#and it seeps back sometimes during affc too

[ilynpilled]

A Game of Thrones - Catelyn X

A Clash of Kings - Catelyn VII

A Storm of Swords - Jaime I

A Storm of Swords - Jaime III

A Storm of Swords - Jaime III

A Storm of Swords - Jaime IV

Jaime & Passive Suicidal Ideation

His statements and actions concerning the subject are framed as him not being afraid. But he is. He is afraid of what he has become, afraid of confronting himself, afraid of confronting the world, and he is afraid of having to live.

He should not be brave enough to die. He should be brave enough to live.

#i dont think a lot of ppl acknowledge that pre hand loss jaime kinda wants to fucking die deep down #especially when he forgets his fixation on cersei #it is such an interesting obsession that he has with a ‘chivalrous’ death #he completely romanticizes this idea despite his dissillusionment with knighthood #again death is so much easier than confronting the moral paradoxes dilemmas and his self-concept #he is deep down very aware about what he has become and he desperately seeks purpose in just dying with sword in hand #and he does not even reconsider until brienne confronts him and reveals this ideation for what it is #it is cowardice on his part #it is a facade of bravery masking self loathing #dying is easy living is hard #honestly jaime pre handloss was basically just a man slowly destroying himself #and it seeps back sometimes during affc too #hed rather die than end up facing damnation despite all of his efforts #now damnation that is something he is terrified of #valyrianscrolls #asoiaf #jaime lannister