#because it's like yeah you're a threat in your struggle to secure power (and ofc marginalised men often DO hurt women around them in order

[cruelsister-moved2]

i also don’t think ‘security in your masculinity’ functions as a cure for violence against women. in fact, the cure is (put simply) compassion and empathy for women, the recognition that women are human beings, which is something masculinity is explicitly constructed against. because masculinity isn’t a biological reality, it’s a social construct defined against a feminine ‘other’ and associated with power. traits/behaviours/embodiment that one culture and time period associates with masculinity are associated with femininity in another.  In that context ‘security in your masculinity’ means... security that you don’t have to behave like [insert racialised/class-prejudiced portrayal of stereotypes male violence here] to preserve the privileges you expect to be surrounded by as a member of the dominant gender class. the irony in the ‘secure in my masculinity’ brag is that it makes the men with genuine cause to fear for their place in masculine hegemony (disabled men, gay men, trans men, men of colour, jewish men, immigrant men, working class men, etc) more of a threat than the men who are most secure within it. and now, under this framework, striving for inclusion within the privileged class, fighting to maintain its definitions, and subscribing to its values, is... feminist praxis?  and of course, in all of this, men’s experiences are centralised in the conversation of violence against women. violence against women becomes a tribal issue between groups of men, a.k.a 'feminist’ men are taking fundamentally the same perspective as the 3750 year old code of hammurabi.

#its so lazyyyyy #and when people are like im secure enough in my masculinity to paint my nails or whatever the whole thing really falls apart #like masculinity is a social construct #either youre saying 'im secure enough in my adherence to this social construct to occasionally divert from it' (thus legitimising the #construct) or you're just subscribing to a bioessentialist notion of some fundamental masculinity #that still protects you even when you aren't performing masculinity #like. stfu #i really dont know where these (almost invariably straight) guys think gnc people fit into this. chances are they dont think at all lol #and i love how he draws attention in that article to how often the implied 'insecure man' is working class and/or not white #because it's like yeah you're a threat in your struggle to secure power (and ofc marginalised men often DO hurt women around them in order #to do this) BUT the men who don't have to do this because..their power is already ultimate...are framed as the good guys #rather than. the even worse guys. #anyway as always compare butch masculinity with men's masculinity and you'll find masculinity is not just a neutral set of traits that #just randomly happen to be associated with men for no reason #okay anyway im done i dont care any more im breathing into a paper bag