is kind of burdensome trying to be a good friend to him and doing all these things for him too. Because a part of me just wants to be selfish and rely on him always and look up to him for guidance and to be a constant strong figure in my life that I can always look up to. But he isn’t. Instead, he’s more like a friend. I also noticed that I always call him P. Josh to others but say, “Joshwa” to his face. Because I see him as a friend and an equal when I see him in person. But a part of me also has a lot of respect for him and will always acknowledge his status as pastor. Especially because I see how much work he puts into the ministry.

I really shouldn’t be spending so much money and going to coffee shops so often because my mom gave me $200 to spend for shopping(I ended up only need $2 tho lol). Only $50 of the money I’ve been spending is actually mine! I don’t want to have to owe her so much money once I get paid again T 0 T I’ll just be perpetually broke!

Sidenote: I really hope I can pay off my credit card debt soon T____T

Please pay me back Chalana. Please. I want to have trust and faith in you. Please show me that I was wrong and that you were genuinely just trying to do your best in getting by. That you didn’t just betray me. That it wasn’t all just a lie.

I also feel like I disappointed Jenny in not being able to deliver on the 3k/5k poster. Especially since she already overhyped me to everyone at the VBS dinner, I feel bad not being able to do my part. But I am hoping that I can sometime during this week. I just want to be able to say no when I don’t have time or can’t come up with anything creative. I thought this was in our original agreement. That gives me the freedom to do things as much as I can and help as I please. And she still has the security of getting her projects done by someone even if it isn’t me! But if I always have to do all her projects even when I can’t, it’s more burdensome and draining than anything and I’m just left feeling bad and like a failure and awful that I disappointed her. I don’t want that. I do really value our relationship together and although I am starting to see her more as a human instead of as a mother, I do still perceive her a strong maternal figure in my life. And I don’t want to let her down.

Sigh.

Too late to stop by the Apple store and I’m not really in the mood to stop by Target anymore. I’ll just go tomorrow.

I do, absolutely, need to prepare my curriculum and class for Sunday though!!! D:< We actually had a fun time in class last Sunday. I want to do that again this week. I just need to dedicate the necessary time and energy to the activity and plan out the class well! And also get better at names! = A =

And, I still need to draw my new weeks in my bullet journal! Hopefully I can find the motivation and energy to actually do that when I get home today. Just get it done, Jessica! Don’t procrastinate! You know you’ll regret it later! Just get it done today and now so you don’t have to worry about it later!!!

Anyway, Thank you for listening to my rant journal! I think it was much needed to just get all these thoughts out of my head and onto paper.

Last thing: I can’t tell if I’m annoying Amanda or if she genuinely doesn’t mind my constant texting and she just isn’t gr8 at replying quickly. I’ll try and clear that up with her soon though.

But yeah, thanks journal! Have a good rest of your day~ ^_^

#reflection

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