#after they did something pretty selfish and thoughtless and are the type too proud to apologise/want everyone to move on | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

ladysqueakinpip · 7 years

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every. single. one. of those OC questions, and the ones that you have to have a specific OC pick whoever you want, but make sure a couple of them are Darrvi and Taffel and Abbe and I think you have a fairy lady? or a dryad lady? or both? do them too, for whatever ones you want

i’m going to talk about so many ocs.

1. Do any of your OCs have a speech impediment?

heykel talks with a stutter! i’m not sure if this counts as an impediment but amytis’ voice is naturally very quiet so she has a hard time contributing to large conversations or arguments not because she doesn’t want to say anything but because people never hear what she says haha.

2. Do any of your OCs have a physical disability?

hmmm well my side fantroll syddie (who i hardly ever talk about r i p) has bowed legs from a trauma injury. she has to wear leg braces to talk. again, i’m not sure if this counts as a disability but since elian’s epileptic & not medicated he has to be careful going up and down stairs or swimming/bathing and it does put a limit on the types of activities he can do in the day.

3. What is your OCs favorite band if they have one?

okay well since u said darrvi first here he comes. darrvi would like music similar to john mayer and jason mraz. he probably knows a couple underground bands but they’re like. pop underground. they’re not really underground just sorta underground. it’s also a little known darrvi-fact that he enjoys listening to ke$ha music.

4. Does your OC have anything they take pride in? (like an award or collection?)

and taffel is next. is it bad to say i feel like he likes his stupid ripped up jeans? the ones he literally just cuts with a chainsaw? he probably likes that dumb varsity jacket i’m always drawing him in. so i guess the answer is a couple clothing items but he’s not a very materialistic person. other than the jeans and jacket i feel like he’s really proud of his physical fitness. he works really hard to keep it up lol.

5. Does your OC have a favorite film?

abbe’s favorite film…. uh…. hard to say since they don’t actually have movies in EG? abbe strikes me as the type of person who would like those cheesy family-oriented hallmark movies. he marathons the christmas movies in december.

6. How tall is your OC?

i’m assuming by “fairy lady” you mean maya! i haven’t made official heights for them yet but judging from my character reference sheet she’s near 5′9″ or 5′10″!

7. Does your OC have any celebrity crushes?

by dryad-lady do you mean lia merson? if so i don’t think she does! she was made for @pidgenerd ‘s story and i don’t think there’s an easy way to spread news in her world like we have in ours with TV/phones/radio/internet and all that media. i doubt lia really knows much about the world outside of her small tree community lol. besides, even if she had time for celebrities, she’s got a crush on @topazpearl ‘s kurama anyway *u*

8. Do you ship any 2 of your OCs?

um….. ya. a lot. elianXanneliese, abbeXrosalie, rolandXjeannine, irenaXdwayne the rock johnson, darrvitaffel, heykeltaffel, bodrumamytis, akhettalekah, whatever the heck is going on between fidias/paatni, and even though heykel/amytis blackrom is literal filth i still like the idea of it bye.

those are just the ships with ONLY my characters lol come back later for more swaggie shipping.

9. How would you describe your OCs fashion taste?

i’m gonna go back to maya on this because i really love her and i don’t talk about her a lot. maya likes dresses! bright colors and intricate, detailed patterns. this is a good example. also this. i feel like everything she wears could be described as a maxi dress or a sun dress.

10. Does your OC have any special talents?

u wanted more darrvi and taffel??? i’ll give you more darrvi and taffel. darrvi’s a decent baker? he sticks to making pies and cupcakes. i bet darrvi’s super secret talent is being able to find really good albums/movies/games in those giant “discount” bins you see at walmart. he goes to the clearance section or to thrift stores and gets really nice pairs of pants for $3. taffel on the other hand is a sculptor. he’s made a couple trinkets for leaena. he likes to work with clay and wood the most i bet he always has dirt under his nails. or splinters in his hands. his super secret talent is bumping up against vending machines and being able to knock a soda or a bag of chips out for free. he’s the guy who checks the slot to see if someone left a soda there and he always finds one.

11. Is your OC really bad at something?

darrvi is really bad at styling his hair. it just floofs up and poofs all over the place and he’s sick of it but he’s given up. he seems like he’s bad at making a decision and sticking with it good grief i feel like half of his life problems stem from the fact that he just doesn’t know what he wants.

taffel is really bad at cooking oh my gosh. no wonder darrvi can bake he had to learn for the both of them. i think taffel’s issue is that he’s that person who thinks “oh yea i can multitask i’ve got this” and before he knows it dinner is burnt, the laundry’s been sitting out for 2 hours, he didn’t vacuum up that mess in the living room and he forgot to call leaena back.

12. Does your OC have both of their parents?

maya’s dad died before EG starts. i’m sure her mother is still around but after her dad died she just left home and the rest of her family for something bigger.

lia does have both her parents but her dad is out working & traveling a lot since he’s a merchant. she lingers around her tree home with her mom and waits for dad to bring them treats and money from his travels.

13. Does your OC know their parents?

I HAVE TO KEEP ANSWERING THESE FOR LIA AND MAYA BECAUSE TROLLS DON’T HAVE ANY PARENTS RIP!!! but yes! they both know both of their parents.

14. Does your OC have any siblings?

maya has a lot of siblings! i’m thinking her family might have five children total, though i haven’t decided entirely on the birth order + genders of her siblings. i was thinking 2 older brothers and 2 younger sisters? this could change don’t hold me to it.

lia doesn’t have any other siblings. :’( it’s very sad and lonely but when your mother is a dryad and your father is a human obviously things aren’t going to work out perfectly.

15. Do any of your OCs have pets?

my oc kate has a pet canary! i’ve been toying with the idea of giving elian a service dog. his brother roland has some horses.

i don’t think trolls really have pets? so i guess none of my trolls have pets.

16. Do you have any nonhuman OCs?

no one from EG is a human and none of my trolls are humans haha. lia merson’s a dryad…. talise is some weird otter-anthro furry…. i think my only human ocs are my fankids? and faige and kaleb.

17. Do you have any OCs you haven’t posted about?

i have a couple of new dryads in the works for lia’s world, actually! but i don’t know anything about them i just wanted to draw more tree girls so i did.

i’ve also been thinking up a couple phoenix ocs from another part of the EG map but there’s not much happening with them.

18. How would you describe your OCs nature in one word?

watch me do darrvi and taffel again because i’m predictable. i think darrvi’s word would be “hopeful”? he wants the best for himself and for the people he loves so he comes up with elaborate schemes to make everything work out haha. he wants to believe that there’s some goodness in a world that’s so dark and violent. he gets let down a lot but somehow he’s muscled through.

i think taffel’s word is “self-centered”, but in more than one way. i mean he is pretty selfish and a lot of his actions are thoughtless and only benefit himself but i think that’s because he has a hard time connecting & understanding other people on an emotional level? so he ends up having this little world that’s just his and he doesn’t consider the impact of his actions on other people until after he’s done something.

19. Who is your youngest OC?

paseri! she’s only 11.

20. Who is your oldest OC?

i guess technically bodrum is the oldest since he’s like 200+ years old but um. we don’t talk about that and physically/mentally/emotionally he’s around 15 so uh. yea. otherwise i think my oldest is elian’s doctor/irena’s dad? he’s somewhere in his 50s-60s.

21. What race is your OC?

since most of my ocs aren’t human i don’t think i can answer this one? no one’s technically white/black/asian/etc. heck, maya is blue. all my fankids are just white. kaleb’s white. faige is biracial but i haven’t decided if her mom is black and her dad is white or if her dad is black and her mom is white.

22. Would your OC like you?

of course they like me everyone likes me -shot-

#Anonymous #oc stuff #lets T-A-L-K-A-B-O-U-T about ocs #THIS TOOK SO LONG KDJALKJLDAJKLS but i enjoyed it thanks #if u read thru all that u deserve to know every spoiler in EG bye

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moidse · 4 years

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Dear ****— I just finished watching big brother and putting pain ointment on my back and I miss you. I read your email from six months ago, and I see all of the hurt that was and is still there. I’m sorry that I played into existing issues and further broke your trust, and I understand if you have trouble trusting me again. I sincerely hope that we can find a way to rebuild it, and I am willing to put in all of the work to make that happen. You once messaged me saying you wanted me to feel fully loved, and I want that so much for you. I love you so much I feel like it doesn’t even translate, but I want you to know and feel it all the time, and I want to know how you are best loved. I want you to feel happy and safe, because you make me feel happy and safe. I remember when I was reading that attachment theory book that they talked about physical stress lessening when you are with a partner, and that is definitely true when I am with you. I just love being with you. I love your jokes, and how you make me try to laugh, and I love hearing your ideas—it was so nice to hear some of them Friday night, and so sweet that it made you happy I wanted to listen to them. Of course I want to listen to them. I support you and your work, and I want to be there for you—not just creatively, but emotionally, socially, and physically too. I have never opened up so much to someone, and it makes me feel so good when you open up to me too. It is so good to be near you. I love when I’m making heart-eyes at you and you make heart-eyes back at me—I hope you know what I mean; that soft look of being in love. I want to thank you for showing up so hard for me the past few weeks—you have really been there for me while I’m upset and confused, and have kept me more grounded and calm. I truly appreciate the work that you’ve put into making me feel that way—it’s a big deal to me. I don’t know what I would do without you as a support, and I hope that you feel as supported by me as I do by you. I am so, so sorry for what I did six months ago. It was inexcusable, inconsiderate, thoughtless, rude, and hurtful. I hurt you, and I am so sorry that I did. It hurts me when you hurt. I said this back in our first email exchange about this, but it wasn’t ok for me to rush you into a conversation over the phone when you had told me that you wanted to have it over email. It also wasn’t ok to ignore your discomfort on the phone, which I did with my actions. That crossed a boundary, and I’m sorry. I wasn’t listening to you. Since then, I have tried to show up for you and listen to you, and to pay closer attention to your boundaries and needs. Your needs and feelings are so important to me, and it is inexcusable that I didn’t take them into consideration—over the course of being non-monogamous, I feel like I did this several times, and I understand how this fed into a pattern of mistrust, and echoed the experiences you had in the past. I hope I have shown that this relationship is not like those past ones—that your needs are respected and important. I just want you to feel secure and safe, which is why I want to be monogamous, because it helps you to feel that way. Your security and happiness is really important to me. I’m sorry that I threatened both of those things. It’s really unfair to you that my learning curve for non monogamy hurt you in the process, and I’m so sorry I subjected you to that. Like I said before, I fucked up several times by not clearly asking you your boundaries, in a forum you wanted to be asked. I learned so much over the course of that time, and have made it a priority to listen to your boundaries now. I will continue working on this—I don’t want you to feel stepped over ever again. I also am so sorry that I lied by omission for six months. I was scared and selfish, and that only hurt you further. I need to work on giving other people agency to make decisions about me, and that means being radically honest. I have not lied to you about anything else, and I will never lie again. I also am committed to working on putting your feelings before my fear/anxiety (and being honest about when that anxiety occurs, which you deserve). I love you so much, and that means being accountable and facing the consequences of my mistakes. I hope that those consequences include a continued relationship, but I understand—though I would be devastated—if they don’t. Regardless I am really committed to changing my behavior, and to putting your healing at the center of any next steps which come out of this. If you don’t want to respond to this email, I get it, and I am not trying to rush you. I just want to fully apologize and make it right. I’ll be available basically any time this week to talk, if you want to talk. I love you so much, *****

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It’s like this is nice that they sent this apology and acknowledged my pain and that what they did was selfish and not right but idk.. I don’t know if things can be rebuilt. I understand making a mistake, but waiting 6 months to say something hurts a lot too. there’s something ironic to me about me not feeling sexually compatible/satisfied in this relationship but you are the one who has gotten to date someone else and who cheated and made out with someone else.

It sucks because we have built this relationship together. your my best friend. Even though you hurt me, it still was hard to see you so hurt last night. i feel bad because you are going through a lot right now. and thank you for acknowledging my support, i was really trying to be there for you. Idk i feel kind of silly trying to work things out.

i have felt so upset and like just a punch in the gut all day. my mind was like in shock and i had waves of disbelief. I just never thought you were that type of person... the way you behaved that night... calling me and forcing this conversation at like 1am and trying to coax me it wouldn’t mean anything and it would be fine, i thought that night was hard enough and to now learn you went home with them anyways and just never told me. it just makes me feel stupid. I just thought you weren’t like that but I guess I was wrong. I just felt overwhelmed with sadness, disappointment, and shock. Also like why does literally everyone cheat on me?

I appreciate you saying you won��t lie to me again or withhold information that you know is important to share with me. While we are airing out moments we aren’t proud of I do have something to admit. Maybe 2 months ago or so, before I had fixed my laptop-- one time when i was using your laptop i did creep onto your secret twitter. I know this was a violation of boundaries and was unacceptable. I felt very bad after I did it and was too scared to admit what I had done. It was stupid because looking at your secret twitter just made me feel sad. And it was none of my business reading any of that and making myself feel bad. I was just skimming through it trying to find any posts about me. it hurt seeing all of your lovey posts with ori and mocking the fact that it would bother me if you posted those things on ur main. i was surprised to see the timeline for how long you were hanging with steph and that you considered them to be ur crush. I didn’t realize you both would go to each others works and stuff as well. I felt like you very much down played this person to me, first describing them as a “person you kiss” when they were a crush and someone you’d visit at work. It hurt the most probably seeing you take screenshots of me flirting with you and mocking me to your friends. That one def hurt and i was in tears reading your private tweets. It was awful. I just left quickly the next day because I felt so bad. But I had no right to bring up my feelings being hurt about what you post in private. I feel like seeing you mock me flirting with you early on hurt so much because i was putting myself out there trying so hard and for you to be secretly laughing at me and mocking my insecurities. you also posted screenshots of me being insecure and asking for validation to make me seem less ~smooth~ and it was like ahhh i cant unsee. but idk i did do that and you should know. i promise i wont do it again. and I was afraid to tell you because it would hurt you deeply and it was an invasion of your privacy and I know it would be something hard to forgive me for. But I am sorry for crossing your boundaries, not communicating that happened, and disrespecting you in this way.

I’m not sure we will be able to rebuild our trust in each other. This all really hurt me and I’m sure I’ve just hurt you. I’ve been pretty open with my feelings in the past several months varying. I definitely do not think I am as attached as you are to me than I am to you. I believe that’s what you meant last night saying you feel like you love me more. My feelings will come and go because I just keep coming back to the thought that we are not sexually compatible and I feel like something is missing for me. It sucks but I do believe it’s true. I was very patient with you waiting for you to gain trust and feel comfortable around me. It wasn’t until a few months ago I touched you for the first time and you went down on me for the first time. Because of this time waiting to have sex, I never immediately knew if this was going to be something sexually satisfying for me. And don’t get me wrong I do like having you touch me and i really like you going down on me. and I like touching you and seeing you in your hot body suits. It’s just I miss things being more aggressive. I miss being dominated from time to time. and I miss having sex with a d and having someone try to turn me on like i have a d and stuff. Every 6-8 weeks it feels like I keep circling around the idea we aren’t sexually compatible and what if I was looking for someone else who can fulfill these wants I have.

- Me continuously feeling like we do not have the sexual compatibility I am looking for.

- You telling me you cheated on me 6 months ago.

- and Me confessing I violated your privacy and looked at your secret twitter.

I just feel like that is a lot to work through and it makes me wonder if just trying to find someone else is what needs to happen at this point. I hate to say it. I hate to break your heart. I really enjoy hanging out with you and talking to you almost everyday. You are one of my best friends and you are my main emotional support. It would be hard to lose you. but I’m not sure how much longer I can see a future in this relationship. I almost feel like you should move away and that would be best for you. You shouldn’t stay here for me. I am not confident in this relationship enough for you to be staying here just for me.

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