#and that interaction uncomfortably reverberates for years afterwards in what naturally morphs into a familial relationship? oh!

[etirabys]

something that peeves me in fiction – in a setting where society that hasn't mostly eliminated scarcity, anyway – is when someone really kindhearted takes in a near stranger in need (e.g. orphan, ex slave) and that person is their only project to whom they can give a lot of care. irl I feel like everyone who's exceptionally nice, or at least bad at drawing a line for their own health, has a full case load and is close to burnout

I don't mind this at all when there's a good plot reason for why X should be helping Y in particular and isn't already overbooked; I feel some ugh when X is depicted as someone who'd always help people in Y's shoes but has mysteriously evaded all other supplicants.

I'm pro-fantasy but this kind of moral fantasy strikes me as a bit uglier than the others: you can be a nurturing figure who gives unconditional help without running something so unphotogenic as a vetting interview or cost/benefit analysis, but you'll never be overwhelmed, either

#rambl #also would enjoy it if X took in Y and the scene was played as a 'and now you are my only son' vibe and then. Y comes home. #and X's house is full of other orphans who are going to eat him alive #conversely i think a vetting interview could be played really well – no one WANTS to do that! (hence people's numbers for strangers #helped extensively being either 0 or 10+) but if an adopter is weird enough... like 'orphan boy. answer my riddles twenty' #and that interaction uncomfortably reverberates for years afterwards in what naturally morphs into a familial relationship? oh! #like yes. you are my dad now. and you have three other kids (your limit) who were grilled the same way. and we love each other but #we all started off on a footing that was maximally inimical to simulating unconditional parental love.