#and everybody keeps telling me to just *focus* and to just *reward myself when im done* and its like dude i really fucking cant

[kiliantharker]

god i hate this fucking geology class

#harker.txt #i just. god i cannot fucking do textbook lecture only based classes #and im kind of worried now because i really fucked up an essay in ANOTHER textbook lecture based class and now thats at a C and this one is #at a D and i dont want my gpa to drop super badlyyy but god i cannot bring myself #to actually focus and give a flying fuck about this class #and everybody keeps telling me to just *focus* and to just *reward myself when im done* and its like dude i really fucking cant #this is not interesting the professor gives the most boring hour long lectures that make me want to bash my head in #and since its an online class im not actually physically forced to be there and to pay attention so im just Not Doing It #ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh #i just want this semester to be over and god i regret not dropping these two goddamn fucking classes i shouldve taken the L and lost 500$

[survivekohsai]

Episode 3 - These Little Binches Keep Going To Exile And Mutinying!!!!!!!! ~ Richie

I am legit FUCKING PISSED!!! I LOST TWO ALLIES THAT WERE GOOD FOR MY GAME. 4 PEOPLE DID TYLER, I GOT LIED TOO BY A MAJORITY OF THEM!!!! BECAUSE JACKSON SAID 5 (ME, himself, Linus, Mo and QUILL) but Kelsey said so as well so which is 6. SO SOMEONE IS FUCKING LYING TO ME!!! AND I AM LEGIT PISSED OFF TO THE EXTENT IF THESE BITCHES WANNA PLAY CUTTHROAT ILL CUTTHROAT BACK NOW 

I am so alone in this game.... like FOR REALS! I can't trust anyone in this game! Like everyone is a liar and a backstabber.... like can't anyone tell me the truth for once!!!! I put my trust and people used that against me! I am cutting the loose ends and going ham on challenges now. I DARE THE OTHER TRIBE TO PICK TYLER AGAIN I DARE THEM!!!

I'm so pissed and sad.. like why can't anything go the way it is planned! I just really want this game to be fucking over give Tyler his unanimous win you stupid premade bitches. 

There's simply too much to talk about! Again i single handedly took someone out!! I really liked Mo, it's a shame he came at me in the main chat that was his downfall... dont come for me :D Now i asked why i was voted for and Mr Jackson came at me calling me bitter and personally attacking my which was fun. I could only laugh because i wasnt bitter i think he was just upset that he is an absolute failure and failed to get me out twice in a row :( Also apparently i make the tribe chat 'insufferable' which is soooo unfortunate. :D

That tribal was ugly. Mo leaving is not a cute concept and Tyler finding an idol on exile was like... wow. However, not my tribe, not my problem. Right now I want to focus on winning the reward again. I want to send myself to exile as a sort of retribution for RTP. Maybe it'll work, maybe it won't. I know that with my idol, however, I will get through a tribal. Plus, the puzzle is a mood and I think we'll get a good time on it.

forgot to mention this but jordan mutinying is so iconic lol. idk why he did it but i love the drama. what i dont love however is tyler idoling out mo. i wanted to work with mo come swap or merge but now i cant. also raf's dislike of tyler enabled him to go to exile twice where he found the idol so thats annoying. also i think theres tension between raf and rtp/ry so idk whats that about. so far i like working with richie, raf, trixie kind of but she seems cracked, and rtp. but idk if thats a group that could actually come together. i wont have to worry about it until we lose a challenge i guess tho!

Good golly, Miss Molly. Everybody makes choices...and people have CHOSEN. So going into the tribal, I had my heart set on voting Linus. In the case that three million people played idols again, if I threw my vote, I didn't have to play my own, therefore keeping myself in another day. But, I then paid attention to a chat consisting of Tyler, Isaac and Linus. Tyler wanted to vote for Mo and mentally I was thinking "LOL no you bottom bye" because I really didn't want to be taking such a strong side, especially one so brittle as Tyler's. Not to mention Jordan, who I thought would be my automatic lover, has definitely NOT contacted me about much in this game and it made me shifty. However...I got to thinking. I thought to myself, "Kelsey, who are you?" And the answer was "I am Kelsey Valentana Mikaelson, I'm a cutthroat queen who slashes throats and wears ugg boots." And I realized that if I indeed voted for Linus and didn't take a side, I'd be right up there with the people who always vote me out just for being an "easy vote." That's when I said to myself "Ok Kelsey...screw it, you want Tyler in this game, do something about it." I decided then that hey, even if I vote in minority, girl, does anyone REALLY expect anything different out of a controversial gal like me~? So I changed my vote. About...one minute before deadline, but still, I DID IT and I decided to have no regrets. And then....the GAG. First of all, Tyler apparently told no one, not even Jordan, that he had an idol which I don't believe. But then...Mo goes home...! It was really tragic as well, cause I had JUST told Mo he's not going anywhere. But regardless; the vote is revealed that someone voted Linus. I immediately know it's me. However...following Mo's elimination, it opens up a door. Jackson and Tyler are OBVIOUSLY warring sides now. Both of them are boiling hot personalities and it's oil vs water, gurl, it's split the tribe in two. I've told Jackson's side I was the vote for Linus to avoid an idol massacre. And that's true, I did vote Linus and the hosts can confirm. However, I can also tell Tyler's side that I voted for Mo without knowing about the idol, showing I'm willing to take that leap of faith for them. And if they ask the hosts, that is also true. This has given me the opportunity to be a swing vote for BOTH sides and...if I so wanted...I think that really choose who goes next? It's kinda weird to think that I have like...power, cause it NEVER HAPPENS LOL but...I'm just going to plug ALL my effort into this next challenge. The longer I stay in this position without having to make a move, the better. I just really really really REALLY hope it stays this swell forever! And...no one realizes what happened X'D And THAT'S all there is to it~! Vamos, bailar! -Kelsey V Mikaelson

i wanna die just a lil bit

im mutinying!!!!!! *janelle voice* bye bye bitches!!!

okay so! im back in the game FOLKS. on my old tribe im leaving behind Chelsea and RTP who although I wanted to work with them I was way too inactive... oh well. That Rafael guy was sweet. But on exile I got to seriously bond with Akito. I helped her with the puzzles (even though the reward is already gone since Tyler got it, and all i got to know is that THEY DON'T REPLACE IT). But I get an ally! finally! And she's telling me all this stuff about her tribe and how Tyler and Jordan M are beefing people. blah blah. I didn't really follow or understand what the dynmaics are like there. But I can tell Quillynn and Jackson that Chelsea and I worked well together and maybe work with them. Akito said that they're together. And Kelsey is in the middle? Since I'm mutiny'ing I can use this as a fresh start! Maybe I won't have to use my idol the first tribal I go to. But I probably should lol. The second I get to this new tribe (even if we lose which we probably will) I'm gonna go 100% social.

hi im dumb i dont know what the challenge is but i will go look and do that! furby out~~~

I dislike Casanova. I hate that game too much to even try and attempt, but eh. This tribe needs some clipping tbqh.

do people like know others on the other tribe and feel confident or something. why mutiny off the winning tribe idgi. But go us!! Regan and richie are good at everything i want t align with them!

We stan Regan!

my entire tribe needs to realize that Im the most iconic person here and people leave because they hate me like anyone who knows me hates me. I can be annoying. ryan and jordan both left because Im annoying-

I'm going to get out all the people who decided it would be smart it mutiny.

I HATE THIS TRIBEEEEEE LIKE CAN WE WIN A GAME FOR ONCE IN OUR LIFE TIME?!?!?! AND CAN TRIBES SPLIT AT 5 v 5 v 5 please?!?!?!?

I hate that this tribe can't win anything but it's better than being told what to do by regan and trixie. God if I had to deal with them for one more round I was gonna scream into the void and never come out of it.

Sorry for being such a lame duck in this game hostos

Hi I'm Jackson and this is my third confessional. Obviously the elephant in the room is my fight with Tyler, he's kind of arrogant and obnoxious so I don't really regret it. I still want him out and even though I told him we're voting Isaac I still think he has to go this time since he couldn't possibly have another (if I go home cause of that tho I'll be glad, fuck idols) But anyway I'm kinda high and I don't have much to say, we lost the challenge because we suck, no I actually don't care about challenge strength, yes I am okay continuing to lose The alliance of me, Kelsey, Quillynn, Linus and Akito will hopefully stand together even though we're back to being a tribe of 9 (Ryan is here wtf he prob doesn't trust me I tried to vote him out a million times in Kvaloya) Ok bye I hate this

we won again :D but these little binches keep going to exile and mutinying!!!!!!!! i don’t get it….. like okay yeah this tribe is probably terrible or maybe its just me because its like day…..10 and i still haven’t had a single conversation with anyone on this tribe but we haven’t lost a single challenge either reward or immunity yet so like I’m cool with being on this tribe…. what annoys me is that now we’re down in numbers despite winning everything????? RUDE

so this game has been pretty quiet for me...people keep mutinying from my tribe but we keep winning....ryan and jordan are dumb huh....otherwise no one talks to me at all..im hoping to just be the crummudgeony gramps this season

Voting Confessionals

Well I'm switching my vote to Tyler but this is gonna be a bad time since im predicting another idol use on tyler.

I wanted it to be Jackson but since Linus asked I'm voting for him

I vote for Jackson because I just want to help get him away from the constant suffering of listening to people in the main chat.

I vote tyler I guess

Voting for tyler again!

Okay nvm since idk where linus or kelsey are I'll vote tyler

Tyler voted out 4-2-1-1-1

Quillynn, Jackson, Linus, Akito voted Tyler

Jordan, Isaac voted Linus

Ryan voted Isaac

Tyler voted Jackson

Kelsey voted for herself!

#confessionals #worthplayingfor

[survivorbahamas]

EPISODE THREE: “I AM BRIAN HEIDEK” - BRIAN

idk whats happening int his game i was gone for one night and now im on a different tribe with ppl i dont know so this is gonna be fun

You last time I made a confessional, I was pissing myself off at the crazy bat shit Willa has said about our lovely Ysabela tribe. Well look at that. Just take a good look. Maybe snap a picture cause they last longer, but we still managed to scrape elimination and were still 6 strong at Final 14. Its hilarious when people have to eat their words.

Okay wyd? A swap already? At 15? This had to be planned to make us bond with our new tribes and everything. I thought I had to be done being peppy and preppy on Day 1, maybe on Day 19 to the new people you haven't seen at all prior to the merge. But on Day 9? This better play to our pretty faces. I don't want to go to my first tribal council and be the first one out via swap and be swap fucked yet again. #HeresToHoping

This tribe swap is not good for me at all considering the only person I know is Brian. Which means I have to make even more relationships

I'm really content with my new tribe swap because I've got Rob, I've got Julia Rae, I think I have a bond with Brian forming right now. I rely on pregame relationships so much at the moment and while that will make any stellar performance less impressive, at least I'm trying to learn from my mistakes. I want to play UTR but I don't know how believable that will be for everyone else... maybe I need to actually be over the top like usual? But then doesn't that set me up for a quick blindside??? I dunno! All I know is that Mitch and Chris and Zach need to go sooner rather than later. I gotta see to it that they are out of this game.

IS. THERE. ANYTHING. BETTER. THAN. BEING. SWAPPED. ALONE. Ya, there fucking is...literally everything. You couldn't give me Bodhi? I couldn't even get Rob?  Maybe I can have the other half of the super idol as a reward for this GARBAGE? I'm here alone and idk anybody so I am going to LEVERAGE THIS SITUATION AND PLAY LIKE THE TRU QUEEN I CAN BE. I'm going to be tryin moves these people couldn't even conceive of honestly. I have nothin to lose. nuYsabela tribe is four original Cigateos and three original Eleutheras. Honestly, there are worse positions to be in because these majority groups will be vying for control, and maybe i'll just be forgotten about for a lil and I can exploit that to make my moves. Hopefully these tribes aren't that close and some of their members were inactive --as most of original Ysabela was. If they weren't, hopefully people are looking to work with me since i can really sway things in a vote on this tribe. Original Cigateo: Gage, Mitch, Jenna, Zach - I've talked to Gage and Mitch a little bit so far. I need to look into Mitch a little bit. I've seen him around before, and i'm certain a lot of people know him. Also Jaiden just called Mitch out for being the most threatening on my tribe, so maybe I can use that and his past relationships against him? But i'm not doubting that since I've heard of him, he must have some real talent in these games. Also it's never bad to have a bigger threat than yourself around in this game, so i'm going to focus on developing this relationship more tomorrow. I've also heard Gage's name before, so i'm going to look him up too. Im going to put my clutch research skills to the test on this one. Time to make moves, ya know? Original Eleuthera: Nick, Willa, Lily- Talked to all three a little. Willa made their tribe bonds look really weak, and if that's true, amazing. I'd rather get some of these Eleutheras out of here personally so that original Ysabela and their dysfunctional asses have a better chance at numbers later in the game. But I also don't want to get picked off by original Cigateo  if I work to deplete original Eleuthera. Don't get it twisted, I want original Ysabela to have numbers because, with the exception of Bodhi and Chris, it was full of players I believe to have very little self-awareness, meaning I could manipulate them and hopefully get further in the game. Threats need to go, and the sheeple of original Ysabela are the ones I need to get to the end. Finally, I still have half the super idol/ it can be a regular idol if I need. This gives me some power, but I still don't plan on telling anybody. ldol tea only comes out to play if it can change the course of the game in a significant way. I have a clue to another idol on Ysabela too, which is nice because being the only original Ysabela tribe member left here means I should be the only one with this information. Maybe I could use it to gain some favor with a new ally? But i want to keep it to myself for another round because I think I could potentially find it faster and with more certainty alone. But also, i'm tryin not to get too cocky, paranoid, or set on either UTR or OTT gameplay in this season. I want to be flexible... so everything could change as soon as tomorrow!

Ho Ly Shit. We fucking swapped. I figured we'd wait just a little longer, but nope!! It's all about the TWISTS. Icky. In my view, a tribe should exist for more than just 2 challenges, so that it actually feels like a tribe rather than a temporary group. But whatever, I don't mind all that much. I'm glad to be on this new tribe, because I don't really like anyone from my old tribe except for Dana. Fortunately, due to this swap, no one will see myself and Dana as a pair, and I'll be able to get some of my old tribe picked off ideally. I've started my conversing, and I like Zachary. I want to work with Chris, but it also might be in my best interest to get him voted out. I don't want too many allies on the same sides, because that makes me a threat. I want an ally or two in each alliance, and hopefully that'll be enough to bring me to the end. My loyalty is completely with Dana, but I need a backup plan should she be voted out. My goal on this tribe is to form another alliance that will allow me to be on the right side of the merge vote at the very least. I'm here to win, and I intend to follow through with this goal. Perhaps it will work out, perhaps it wont, but I'm planning on playing the best game that I can this season. I don't really know what this challenge is, I'll just trust everyone else to try hard enough and make me win. I'll try to contribute, but winning challenges is the first step to losing the game.

The thing I love about swaps is that you get to meet new people and really form those newer bonds that didn't exist with the old tribal lines. But the thing is with my case. 5/6 of my old tribe is on Citageo 2.0 and we got Brian and Rob in place if Dana. Like wtf? I love my tribemates, but I'm at a disadvantage here if Rob and Brian can rekindle whatever relationships they have personally with my more known Tumblr tribemates. So I need this immunity win, and I really need to avoid tribal council at all costs.

Oh hey I just realized that 5/8 people on my new tribe are from original Ysabela. That sounds like a good thing, right? WRONG. If us 5 make it to the merge unhurt, then we're VERY easy targets. If the other tribe loses immunity, they might feel inclined to vote out Dana first, which is awful for me. I care about Dana more than the rest of my tribe combined, so I have nothing against flipping on Ysabela to make our numbers less threatening. I'll need one more person to help me do it, but I think it could work out. If I save these 3's asses, they're going to open up to me a bit more, and while I don't expect them to feel indebted to me, I do expect them to at least want to work with me more going forward. I don't like Jaiden or Adrian all that much anyway, so creating some lies about how they're sneaky and trying to lead the tribe should be easy as hell. I plan on contributing to this challenge just enough to make people not turn on me, but not enough to win. Dana will be going home if Nu Cigaretto or whatever the fuck we're called wins immunity. I hate big moves for big moves sake, but this might be an exception to the "big moves are for idiots" rule that I tend to play by. I'm getting in good with Zachary and Kai, and I'm trying to make Chris more inclined to work with me. Hopefully this shit will work out.

So I just realized that a good majority of this cast played in Big Brother Glenn or had a large part in it. Nicholas being a host, Jenna, Jaiden and Zach playing with me. Oh I can't wait to send them all to fucking tribal so they can be booted off one by one for the cumulative 23 votes I received. Actually, I hope they make the merge so I can personally send them home.  

Honestly why is everyone gettin on my nerves today. First of all, I try to talk strategy with Lily, and get this: On 5/26/17, at 12:44 PM, Lily Douma wrote: > I'm not ready to think about it. Honestly. Haha let's forget about it. Or just win this thing. We can still win. UM WHAT? You think you're going to avoid talking strategy with me by just telling me you aren't in the mood? COME ON. Honestly that's not workin for me. Despite that, I still like her the most of anyone on my tribe. and then... On 5/26/17, at 1:07 PM, Lily Douma wrote: > Yeah that's super strange. I hope we win but even if we don't I hope you stick around. On 5/26/17, at 1:27 PM, Lily Douma wrote: > Thank you!!! You are too kind! I'm just a Chatty Cathy hahaha. But you are pretty easy to talk to and actually respond with more than two words which is amazing. UM HELLO? I will be sticking around, know that. Also I'm just like generally annoyed by Jenna's presence? Like idk her yet, but I just have this gut feeling we aren't going to click based on tribe/ immunity chat and that sucks. Also i'm going to need people to step it up in immunity. thx.

Highkey I like to write quality entries, but since this is to earn points for the challenge I'm going to not. Anyway, we had a tribe swap and so far I like pretty much everybody who has spoken to me. I sort of feel that there are people I haven't reached out to yet and that's my next objective on top of winning immunity.

So I know that Willa has an idol but we need to find the other side. Nicholas is also interested in working with Willa so I'm excited about that. Hopefully we can all make it to merge!

I miss kai on my tribe tho. I tell him everything. So it's hard to not talk about the idol because I really want to. I kinda hope my tribe loses so I don't have to worry about him getting voted out.

Jk. I love kai but I'm not ready to go home or get lost in this game. I'm super worried I won't find my way back. I can't afford to get lost in the Bermuda Triangle man. I ain't strong enough.

I decided to send myself ~away~ because this means that I might have an additional opportunity to find any advantages. My tribe is already five people strong from original Ysabela, so I'm not worried about being on the bottom of the numbers or anything, which means that I have literally nothing to worry about. I still want to work with Rob and Julia Rae though because they're honestly my closest allies and I rely on them A TON right now.

So our tribe is floundering at the moment, which isn't surprising. I wish I could do more to help out, but I just have no energy whatsoever. I'm not fast enough to think of survivor players to compare hosts to or write a 500 word essay.

Hello world. Already did a confessional today, but here is one for some points in Tasks. It isnt lookin too hot for my tribe right now tbh. But it's fine. I really like Lily and I'm ready to mix shit up. Also why is everyone bothering me. Like pls help me.

this is three sentences. nothing has really happened lately! this challenge is pretty hard but that's because i'm busy. i hope my tribe doesn't decide to vote me out :(

This game is just crazy. Between the other nights random spontaneous tribal, the also random tribe swap after 2 people and the magical idol board I've just discovered I'm confused as to what I'm even doing... to be fair as long as we win this immunity challenge and the rest, I won't complain. Let's just hope we don't get any more twists thrown at us any time soon because I don't think I'm ready for another one just yet..

Jaiden can choke. Brian is dumb. Kai is cool. Julia who? Bodhi whomst? Chips is cool.

Good time to actually send a confessional lmao. Anyways, a 4-3-1 swap is awkward being in the 3 because Dana could easily just flip, but hopefully we can convince her to stay close and for Zach to flip on the Cigs so that we can take control. If all else fails I just hope I use my idol correctly if I need to. Myself Lily and Nicholas could be in a great spot if we play this right, and then if we can realign with Kai and Brian we might just be ~unstoppable~ at the merge. Not that a boring pagonging is gonna be allowed by any one of us crazy losers.

OK OK OK (now ladies) So I've been talking to Chris about this new tribe, trying to plant the seeds of flippage. He has brought up that Julia and Jaiden are a pair, and I said that I think ADRIAN IS PART OF A TIGHT THREESOME WITH THEM. I'm trying to make Chris want to be a close ally of mine, and want to flip to join Kai/Brian/Rob and take out one of our old tribe members. I want to win this game, and making dumb big moves might unfortunately be in my best interest.

"Someone type gimmie in chat to get an individual advantage and go to tribal" So I go to tribe chat to type gimmie, even though I don't want any advantage, just because I want Dana to win immunity BUT SOMEONE ELSE GOT IT FIRST BUT THANK GOD ----- IT WAS ON MY TRIBE

http://vignette3.wikia.nocookie.net/survivor/images/2/23/Parvati_with_2_idols.jpg/revision/latest?cb=20120114024916 Who would've thought that little ol' me would be in the possession of my two least favorite powers in Tumblr Survivor history? I have not only a Sapphire idol, but now I have a CHAOS idol... and I don't think anyone is much the wiser! *Sarah voice* I'm playing like a criminal. I threw the challenge and RIGHT before I left, I told Rob and Julia that it was Bodhi because he wasn't speaking UNTIL the challenge had ended, almost right after it was announced that we had lost. I hope that little seed EXPLODES in their heads and they gun for him to go, and he won't even know what hit him! Although I'd prefer Chris take the boot, Bodhi will have to do for now. Sorry, bro! Along my personal advantaggedon, I have this cool little thing that forces the person of your choosing to take a self vote. I like this because it could help me out in the future with one of my idols being as effective as possible. For everything to go smoothly though, I really need to make sure that I'm set to make the merge without attending a SINGLE tribal council between now and then. I can't have an excuse to waste these things until that time comes, but with that being said I also need to make sure I'm in a good enough position to not *have* to use them in any period of time. Fingers crossed!

I love that we're in the lead. Chris, Brian and Rob are challenge beasts with this. Jaiden and I are like participating with the conversations and like boosting morale for Cigateo, while Julia, Kai and Bodhi haven't made a single appearance. And we're still winning because of those three. Huh who knew that Brian and Rob are really working to get immunity cause I guess their afraid of being eliminated premerge? Idk, cause there are 5 people from Ysabela 1.0 here on this swapped tribe and I guess that they are scared idk. I mean, both men are really really sweet people, and it would suck to see any of them leave before my og tribe. but hey what can you do?

And of course one of these selfish people had to sacrifice everything we had for an advantage that was probably not really worth it. Like was it a clue to the idol? to a legacy advantage? to a double vote? who knows? I'm just pissed that I have to vote someone off because I was really looking forward to taking the weekend off and like get to know my new tribemates more. But now, I have to press for someone's name and that's something I don't want to do?

Ok so no one was talking to me about the vote at first. Then Chris told me that he'd heard my name because PEOPLE THINK I'VE BEEN THROWING CHALLENGES????? Ok well I am but that's besides the point. Chris then said he threw out Julia, and after some more waiting, Adrian told me he'd heard both my name and Julia's. BIG IF TRUE. He also said he's not gonna be voting me. Hey, that's perfect. I don't want to go home without my fictional million dollars, and I won't take 16th place for an answer. Rob has also told me he's voting Julia

Well not only we forfeited the lead to this challenge, people are targeting to breakup the Ysabela 5? Is that some alliance I wasn't notified about? Just because we have the majority on this new tribe and that we happened to play the first 6 days of this game together? I know that people are on the outs trying to find a way in- but that is the shittiest reason to target people because of some rat that threw the lead. Like, that is really really pathetic, and I can't deal with ridiculous that sounds. Well if it does go through, I just hope I don't get the boot cause going home third would really really suck.

Well not only we forfeited the lead to this challenge, people are targeting to breakup the Ysabela 5? Is that some alliance I wasn't notified about? Just because we have the majority on this new tribe and that we happened to play the first 6 days of this game together? I know that people are on the outs trying to find a way in- but that is the shittiest reason to target people because of some rat that threw the lead. Like, that is really really pathetic, and I can't deal with ridiculous that sounds. Well if it does go through, I just hope I don't get the boot cause going home third would really really suck.

Lol Jaiden. I don't know about him. We have this bond with Hoenn, and I was counting on him not being present for tribal council, but lo and behold- he's back. I should be relieved but I don't think that it was smart of him to be "back". Like if you're given the chance to escape tribal council and not vote/not get votes for, I would take it the first chance I can. But here he is saying that "I don't like doing nothing for an extended period of time." ............. I- BITCH! YOU DON'T DO ANYTHING IN THE FIRST PLACE... PERIOD! This game irritates me and I won't stand for it. I can wait for a given chance to go ham in this game.

me: here's a good strategic idea! also me: jk let's use my powers for teh lolz! I think I'm gonna play my sapphire idol tonight to make some big moves. Actually, just one big move. I'm going to send Chris's ugly ass to the prejury home of losers... all because he's coming for my actual mother, Julia Rae. We'll see how this goes! That's all for now because I have NO IDEA WHAT IM DOING

I am screwed. I'm the only cigarette left on Cigarette. Fuck! And I was starting to really like Gage too but I called it! I told him we're swapping cause an instant was sketchy for round two. On my tribe there's Jaiden, Brian, Adrian, Bodhi, Kai, Chips, and Julia. Right now, I'm talking to Brian. He's been active and he was on urethra which is also in minority on this tribe. He talked about how me, him, and Kai should work together, and I'm down for it as long as it keeps me safe. However, I know that Brian is sketchy and not someone I'm really keen on. There's Jaiden and Chips. I love Chips, but I'm worried he may hold our previous experiences against me. Jaiden is such a wild card I don't know what to expect from him. He told me he wanted a F2 but he said that to me the last times we played too and I couldn't trust him. Julia is a part of that BB group I'm seeing and we played in a mini before, she voted for me everytime and I'm upset about it. Adrian is cool, and so is Kai,. Bodhi has been MIA. The immunity is tasks and I'm trying to do a lot for my tribe so they don't think I'm worthless and I can keep me safe. I poured water over my head! And put vegetable oil in my yogurt! Brian is really trying to build trust with me. He freaking shared the idol clue with me and revealed he lost the points for our tribe. Always Eat Soggy Waffles. Whether it's faked or not we'll see, but I assumed North before cause all the hosts are from the north. I'm happy I was out and had an alibi which actually happened. Thanks fam for losing my social security and birth certificate. The challenge was fun but someone took us to tribal for a freaking advantage when we were in the lead. And now this fucking tribal is a mess. I'm pretty sure that Bodhi took the advantage. It just screams Bodhi whatever the fuck his unique last name is. He's inactive also but I know he's smart, and he's going to be the death of this tribe, but people want Julia, and I can see it. She's also inactive and she has more connections with people. Adrian threw out Kai's name cause he didn't accept friend requests, but I am sort of working with Kai. Kai is with Brian though, and I can't necessarily trust Brian. It kept on switching back and forth, but in order to save myself in this game, I thought that I should try to appease Adrian, give him what he wants and vote Kai. Adrian is clearly with Julia and Bodhi, but I'm already fucked up as it is. I wanted Bodhi, he's not trustworthy at all, damn it. I'm already screwed over. I'm breaking the trust of my allies. And i can't fucking deal with this. Fuck this. Fuck everything. Bodhi can choke. Julia can leave. Kai can stay in the UK. Brian can not speak ever again. Everything can just go ahh! I hate this, I hate everything. I shouldn't have applied to this game. I should of just never played an org again I know that this is the shit that happens and it's so stupid. Whoever took that advantage, I will fight you. I'm an idiot. I'm the worst. I suck at this game. Andrea was talking about me not Zeke.

The whole 4 hours leading up to the tribal, everything is chaotic. You first see me throwing Bodhi's name around and then having people jump on the gun like Rob. He's telling me that he's known for sabotaging the tribe for secret advantages, and he's doing all the dirty work for me- telling Chris, Brian and Jaiden. Next comes Chris, who's not so sure that Bodhi is the right person to vote, and I had to find this out from Brian, who told me that he wanted Julia out. So I talk to him and I'm like wtf, shes one of the original Ysabela. We have 5 people strong and you're gonna waste it on Julia? How stupid can you be? We should be taking it out on Kai, the one person that hasn't been talking to anyone (well me mainly). But aside from that. WTF!?!? Couple hours later, Julia FINALLY arrives and talks strategy, and she's a helluva sweet person. Like Chris targeting her is extremely stupid and really really dumb on his part, and so we created the "Howdy" alliance with myself, Julia, Jaiden, and Rob and we all decided that with the inactive Kai that makes 5 people voting Kai and we save Julia and Bodhi, and keep my plans of Ysabela strong at 5. So I am confident that this will work!!

Okay wtf was that? A blind tribal with a chaos idol? Holy fuck. Jaiden is a savage motherfucker and I didn't realize how much of an asshole he can be for sabotaging our tribe like that for a secret advantage that took out one of our strongest members. Like I love Chris and everything, but he played his own self and I am here on Day 11, happy and dandy and really I'm just glad that Jaiden didn't target me at all. Since it is Day 11, I think I need to assess my new tribe after that chaotic voteoff. - Julia is safe and she thinks that I'm her #1 ally. - Bodhi is safe cause he thought I voted with him and kept him in the loop about voting Julia - Brian thinks that I'm the one Ysabella that would "let him in" on my plans with the 5, cause he's desperately scared of going home premerge. - Rob is a sweetheart, but I don't know how he plays considering that he will jump on anything that would take him further in this game. - Jaiden, phew KING of surviving the Triangle and pulling off that dangerous move. I think that he's gonna be target number one if we don't win this next immunity challenge, but I could not care less because that means I'm safe for another few days and he can take his risky ass back home! - Kai, should've gone home over Chris, but what can you do? I'll try to get him out this round.

So Brian comes to me after tribal council saying that the tribal was fucked over. I'm playing the sweet little innocent that is playing the sympathy card. Sure I was blindsided by the vote too but with me, I never wanted Julia or Bodhi to go home. I wanted Kai gone and with Chris sprouting Julia's name left and right- I got over that shock immediately and I'm trying to console Brian as much as I can. He's like this adorable puppy that gets scared with literally everything. I'm just petting him and calming him down. Making sure he's sedated and doesn't do anything wild that might screw me in the process before its time for me to neuter him >:) 

Ok, so CHRIS went home. This is not good. This is not good at all. I've just lied to you. I'm glad to have been blindsided. I'm now getting an opportunity to build even closer trust with Kai, and I think that'll be incredibly valuable for me.

Im the fucking worst

Guess who is REAPING SOME INFO me So Kai told me that when you search North, mossy, mossy pit, there's an "idol table," which basically asks you to put in a number every day to see if you find something. I'll be looking there when I get the chance. Then Dana told me that she got the clue "Never Eat Sucky Waffles. What's wrong with this?" We're thinking out the possibilities. She thinks that Sucky not being Soggy is the problem, but I think the problem is that it left out Middle. But who knows. I've worked on solidifying bonds with Kai and Rob, and I think it's going to really pay off in the long run. It better. If they're lying to me, I'm fucked, because I'm saying stuff about disliking my old tribe mates to gain their trust

Ok, I have a dilemma. I want to win this next challenge, because I want to prove to my tribe that I'm not gonna be throwing challenges. However, I don't want Dana to go home, and I do want Adrian to go home. I also want to get rid of Jaiden and Julia. Throwing the next 3 challenges would be in my best interest if not for the fact that people are aware of my challenge throwing past. I need to prove my worth so that I don't get voted out, but I also need to play a smart game.

Ya girl got an idol board tonight. Catch me getting all the idols this season honestly. 

From looking past seasons that used an idol board, I know using it alone is kind of ineffective. If I can look 1 time a day with 81 options, my odds aren't great. Right now I literally can't tell anyone about it though, because everyone I trust is on the other tribe and his name is Bodhi. I tried to tease out some idol info from Lily tonight, since she and I have been getting close since swap. We literally have so much in common, more than anybody i've met in an ORG before, so that makes talking really easy. She said she's been looking in the ocean and hasn't found anything. Ok chill. Maybe that's tru, there are 9 places to look... BUT I looked there once and found a clue tho sooo. Perhaps Lily is lyin or maybe she isn't, I can't tell, so i'm not giving her any hints about the idol board. But I did tell her I got an extra idol search from reward in good faith to build trust. Also am I being terrible or is Jenna actually annoying? I might target her if given the chance. On 5/29/17, at 1:14 AM, jenna (kamikaze host) wrote: > what does my mango do UMM IDK BUT PROBABLY SOMETHING SINCE YOU WON'T STOP BRINGING IT UP LIKE THOSE DAMN FRUITS ARE USELESS.

It's really not looking good for us again... I think we're gonna have to goto tribal... again

Today, I attempted to bolster my relationship with Kai. I was trying to talk to him about the challenge, but he said something along the lines of "my score isn't very high yet, I'm gonna go play minecraft." Right away, I think back to my old addiction. I used to play way too much minecraft, but I haven't in about 2 years now. That is, up until today. Kai wants to play minecraft? Then so do I! We get in a call, and talk about a bunch of different stuff. Nothing substantial, but enough to make him feel like I'm very much on his side. And I am on his side, but I need to make sure that he trusts me enough going forward. He asked me how many survivor ORGs I've played, so I told him the answer (5 including this one) and he told me his answer (this is his first.) He seems to trust my judgment in terms of who is the best vote enough to at least consider what I'm saying, but not enough to consider it infallible. To be honest, I'm glad thats the case. I don't want to be his 'superior' per say, I'd rather be his guiding friend who he couldn't survive without. We talked about seasons that he likes, and out of the few seasons that he's seen, Game Changers and Cambodia are in his top 3. That's an icky set of choices in my opinion, but he's entitled to disagree. He likes seasons because of strategy, which is very valuable to know. He'll be down for a good strat talk, but he'll also be too ready to make a big move if he feels threatened by me. I hope he is enough of a baby bird that he wants to stick with me permanently, but I do think that he has the potential to flip on me. I don't think that he is planning on doing so yet, but if the opportunity arises at final 7ish, I wouldn't be that surprised. I LOVE THIS CHALLENGE. I am CREMATING everyone else. I am CIRCUMCISING them with DENTAL FLOSS. This challenge is MINE TO WIN. can i get an amen please?

I just decimated this challenge so hard. I needed to do something to redeem my throwing challenges in the past. I spent most of my 17th birthday playing this challenge, and I was done already in the very morning with my highest score. What a massive waste of a day. Now I'm a challenge threat to some extent. Icky

Daisy just told me to make a confessional. I just made one, but I'll make another for you daisy

This. Sucks. I don't wanna. I don't wanna. Well. I have so many ideas of who should go home but idk. We will see.

I'm probably going to get voted out. I haven't talked with anyone because of this illness and going camping. Maybe they'll be better off without me anyway.

The past few challenges had 2 of our castaways have birthdays. 1 of them did really really shitty on the reward challenge and really cost us a fruit basket and a challenge advantage. Then, the other literally outscored everyone in this immunity challenge and gave us the night off- even with the advantage going into the challenge. This is the second time where I'm immune from tribal council where the opposing tribe had an advantage. It seems to me like these reward challenges with advantages as the reward prove to be really ironic and I love that!! If I can get to the merge with little blood on my hands I'll be set.

Me doing the best in the challenge on my tribe? A concept. Like I'm always useless when it comes to challenges so if I'm doing well and you aren't, it's because you aren't trying.   I knew this was going to happen because I'M SMART AND I SEE RIGHT THROUGH THESE PEASANTS. They don't give a fuck about the challenge because they have better shit going on, but guess what? Now my ass is on the line and the people on my tribe probably think i'm an easy elim. Except me and my girlfriend the hidden immunity idol are here to shake shit up and push our own agenda. The only person who is even talking to me after this loss is Gage, and if that isn't telling then idk what is. Lily is probably just not around right now to be honest and i'm sure we'll talk later, but I have no idea what everyone else is thinking. [5/29/17, 10:23:30 PM] Dana: fuck, i hate this so much. now im worried. any thoughts? [5/29/17, 10:23:35 PM] Gage :): None [5/29/17, 10:23:42 PM] Gage :): Like I'm basically voting where you vote [5/29/17, 10:23:46 PM] Gage :): Because I'm not gonna lie [5/29/17, 10:23:58 PM] Gage :): The only people on this tribe that speak to me are you and lily [5/29/17, 10:24:14 PM] Dana: haha aint that the truth. I literally only talk to you and lily [5/29/17, 10:26:06 PM] Dana: i have no idea how to vote, but i really want to work with you and Lily no matter what [5/29/17, 10:26:26 PM] Gage :): Literally exact same [5/29/17, 10:26:28 PM] Gage :): Honestly [5/29/17, 10:26:39 PM] Gage :): If us 3 stick together we could probably control this vote Gage wanted to pull in Mitch, and confirmed he wasn't close with Jenna and Zach, so hopefully I can work with Mitch too. Lily and I were already close and this morning I found out Willa is close with her too, that they think they have Nick from their OG tribe, and that they are getting closer with Zach. So the plan I heard was: Gage, Lily, Willa, Mitch, Me, and probably Nick/ Zach. Well that only leaves Jenna to go, except Zach and Jenna are close and nobody threw her name out there. As long as it isn't me, Lily, or Gage at this point idrc who goes home because those are the people I see myself working with moving forward in the game. UPDATE: As I write this, Gage has gone missing. Of course, the bitch herself, random.org, is out to ruin my plans once again. Gage better crawl his way back to this tribe because I need him. I'll even go save his lost ass myself if I have to. If things don't start coming together really soon, I'm playing my idol and Jenna and her infamous boyfriend are out of here.

Yes!! Finally we don't have to go to tribal council this feels so good!!!

to know its me from now on, imma start each of my confessionals off with three stars. *** okay, so let me break down the vote. I have no fucking idea who's leaving. I'm closely aligned with Jenna and Nicholas, kind of Lily. The thing is... Lily and I have a past that like... resulted in me voting her out/getting rid of her and like ruining her dreams. so, i feel bad and i do love love her sOOOO much and wanna work with her. The name i've been hearing is Mitch. I don't really wanna vote out one of my original tribe members from the Cigateo tribe but like I doubt that will come into play. I also like wIlla. this was boring ims orry lmao fuck

Rob just gave me the shittiest attitude, so guess who I'm going to get voted out next time we have tribal council?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ib5M-GUByMc&feature=youtu.be

Brian and I have convinced Adrian that Brian is Brian Heidik. Adrian is turning so fucking artificial and being such a fan girl. It's hilarious. I can't wait for Adrian to find out at the merge.