#anyway first thing is If you ever wanna know how depraved the mind behind blog dirtbra1n is then ask about the genshin mindpalace

[dirtbra1n]

heyo dirtbrain I got two for you for that ship ask game. first is wangxian. second is zhongli & childe bc i know nothing abt genshin impact and also bc the opinions i do have kind of relate to both of these asks which is fun

hello kiri Really tickled by your second selection here. I will try to be brief, (1/137)

literally every single time I think about mdzs I have this constant incessant need to say out loud I DO LIKE WANGXIAN. to my ghost audience. because I really really do. but I’m not Compelled. there are things that compel me and wangxian’s not doing much of any of it. it’s all there already….. which is . where’s the fun in that for me…….. granted though I still haven’t read the properly localized novels yet. started reading the first one the other day but it’s at the bottom of the priority list I guess you could add this one. because there are other more pressing issues at hand. I guess it’s. I’m a terrible marriage (complicated definition) fan and wangxian are so Regular marriage. good for them! but come on guys…..

Also colored in large part probably by the way mdzs fandom was in like 2019/20 and the shredding of lan zhan’s character . different rabbithole different day I hope it’s gotten better in the time I’ve been away . I do still miss my friend wei wuxian though They could never make me hate you king…….

zhongli childe genshin impact though Ha ha. ohhh man.

boring people yaoi is the worlds most egregious crime to me and I’m NOT kidding. I think I’ve mentioned to you kiri my extensive personal genshin mindpalace. and these two are both in there as two of four major players. probably also mentioned the debaucherous tilt this entire mindpalace has happening.

the point I’m not getting at here but am steering towards anyway is that childe knows that zhongli has the power to crush him and the earth he stands on with a lifted pinky and is so into it because he’s a violence freak. and so he’s constantly trying to push zhongli’s buttons, trying to see if he can move the mountain if he just shoves hard enough, shoves in the right way, at the right time. not that there’s not also like. resentment. some complicated feelings bubbling. I wouldn’t care at all if there wasn’t. mindpalace wouldn’t exist if there wasn’t. another rabbithole for another day.

anyway zhongli feels far too old for this. consciously. he feels too old for this consciously I don’t think the boring yaoi people are wrong on principle when they put that old man in Situations. I do so myself. they’re just wrong because they’re not putting enough struggle into it. because I think that zhongli knows what childe’s after and is determined not to give him anything. and yet simultaneously will see him in the right lighting or covered in gore and think I want to eat him. no quicker way to feel your age. he was a martial god, you know. it’s not that he’s averse to violence or the eroticism of it on principle you can’t be a martial god who is Normal about violence. but if you see this twenty-something human being who is trying to rile you up, trying to get you where he wants you, and you let him… you have to be a much kinder, more feeble minded man than zhongli. work harder, gongzi. try harder.

he’s also just not immune to it is the thing. pride be damned the actual thing stopping him is probably the ‘feeling like a cradle robber’ thing

all that said on this topic I’m citing one of my favorite tweets ever

#the bookmark is me #you know who REALLY suffers from the fucking grumpy one/sunshine one curse. wangxian. BIG TIME. #anyway first thing is If you ever wanna know how depraved the mind behind blog dirtbra1n is then ask about the genshin mindpalace #i honestly probably won’t answer. i have my fun though #second thing is If you’re reading this about what terrible marriage is you can ask and immediately trigger epic-length unskippable dialogue #from a dirtbrain whose passion on the topic is something like three and a half years or so years old #i Am going to finish that fic someday. god willing or whatever #askbox #thank you kiri for asking. if i cared less about my public image i could probably keep going on the zhongli childe thing #still don’t call ‘childe’ that though. doesn’t matter i’ll go back to writing or something

[funeralbelle]

gillian jacobs, joel mchale, and any other community cast of interest + 👥

SEND ME AN FC + 👥 TO SEE A CHARACTER I’D etc etc

gillian jacobs

I rly love the idea of her in a Pagliacci role!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I feel like her vibes during her depressive episodes in Love really radiate that suicidal clown energy and I would def play her as a small time comedian who tells herself that she’s constantly chasing near-death situations in search for material and not in search for oblivion.

also she’s been in so many raunchy movies that i feel like she could definitely play a nymphomaniac. and this is maybe an unrelated tangent but,,,  you see a lot of promiscuous female characters in the rpc, but i’ve never seen one who’s actually interested in sex..? usually the trend is female characters who feel unloved and use sex as a fill-in or gateway to a sense of intimacy. and this isn’t any shade at, like, nina’s character zelda or yam’s character nikki (especially because i use the same trope with my character genie), but when you combine all of the muses with this characterization together, i feel like we as a community accidentally enforce the idea that women don’t get titillated and just use romance as a bargaining chip for love?? 🤪 

idk maybe it’s just my experience but i always see the love-starved harlot more than any legit horny girls so lets get more of those and lets use gillian jacobs for the roles because thinking about it now i’m pretty sure that even her character on Love has that same characterization. damn

joel mchale

I’m determined!!!!!! to use him for something!!!!! 

my first priority is gwen’s rp americana; originally i thought he would be good for The Professor bt i haven’t had any rly novel ideas to bring to the table for that skeleton yet and i wanna avoid using him in the same career as his Community character. plus i think i’d want to play him in a skeleton that compliments him being like 6′5″ and jacked. hes also rly.. aryan looking… so he could make a perfect Detective if i can get over my hang-ups and play a cop in remotely good faith. but failing that i might end up applying for The Suspect w/ him.

on the flipside, I feel like he’d be rly good for a p.i. character that’s been floating around my head for a long time but whom I haven’t rly had the chance to develop bc I’ve pretty much just been in college rps for the last half a decade. woulda considered this muse for MW if i wasn’t already planning to bring in tom/sal.

that character is a Hunter S Thompson type— tragically optimistic and repeatedly outraged every time mankind disappoints him; constantly trying to believe in the best of people in an industry where he’s dealing with the most depraved individuals. tried to unionize his private investigation firm (love the futility of trying to organize behind the back of the boss of a band of snoops) and wound up getting underhandedly fired so he had to go independent. hardened more in demeanor than heart; numbs the hell of being repeatedly let down with a rock & roll lifestyle that he should’ve outgrown in his thirties. still clinging onto a Gen X obsession with authenticity that obnoxiously makes him roll his eyes at any cashier who smiles and tells him to have a great day. comes across as crass and tactless, desensitized to vulgarity and clumsy when it comes to tenderness despite perpetually yearning for it. compulsively anti-authority to the point of impairing his judgment at times; easily manipulated by anyone who portrays themselves as an underdog. probably comes from a family without a nurturing female presence; could definitely picture him with a businessman younger sibling whom he resents because they’ve “sold out” (read: they’re flourishing financially) while he’s 48 years old and has no sheets on his bed because it’s been a week and he still hasn’t taken them out of the dryer and he keeps passing out on the couch anyway so he’s not really thinking about it.

The biggest struggle in using McHale for this character is that he’s a little too fratty and it’s hard to picture him as this chainsmoking gonzo. but i try to play fcs against type and i feel like he always gets cast as characters who are wealthy/charming/two-faced/detached/nihilistic, and this is definitely as far away from that as i can get. maybe ill do a deep dive into his filmography and find something where he wasnt playing a white collar hunk or douchebag. idk…,,we’ll see. maybe ill use a completely different fc for that character and use mchale for one of the americana skeletons instead?? idk i havent gotten that far yet but i cant stop making gifs of him i’m having so much fun i want to use him so bad idk

one last option is like… ever since those reddit stories got popular, ive always wanted to play a search-and-rescue officer for a national park? and i feel like he almost has forest ranger vibes in the later seasons of community when he has the beard. i dont know where i would play this character but to be fair i have literally no clue where i would play a private investigator either so it’s. yeah

donald glover

i played him back when i used to write in rly wild and campy/comedic supernatural/genre plots!! the original conceit of that character was a law school dropout who swindled an eldritch demon out of his almighty powers, but had such low motivation in life and such a one-track mind that he never thought to use it for any kind of world domination, and instead tried to use it to win back and impress her by giving himself a promotion to manager of the bowling alley he worked at, or make her life without him seem subconsciously bleaker by doing innocuous bullshit like making her breakfast cereal have less marshmallows in it than usual. i don’t know if i would revisit him, but if i did it might be fun to have him have a jackass genie type of relationship with another character in a 1x1, or drop the supernatural aspect entirely and reimagine him as a burnout who suddenly inherited a huge amount of money, only for it to gradually be revealed that it came from some shady means, or something. i don’t know. fucking love his tag on my blog though

alison brie

I think one of the reasons I resent Annie Edison so much is because you can tell Dan Harmon was too obsessed with her to let her be the butt of any jokes or make her look bad in any way, and so even though Alison Brie is an extremely charming and funny actress, she never got to portray any really human or interesting flaws, because all of Annie’s negative traits were just the kind of corny weaknesses you list in a job interview (she’s just too driven!!! a perfectionist to a fault!!~~) and I think that by season 3 she became the thing every viewer was worried Britta would be in the pilot (boring moral compass of a carrot dangling in front of the male protagonist to motivate his character growth). And it just feels like a waste of an actress who could easily find humor in an uglier character and make them sympathetic. So I genuinely want to do something like that with her, like make her a former activist who completely sold out her morals for a gig as a commentator on a corporate news outlet or working on softening PR for some Raytheon or Lockheed Martin type of company. I also love villains with her mousy-petite-big-blue-eyed disney-faced look who are more perniciously manipulative and unsuspecting, so I’d love to do that. 

on an unrelated note: she looks sm like natalia dyer and especially after she got really skinny circa 2016, she would be a rly good timeskip cast for the older, strung-out version of my character max? 

wld definitely gif brie in Sleeping With Other People & How to Be Single & Community s5 + s6 if sage and i ever went through with that timekip plot or if i ever found a place to play a conniving daffodil.

#gwennifcr #( rpc. ) #i literally cant get over how beautiful gwens gifs are #also absolutely criminal how few gifs there are of bearded donald glover i had to go thru hell to find that one #stares at the atlanta gif packs ive started and aborted like twelve times. #someday

[diveronarpg]

Congratulations, ROGUE! You’ve been accepted for the role of ORSINO with an approved FC change to FRANCOIS ARNAUD. Admin Jen: There is an edge of decadent madness to your vision of Orion and from the moment I noted it as I was reading, my heart was immediately captured by the princely wild card that you’ve presented to us. Words truly fail to describe how gripping he is - from his dangerous boredom to his unique brand of cunning. I was as unnerved by him as I was in awe of him and I think that on its own is a testament to the impact of your wonderful vision, Rogue. I can’t wait to watch as he brings utter ruin to Verona! Please read over the checklist and send in your blog within 24 hours.

WELCOME TO THE MOB.

Out of Character

Alias | Rogue.

Age | 22.

Preferred Pronouns | She/Her.

Activity Level | A font of words here, mostly.

Timezone | PST.

In Character

Character | That Bitch Orsino. Can I get Francois Arnaud? I wanna look like the messiest hottest man alive thank you.

What drew you to this character? | What I really wanted was a Capulet, because there’s a whole side of Verona I haven’t explored, and I’m a nosy bitch, so it started there. After going through the open characters, Orion really stuck with me, because I don’t have a character who exhibits true villainy the way he does. I have two characters full of ambition, and Orion has none, which in my mind makes him far more dangerous. His wants are kaleidoscopic, and the selfish whims he exhibits are so juicy and rich. I want to play in this playground all day and night. He’s the true definition of chaotic neutral; he isn’t always cruel because that’s boring, and it doesn’t always serve him. He isn’t kind because that would never serve him. Each moment is a choice, a flight of fancy, a way to have fun, and the level of unpredictability is delightful and sinful as hell.

What is a future plot ideas you have in mind for the character? | ✘ — I would like to play with Orion growing bored. Increasingly challenging Cosimo to give him something more exciting to play with, and either getting what he wants or growing tired of it enough to say, lay the groundwork for chaos. Whether that means slipping secrets to the media, trying to seduce and kill a Montague, or even fucking around a Capulet, Orion makes things entertaining for himself. He doesn’t care what the sides are so long as he gets fed.

✘ — One of Orion’s defining traits is that he’s unwilling to lie. He does terrible things, of course he does, but asked point blank and he’ll tell you: ❝ Darling, did you expect anything less ? How charmingly quaint. ❞ He’ll take his lashes with a smile and scream as much as you ask him to, so to speak. What I really want is for him to find someone he’d lie for. Someone or something he cares more about than his own self-image. Maybe that’s impossible, but I’d like to think it isn’t, if only because everyone needs to be knocked on their ass. Someone he so enjoys corrupting he’d rather have them to himself, perhaps. Maybe someone so depraved and wicked they delight him and fascinate him endlessly. Either way, the first moment his tongue spills tales for him, he knows he’s in too deep, ferociously attempting to claw his way out. Do they let him?  

✘ — I don’t know that Orion experiences true loyalty, but he does have a possessive quality to him, and in that way, he cares for people. He has no qualms betraying them if it gets him what he wants, but them betraying him? That is akin to blasphemy. I would, therefore, like to plot that out with someone. Betray him! Betray him! Honestly, though, what he would do is the height of despicable, and that’s peak favorite Orion for me.

✘ — Now for the other side of the above coin. The people he calls “friends” are his belongings, the toys he plays with. In the same breath, I do think that he has that sort of wild mentality: no one breaks my toys but me. He is just as monstrous to those who hurt them as he is to them when he grows bored, because the ownership he feels is absolute. So I’d also love to have him go after someone for hurting someone close to him. When they laugh at how soft he’s become, he only ever has one response: ❝ They were mine to ruin, and I am not kind to thieves. ❞

Are you comfortable with killing off your character? | I’m fine with dying or fine with living. I do imagine how funny it would look if Orion is last man standing, just smoking and watch the city burn, but he deserves death really and should get it.

In Depth

❃ — What is your favorite place in Verona? He’s been forced to attend this silly little survey, and any time anyone forces him anywhere, it doesn’t bode well. Orion props his feet up on the coffee table, scuffing the glass as he pulls a cigarette from his pocket. He lights it, leaning back into the couch and really getting comfortable. There is no indication that he heard the question. After a prolonged and uncomfortable silence in which Orion smokes and occasionally trails ash across the table, ignoring the ashtray sitting off to the side, Cosimo’s little secretary opens her mouth to ask again.

Orion lets her get out half a syllable before cutting in, mostly because he was in the middle of blowing smoke in her direction. ❝ Starting out soft. Is that Cosimo’s style, now ? ❞ When the girl doesn’t answer, Orion rolls his eyes. ❝ Pick your favorite place in Verona and write that down. ❞ When she doesn’t move, he stills, gaze kept on her face until she makes eye contact almost by mistake. Whatever she sees there causes her to bend her head and write, and he smiles. ❝ Good girl. ❞

❃ — What does your typical day look like? Now this is juicy. He imagines the answers the other simpering idiots he works with gave, trying to figure out how Cosimo stands to read the drivel. This is a game, of course, that they play every so often. Flat, boring questions that belie dangerous intent. If the answers don’t match what’s on file, you get in trouble. If they match too closely, you must be reading a script.

❝ A typical day ? ❞ he asks, mockery infusing every syllable. ❝ I make things happen. ❞ He clouds the space between them with smoke again, watching with a small kick of relish as she waves her hand through it, trying to dispel a little. Cosimo knows he’s an art dealer, and he certainly doesn’t want to hear about his day job, so Orion doesn’t waste his breath on it. ❝ I get whatever’s necessary out of the way, find someone to fuck, bother my superiors, and crash. ❞ His eyes flick toward the paper where she’s meant to be taking notes. ❝ Be sure to quote me directly, piccolina. If you censor me, he’ll know, and we’ll both be very disappointed. ❞      

❃ — What has been your biggest mistake so far? Orion throws his head back with a laugh and it sounds impossibly indulgent, richly decadent — it’s a sound that makes someone want to know the joke just so they can join, so they can feel included when it sounds so terribly exclusive. The look he gives her positively oozes confidence. ❝ I wonder how many of them cried to you about their sad little histories, ❞ he muses, shaking his head. ❝ Diciamo pane al pane e vino al vino. I don’t make mistakes, and I don’t regret a thing. ❞

❃ — What has been the most difficult task asked of you? ❝ Bella, bella, ❞ he says, shaking his head in chastisement. He knows she has no option but to throw these questions at him, but Orion enjoys making her squirm, anyway. It’s more fun to see fear and longing in her eyes than to admit he’s stringing her along. ❝ You should know the answer by now. ❞ He waits, eyes bright through the dim haze of smoke he’s permeated the room with. He wonders if she wants to open the window, but is too afraid to move — he has her pinned like a butterfly beneath his gaze. After a moment, hetsks under his breath, taking another drag. ❝ No one asks me for anything difficult. That’s the problem. A challenge ? Now that would shock me. ❞

❃ — What are your thoughts on the war between the Capulets and Montagues? This question is new. It must be because the war is ramping up in truth, no longer played out in the shadows but firmly thrust into the light. He pretends to consider it, trying to think of what will most shock or horrify her. ❝ My thoughts ? I like seeing them bleed, ❞ he says, ❝ and I like best when they beg me for it. ❞ He deliberately doesn’t name the Montagues entirely, letting her believe and write what she wants. In truth, it doesn’t matter to him in the least, beyond the money Cosimo’s paying to keep him on retainer.

Most of them aren’t real, anyway. They’re too small, too ill-conceived and weak, running around worried about things like loyalty and fear. He’d rather be dead than what they are, two colors of ants in two hills, scurrying around and taking on more weight than they can bear. He might leave the whole city behind, if they weren’t so fun to play with, burning under his magnifying glass until there’s nothing left.

#accepted: orsino #accepted