#all my family does is fucking mope around its fucking pathetic and I’m tired of it. they do not even try

[7vs8]

ok wait I actually might ….. ……🫣

#txt #all my family does is fucking mope around its fucking pathetic and I’m tired of it. they do not even try #all the do is vent to me. all my mom does is ducking complain to me. all my life this is all it’s been #on top of this I literally just cannot get anyone to like me. It’s like ny whole life I have been bending over backwards for other people #and I try so hard to match the energy of others and it just never works. I feel like everyone can automatically tell I am not enough #ppl keep saying “the right person will love you for who you are” #how is it possible that my entire life I have never gotten this. how is it possible I have never ever felt the love I give us reciprocated #I just feel like everyone is fucking with me constantly or they just want something out of me #no connection is very genuine #and everything sucks #and I need money to be happy but I can’t ever make enough money #and no one takes me seriously because I’m young #I am very tired and I hate having to control my body everyday

[cherry-kirsch]

why’d you gotta be talkative?

banjou/misora/kazumi || 4357 words || sfw || pre-poly / confessions

Banjou isn’t in love with Misora and Kazumi is going to prove him wrong.

[ AO3 ]

Banjou isn’t Misora’s boyfriend.

That’s fine.

They aren’t dating per say, they just haven’t given a name to kiss and tell they have between them. Banjou doesn’t want to give a promise, a commitment, to something that may not last as long as his first commitment did, and Misora is fine with that (he thinks), she agrees with him even. But, when all is said and done, he still cares for Misora and there is a small part of him that is overly protective of her, a part that years to call her his.

Kazumi utterly adores Misora.

And that’s fine.

Misora’s very cute and utterly irresistible, if a little scary, and Kazumi isn’t even fazed by her scowl and glare, no matter if it’s directed at him or not. Kazumi brings Misora gifts – well, more ‘trinkets’ than gifts – whenever they come back from wherever they’ve visited that day, and Misora takes them because that’s the polite thing to do; and Banjou always has the urge to go out and buy her whatever she’s been hankering after that week, whether it be a giant sheep plush or that cute skirt and blouse combo they’ve both had their eyes on for her.

Whenever Kazumi does something for Misora, Banjou wants to do something bigger for her. Every part of his mind screams at him to top whatever Kazumi did with something bigger, something better, something with more care and thought, with more lo—

No, not love. He’s not in love with her.

Banjou likes her like a crush, no matter how juvenile and pathetic that sounds. What business does he have, as a man, going around and crushing on someone? No matter how cute and amazing that someone is. In fact, now that he thinks about it, he isn’t sure what word to define his and Misora’s relationship. ‘Like’ and ‘Crush’ are too childish; ‘Infatuation’ is too serious; ‘Love’ is too extreme.

No, he’s not in love with her. He’s enamored—lost in the dizzying, giddying feeling of being so at peace and relaxed with someone whilst also being drunk on everything about them. Yes, ‘enamored’ works perfectly.

He should thank Sento for giving him that word, and he would now, if it wasn’t for the fact that he was waving his hand in front of Banjou’s face again, a scowl turning the corners of his lips downwards as Banjou looks right past him, glaring at the back of Kazumi’s head.

“You need to stop staring.” Sento tells him when Banjou tears his eyes away from Kazumi and turns back to whatever Sento’s trying to show him with a scowl. “If you’re really so mad about him being smitten with Misora, ask her to be your girlfriend. I promise you; she’ll be overjoyed.” Sento assures him with a roll of his eyes before he sits back down and begins to fiddle with his newest invention.

Banjou folds his arms across his chest. “Don’t fix what’s not broken.” He says and Sento peers at him from the corners of his eyes.

He points his screwdriver at Banjou. “Doesn’t mean it can’t be improved.”

“Trust me; me and Misora dating wouldn’t improve anything.” Banjou says, crouching down to rest his chin on the table. “It would just open up to a conversation that neither of us want to have and we’ll probably have a terrible, horrible breakup, and we won’t be able to look at each other.”

Sento blinks at Banjou slowly. “Are you stupid?” He asks him and Banjou frowns, his eyebrows furrowing.

“I’m sorry?” Banjou asks. “What?”

Sento sighs and rolls his eyes again. Banjou wishes he’d stop doing that, because Sento does that far too often for his liking. “You should really stop doing that.” Banjou says to him, because he’s nothing if not without a filter. “Ever heard what old ladies used to say? ‘Keep doing that and one day your eyes will get stuck like that.’”

Sento places down his screwdriver and rubs his temples. “Oh, I wait eagerly for that day.” He says dryly. “Look, are you content playing this convoluted game of cat and mouse with Misora until you die?”

Banjou blinks owlishly at him. “Die?” He repeats. “That’s a bit dramatic.”

“Every day as a Kamen Rider is a safety hazard.” Sento reminds him and, really, Banjou can’t fault that. “If you’re unhappy with something, change it. Otherwise you’ll just be miserable, and I’m so tired of you moping and sulking whenever Kazumi goes anywhere towards Misora with the intention of being all gooey and sappy with her.”

“I’m not sulking.” Banjou says with a frown, ignoring the way Sento looks at him. “And I’m not unhappy., Kazumi doesn’t annoy me and I’m fine with Misora accepting his stupid gifts and with him fawning over her.”

Sento purses his lips into a straight line and looks, for a moment, like he is about to say something, before he just sighs and dismisses Banjou with a wave of his hands. “Alright,” he says shortly. “You’re fine. While you’re here, make yourself useful and hand me that soldering tool.”

Banjou hands Sento the soldering tool and turns back to look at Misora at the same time her eyes lock with his. She smiles at him and gives him a small wave, and he waves back, a grim curling his lips.

Yeah. He’s fine.

* * *

How Banjou ended up here, with Kazumi, he didn’t quite know. Just like he didn’t quite know how one moment Sento was beside them, talking their ears off about practicing and raising their Hazard Levels before he took off somewhere into the distance without another word. He wonders how a man so loud and talkative can be so silent and secretive.

For a guy and a Rider, Kazumi’s good, Banjou has no bad blood fighting with him. As a friend, on the other hand, Banjou is violently neutral. He’s getting closer to ‘good’ in his books though; he bought Banjou a soda. And that’s where they were now, sitting on a bench in the middle of a ravaged street, drinking soda in a decidedly neutral silence. After all, what were they supposed to talk about? Silence was safer.

“So,” Kazumi begins, and Banjou looks up to see him looking down at his can. “Mii-tan.” He says.

Banjou immediately tenses up. “Her name is Misora.” He murmurs into his can.

Kazumi nods and they lapse back into silence.

“So,” Kazumi says again and Banjou has to scowl to stop his eye from twitching. “Misora.”

Banjou slams his can down onto the free space of bench between his legs and looks to Kazumi with a glare. “What about her?” He asks harshly. “What’s this about, huh? What exactly are you trying to do?”

Kazumi laughs, fucking laughs, and places his can on the ground at his feet, turning to Banjou with his hands held up in surrender. “I’m not trying to do anything, Banjou.” He assures and there’s something strange in the way that Kazumi says his family name. Banjou eyes his more carefully and lifts the can slowly to his lips “I’m just trying to find some common ground with you; you and Misora are… well… together aren’t you?”

Banjou chokes on his soda and spits it out onto the floor. “We… we’re not—we’re not together!” Banjou splutters loudly and Kazumi watches him in amusement. “We’re not dating!”

“But you are…” Kazumi trails off, giving Banjou a meaningful look while Banjou just looks at him blankly. “Y’know…” He trails off again, raising his eyebrows purposefully, trying desperately to get Banjou to catch on. He doesn’t. Kazumi sighs in exasperation. “Christ, Banjou. You’re sleeping with her, I mean."

Banjou chokes on the air, glaring at Kazumi when he chuckles, before straightening up. “Well, yes…” He says, trailing off quietly before he scowls at Kazumi. “What does that have to do with you?”

Kazumi shrugs. “Nothing,” he says before he smiles at Banjou. “You two are a cute couple.”

“We’re not a couple.” Banjou says. “We’re not dating, we’re just…”

“Sleeping together.” Kazumi add and Banjou nods, falling silent. “That’s a little casual for you.”

Banjou’s eyebrow twitches, a scowl slowly making its way on to his face. “What’s that supposed to mean?” Banjou asks through grit teeth, his free hand clenching into a fist. He has to stop himself from bursting his can.

Kazumi glances at him as he leans back on the bench, his elbow rest on the backboard. “Well you don’t do anything casually, do you? You didn’t box casually, you don’t do the Rider thing casually—I mean, it’s your job now.” Kazumi shrugs and looks away off into the sky, kicking his feet out. “Maybe it makes sense. It means you’re dedicated.”

Banjou snorts. “Of course I’m dedicated.” He says as he clasps his can with both hands, his fingers tapping the sides. “I don’t half-ass anything, and I don’t fuck around.” He says pointedly and with a smirk, Kazumi just smiles at him.

“I’m dedicated as well,” Kazumi says casually as Banjou peers at him. “I’m dedicated to my friends, to Hokuto, to Japan…” He trails off to eye Banjou. “To Misora and Mii-tan. To you and Sento. I fight for the things I’m dedicated to, so keep that in mind.”

For a moment, they eye each other, neither one wanting to be the one to look away first, in deathly silence. Banjou glares and Kazumi just smirks at him.

“Do you like her or something?” Banjou asks dryly. “I know you’re obsessed with Mii-tan, but Misora is entirely different to Mii-tan.”

“Of course I like her,” Kazumi says easily. “She’s cute and she could probably kill me if she wanted. She can defend herself, and she’s nice to talk to.”

Banjou snorts and Kazumi eyes him. “Liking someone is a little childish at your age, isn’t it?” He asks before he turns to Kazumi with a fake curious expression. “How old are you now? Forty? You’re double her age.”

Kazumi’s smirk curls downwards into a scowl, his eyes narrowing at Banjou. “I’m twenty-nine.” He growls and Banjou raises an eyebrow, whistling lowly.

“Getting on in age, are you, old man?” Banjou asks and Kazumi’s furious expression deepens.

“I’m six years older than you,” Kazumi snaps. “I’m hardly an old man. What are you, five? It seems like you are, since you’re acting like a petulant child.”

Banjou gives him a sickly-sweet smile laced with anger. “Cry about it.”

Kazumi stares at him for a moment before his eyes widen and he leans back, settling into the bench as he laughs lowly. “If that’s how it is, then so be it.” He says and Banjou doesn’t even glance at him. “It’s not like you’re her boyfriend, since you’re just sleeping together. I don’t have to get your opinion on this matter, it’s hers that matters.”

“Are you really going to do this?” Banjou says, spitting the words at Kazumi like poison. “Are you really going to woo her just to piss me off?”

“Well, now that you said it, yes!” Kazumi says with a triumphant smile, patting Banjou twice on the shoulder before he stands. “You said it yourself; you’re just sleeping with each other. It’s not like you’re going out or anything.”

Banjou growls and leaps to his feet, getting as close to Kazumi as he can manage, a stormy look on his face. “Is this a fucking game to you?” He asks.

Kazumi winks at him. “Try not to cry too hard when you lose.” He says, patting Banjou’s arm before he walks around him and back to Nascita.

Banjou squeezes the can in his hand so tight it explodes.

* * *

Banjou and Kazumi’s feud continues silently and scathingly, and with jabs and misplaced hands that leave punches in uncomfortable places, and with Sento sighing and rolling his eyes every time they scold or argue with each other.

Sento’s opinion of the feud is that it’s stupid, and, on some subconscious level, Banjou thinks so too. He doesn’t know what Kazumi thinks, and, honestly, he doesn’t want to; he’d rather not know what’s going on in Kazumi’s mind, he’s sure he’d find out something that he wouldn’t want to know. But Banjou hates losing, and he’d rather lose to Gentoku or Stalk before he ever lost to Kazumi. The thought of him losing to Kazumi makes him angry, and not because he’d be losing to Misora – she’s her own person, she’s not a prize – but because Kazumi could hold that over him for as long as they’re stuck in each other’s presence. And he’d rather turn into a Smash than have to look at Kazumi’s smug face.

Banjou is broken from his line of thought to Misora poking him in the cheek, and he glances down at her.

She looks beautiful like this, he thinks. Her hair is slightly ruffled and she looks adorably sleepy and small in his shirt, and she’s pouting up at him while she pokes at his cheeks, rubbing the top of her head against his bare shoulder.

“Why are you scowling?” Misora asks before she pouts, and Banjou smiles at the sight. “It wasn’t bad, was it?”

Banjou chuckles at that and catches her hand in his own, lifting it gently to his lips so he could kiss her fingertips. “No,” he says softly. “It wasn’t bad. It was great as always.”

“Then why were you scowling?” Misora asks him.

Banjou cups her face in his hands and leans down to press a lingering kiss to the top of her head. “Don’t worry about it.” He tells her gently as he pushes stray strands of her hair back from her face. “It’s just stupid Rider stuff. Worrying about Sento.”

Misora snorts, leaning into Banjou’s touch. “When don’t you worry about him.” She says.

“Exactly.” Banjou replies. “It’s nothing.”

“I’m glad that it’s just that.” Misora says softly as she settles down to rest her head on Banjou’s chest. “I thought you were mad at Kazumin still.”

Banjou snorts as he begins to stroke Misora’s hair, allowing his finger to comb through it. “You call him Kazumin now? That sounds so stupid.”

Misora shrugs. “He told me to.” She says before she peers up at Banjou with a small, teasing smile. “Besides, it’s just as bad as Mii-tan, don’t you think?”

Banjou does, and shakes his head. “No.” He says. “You’re cuter. Yours doesn’t matter as much.” He tells her, moving his hands to squish her cheeks, chuckling when she pouts and smacks his hands away.

“Don’t be mean!” Misora scolds, furrowing her brows in an exaggerated grumpy look.

“Or what?” Banjou asks, grinning.

Misora sits up and crosses her arms across her chest and Banjou almost has a heart attack, wondering how one person could be so damned cute at every opportunity. He wants to take her frustration seriously, he really does, but she just looks too cute pouting at him like that in his shirt.

“Or…” Misora begins, trailing off to think before she grins at him. “Or I won’t give you any more kisses.”

Banjou gasps and lays a hand over his heart, leaning closer to clasp her hand in his. “What a cruel punishment!” He says dramatically, an exaggerated look of desperation on his face. “Please, sweetheart, darling, won’t you forgive me?”

Misora looks at him and flutters her eyelashes. “Oh, I don’t know.” She sighs dramatically.

“Love,” He says. “Please? Come on, Princess.”

The final nickname makes Misora melt and she grins widely before she throws her arms around Banjou’s neck and pulls herself onto his neck as he peppers her face in kisses. She giggles as he does so.

“I guess you’re forgiven.” She tells him as she presses a hand over her mouth, trying to stifle her laughter.

Banjou grins up at her. “I’ll never hurt you again, princess.”

They hear a loud sigh from the other side of the room and they look to see Sento standing up, a tired look on his face. He turns to them. “Please,” he says. “Just date already.” The words make Banjou roll his eyes and Misora go pink.

“Leave if it’s too much for you.” Banjou tells him with a smirk and Sento raises an eyebrow.

“I’m going to find Kazumi,” he says, his eyes darting between them. “Next time go have sex somewhere else.”

Banjou flips Sento the middle finger as he walks the spiral staircase and disappears into the ceiling. Misora giggles and collapses into bed, splaying herself out like a starfish and giggling further when Banjou tickles her to get her to move over. She moves and rests her head back on Banjou’s chest when he settles back down comfortably, making a small noise of sleepy protest when Banjou grabs up her phone.

He grins when he sees the lock screen. “Aw, ‘Sora, I didn’t know you liked my face that much.” He teases, flashing the selfie of him that Misora had set as her background.

“You have a stupid face.” She grumbles into him.

“A handsome stupid face.” Banjou corrects with a smile.

Misora makes a half-hearted noise of disgruntlement. “Whatever,” She says. “Just don’t mess with my Neko Atsume.”

Banjou smiles down at her and strokes her hair. “I won’t,” he assures her, though he knows she’s already falling asleep for both exhaustion and the soothing motions that Banjou’s using to pet her head. “You just sleep.”

Misora easily settles down beside him and is asleep in minutes, her body a warm weight against his, and he looks down at her fondly for a minute, pressing a kiss to her forehead as he smiles proudly, flicking through her Snapchat friends to answer messages. Most of them were just several online friends that liked the same things that Misora did and they often chatted back and forth, Banjou pointedly ignores the ones with English names and scrolls to the bottom of her friend’s list, his eyes narrowing as he spots the username—KazuminS.

Banjou was about to put her phone down entirely and go back to cuddling Misora, his thumb hovering over the on button, before he stops and allows a mischievous grin to stretch across his lips.  He double taps the name and the camera opens to the image of his chin. He pulls the phone back until the screen shows his shit-eating grin, and a sleeping Misora on his shirtless chest, and he taps the capture button on the screen with his thumb.

It takes him less than two seconds to type the caption before he sends it off and places Misora’s phone on the bedside table before he wraps his arms around her, buries his chin in her hair and closes his eyes.

* * *

Kazumi is eating M&M’s with Sento when his phone buzzes.

He shoves the M&M packet into Sento’s hands and digs into his pocket to retrieve his phone, a small smile crossing his lips when he sees a Snapchat notification from Misora. He unlocks his phone and taps to view the notification, tapping on Misora’s name when it pops up next to a red square.

Out of the things he expected to see when he clicked on her name, he did not expect to see Misora asleep on Banjou’s chest (was that his shirt that she was wearing?) while Banjou wore a fucking annoying grin. He blinks down at the image until it disappears, the caption etched into the back of his mind.

I’m winning, Kazumi. Can you say the same? ;)

* * *

“Are you two ever going to give it a bloody rest?” Sento asks in exasperation.

Banjou and Kazumi look up from their place in the middle of the basement, where Banjou has managed to wrangle Kazumi into a headlock. They exchange a look and then look back to Sento with a straight face. Sento takes one look between them, sighs and turns back to his workbench.

“This is important, Sento,” Kazumi says seriously and Sento sighs harder.

Banjou nods in agreement. “I’m not going to lose to an old man.”

“You two are behaving like children,” Sento scolds firmly. “You are wrestling in my basement and if you continue to do so, I’m going to kick you both out. So, Banjou, let go of Kazumi.” Reluctantly, Banjou releases Kazumi from his grip and Sento lets out a relieved breath. “Thank you.”

Banjou glares at Kazumi. “Old man.” He mouths.

Kazumi flips him off. “Dumbass.” He mouths back.

Sento points between them and they both freeze. “Can one of you get me the tiny wrench that only fits in the bolts with the hole in it?” He asks and Banjou sighs as he turns in the direction that Sento is pointing.

“What?” Banjou asks as he reaches the table.

“The thingy that secures the socket screw!” Sento calls back. “The hex-key or whatever!”

Kazumi blinks at him. “You mean an Allen wrench?” He asks.

Sento frowns at him as Banjou seizes up the Allen wrench and heads over to Sento. “Probably,” he says to Kazumi, only to grin up at Banjou when he hands him the wrench. “Exactly! Thank you, Banjou; you’re useful after all.”

Kazumi looks between Sento and the wrench. “And you’re meant to be a genius.” He hums thoughtfully.

“Physicist, Kazumi,” Sento corrects, jabbing the wrench in Kazumi’s direction. “Genius Physicist.”

Banjou winces, laying a hand over his heart. “Ouch, that hurt, Sento.”

“What am I?” Kazumi asks with a frown. “Chopped liver?”

Banjou glances at him. “Yes.” He says seriously and Kazumi scowls at him.

“Stop bickering.” Sento tells them before he turns around with a bored expression. “What are you even arguing over? Does it really matter?”

“Of course it matters,” Banjou says with a scowl, jabbing a finger in Kazumi’s direction. “He wants to be a fucking snake and woo Misora just to piss me off, and then rub it in my face if I lose.”

Kazumi just snorts. “You’re just sleeping together.” He says.

Banjou practically bristles at his words. “Not the fucking point!”

Sento looks between them, several emotions flashing across his face in half a second. “Then… what is the point?” He asks and both Banjou and Kazumi groan in frustration at him. Sento blinks a few times and holds his hands up in surrender. “I’m sorry, am I missing something here?” He asks as he looks between them.

Kazumi lays his hand over his heart and looks dramatically off into the distance, Banjou groans and smacks his forehead while Sento stares at him. “You see, Sento!” Kazumi declares loudly as Banjou starts to mimicking him patronizingly. “My soul fire is burning passionately for Misora!”

Banjou rolls his eyes. “You keep saying that—What does that even fucking mean?!” He cries in frustration.

Kazumi gives Banjou a look that one would give to a small child who didn’t understand and pats his head. “Oh, Banjou,” He says with a wistful sigh. “It means that I’m love with Misora.”

“You can’t be in love with Misora because I’m in love with Misora!” Banjou yells, gesturing vigorously to himself, unable to stop the words before they fall from his lips.

The room lapses into uncomfortable silence and while Banjou looks like someone just died in front of him, Kazumi grins on brightly, seemingly pleased with Banjou’s revelation as Sento looks on, unamused.

“Banjou…” A familiar female voice comes and Banjou’s blood runs cold. “You love me?” Slowly, he turns to meet Misora’s surprised gaze and stays stock still as she approaches him slowly, taking his hands in her own. “Do you mean it?” She asks.

Banjou swallows hard, his heart thundering loudly in his chest. “Yes.” He says, and he’s more sure than he’s felt in a while. “I do mean it. I love you, Misora. So, do me a favor and become my girlfriend.”

Misora laughs at his bluntness but leans up to press her forehead against his. “It’s about time, you idiot.” She says with a small smile. “I’ve been in love with you for months. It took you long enough.”

Kazumi throws his hands into the air and looks up the ceiling. “Fucking finally!” He exclaims. Misora peers at him curiously while Banjou frowns. “It’s about fucking time!”

Sento looks between the four of them, thoroughly confused. “Can someone please explain what’s going on?”

“I’m sorry,” Banjou says, staring defiantly at Kazumi. “What the fuck?”

“The entire reason I’ve been pissing you off for the last two weeks is so that you’d confess to Misora.” Kazumi says with a roll of his eyes. “I figured getting you angry was the quickest way to get you to blurt it out to her, or in front of her. And, hey, it worked.”

Banjou blinks at him. “But I thought…” He begins, trailing off into silence as Kazumi laughs.

“I do like Misora,” Kazumi says with a grin. “But you were idiotic enough to believe that you’d stand a chance if I was trying to woo her. Either way, it worked, so now you two can get back to doing…” He looks between them. “Well, each other I guess.” Banjou splutters as Misora flushes red, giving Kazumi a half-hearted scowl as he smirks between them both and claps Banjou on the back.

“Hey,” Banjou says suddenly and Kazumi looks up at him. “Thanks.”

Kazumi smiles at him and pats his shoulder. “No problem.” He says. “And, for the record, I like you too Banjou."

Misora giggles into her hand as Banjou blinks blankly at him. “When was that ever on the table?” He asks breathlessly and Misora grins.

“It could be,” She says, and his eyes snap to hers as she smiles up at him. “What do you say? I don’t mind sharing if you don’t either.”

For a moment, the words swirl around his head, not registering until they click into place like the final piece of an intricate puzzle. Banjou’s eyes widen as he looks between Kazumi and Misora, a smile starting to curve his lips.

Oh.

Oh, he thinks. This may just be something very great.

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