#btw in these trying times every kind comment on my gifsets mean even more and make me so happy so thank y’all for saying such nice things | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

chaotickookmin · 5 years

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I don't think anyone said anything bad about Yoongs, just that they see the savageness as being more one sided which I also think it is. Even with that gifset it's like 80% Yoongi being savage. I agree with u that Yoongi does have a soft spot for Jimin but he hardly shows it versus someone like Joon towards Jimin so it's just not as obvious I think

I said “don’t come to my blog speaking badly about Yoongi” because I got an ask in which anon called him bully and other awful things, so I just wanted to make it clear that I wouldn’t bother answering those kind of hateful messages.

That being said, Yoongi can be a very sarcastic person who loves to make snarky comments, that’s just who he is and why we sometimes call him “savage”. That doesn’t mean that “savage” is his only personality trait; if you’ve been paying attention, you’ll know that even though he teases all of them a lot, he is a big softie for every single one of his members. And I’m sorry anon, but I don’t understand why you are trying to compare him and Joon? They are different people, they express their affection in different ways.

Btw, I don’t know what you expect Yoongi to do to show he cares about Jimin a lot. He has complimented his voice several times (he is quick to remind Jimin he is a good singer when he starts being overly critical of himself), has complimented his work ethic, has said Jimin that he loves him out loud and in front of the camera more than once, has told him he is handsome out of nowhere, has held his hand and hugged him several times even when he isn’t a very touchy person in general and more.

#Anonymous

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crossedbeams · 7 years

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Hey! I only really got up to date with all the crazyness today and just felt like I had to send you a warm hug and testify to the fact that certain parts of this fandom seem to have lost any empathy towards famous people, real people, tumblr people - well people - and they seem to not notice how their words are sexist and vile. One part of what I wrote before is still true, I think: That These people also tend to behave as if none would see each and every word they PUBLISH. (1)

(2) They appear to be caught in their own obsessions which btw seem to have nothing to do with the people they obsess over anymore. (Well you could argue that it never REALLY does as most of us don’t really know these folks in real life.) So yeah - before we can go to zen again - before I’ll go to zen again - I felt I should take a side. I wish these folks would also find some zen. By which I mean being respectful towards folks they don’t even know.

I know I sat on this for a while but I’ve been all over the shop on my thinking on this and I wanted to find some chill.

I tend to run hot on things I see that are wrong, and sometimes that gets me into trouble. I’m outspoken, forceful and sometimes I go too far in my desire to defend or protect those I love/my ideals/myself, and I get that public displays of “fuck no” are not for everyone.

I understand that for many, if not most, fandom is a place of escapism and bringing the ugliness of conflict and bullying into the light disrupts that, even when the purpose of publishing an ask or writing a post is to counteract the bad behaviour, and so it’s an incredibly difficult line to draw between standing up for oneself and perpetuating a discourse that has damaging effects to the fandom haven. I would never judge or want to shame anyone for not speaking up, for prioritising their own wellbeing over the ridiculousness of drama, and yet I have to admit at times I find the deafening neutrality hard to bear.

And that’s because I have felt, first hand, what it feels like to be the victim instead of the bystander. Tumblr drama is often an annoyance. It clogs your dash and interrupts your gifsets and that sucks when you just want a big dose of Mulder and Scully in your eyeballs, but what sucks worse is seeing a message pop up on your dash and feeling a sense of dread that its someone come to call you something unthinkable behind the mask of anon. It’s a visceral gulp I still feel on bad days.

Tumblr used to be my haven. It was a fun place, my first taste of fandom and I used to scroll for hours, skipping over hurt and hate because it wasn’t my business except suddenly it made me its business. Suddenly my place of fun was full of people calling me names, accusing me of lying, trying to discredit me, threatening my anonymity, my job, trying to claim ownership and spoil my interaction with Gillian. I still don’t really know why it happened but I do know that the result was, overnight, my relationship with tumblr changed.

My comfort puppy had grown teeth and the bite hurt. And the silence was deafening.

Luckily, I have a group of friends here who have stuck with me though it all, supported me on and off screens and often been damned for doing it. But if I didn’t have them, I probably wouldn’t still be blogging. When I read one of the various essays about why I was a terrible person who needed to be punished I noticed that many of the people who liked and reblogged it were people who, up to that moment, had been commenting and liking the fic I shared. They were people with whom I’d discussed life, shared interests. Months of sharing my life and my work suddenly seemed meaningless, how could they believe such vile lies, and just like that my safe space shattered.

For every person who messaged me support there was one who liked that post.

And for every person who liked that post there were ten who just said nothing and kept interacting with both me and the people hell bent on driving me out. In the midst of the hurt and the worry, this was almost impossible for me to comprehend. Was I loved or hated? Or was I truly so unimportant that my tumblr torture was just an annoying blip for people? Was I being unreasonable? The thing about silence is that it creates even more room for self doubt, and however strongly you know you are in the right, the vacuum of neutrality between hate and support does amplify the bad rather than the good.

Anyway.

I’ve rebuilt a tumblr experience for myself now where I feel secure. I have learned not to take the silence personally, found out who my true friends are and realised that honestly, the fandom don’t deserve as much of me as I was giving. I’ve learned to care less and stop worrying about pleasing everyone (which is impossible). I enjoy being here still, but it’s not the same as it was. I will never truly feel “zen” and that is why I find the people saying “shhh” when I do choose to speak up so frustrating.

If you have never had the rug ripped out from under you then please don’t “shhh” me. I don’t post to ruin your day, or to “stir up drama”. I post when I decide that my silence is a greater injury to those being persecuted than a weapon to the persecutors. And sometimes maybe I get the balance wrong, but it’s important to me that when the hate spreads out beyond the area that I have designated “no mans land”, when the irrational hatred of a few starts to be shared and seep into the likes and circles close to me that I stand up and say “NO”. Because I was lucky. I’m mentally resilient, I had support and I didn’t fall apart, and I think it’s important to lend that strength to whoever is next in line for the kind of crappy treatment I experienced.

And that’s all I really want of others, not a mindless bandwagon of drama crusaders to call on, but just the acknowledgement that your safe space may have become someone else’s nightmare, and that they’re doing their best to get back to a happy place. Support and solidarity and awareness of the situation, go a long way to help that process, resolve it faster and make it easier to forgive, if not forget what has happened.

Which I guess is a really long way of saying thank you for this message. I really appreciate it. And to all the silent ones out there, it’s okay, you don’t have to like my rants but maybe also consider not liking the stuff posted by the people who tried to burn me as a witch ya know? Be neutral but be truly neutral, and show compassion, your annoyance will pass faster than the effects of a stint as the fandom pinata.

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maddiebonanafana · 7 years

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Are you there Zumpie? Its me Maddie

Hi @Zumpie, I was just informed Im one of the people you like to talk about and link back to on your blog. I don't seem to be your favorite person to talk about, but it seems like you enjoy browsing my blog every now and then considering you linked back to a Neal gifset I commented on that had nothing to do with your side of the fandom. You have me blocked, I guess you don't like interacting with me, but you sure do like what I post, and you like making posts about me so thats kind of confusing because usually when you block someone you're done with them.

First things first, you have wrongly labeled me as a “bagelswanner” which I'm assuming is a Swanfire shipper, since thats what you refer to them as. I shipped SF for like...a few months. And then I moved on to tinkerbae and other Neal ships. Im kinda surprised you don't know that since you like to go through my blog and pick out my posts. So I should be a tinkerbagel. I would like to be addressed as such please.

Second, could you, I don't know, maybe stop assuming you know how I think and parading it around like fact? Yes I am not a big fan of Emma. I have hated her as a character for a long time now and it has nothing to do with her not choosing Neal romantically. You have said that I see Emma as some sexual reward for Neal and that is not true at all, I have never called her a reward those words have never been said by me. I have my reasons for not liking Emma and not being Neal’s “reward” isn't one of them. You've been telling people I'm some gross bitter person (lovely adjectives btw very classy) because SF didn’t become canon and I don't even ship that. I was part of that ship for a few months and I grew out of it and I haven't gone back to it. Im surprised you didn’t sink your teeth into the debate I had with Zoe (another person you claim to not like but love going through their posts) over me not shipping it.

Third, why the “dumb bitch”? What have I ever done to you besides not like your ship and like a character you don't? Yeah there may have been a silly ship war between us but thats kinda going beyond a ship war. Do you justify calling me that because I'm “dumb”? Ive been wrong for years according to you, is that where my dumbness comes in? What exactly makes me dumb or what Im wrong about, I have no clue, Im sure you will tell me. In a separate post that links to this one where I can't reply.

Btw, there are more scenes that prove Neal has done heroic things but I was having a hard time finding gif versions of the actual moments. I could have grabbed youtube links but I feel like most people would rather see a gif than open a link and watch something. And its not one gif out of the three that are heroic. Yeah obviously Neal wasn’t gonna do much damage with a sword compared to Coras magic but he still put himself in front of her and tried. Thats pretty brave. And the other shadow gif is of him going back to NVL, a place he hated, hitching a ride in the air after taking a bullet. I mean, I guess heroism is different for everyone but I don't see how those scenes aren't heroic. And your linking of the comment I made on the gifset, like that wasnt even discourse related I was just talking about the cute eyes Neal makes at Tink in that scene because thats my otp. That has nothing to do with CS/Hook/Neal discourse. You linked that and commented just to be snide.

Im probably just screaming into a void here, considering I'm again, blocked, but I know that you check up on my blog so maybe you will see this. Im willing to be patient, since I know you have other peoples blogs that you have to browse and pick apart, Im well aware Im low priority compared to your favorites.

I don't think we've directly reblogged from one another in like...3 years? I don't know if I said anything to you that uspset you, and I'm sorry if I did. But like you don't have to be this way, you don't have to bring out the nasty adjectives and the trying to humiliate me to your followers and anyone who will listen. Thats going beyond “i have x opinion about this ship/character”. So like I said, don't know if I said anything to make your list of blogs to post about, I fully apologize if I did, I've grown up and Ive realized the internet is dumb and none of this matters in the real world. But I know that I'm not the only person who gets this treatment, and Im just curious exactly what crime was committed. Because if Im a dumb, gross, bitter bitch because Im upset with how the show turned out and I like a character you really hate, thats not really fair. If something I said upset you, you can approach me and not have to resort to shit talking me behind a block. Im well aware I have made mistakes in this fandom, but liking things you don't and not liking things you do isn't one of them.

#zumpie

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