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#And that im a very uncomplicated person when it comes to some things. For example how i feel about other people
mrfoox · 1 year
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Uh.... Kinda brought up an topic which was tough but it was okay....?
#miranda talking shit#As usual i never said all i thought bc i always have so much on my mind#But ... Basically mentioned that people but is the recent case oliver can feel like hes too careful with me#So ofc he clarified that he doesnt and just generally liked to be nice and not rude and i buy that but kept on saying#That people in my past also have thought i am more fragile and maybe proper than i actually am#And that im a very uncomplicated person when it comes to some things. For example how i feel about other people#They can tell me and do anything and that wont make me suddenly dislike them or drop them. If i like a person already#... Theres a point where i do not care what else they have done or do? At least ive not encountered anything that have changed it for me#Ive never met someone who killed someone or something but... Who have opinions or have done things or do things which i dont care about#For example drugs. I havent tried anything and probably wont but i know multiple who have or are using and that doesnt make me... Think#Less of them? So. I explained that and said that he had never said something to me that has hurt me or something. Or then i brought up#The incident a few weeks ago and said that time i got hurt. But then i cried for an hour and realized he probably said what he said#Bc he was scared and worried. And it wasnt about me at all. So then i was just ... Fine. I wasnt planning to say anything about that even#But told him anyway. And then touched on the topic that i... Do things... Without thinking about it in the moment#And then realize afterwards its somewhat intentional? And its not something i like to say bc i feel like a bad person?#We didn't discuss that much bc he had to go so idk if ill even bring that up again unless the topic is close but yeah.#He said it was a good talk and i agree. Im always worried to share anything i think or how i work with people bc i fear they'll think im#Weird. But i did it and he seemed fine and i was stable enough. I think he wont care and thats what i like about him but also#I know bc we are so different... It's more likely we misunderstand each other. And honestly i cant shake the feeling i scare him a bit#Bc i feel so much and i want to talk about everything. Thats why i somewhat hesitate to say some things#He also said he have a history of. Dropping people or having his opinion of someone shift bc of something. Thus then it make sense#He got freaked out by me that time. Bc he thinks in his terms and for him others can be changed by small incidents so he thought i had#Changed mine. Thus the 'ive ruined it. I ruined our relationship and it was so good' It should scare me more that he said that his opinion#Of others can change so quickly and big. Bc... Im anxious but for some reason i.. Dont feel worried about that? Maybe bc i have always had#The mindset that people will leave me in the end no matter what and that i always care more about someone than they me. So i dont expect#Anything of anyone i like... But today was interesting talk tbh. I love discussing things with him. He's so different from me it's fresh#Possibly my autistic ass being hyperfocused on him and intrested bc of that. This is kinda how i was with Fabian at some point#He felt like an interesting individual bc he was so different from me so i was obsessed with talking with him about things#I enjoy it and i wont share how i think so i dont scare anyone so.... Should be okay
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some thoughts about 'kayfabe compliance'
i don't have 'moral issues' with RPF but i do engage with it on quite a different level to regular fanfiction (except john and paul they're a secret third thing to me but i digress). it's hard to fully put my finger on what's different about it, maybe there's a much stronger sense of thinking "this isn't real" the whole time because the disconnect between actual full people ive become parasocial with and the AO3 interface with fanfic tropes on it is much greater. anyway, it's a whole different mode of engagement is the point, so reading wrestling fic has a tendency to be a VERY whiplash inducing experience, due to how fast and loose one can play when it comes to what is the text we are writing fanfiction about here. cue a ramble
the basic divide is kayfabe vs shoot, where a fic is either about the fictional wrestling personas in their storyline, as if wrestling is just a very strangely set up long form soap opera (which it is), or it's RPF about the wrestlers themselves, and will reference their fictional personas as just that, fictional. both are fine and chill, i personally vastly prefer the former not just because it's less uncomfortable but also because, well, that's where all the conflict and angst is and I did sort of come here for that. but the existence of the second option is so interesting, because it's not actually a basic divide, it's a bizarre spectrum and nothing is certain. using sami and kevin as the illustrative example:
the very fact that throughout a 'shoot' fic, sami will still be called, well, sami. if he's called his real name you know you're in full speed ahead RPF mode, but using 'sami' places a layer of fictionality onto the whole thing, as if this is still a made up story about wrestling, it's just a story about wrestlers making up stories. i've never read any drag queen fanfic but i'd guess this is the same effect as using the drag names and writing about their reality TV personas which are varying degrees of authentic, but all basically created for audience entertainment, so is it even 'real people' fanfiction?
stories about el generico where el generico is sami in a mask, but wrestling is real. so he really loses/wins matches, he really gets betrayed and hurt by kevin, but the gimmick is kayfabe, meaning kayfabe also exists but then what is real and what's acting doe sit matter
this is a small thing but it speaks to the whole mindfuck, which is a fic in which kayfabe doesn't exist, everything wrestlers experience happened for real, but wrestling jargon keeps appearing like 'mark', 'bump' and most maddeningly of all 'jobber'! who's jobbing! they're just losing fights!
and then there's just the level at which the writer simply does not give a fuck about any supposed 'rules' and just picks and chooses what's kayfabed and what's not. case in point, a fic i read last night which started as a clear shoot/rpf fic - kevin and sami in the aftermath of Battleground, congratulating each other on putting on such a banger and chilling out in the locker room. only for the fic to reveal half way through that kevin's betrayal at r evolution was real he and sami just made up and i guess decided to keep the feud going for TV. sami went into his pre planned semi choreographed match with his best friend to conclude the story that began with said friend nearly breaking his back for real.
and all that is very cool, but the thing is it means such a different thing to me when i perceive something as entirely fictional vs actual feelings and events with the real person who made that fictional thing. i want the real person to be happy. i want an uncomplicated unmessy parasocial relationship there. i want the fictional character tormented in agony, and i usually specifically seek this out in fic. so when i enter a story, and it's not clear from the get go if im reading about fictional characters who caused each other terrible pain, fictionalised versions of real people who get along very well as far as we know and who are untouched by that pain, or some strange mixing and matching of the two, there's a real tension there as my brain tries to recalibrate what kind of narrative engagement is about to occur
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jamzandbamz · 2 years
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I was reading through your asks from the last week and someone mentioned something that I had thought about as well. There’s been a few times that Jeff has said “guys don’t take everything I say so seriously.” I think he said that in the gaming stream but an example of it would be in the IQ Test when he said he Sept with one of the Chain Smokers’ girlfriends. Someone asked him to tell that story and that’s when he said “I never did that, don’t take everything I say so seriously.”
So what I’m getting at is….I guess we won’t know until the George pod comes out (which was filmed two days after he talked about the new girl) how he is feeling about it. He definitely was way over the top with how he was talking about her. It was interesting when he was telling his mom they’re having a baby and will have a home birth (she’s holistic but it’s odd that they had that conversation after seeing each other only two weeks but anyway) then after saying he met a girl he says kind of in a deflated tone “nah I’m just joking but I did meet a girl.” The tone was completely opposite of the rest of the episode when she was mentioned. So was it an act? I’ve heard views are down is that why he’s acting like this?
The person that had the ask I’m referring to said this: “Honestly, part of me is starting to wonder if he’s sharing all of this for content and realistically, things aren’t quite how he’s making out with this girl? Wondering that because of it being complicated, how quick he was to say they arent bf/gf, his reaction when steven talked about being in love.” To say two weeks ago that it was so complicated you weren’t even in communication after Coachella and then one week ago “you can’t help when you meet the love of your life Steven”, “you never know when to expect it/I met a girl in the last few weeks that’s changed my life for the better.” What are your thoughts?
Sizeable post for you! (If you want it 🥺) I answered over 90 asks that night so some stuff is a bit buried now lol! My take is still that it's an over the top expression of very real feeling bc he's very happy, but that there's humor showing bc he's naturally comedically inclined 🤣
I dont think it's as sophisticated as a pre-meditated strategy to get views (just my opinion). He's the type to get *high* off of other's moods, music, vibes, etc. He's amenable to drugs, mild altering substances, probably hypnosis, etc.. That makes him *very* very susceptible to transforming into an energizer bunny when he's emotionally stimulated (good or bad) lol! Just my sense
When he said that to his mom, it came after saying "threw em (meds) in the trash," which he followed with "is this what spreading misinformation is? Im just kidding mom. I have met a girl, but im just goofin around" so you're right that he's not gullible, I think he wouldn't stop meds, or stop seeing doctors...I think it's more that he's high as a kite and saying whatever as a goofy guy lol. He's very likely to get sent a different way when he's into a girl, too, bc he's the type to please & mold himself to her. Also, emotions set in quick when you fall for someone. Even a few days, or a week! Something did uncomplicate itself, absolutely
I don't think he lies as much as others' might think, but there was a huuuge disagreement in Feb when we were chatting about it on here when I started taking asks. My takes are a lil different I guess. I think he can be very "laughing on the outside, crying in the inside." I was maybe one of just a few who believed he was unhappy/bothered by the failure of that potential relationship. ☁️ just my thoughts 💕
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kendrixtermina · 3 years
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Things I admire about other enneagram types (from a 5 perspective)
6: You have this switch you can throw where you can just act confident in dire situations. I know from what you tell me it feels awful on the inside but it’s still useful. I can’t do that unless I’m actually confident about something. Some of you also have excellent BS detectors & think of checking things that wouldn’t occur to me. ive learned so much from you guys im jully that your ideas are so much more practical on average
3: You somehow bring the joys of practical problem solving approach into the social/interpersonal realm & somehow solve things that I wouldn’t consider solveable. There’s something rly valuable to being ‘a positive realist’.
8: How are you so concise? You’re so good at saying things in a clear, impactful manner! (compared to us rambly head types at least)
It’s a somewhat rare type & I don’t know many people, so I don’t know anyone IRL in depht, but at least for the more self-aware examples, many that I’ve seen in internet videos etc. also strike me as pretty likeable, especially in that straightforwardness & the way they admit to their stuff and like... actually say things out loud that’s just instantly interesting. 
1: Some 1s are not chill, but the ones that are are very chill indeed. Very impressive. The cool & unique thing about your way of thinking is how you’re objective but positivistic (without an overly positive focus) - my way of thinking is more negativistic, I see holes, things that are not there etc. novel visions happen but it’s hard to synthethize them on purpose. You guys tho? You see what IS there & concrete visions for what can be done to fix stuff. 
Something that I find fascinating is how we’re both running optimization algorithms but yours is maximizing (looking for the most results for a fixed expense)  while mine is minimizing. (looking to get a fixed results with least uneccesary variables)
7: So many cool ideas! Actually way more competent & dilligent than ppl assume especially if older & wiser. Ppl underappreciate how much this is very much a mental type. Please, do keep talking interesting stuff to me im listening * big shiny owl eyes *
 Also have the advantage of usually having tons of other friends to have fun with when I don’t feel like extroverting right now so i dont feel so bad if i cant make it all the time. 
9: Maybe you think ppl don’t want to hear about your vast imagination but I for once think it’s super cool. No pressure to share though, not making a big deal about it just makes you mysterious. When you do tell me your thoughts, i can rest assured in the knowledge that im a special level 10 friend. ^-^
Also you can be so likeable & funny & ppl really listen to you? Like I’ve noticed myself that sometimes I’d be all angry & worked up into some complicated idea about why I’m right and the other person is terrible,  and then this 9 dude who’d just been listening on the sidelines so far would say something super disarming that just cut through all my BS rationalisations, and soon after there was just no more argument & I really changed my actions long-term??  
4: Ppl don’t sufficiently appreciate how badass you can be, esp when you know what you want
Over the years I had several 4 friends who were just, like, me but cooler, if I had the energy & comitment for this sort of consummate defiance against The Machine every day. One had picked up some old mannequins & made a decoration for her room out of it & that was such a power move? & she knew all these obscure art films... I wish I’d stayed in touch with them more.  
2: i would prolly write more here if i knew more 2s in-depht; Even so I must commend how you notice & remember so much stuff about ppl? 
For all that I think that conventions like social obligations gifts & holidays are often forced BS, I’m impressed with how much love you can put into that. It doesn’t feel like BS coming from you. 
5: Now I don’t know that many in-depht, but from my own, possibly biased PoV I’ve perceived the few other ones I’ve actually got to know as refreshingly uncomplicated & accepting (even if they seem picky at first), but also way more passionate than you’d think on first glance. You should see them in their element, if you have the opportunity. The sorts of ppl whose eyes sparkle for the beauty in forgotten places. 
IDK if others would also describe me this way as well. One does try. 
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elyvorg · 4 years
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hey! im a fan(? it feels a little weird saying that) of your blog and i just read your chapter 5 rewrite you just posted- and i think there’s another way to keep kaito alive. since monokuma has no right to execute someone (and ‘lost’ the trial), they might be able to argue that monokuma now owes them a life- more specifically, owes them nursing kaito back to health (or at least to a state where he doesn’t die in a day.) id love to hear your thoughts! (or you could let this sit in ur inbox, haha)
[chapter 5 AU post in question here]
Huh, interesting idea! Despite how much I love funneling every AU I can into a path where Kaito gets his illness treated and survives, I never actually thought of this possibility! I always just went with the simplest possible method of getting him to a normal hospital, perhaps because, when the meaningful end goal is just Kaito Survives Because I Want Him To, precisely how that's reached isn't really the part I'm interested in. So, on the one hand, this could be a slightly different way to achieve that, absolutely, and it wouldn't necessarily be that different if we decide that things go smoothly and Monokuma keeps his word.
But on the other hand, we could think of this scenario not as just a means to the end goal of Kaito surviving, but as a potential story in itself that may or may not actually turn out that way.
Because here's the thing: should they really trust Monokuma with Kaito's health?
Kaito would be nervous as hell entrusting his life to the AI who's been gleefully murdering and tormenting all of his friends. He'd be rendering himself completely helpless and vulnerable, knowing that Monokuma could really in theory do absolutely anything he wants to him without Kaito being able to escape or defend himself. Maki and Shuichi would share this nervousness, too; I can see Maki insisting on coming with Kaito to make sure Monokuma doesn't try anything funny (Shuichi'd want to go too, except they'd probably agree he should stay behind and focus on figuring stuff out). But even then, Monokuma might refuse to allow it and require that if he's going to heal Kaito, Kaito comes to him alone.
Would they trust that? Because I wouldn't trust that for a goddamn second. Even if they've made a demand based on having "won" the trial that Kaito should be allowed to live, it would be very within Monokuma's character to technically adhere to the letter of their demands while still finding some way to use this opportunity to make Kaito and his friends suffer for entertainment. Demanding someone be nursed back to health like this is a lot like something that happened a couple of times in DR2, and one of those times, the dying person in question ended up being turned into a robot. Given the situation, Monokuma definitely could have straight-up healed said person if he'd wanted to - so he very much just robotified him for the lulz. And, granted, Kaito would probably be pretty chill with being turned into a robot as an alternative to dying, especially since Keebo exists, but that's just an example. There are definitely even worse things than that Monokuma could do to him.
(While writing this post, I thought of a similar but much more horrible thing Monokuma could totally justify doing here if they made the mistake of trusting him with Kaito's life, and whoops, my thoughts on that idea Escalated to the point that it really kind of deserves an AU post all of its own. Maybe two, even. So watch this space for that soon!)
Ultimately this would boil down to how much they trust Monokuma to genuinely just help Kaito, versus how much they believe in Shuichi's ability to get them out of here and to a proper hospital ASAP combined with Kaito's ability to hold on and keep fighting his illness until then. Essentially, would Kaito rather entrust his life to Monokuma, or to Shuichi and his own strength? Looking at it that way, the correct choice to make here is rather obvious.
...Then there's also the fact that what Monokuma would do to Kaito in this situation has a lot to do with what the audience wants. The whole premise of why the students "winning" trial 5 means anything comes down to the fact that the audience is supposed to cry foul when Monokuma breaks the rules. So really, it'd be their decision as to whether they want Kaito to be simply cured as a "prize" for the students winning, or whether they want something else to happen to him to spice the story up. And even if we pretend that all of my Major Issues with the in-universe audience didn't exist and they were being written here as an actually realistic audience that enjoys watching life-or-death "fiction" with real people... even then, I wouldn't trust them to want an uncomplicated happy ending over more pain and suffering, not when pain and suffering is what they're here for.
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atzfiles · 5 years
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getting to know jeong yunho
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hi! i will be looking into yunhos natal chart and share some of the information i have gotten out of it! thanks to yunho, we know the exact time he was born! i am not entirely sure if the place of birth is that exact though. so as always, this is not 100% accurate and i am not saying i know everything about astrology. this is a hobby of mine which i taught myself.
Sun Aries 
aries is the first sign of the zodiac which shows in their characters
they’re always first to start and always first to finish
aries people are natural athletes which, in my opinion, fits to yunho quite nicely
they cannot sit still for longer periods of time
their natural instinct is to use their bodies to get things done
they live a “simple” live, dont like long/drawn out moments and they also dont like planning ahead
aries sun are known for being direct, straightforward and uncomplicated
they also tend to live in the moment
whatever happens right now is most important to an aries
this trait can make them very impatient but also highly innovative 
aries suns are also very brave 
they dont like the long way to a goal, they need to take the quickest route
they also have some childlike qualities which makes them real charmers
yunho has a strong personality, entrepreneurial spirit, ambitious, self-willed and stubborn
possible downsides of an aries sun: very nervous, impulsive, wasteful, provoking and restless
Sun in V
yunho wants to be recognized for what he is doing
he has a lot of unique and special qualities and he wants people to pay attention to those
he has a flair for drama and sports (now we all know what sorta high school student he was lmao)
yunho is proud of the fact that he has such a positive outlook on life
expressing himself brings him happiness
he needs to be careful because sometimes those things can make him look like an attention seeker to others
188 Conjunction Sun in Mercury
he owns a lot of mental energy because his ego and mind are on the same level
yunho is very intelligent and he takes pride in that
he also loves to communicate with other people
he talks and expects others to listen but he himself can have a hard time listening to others, that doesnt mean he dominates every conversation
and here you can see yet again that he has great joy in expressing himself
he studies best when reading over the material rather than listening (to a teacher for example)
this also comes from the strong need to communicate
yunho cant listen and absorb information well, he has to act on it
he has his own opinions and those are set
very independent thinker
if not listened to, he can get quite butthurt
he also cant handle criticism too well when it comes to his own opinions
he has a very witty, bashful and playful sense of humor
272 Conjunction Sun in Jupiter
extremely generous, helpful, good-hearted, well-informed, friendly and possesses strong morals
seems like luck is always on his side
he attracts good and positive things like a magnet
yunho is not very competitive which, as a result, is the reason why a lot of people like him
he also loves to travel because he is interested in foreign places and people
he has a lot of faith in life and people 
he does believe in orders and rules and generally dislikes people that tend to break the rules or even go against the law
very impatient with the wrong people around
he can be trusted very well, is sincere and is good at keeping promises
as mentioned before, very optimistic 
laughs very easily
240 Sextile Sun in Neptune
very sensitive and dreamy
strong appreciation for music
he is naturally very compassionate
very open minded; realizes that there is more to the world than whats in front of his eyes
yunho is attracted to spiritual subjects which works in favor for musicians and artists
he can be taken advantage of because he feels strongly for those who are suffering 
very humanitarian; adores animals
very imaginative, inspired and emotional 
Moon in Gemini
people who have their moon in gemini tend to be very witty and charming
but they can also become very moody and irritable, especially at home or with family
very curious 
a certain nervousness and worry are also known for lunar gemini
he needs way more stimulation than other people
there is a lot going on inside of him
here we can also see his urge to express himself again
lunar gemini think and talk a lot
they like their homes but tend to hate housework
yunho can get a bit messy
he does like improving his home though
re-organizing is something he seems to enjoy
very easily bored
is in touch with his own emotions but he can struggle with handling others complicated emotions
inside the family he is the one getting everyone together for a meeting
doesnt like repetitive routines
yunho likes having to do a lot of stuff
very sociable, friendly and talkactive
comfortable around a lot of people and can speak well in front of crowds
very open to new ideas
wants to talk about problems as soon as possible
sharp intellect
-57 Square Moon in Mercury 
his head and heart get in the way of each other
he can be too emotional or too logical
can be very jealous and possessive
can sometimes feel the need to change partners quickly because he gets bored
imaginative sense of humor
can be hypersensitive because of mood swings
because of the what he talks, yunho tends to misrepresent himself
very happy when he can escape in his own little world 
cant find his ideal world on the outside so he creates his own, imaginative world
loves drama but reacts negatively when he is the one getting criticism 
Mercury in Pisces
soaks up feelings and moods from the people around him
which can affect his own mood quite drastically 
very tactful, tries not to offend people
15 Trine Mercury in Lilith 
can get quite provocative in communications
sees flaws very quickly
Venus in Taurus 
likes sensual surroundings
looks like he would be a satisfying lover/partner
needs to be able to depend on his partner
can become very possessive of his partner
he needs “hands on” expressions of love
loyal
cant get pushed into a relationship
likes comfortable things
he needs a lot of time
his partner would need a lot of patience
“love arrives slowly, but with force”
Venus in VI
he wants to help sick and poor people all the time
wants a job in a medical or social setting
likes being of service to his partner
goes to extreme lengths so always be available for his partner
he isnt ‘showy’ with his love/bad at expressing it but much rather shows it by his availability, doing practical things for his partner or other thoughtful things
pays attention to small details
he is scared that, if the relationship he is currently in ends, he might not be able to find better
-224 Opposition Venus in Mars
from affairs over to full blown relationships; love is what gets this boy out of bed
this can get challenging in youth
he can have a hard time finding a relationship that meets his expectations
very creative
passion for romance is often channeled in his creative output
prone to have love-hate relationships (the fanfics have been right all along)
can get angry quickly but that anger disappears just as fast as it came
likes truth and justice
he never plays false, his sentiments are deep and sincere
might be into someone older because he appreciates peoples intelligence 
-95 Square Venus in Neptune
his ideals are not always easy to achieve 
easy going
yunho is in love with being in love
very romantic
can be a little too romantic; his romantic dreams might get shattered by the reality of relationships
sees what he wants to see rather than what really is
clings to romantic delusion which can be very dangerous and unhealthy
tends to devote his all to someone who is unreachable
he is also prone to loving someone who treats him badly all while he is clinging to an idealized image of his partner
he thinks that loving someone requires self-sacrifice 
:((
Mars in Scorpio
likes to challenge himself to do the impossible
keeps his cool on the surface very well
does not let people in easily 
scorpio in mars is known for having the strongest sexual stamina
even though he tends to dislike people who break the rules, he often fantasizes about breaking taboos
he like the scenario of their partner giving into them, wants his partner completely and will do absolutely anything for them
im sweating
his sexual appeal is strong enough to get what he wants
very jealous, doesnt want to share
doesnt find pleasure in compromises: needs to hear either yes or no
constantly tests himself and others
thinks that life isnt fair  
Mars in XII
puts all of his energy into his working life
likes to research
jobs like a doctor, teacher, police officer would fit him well
he should try to give things a real shot instead of feeling defeated instantly 
he can handle a lot of things by himself in his own unique ways
works more for others than himself
ignores his own needs and desires for others which secretly makes him very angry
takes time for him to warm up to a new sexual partner
likes to solve problems
likes to overcome obstacles
he sometimes can seem cold when he is in his work-mindset
-117 Square Mars in Uranus
tends to be eccentric and too headstrong, impatient
Jupiter in Aries
attracts good things in life
he is initiating, inspiring, enthusiastic and brave
likes doing things on his own
likes games
gets distracted easily
lucky in love and his profession
adores children
generous 
yunho likes helping people in difficulty
Saturn in Taurus 
dislikes greedy people
needs to learn that he is also deserving of good things in life
likes precision
a true worker
possesses all the necessary qualities to be successful in the medical field
Uranus in Aquarius
gets overly excited when starting a task but quickly loses interest
this can give others a banal impression of him
doesnt like routines
-10 Square Uranus Lilith
he can have difficulty finding a peaceful love life because he is the type to fall in love at first sight
seeks adventures which can be harmful to his relationship
Neptune in Aquarius
generosity 
solves other peoples problems just to see them happy
cold facts are hard for him to absorb#
he can get quite nostalgic
Pluto in Sagittarius
love and sexuality are idealized
Ascendent in Scorpio
he has a lot of presence
their manners command respect and he lets people know he shouldnt get pushed around
very powerful and determined 
he can look right through people which can make him very intimidating 
he often gets confused when he earns such strong reactions from people though
yunho likes to read between the lines
values his privacy a lot, so much that it can even cause paranoia
he feels the strong urge to always be in control of his environment 
he plans out every move very carefully and lets no one look into his plans
he is drawn to down to earth and natural partners on which he can rely on
he needs full commitment because flighty partners make his patience run thin
House II in Capricorn
he sees spending and making money as an adventure which can cause financial risks for him
nothing is left to a chance
likes to calculate his plans and dissects them slowly
House IV in Aquarius
he may leave the family home very early on
wants a life that is out of the ordinary 
doesnt like traditions 
House VIII in Gemini
this placement is known for making artistic people generally very successful
House X in Leo
great leadership qualities
the way he is seen by society grows more important to him as he gets older
wants surround himself with equally artistic/influentiual people
if you really read this far...god bless u lmao
i tried keeping this as short as possible, leaving out some constantly repetitive traits and placements and trying to combine his placements rather than to dive into each one individually. please dont forget that i am doing this purely out of fun and interest. My ask box/messages are always open if you want to talk or have questions! please also let me know which member you want me to analyze next :)
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rgr-pop · 5 years
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im not sure what my take is! on one hand it's kinda shady that theyve been selling there since 2018 and haven't been public about it, but on the other hand there's no actual guarantee/proof that post-market testing has or will impact their products. theyre taking a gamble and some liberties with the CF label. also, like, where's the line for "ethical" and "cruelty free". like CFK is selling a rose quartz roller (appropriative of jade rollers?) with no info re: the quartz source so i really dunno
I mostly agree! I still don’t really know how I feel about the postmarket testing in China thing. 
One thing I will say is: there kind of is a hard line about what “cruelty free” means and I think that is actually why, for whatever its limitations, the cruelty-free movement has maybe been one of the most politically effective consumer movements I have seen unfold. But it gets complicated: “cruelty free” was coined to be euphemistic and sentimental, and that was successful for them, but it remains confusing even for people in the biz over and over again, precisely because it claims an ethical ground that satisfies very little. The movement is effective BECAUSE it narrowly targeted animal testing for cosmetics, not various other forms of so-called cruelty. Now people are like: so what next?
I personally feel almost uncomplicated about the issue of animal testing: it’s an industry--there are companies who profit off of other companies “needing” to test ingredients to make and sell cosmetics--that basically exists to perpetuate (1) itself (the industry wants us to have to test on animals so that it can continue making money off of the industry of animal testing) (iirc there is more info on this kind of thing when it comes to vivisection, if you are curious) (2) myths about government regulation that allow people to believe that the state is asking private industry to be accountable to consumers, which is it not. (added to that: we think being accountable to consumers is enough, when it is not.) so in sum I think the whole thing is a scam. even though I don’t necessarily think that the progress that has been made to roll back cosmetic animal testing has been that impactful on a larger scale, I think we should all take it seriously as a successful movement and ask how we can learn from it. in particular I’m fascinated by how willing to adhere to a CF lifestyle a lot of people have been even as they otherwise doubt the power of a boycott--I think there is more to it than just “people love the concept of cute animals.” many sides of this issue have just been tossing bumper sticker slogans around for a decade now and I think it’s silly. 
[above paragraph is US centric, although to be fair a lot of the progress that has been made has been in europe--I know a lot less about that]
What I’m not so sure about is the issue in China, I need to read a lot more. Are we aiming to pressure the state to reform these regulations? Do they benefit Chinese consumers who could otherwise be exploited by American companies that are already exploiting them in other ways? What does the economy of testing look like there? I do not know!
Couldn’t agree with you more re: quartz. Quartz is an “easy” example that points to a much more difficult and endemic one (mineral mining for cosmetics). I’m not totally educated there, in part because it is so complex, but I wonder what we can learn or not learn about, say, mica, from the CF movement. My sense is that the CF movement has been as successful as it has been in part because cosmetics are a small part of a larger animal science industry, from which many brands can easily disentangle themselves. (The rise in dominance of companies that are not part of larger conglomerates has been a major factor in the success of the CF movement, and the force of the CF movement has very obviously been a factor in the boom of a new “independent” cosmetic economy, which is partially why the WnW thing has been so sad and so interesting: WnW’s mythic CF status was related to the sense--which imo they cultivated--that they were an independent brand, which they weren’t.) So while I believe that it’s an easy and uncomplicated choice to end animal testing for makeup, that alone doesn’t necessarily end the testing industry more broadly. The mineral problem kind of looks like that: we have a hard time targeting the issue because cosmetic mica is nested into larger problems of minerals for other kinds of paint and pigment and, even more, construction industries. That’s the hugest challenge--that and the problem of uh we do not want to stop having mica for cosmetics, do we, especially not when we are looking for “natural” alternatives to microplastics. But I do remain optimistic, actually, about the beauty consumer base as potentially a hugely powerful political bloc, if we were to mobilize strategically. (I do not think the sentimentality of the CF movement will serve this issue very well, though, “child labor” campaigns have not been that successful in world history so far, I don’t think...)
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destressjournal · 3 years
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DCOM Rankings # 90: Let it Shine
Right off the bat: this was a MUCH easier watch than radio rebel, it was basically night and day! (Which is why this review is coming out quicker than I thought it would). It was really refreshing and it’s a little sad this movie doesn’t get enough recognition because, spoiler alert, it was pleasantly surprising!
I’m also first gonna say that im a little surprised that the actor from everybody hates Chris wanted to do a DCOM. I guess since EHC was slightly more mature show and DCOMS are obviously way more kid friendly. But I’m not complaining too much over here, I think overall he was a great match for the character of Cyrus. Actually the casting for everybody was great! I have 0 complaints about that. The only thing I will say about the main actor (I’m terrible I don’t remember his name) when he smiles it really looks like he’s in pain. Maybe it’s a cringe smile, in which case I completely understand. We all know how these movies are, don’t kid yourself. Everything else about the actors, great, amazing, spectacular!!
I’m going to address the cringiness of some of the scenes in this movie, and while I personally didn’t identify anything that was racist, this is one of the few DCOMS that focus on a mostly black cast, and it surrounds the rap/hiphop culture. I’m sure there was something offensive in there but I can’t really comment on that...not that I’m looking for offensive content it’s just that implicit bias is a big problem even at Disney. And the more we educate about the small things the less they will occur or teach about them, cuz racism is learned, it’s not natural.
Now, that all being said, I do like that they get audiences comfortable with rap music. Like me for example, I hated rap music and just flat out refused to listen to it for the longest time. Basically I was like Cyrus’ dad except I wasn’t like at his level I just personally prefer songs that I can actually sing along to. But I still had that bias like I just refused to listen to it no matter what it was, and I had a friend tell me once that “you might find you might like some rap songs if you look at the lyrics” and I realized how biased I actually was. I refused to listen to any type of rap but now I realized once I started listening to some of these popular rap songs that there are some deep meaning behind some of these lyrics. I’m still never going to love rap just because it’s not my cup of tea and that’s okay, but I now appreciate it for being another way folks can express themselves and get their message out. However, still don’t like the rap songs that just talk about sex and drugs. But I guess there’s musical lyrics that just talk about sex and drugs too so...ehhhh. Anyway. Point is, I appreciate rap’s place in society today, even if I’m still not the biggest fan of it.
Sooooo yeah! This is one of those “I can sing (rap) but I’m too shy/scared to do it in front of other people, even though I clearly show I’m very good. And the lesson here is to always express yourself. Something like that. DCOM’s have done this so many times at this point it’s not even funny anymore. And I’m like 99.9% sure it won’t be the last time. It’s such an easy uncomplicated lesson to teach to kids.
At least with this movie they do make it at least a little bit different than the other movies. Not a LOT different but enough to still make it entertaining. And thank the lord above that the characters actually seem like REAL PEOPLE, albeit, DCOM versions of real people but still! It’s in the right direction (compared to the last disaster movie).
Okay where to start with this....the characters? I like them! The main ones anyway. That “villain” rapper dude, who was also in star struck, was probably my least favorite, but not just because he was the antagonist and we are supposed to hate him, but I think he could have been developed a bit more, and maybe somewhat redeemed at the end. But that’s just me. The ending was fine, and maybe DCOMS have a habit of redeeming their antagonists and this was one of the times where they didn’t. Maybe that’s more realistic. So who knows.
Anyway, all the other characters are great and have their role in the story like they should. Cyrus is the shy protagonist, Chris is the foil for Cyrus, he looks like a rap music star (DCOM version), but can’t rap a beat. Cyrus doesn’t look the part but he can make lyrics fly off a page. Roxie is the “girl prize at the end” which I hate when movies do that, but at least she fights them a little about it before they get their happy ending.
If there’s one thing I don’t like about the ending. It was a little rushed. And Roxie took the biggest blow. That intense scene with Chris and Cyrus, where she told them she was never taking to them again, basically meant nothing when she’s completely fine after Chris forces her to listen to him about Cyrus. And everyone’s just happy and they play the happy song and then the credits roll.
WHAT. that’s it?? That was the only thing that really upset me. You want to know my favorite part(s) of the movie??
The main characters actually APOLOGIZE in a very genuine way that doesn’t seem too overreaching or unrealistic! Chris realized what his proposed fame was doing to him, he was living a lie and the guilt was destroying him. Plus it had to have been exhausting trying to come up with ways so he couldn’t perform live. His apology to Cyrus was an amazing scene and I was just so surprised because usually main characters are just like “I’m sorry, friends?” And they hug and that’s it. Even if Roxie forgave the boys too quickly, their apologies were so sincere. And now I know that both of them grew as characters throughout the movie.
The songs themselves were okay. Nothing particularly special. But again, it was mostly rap music so it didn’t grab me like it does with other types of music. But like I said, that’s okay, and they’re not bad songs, just not my cup of tea. But these guys do have talent, I will definitlely give them that!
Overall I really liked it. It wasn’t the best DCOM I’ve ever seen but it really did surpass my expectations. And if I ever found myself watching it again for some reason I wouldn’t complain. Despite the overused moral, it found a way to at least make it fresh and flow along with the story. The characters don’t really make outlandish or out-of-character decisions. (Except for the very end of the movie). Everything felt genuine and real. Within the context of the movie that is.
I’m going to give this a straight B as a grade. I don’t think this is quite A-tier because it doesn’t feel big enough, but it’s definitely still a high quality movie. But who knows what will happen when I use my new ranking system at the end of all this.
Okayyyy well I think this movie was the last movie I’ve seen trailers for. I’m really headed into unknown territory here with this next one. Wish me luck!
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nursexpeditions · 5 years
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i’m bracing for the worst and hoping for the best, trying to make sense of the madness in my head
I felt so much that I started to feel nothing. One of the hardest battles we fight is between what we know and what we feel. It’s both a blessing and a curse to feel everything so very deeply. I withdraw from people and places from time to time. I need space from a world that is filled with millions of mouths that talk too much but never have anything good to say. 
These thoughts, they’re sharp enough to tear through my bare skin, through my muscle, then slowly eat away at my bones, and before you know it, they’re cutting away at my heartstrings. My heart beats, so loud and so fast that you’d think I was running for the gold medal at an Olympics event. Anxiety so fierce not even a Xanax or a bottle of liquor would be able to calm the storm I’m fighting. All i see is the slow erosion of self, as insidious as cancer, and like cancer, it is essentially a solitary experience, a room in hell with only my name on the door.
I hear “what's wrong” or “you’re overthinking.” A blank screen appears in my head and I think to myself who have I become? What has made me into this monster? I look in the mirror and only do I realize that it’s been me this whole time. How inconvenient when you’re the firestorm burning everything in your path. 
“But he that dares not grasp the thorn, should never crave the rose.”
In these instances, I wanted to tell you how impossible it feels in these situations. It’s like trying to hold water in the palm of your hands, like trying to prevent an ice cube from melting in the summer, like attempting to run through the water. It’s not possible, yet here I try so hard. 
Someone with anxiety is inclined to assume everyone is going to leave. So much so that sometimes they might be the ones to ruin a relationship. I ruined many things that could’ve been amazing just because I was sad. 
The truth is, I battle something I can’t control and there is a sense of insecurity within myself when it comes to relationships. It’s hard sometimes. I create stupid fights of scenarios that I created in my head. I’m going to jump from point A to point B without even knowing all the details, and sometimes you’re not even going to understand how I got there. The best thing you can do for me is understanding how I went off on that tangent. Even if there’s no solution, the act of listening helps. I know in your eyes, it might seem irrational; but to me, it’s something that actually keeps me up at night, and I probably won’t sleep through the night because of it. It’s definitely not that I don’t trust you, but because I’m more scared than anything. 
It’s every worst-case scenario automatically playing out in my head and trust me, I already hate myself for it. By now you’ve probably noticed how fast i answer you, and for example, it helps when you say i can’t talk right now and this is why i’ll text you later. Silence kills anyone with anxiety and creates a hostile environment for problems that aren’t even there. It ends in apologies that aren’t even needed and adds layers of stress to my life that I wish i could control. 
I’ve realized my anxiety manifests in two ways, i’ll either be quiet and awkward, or you’ll be carrying me out as I choose my poison to ease my worries. Whether its a night out gone wrong, or an essay of a text saying or doing the wrong thing, I’m very observant and pick up on the slightest shift in behavior.
I would rather have meltdowns biting off more than I can chew because I have a hard time admitting I can’t handle something. I will always say yes and I will never turn anyone away which is my biggest weakness. I say help when you can but know when you can’t because I’m inclined to not ask for help since I’m used to dealing with things on my own.
..But that’s exactly where i’m flawed. The deepest pain i ever felt was denying my own feelings to make everyone else comfortable. Just because I bury something doesn’t mean that it stops existing. I was willing to suffer as long as you had what you wanted in life to make you happy. Where do you draw the line in sacrificing too much of yourself to make a relationship work? 
For a while, I kept telling myself I was dealing with it the way that i am currently and doing this for the success of our relationship and that was enough for me at the time, but if i’m being honest, the more I think about it and the more time i spend with you, the more i want to move on with my life with you and if you feel the same, i need to feel or see that you’re taking the steps to as well. 
I get that the situation itself is complicated, but lets face it, that will never change. It’s like we’re waiting for it to miraculously uncomplicate itself one day, but in reality, it never will. I realize now i’ve been waiting for a day that will never come. Because at the end of each day, what are we REALLY waiting for? What will taking more time do for anyone? You and her will forever have history. You and her will always be close friends. You are a part of her life just as you are a part of mine and that’s something i’ve accepted just as she’s accepted that I am your significant other now (so you say). IThe most important question here is, what will waiting or taking up more time do for anyone? More time to be prepare ourselves? More time to be “ready” to face the inevitable? If anything, we are only prolonging the inevitable. 
But hey, you did have a point, there is a certain justified amount of “time” we should take before going to the next step, but that justified length of time for that window, in my opinion, has certainly passed.
I continually feel like the bad guy whenever i tell you that i’m uncomfortable with your interactions with her. It first started just as hanging out with her, but then it got more complicated to having to switch off being butters caretaker, traveling from city to city, at times having to be okay with your stay over for your own health and well being, and honestly the hard truth is that i’m just expected to deal with it. I know you ask and try to do things that will help alleviate all my anxiety but when will enough be enough? now family interactions? i didn’t even think it could get worse, and i must sound like the most fucking horrible selfish devil human being on this fucking planet because who in their right mind is even uncomfortable in a situation like this? I mean that takes one special fucked up person??? 
If we put all the cards on the table, its clear that I don’t think anyone will ever truly be prepared or ready for this, but it’s a bridge that needs to be crossed for the health of this relationship and i hope that you agree with me. I need to know i’ll be set up for success moving forward in this relationship because it’s absolutely nearly impossible to be supportive of you, trying to be supportive of her, let alone someone that has always been a threat to me. Its just not a good feeling for me. If she’s not a threat to me, then please help me see that. I want to be able to communicate with the people that are closest to you without feeling like i’m in the shadows. I don’t know how i’m supposed to go on knowing there’s this microportion of you that i want to know that i know nothing about because we aren’t ready to face the music. I need some sort of assurance that there will be steps taken to facilitate this change i think is essential to our relationship.
My thoughts have driven me so far that I’ve had completely absurd thoughts where there’s an instance where I can’t go out with your chino friends with you because she’s there but then when she’s not its absolutely okay to come. I used to make excuses that would validate me not going because i dont know them, but i’ve met and hung and talked to all of them and i’d say we all get along. But what do you do when those “overthinking” thoughts actually turn into reality? I don’t think i’ve told you but I’ve been in situation that I presumed worst-case scenario in my head that has permanently scarred me and has worsened my anxiety episodes since. In a perfect world, I imagine a future with both my friends and your friends in one room regardless of their relationship to you or i and i think thats why it’s so important to me to move forward and finally get some peace of mind. 
I know my feelings are valid and it has been reinforced many times. We have plenty conversation about its importance and therefore I know that my feelings matter and are important. I’m continually uncomfortable in this situation and something has to change. Im not proud of any of this because i know that it’s so fucking ugly to feel and be this way and it’s unattractive more than anything and i feel so fucking ashamed of myself having to even stoop this low. I feel an itching desire to tear off my own skin on my body to get myself out of the outfit i hate most on myself, on my own person. I itch to be better for you and constantly feel like i’m failing myself, failing you, failing us for not being able to get over my fucking self and tormenting thoughts. 
As i dig deeper into my core, i find that it’s most terrifying for me because I’ve never met someone capable of calming my storm. Those overwhelming anxious grey heavy clouds weighing over my shoulders or those lonely strikes of anxiety and depression. But you hold my hand and I swear my breaths come easier; maybe you make me feel safe, or maybe your smile pushes the hurricane out into the ocean.
If there’s something I’m good at in this life, its love. If there’s something I will stand for and be proud of in this body of mine, it’s my ability to show you how much i adore and appreciate you. It took a while to build trust, but now that we’re in this place, my hope is that my capacity to love you will fill you in ways you didn’t know were empty or even missing something. My one hope is that you can see past my imperfections and fight to help waver through them with me. I endure because i love. I survive because I endure. I win because I love.
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jigmit-growlie-blog · 7 years
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KingsRoad Tool
Well…imagine my delight. You will choose from a few amounts - black party, archer, or mage (though the archer elegance rests right behind a person Structurally, the sport is standalone from dungeons, overland, tournaments, as well as your area which capabilities much like a central hub. |Similar to these diablo or torchlight, your identity provides a complete paperdoll machine for ones machines. products, and likewise variety prices gems. These lump your invasion competencies, cooldown timers, spruce up your mana regeneration, provide a larger being area - the most common rpg fare. Kira the apprentice is likely to be posting her minions to take on sub-plans that think about realistic-culture time, There's the whole guild machine in Kingsroad Hack Online. 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Kingsroad Hack
The game is very straight-forward, irregardless for anybody who is utilizing a key pad and computer mouse, or possibly a touchscreen display screen. truly is all managed obtaining a computer mouse, giving utilisation of potions and restoratives with key pad mouse clicks as an alternative to screen details. You will undertake minions for all the little bit, you will fight more substantial minions, you will kill another person in control, then loot comes on the ground. |introduce groups above brutes. Gems is often gained simply by grinding out successes and journey dreams. Being the hand bags satisfy, you will learn about that you are currently in thing of gems and producing powders to keep watch over for updating your socketed gear. Getting rid of foes and building destructables raises your scores, with reward returns needing reaching milestones. 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KingsRoad Bot
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Profit Builder 2 Media Reports
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