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#I could probably discuss this better if i didnt always feel like an impostor. I always feel like im faking everything and am abusing the
mrfoox · 1 year
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Oliver ranting about politics for 30 mins: that was a good talk (:
Me, who have said like nothing: (: nice
#miranda talking shit#Also: oliver: complaining that there are people who get money without giving the proper papers etc#Me: -crying bc i remember hpw fucking awful it is having to handle that and then still get called and questioned about it etc-#Oliver: what did i make you sad? Did i say something mean? Why are you sad????#Bro buddy... Im remembering the trauma of having to prove to the government im not mentally stable both by providing 15 different papers#And then having them call me constantly and wanting me to explain everything and i felt like some kind of impostor#I mean i get what he means theres probably a lot of people who gets money without providing all the correct things etc but like holy hell#Can also say theres probably a big amount of people who avoid even trying to get support they are entitled to bc they know its an#Exhausting battle. I probably wouldn't have bothered at all if i didnt get help from others to fix all the paperwork i needed to even apply#And even with that help it was so fucking daunting... Thinking about it gives me mad anxiety and makes me tear up its ridiculous :')#I could probably discuss this better if i didnt always feel like an impostor. I always feel like im faking everything and am abusing the#System and goverment money. Despite having add+autism along with deppression/anxiety disorders and i literally have doctors who have writtn#That miranda dont and cant function as normal people and need more help. Still im like... Oh no im faking... Im stealing...im a fraud...#I guess its bc its not... 'obviously' something wrong with me so i feel bad for even saying something. Its bc its me#Anyone else says the same things as me im like yeah thats understandable... But me? God no i am a waste of space and i should die
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