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funkymbtifiction · 2 years

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Aside from the feedback of "reactive type reactive type reactive type," I've been receiving a lot of feedback in my personal life lately (therapist, friends, family) that I'm an excessively anxious individual, especially in the social realm. It does make me wonder if people think I'm a 6w7 just because they're picking up on that sense of agitation, and if an anxious 5 would look different from an anxious 2 different from an anxious 1, or if they'd all look "6-ish" or like they have "6" fixes. Basically, what if we are over-typing anxious individuals as sixes?

Any type can have anxiety, which is why it's important to look at what 6s want (security), and how they get it (by being loyal, cautious, dependable, and rationally thinking through things before they act). As head types, they want / need to think before they do things, they are slow to offer an opinion (because they want it to be correct), and they suffer from self-doubt. "I can't do this. Who should I turn to, or what should I turn to (faith, superstition, self-help books, etc) that can help me get through this?" They move toward people, seeking solutions that everyone can live with, and are concerned with fairness while being skeptical of those in authority. There's a push-pull with authority -- rebelling against it, but also consulting it. If you've been around long, you might have noticed I will complain about various Enneagram resources as getting things wrong once in awhile, while still using them AS a resource -- so I have my doubts about them being completely accurate, but I also need SOMEWHERE to get information from, and so I choose a port in the storm to trust, until a better one comes along. Another 6 might cling to their upbringing, to their faith, to their family, or to their beliefs, as a guidebook of how to navigate life, since they lack self-trust. I would say the most defining trait of a 6 is loyalty -- to what they care about, to their family and friends, to their beliefs. If they are disloyal by not standing up for them out of fear or being caught off guard (because a 6 often tries to think before they act, and predict the fallout), they feel guilt from their superego for not being truly loyal. They are also reluctant to stand out too much, fearing it might make them a target. So it's less anxiety, and more specific fears -- of failure, or lacking inner resources, or being able to trust their own decisions, or coming under attack for some reason, so they think strategically to avoid it.

I don't really relate to sp/so either, despite not having the "outreach" or "political" tendencies of an so/sp. I don't relate to anything social being a "play area." Unlike an so-first, I don't focus constantly on dynamics or the vibe I'm presenting to the world—stuff like curating social media frequently seems exhausting and like a waste of time. But I do not treat anything social like a play area—socializing and closeness are extremely important to me, even if I lack the confidence to initiate a lot of the time. I look to "go out" and do something involving other people, whether it's work or casual, at least every day, because I know if I don't I'll eventually be miserable. I am overly focused on what others think of me.

IMO, that indicates social-first. Your top priority is connection and your reputation -- that's soc/s?. Connections doesn't have to be a social media account -- those are often superficial, when what a social wants is REAL engagement with REAL people. If you take it seriously, it's not a play zone.

Unlike what I've heard about sp-firsts, while I certainly value my independence and time, I don't relate to obsessing over it or feeling a sense of deep anxiety about it. Weirdly, because I think I'm pretty good at self-pres, I don't feel the need to worry about it much. I only panic if something sp-related goes unexpectedly wrong (like mold in the fridge, or losing something important, or having way too many commitments at once.) If I had to choose between a physical and a social crisis, though, I think I'd pick the physical one.

That sounds like so/sp. "I care about sp, but I'm good at it, so who cares?" An sp/so would be obsessed with maintaining their resources but not too anxious about connecting to people, cuz "I'm good at it, so who cares?"

#question #enneagram

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