#anyway i have no doubt that you're ugly and a loser and your life is going nowhere fast and also if this was irl youd be meek as fuck

[ef-1]

A day after Daniel fucks over Yuki, you post a photo of yourself wearing enchante,, you're not slick

Skinny white girl like Ricciardo? Ground breaking lol

it's so tragic how you're just gonna have to die mad about it 💋

#it did give me the giggles though bc HOW DARE I WEAR MY OWN CLOTHES!!! SHOCK AND HORROR!!!! #sometimes tumblr gives me askfm scandal of catholic boarding school fame 😍 like there was this girl that used to live INSIDE my ass #she'd offer me gum and food and ask to plait my hair then we had a massive askfm bullying scandal where the school banned askfm #long story short she was saying the most HORRIFIC things about me bc psycho ig #anyway i have no doubt that you're ugly and a loser and your life is going nowhere fast and also if this was irl youd be meek as fuck #and never look me in the eye #log off and find some friend or a purpose or something. God speed!!!

[hookahmancer]

Coldsteel: Hot and Cold Part 3

Sonic, Tails, Amy, and Knuckles are playing Mario Party as Amy gets salty saying everyone is targeting her because she's a girl. Sonic is winning and mutters "it's not cause you're A girl, it's cause you're low hanging fruit."

"What are you calling me ugly? Like I'm some rotted apple?"

A familiar crass voice says behind her "he's saying your weak"

Everyone looks and it's Shadow with his arms crossed exacerbated at their activities. Sonic jumps "What are YOU doing here Shadow? You come to fight?!"

"Unlike you, I don't waste my time with low skilled welps. You wouldn't be ready for a REAL danger with all this leisure activity."

Knuckles tells him to chill out and that he should play. Maybe pick Boo the ghost since he's all dark and brooding.

"I just came here to warn you about Coldsteel. He's up to something, I just don't know what." Sonic sits back down and grabs his controller.

"Oh is that all? That guy is even less of a threat than Eggmud..."

Tails interjects while playing still that Coldsteel is a cunning and ruthless guy, and his heart of gold only makes him more of a threat because he has passion and a motive behind his actions making him a superior villain. Sonic just mutters "are you still on that fanboy crap?"

Knuckles coughs and waves his hand. "Shadow put out that minty cigar or whatever you're smoking! It reaks! Shadow?"

Shadow isn't there and the smoke gets thicker where no-one can see what's in front of them. A hedgehog like figure emerges and grabs Amy who screams as the others realize they can't move or speak.

Unbeknownst to the others, her captor is Coldsteel. Who in her paralyzed state he ties to a chair.

"Nothing person-el kiddo. The paralysis should wear off soon... I just didn't want those losers getting in my way."

"What's this all about Coldsteel? Sonic is gonna destroy you when he finds me! Even a DNA test wouldn't be able to recognize you!"

"Oh wow it's already wearing off, that was fast..."

"That's right. I'm A strong, independent woman with an even stronger immune system!"

"Well, this ain't A controlled substance girly... I'll keep ya paralyzed as long as I have too to get what I want."

Amy blushes but pretends to oppose

"Wha...what?! Are you going to have your way with me?! But I'm Sonic's girl! I will scream until your ears bleed as you...ravage me like some sorta primitive Neanderthal!"

"...what?"

"I know a petite, sophisticated, WAY OUT OF YOUR LEAGUE girl like me must be irresistible to your savage instincts but when Sonic finds out you won't be going to normal bad guy jail. You'll be going to hardcore bad guy jail where like, subreddit mods go!"

"Nothing person-el kid, but no. I'm just gonna keep you here until the Stockholm syndrome kicks in."

"Oh...so I'm not good enough for you is that it?! You think I'm ugly too?! Well look at you, Barney the dinosaur looking ass mother fucker!"

Coldsteel has an annoyed bored look on his face and inhales his vape, breathing it over Amy's face to paralyze her again.

Meanwhile when the others come too Sonic goes running around looking for Amy before Knuckles and Tails can even say anything. Knuckles and Tails get in Tail's airplane to scout the skies for Sonic and see the blue blur heading toward Dr. Eggman's lair who is bossing around his robots to adjust this giant golden statue of him while he drinks lemonade and says "no no, over there! Stupid robots..." Sonic tackles Eggman and starts wailing on Eggman.

"Where is she?!" "What are you blathering about hedgehog?!" Sonic continues to pummel Eggman as Tails and Knuckles yell at Sonic to stop from afar. As Tails lands, Knuckles jumps out and pulls Sonic off of a crying and battered Eggman.

"Stop going Christian Bale on him Sonic, we know this had to be Coldsteel's doing!"

"Don't you think I know that?! But Eggturd here is the one pulling the strings!"

A tear of pain rolls down Eggman's swollen black eye as he turns to his side whimpering and pees himself.

"I somehow doubt that..."

As this goes on. Coldsteel is just sitting there glaring at Amy. Amy can talk again and snide remarks "you know... Kidnapping is a pretty serious crime! Those real super villains are just gonna love your Lilac color tone!"

"Well good thing you're not a kid huh?"

"I...you call everyone a...SONIIIIICCCCC"

He gets up furiously "What do you see in that dumb ass anyway?! I'm way cooler than he is!"

"Is that what this is about? Jealously?" "Kinda"

"People like Sonic because he's a kind, caring hedgehog who shows mercy even to those who don't deserve it."

Sonic is punching Eggman again "I know you did it! I know you did it!" Tails crying like the Simpson's meme "stop STOP! HE'S ALREADY DEAD!!!"

"He's also smart. He's like a Sherlock Holmes who can get to the bottom of an unsolvable mystery and have the answers to everything!"

Sonic puts down Eggman and says "Shadow!" Knuckles just mutters "Why would Shadow have warned us about Coldsteel if it was him?"

"And most of all he is selfless! He puts others before his own well being, especially his friends!"

Sonic shrugs and says "Enh, I never liked Amy much anyway..."

Amy glares into Coldsteel's eyes

"YOU are a petty little man who bullies everyone to get your way! You have no friends, and you suck as a villain! You're like..."

"What? Like Eggman?"

"Like Kevin..."

Dramatic music plays and lightning strikes. And Amy whispers

"Nothing person-el kid..." Coldsteel slaps her hard enough where she falls over still tied to the chair.

"Harder daddy!"

"What the fuck is wrong with this girl?"

The heroes are back home playing Mario Party without Amy and Tails sighs.

"It's not the same without Amy..." Sonic bored too responds

"You're right Tails. We need that fourth player... Your thumbs still work right Egghead?"

Sonic poking Eggman's nose with the controller while Eggman is in a full body cast muffling "I hate that hedgehog..."

Coldsteel sets Amy back up and she's still sassing

"Why do you even like me?!"

"I'm asking myself the same question..."

"You don't even know my name!"

"Yeah I do! It's, uhh..."

"You don't even know my name..."

"Sure I do! It's... Daisy?"

"No."

"Annie. Little Annie!" Coldsteel starts singing it's a hard knock life.

"I hate you."

The protagonists still playing and they just lay Eggman's controller on his chest, Knuckles says "maybe we should try harder to find Amy..."

Sonic tapping ferociously "She's fine..."

Coldsteel is in a scary clown mask revving up a chainsaw to her face "LOVE ME YA STUPID CUNT!"

"Learn my name ya stupid garbage person!"

Tails eating some chips "Amy could be in real danger..."

They're boxing and Amy knocks Coldsteel down in one blow reinacting Mohammad Ali's fight "WHAT'S MY NAME?!"

Knuckles goes to take a sip of soda, but stops before it reaches his lips when Shadow says "are you guys just gonna sit around and let this happen?"

Amy is singing Karaoke of Eminem "HI my name is, huh? My name is, who? My name is dikki dikki..." She puts the Mic up to Coldsteel's mouth

"Uhh... Tammy?" She pokes him in the eye with the Mic.

Shadow scolding these bunch of lollygaggers "Coldsteel is doing God knows what to your friend and you guys are just sitting around playing video games!"

Eggman is screaming under his bandages struggling and Shadow strips the mouth part so he can talk. "You fools do not have the faintest idea how serious this whole situation is! What those two are doing together is worse than any evil scheme I could come up with!"

Knuckles snorts "What? Some kind of fetish fanfic?"

"Worse echidna. CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT..."

"Arby. Omg your parents named you Arby's?! I love Arby's! We should get Arby's!"

Amy hits him in the face with her hammer.

"Oh my GOD how can you obsess over me when you won't even learn my name?! You're insufferable! How could anyone stand someone who is an obsessed little worm in a completely one-sided infatuation and tics all the cringe tropes of a gendered stereotype?! I...oh...oh no. I'm everything I hate..."

"Arby's? But the twisty fries..."

"NO NOT ARBY'S YOU MOUTH BREATHER."

Coldsteel's hiding place rumbles as Eggman's grounder robot drills from the bottom and Eggman, Sonic, Tails, and Knuckles jump out.

"Oh cool. Grindr! I remember you from the old animated..."

Eggman yells "Its grounder!"

The grounder robot says "naw naw, he's right... My date is just a block from here. Seeya boss." Grounder digs back down.

Sonic goes up to Amy "it's ok now Amy...you're safe."

"Don't touch me!" "What's gotten into you?!"

Eggman mutters "Coldsteel probably..." Tails, Knuckle, and Coldsteel do the black guys rap battle meme

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=TFdvfrWS7XQ

"What's gotten into me?! I have wasted too many nights pining over an ungrateful, selfish, egotistical toxic masculine man whom barely even notices I exist!"

"Why are we here again? Oh hey Amy..."

Coldsteel walks up and puts his arm around Amy sneering at Sonic

"Heh...nothing person-el kid!"

"And YOU... You are a reminder of why self care and confidence are so important! Did you honestly think if you just kept me here long enough I'd fall in love with you? You still don't know my name! You're like those dudes who send money to egirls but tell your friends you have a girlfriend!"

Eggman yells BETAAAA in the back like Jesse Lee

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=VRq4I1a1iVw

"I'm done with all hedgehogs. I don't wanna see any of you ever again. ESPECIALLY you Sonic!"

Amy just walks out. And Sonic says "geez what a bitch"

Coldsteel remarks "I hate to see her go, but I love to watch her leave..." Knuckles and and Eggman fist bump Coldsteel.

Everyone just decides to go home and Tails walking by Sonic

"So wait...does this mean Coldsteel never had any feelings for me?"

Eggman walks pass Tails "BETAAAA"

#sonicthehodgeheg #fanfic #sonic fan character