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trust-and-jump · 1 year

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Problems with Reverse Robins Tim Drake again (he's evilllll) (not really)

I KNOW I SAID I WILL POST ABOUT RED HOOD ARC WITH TIM BUT I JUST CAME UP WITH SOMETHING MORE INTERESTING TO ME. /I don't even like Tim and still, I don't know why i post and write about him more than about Damian who's more interesting to me, or about Jason, who is my favourite, but NEVERMIND/

This is going to be bad. Tim is not good. He's not truly bad either but.. Nah.

Bad English and typos, by the way! But here's this dumb post- - - - - - - -

Okay but even after returning to the family my Tim still has very few limits. He admits to himself that he loves and needs his family and he welcomed Dick and tries to fix things with Jason (and, well, he did some pretty bad things in cold blood with Jason, but he did regret it after everything), and he follows Bruce's rules, trying to redeem himself, but.

But.

Just when things are starting to get brighter than ever - Gotham finally gets actually better and safer, Bruce becomes a human being, Alfred is no more a soldier in a war, Cass almost completely stops being a vigilante and tries to build a new life, Jason decides he should get a new identity since Shrike's darkness is no longer needed in their city and to their Batman, Damian is calmer and more relaxed than ever— Jason dies. Not gonna explain how because it's a long story and it's different from canon (bc Jay is more confident with his place in the family and Bruce is more emotionally open and he has a brother Damian who cares about him a lot and actually spends time with him) but it's still a Joker mess and he still gets beaten with our favourite crowbar and blown up and dies.

And, ah, don't get me wrong, they are all shaken by it (Bruce is Bruce, all his emotional progress being ruined, Cass is cold and uncaring and angry and feels she should fill the gap and be vigilante again even though she doesn't want to, Damian, after some time, stops talking, Alfred is distracted, distant, Dick's 'confidence in tomorrow' is under threat, he just started building relationship with others), but Tim? Tim's a desperate young man, and he clings to his family and he, not unlike the others, didn't have a lot of experience with family. And he's, ah, he still didn't learn. Dami, Cass, Jason - they didn't have much of a child hood, but Bruce gave him a little of it, just a bit, just enough to find out how to love and how to express it. But when Drake got to Bruce he still had parents and kept emotional distance because, well, Bruce was a mentor, a close teacher, a worried adult, yes, and "it's good to be with him", yes, but Tim had living parents, so no, no, no. And it's not like Damian was nice to him once he found out that Tim stole Shrike and Bruce let him do it. Then the incident with his parents happened and then, at the end, he died the same day his father died, at the hand of the same murderer.

Again, Tim's childhood before joining Batman was more or less ordinary. Yes, his parents loved him but, sadly, starting from a certain age, weren't around much. And despite having babysitters and going to school, it's just... well, you know the opinion that almost all kids by default are sadistic psychopaths a little, and what makes some of them so insufferable is that they didn't learn better yet? Well. I, for example, was a little psycho because I remember really fcking well how I couldn't comprehend very 'simple' things such as love and genuinly caring about someone closer to me, and why putting myself in danger can upset the others (because I didn't feel it). And you know what, maybe it was because my parents were working hard and i almost never saw them back then. i wasn't lonely or something, I had A LOT of people around me. I, like, knew i wouldn't really care if anyone of them died. I know, it's horrible, I'm not like that anymore, it was late but I somehow learned how to love, i worked hard on it, i woke up when I was 16 or so and it was so, so exciting to realize that I'm not mimicking feelings anymore, and that I now know from an experience what others are feeling. And i was learning and it was very interesting to actually know what are the emotional problems in my family and i started to fix them using my old knowledge and my new experience and it actually sometimes worked. Just. Wow. I felt like I'm the puppeteer! I was burnt by this few times but mostly it was all great. Sometimes I still feel it, when I'm not busy deciding if i should kill myself or shouldn't.

So, Tim is a fictional character, and he's, like, a genius, so it wouldn't be the same, but.... But.

I'm obsessed with Tim "failing successfully".

You know that thing when a grieving family often has that one person in it who's more ready than others to keep everyone going? Look. It's supposed to be Cass here, but she's 16 and still not good with words and she feels too helpless. So she does that, but... Ah, just, look.

So, like I said, Tim got attached to Jason, of course (especially because of guilt), but when he died, after the initial shock dissapeared, Tim was much more worried about others. Jason was dead, but others weren't. And their job is dangerous enough to kill them if they are not at their best.

So. Are you ready? Because it's going to be a shitshow. Not as bad as it could be, but definitely a Tim Plan™️. Not much of a plan but something like that.

How WRONG is it to use your youngest recently adopted brother to emotionally replace your deceased brother in order to keep your grieving family from imaginary collapse (because you are a sucker with the IQ of a genius but you are not able to treat the family object humanely), literally instructing this little brother about how he should behave in order to, quote, "save" the others, and trying to make him a new Robin (not a Shrike because nooo, it wouldn't work with others) in order to fill the hole left from the one who died?

you know what Dick should say to Bruce, you know when Dick should try to cheer up Cass, you know when Dick should be vulnerable with Damian, you know how Dick should spend time with Alfred, and you teach that Dick, because you're smart enough, and you understand now, and it terrifies you how everything seems to fall apart, how every member of your family is acting different and how something worse is bound to happen.

Oh, yes, about the question of who "you" are: you're a person who died once as a civilian and, after resurrection, got rid of the remnants of your flimsy morality with help of Ra's al Ghul; you are a person who worked for the League of Assassins for a couple of years by your own choice, and then, upon returning to the family and realizing that Ra's left you a 'gift' in your body, agreed to follow the Bruce's rules and redeem yourself for some of shit that you did to this family both when you were sane and when you gave in to Pit madness. And when everything just started to look good, and you even realized that you love this imperfect family, the bro you once tortured (while you were "on the bad" side) and regretted about it later, died, and now you see how bad everything is and decide with your stupid smart head that, in order to reduce suicidal tendencies of the head of the family, to return to the older brother something he could focuse to protect and care about, as well as to make your sister Cass once again be kind and gentle and caring/not angry to everyone, you need a plan for the emotional replacement of this deceased brother, who, it seems to you, was a glue, and your youngest sibling — (you should first get him out of Kent family where he was sent to spend a little time while the bats deal with shithole Gotham became again after Shrike's death and Joker's latest joke) — is the ideal option, being naive and selfless enough to do whatever you say, because it "helps our family to keep their sanity, see? Damian can talk again, Cassandra is at home more often, and Bruce finally started to come to his senses! Be patient, everything will be fine, you're doing great, it's almost done."

You're Tim Drake.

And... Two things.

This scheme worked, it helped.

Tim doesn't understand few things: you shouldn't try to 'save' family from grief. The family wouldn't fall apart without you trying to do it. Things would get better after some time. Tim is DUMB. DUMB. And Dickie doesn't exactly suffer but. It's just a lot. It's a very hard thing to do even when you are an adult. And when you're a child? Well. It's exhausting and it feels wrong to always behave around others exactly as you told to behave. And when it's suggested like a mission, and when Tim played it as the first step to be a bat like EVERYONE ELSE in this family, so you can finally help instead of just watching how everyone gets hurt in their nightlife. It's just. Wrong. Even though he's supporting Dick all the ways he can and spends a lot of time with him. It's still terribly wrong.

Guys, Tim is dumb here, sorry. He is clever. But he is dumb. I mean. He used himself like that in canon, but here he is a young adult (20-22 y? I'm not sure) and he knows much more, enough to do it much better. He would do it himself, would work hard to make each of them happier, but he thinks he's not the right person for this, considering how much shit he's done to them. He is wrong, because he definitely could do things better if he tried. But he didn't try. He just thinks that this plan with him would be 'Inefficient'. He is dumb.

AND ME TOO. I WOULD TOTALLY DO SOMETHING LIKE THIS IF I WERE IN HIS PLACE. I KNOW IT. OH MY GOD 😭😭😭 i know that maybe this whole mess doesn't make sence to some of you but i swear it does to me because I would do it. I would do it.

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mittensmorgul · 3 years

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So for the most part, I outright reject the finale. But I do think, in light of the whole "Jimmy was supposed to be in the bar, and Dean was disappointed by that because his perfect heaven would have Cas in it" just makes me all the more convinced that the final episode was some kind of djinn dream. Like.... There's no other explanation in my opinion. If Dean's perfect heaven was supposed to have Cas, and he tragically gets faked out by Jimmy (????? Why tf would jimmy be there anyway), it just proves that it's not ACTUALLY heaven. That, along with he El Sol beer he's drinking is all the evidence I need. I think after 15x19, Dean and Sam got whammied by some monster, and are stuck in a hallucination, and that's what we're seeing. (My headcanon is that it's actually The Empty doing it, because it knows if it doesn't keep Dean and Sam occupied and spinning in circles, they'll invade the Empty to save Cas. So its trying to prevent that) :)

Hello, anon friendo! I am gonna start by offering the socially distanced version of a high five, because yeah... There is just so much to unpack here, and you provided such a succinct and all-encompassing series of statements to start from. Thank you!

*flings open array of questionable suitcases*

First off, Congrats on having rejected the finale. I know a lot of folks are still struggling with that one, for many reasons. But you have hit upon so many of the points I’ve been trying to make about the finale since it aired. I’d just like to start with some of the assumptions I’ve heard from folks about the finale that make it impossible for me to consider it fully honestly canon. Because so much about it just makes no goshdang sense... like... not at all...

One of the biggest issues I have surrounding the reception of the finale in parts of fandom is that it portrayed a “happy ending.” The show itself spent the entire final season telling us that a gravestone marked Winchester was not and never would be a happy ending (thank you Becky Rosen-- words I never thought I’d say, but honestly and most sincerely meant). Let’s break this down a bit.

Starting from the assumption that “heaven was fixed” so that characters could have true free will there, making it satisfying in any way that Dean died so young and never got to truly experience happiness during life, I would like anyone who has adopted this attitude to then explain Kansas the band. I mean... explain that in any satisfactory canon-compliant way. (hint: you can’t. it makes zero sense in canon, if heaven is truly reformed and “happy” with everyone in possession of free will.)

Which brings me to Misha’s comments about Jimmy being in the Roadhouse. Why, if heaven were truly fixed, would Jimmy ever in a bazillion years attend a party for Dean Winchester? If Heaven were truly a “happy” ending for Dean, why introduce this element of eternal tragedy and heartbreak to his heaven experience? Why taunt him with the eternal loss of Cas-- even if you don’t think he reciprocated Cas’s romantic feelings, he was canonically the best friend Dean ever had, and being forced to exist forever in a place where he had everyone else he ever cared for except for Cas? Is frankly horrific.

How the actual fuck is that a happy ending, in any sense of the word?

How is this the sort of heaven that Dean would’ve made for himself before it was “fixed?” At least in the memorex heaven, he could’ve lived in oblivious peace with Cas, even if it was always just his own memories and not ~actually Cas~. I honestly think that would’ve been happier than the abject tragedy of what we did get, and what we would’ve gotten had the original script played out.

All of this kind of makes me wonder if they ever even actually defeated Chuck. Like... it feels more like Dean got pulled into the Empty at that moment with Cas and Billie, and everything else after that point was the Empty’s endless experience of sorrow and despair we knew it subject its charges to. So that’s one potential for what could’ve actually happened. I mean, everything about the finale was sorrow and despair, you know? Dean didn’t even get to enjoy his pie at a pie festival because Sam smashed in in his face. How is any of it happy, in any way?

Because if that was actually heaven, there wasn’t actually any free will (because why tf would Kansas the band have chosen to put on that concert? why tf would Jimmy have been there, just to torment Dean with the taunt of Cas returning to him only to have that hope snatched away again? It’s cruel. It’s, in fact, a source of intense despair).

The djinn theory could also work, and I’ve read some excellent fix-it fic using that as a premise. But that doesn’t really explain what happened to Jack (and Amara, since she was in there with them) after hoovering up Chuck’s power, you know? I think the simplest explanations in canon are that Chuck actually won via the unified power of Light and Dark being transferred into Jack and effectively using him as a vessel. With Sam and Dean convinced they’d won, they effectively stopped resisting Chuck’s story for them, and using Jack’s understanding of humanity and the Winchesters specifically, Chuck finally was able to implement a version of his story that the Winchesters would just waltz into without thinking it was supernaturally influenced at all. Going bigger and bigger with monsters and cosmic troubles hadn’t worked, but going so small Sam and Dean would barely even notice the influence-- even with the incongruous reappearance of a vampire that appeared in their lives once, for like two whole minutes 15 years ago, and an unsolved case from the journal from more than 30 years ago that John had never even linked to vampires at all.

At this point, I need to mention that I’m watching 10.23 as I type this up. An episode in which we confront the Mark, along with Death, and Dean’s despair, where he learns a version of the truth (but by no means the full truth, or even accurate truth in some respects) about Chuck’s Story, Amara/The Darkness, etc. That would unfold more fully over the next five seasons. And what was the case Dean took in this episode? Vampires. LOLOL omg this show is nothing if not horrifically consistent, yes?

So because of this, I went haring off through my own blog looking for a post I made a long time ago about the symbolism of how various monsters are used on this show (because again, consistency). I got sidetracked by other posts in my monsters tag, including this from after 15.09 aired, which feels particularly awfully relevant. This was my reaction to Chuck’s Story he showed Sam in that episode, about what the future would look like should he successfully trap Chuck with a Mark, and which... yeah is basically exactly thematically consistent with what we saw in the finale, right down to a cheesy twist on vampires. Read the whole post right here, but this is the part that reached up and punched me in the face:

this is how Dean personally reacts when he loses Cas. We know how he reacts when he loses anyone else– think about what he did when Charlie died. He went on a murder rampage against the Stynes for killing her. When Mary died he broke some furniture and went full bore toward both resurrecting her and stopping Jack. But without Cas, Dean loses the will to fight. Sam has… always been different. He referenced Jess in 15.04 to remind us of how he was after she died in the pilot episode. Just like John, he picked up the revenge mission and ran with it. But for Dean, Cas is different. Without Cas… Dean gives up.

Because... Dean gave up. Sure, he and Sam weren’t overrun by vampires in the end. Chuck knew they’d never stop fighting the monsters, one way or another. The only way to get Dean to give up is something Chuck hadn’t quite figured out yet... maybe not until after 15.17, after confronting Cas in the hallway of the bunker, after absorbing Amara’s power, knowledge, and perspective on Dean.

Chuck needed Dean to give up, and honestly? Pushing Billie to clear him off the table and send him (and Cas, that pesky angel who never did what he was told) to the Empty would’ve been a direct way to deal with that... pretty much akin to having one sibling locked in a cage forever, yes?

Also, still looking through my monsters tag, I’m reminded of 14.15, and still cannot differentiate the version of Heaven in 15.20 from what was done to the people of that town. This... is not... paradise. This is actively what Dean has been insisting is the OPPOSITE of paradise since like… 4.22… No ending where Dean was a “Stepford bitch in paradise” ever had the possibility of being “happy,” at the core of things, and this “fixed” version of Heaven just doesn’t hold up to any degree of inspection. Something is seriously wrong here. https://mittensmorgul.tumblr.com/post/183465650390/so-can-we-talk-about-this-monster-of-the-week-for

And since I was unable to find the post I wrote who knows how long ago about Monsters and how they’re symbolically used on Supernatural to represent larger themes in the episode, I’ll just attempt to sum up what Vampires have been used for. Revenge. Vampires are always, in some way connected to themes of revenge.

(and hooray, I found at least a post adjacent to the one I’ve spent the last four hours trying to find... https://mittensmorgul.tumblr.com/post/187207052080/i-obviously-did-not-think-this-through, where I mention that shapeshifters are about revealing hidden truths (mostly about Dean since most shapeshifters are connected to Dean), zombies are about grief and the inability to move past it.)

So why... why at the end of their road is the monster that comes after them-- literally FOR REVENGE for something that had never been blamed on Sam or Dean to begin with, from season 1, directly connected to John’s revenge mission and the first time they learned about the Colt AND the first time they learned in canon that Vampires were even real... like... this feels very specifically like some kind of layers-of-meta levels of shade on them, you know? Vampires are for revenge, so what vengeance exactly is being visited upon Sam and Dean in this episode? If not Chuck’s entire story for them itself?

So yeah, 100% agree, something is incredibly rotten in the finale. And I am sick to effing death of people trying to convince us that anything about this was “good” or “happy” or “satisfying” in any way. Or even “how it was always supposed to end” with Dean dead bloody, as if the entire back half of the series hadn’t been suggesting that a true win was the subversion of all of Chuck’s story for them, and Dean finally being able to have his chosen family all alive, happy, and chilling on a beach somewhere watching the sunset. Nothing will ever convince me that the ending portrayed in 15.20 wasn’t exactly how Chuck thought he “won,” rendering it entirely irrelevant to the rest of canon, unless all of canon was ultimately the tragedy we’d been encouraged to believe would be firmly defeated in the end.

Folks, you can’t have it both ways.

#spn 15.20 #chuck's process #if this was the 'happy' ending for dean they sure did fail big time to make it actually happy!#it makes me feel sick thinking that dean's happy heaven ending was more like an eternal pit of torment #like actively tormenting him and taunting him with the fact that cas was truly gone forever #like wow they went all the fuck out to make it clear that even in heaven #dean would never be allowed to respond to cas's declaration of love #like... it's the most hurtful and hateful thing the show could possibly have done to us #and it still fucks me up knowing there's people who think this heaven was a 'good' ending for dean #like... fuck that entirely and with extreme prejudice #i feel like i have not been emphatic enough about my absolute hatred for this episode in these tags #but sadly there are limitations to expressing the actual feelings i'm feeling in the english language #sometimes the only effective word for these feelings involves velociraptor screeching #Anonymous

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dulcidyne · 2 years

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Honestly, weird little gripe I have, but the aliens in Mass effect have translates right? But the animations sync up with English, so I'm hella curious as to what they actually sound like and look like when speaking tbh. Personally I think krogan bellow like frogs buts just me

Ugh, translators, OP you are so right, the more you think about them the less sense they make for canon and the in-game experience. I definitely understand the need to just simplify things and not commit to an alien language that is then subtitled for the player just to maintain the illusion that not everyone is just walking around speaking English. But I personally appreciate when media goes out of its way to demonstrate linguistic multiculturalism--it makes the world feel so much bigger and any game featuring aliens would benefit from that kind of world-building. In the books and the updated Bring Down the Sky codex update, there's mention of a simplified galactic trade tongue. I don't think this is what all the squadmates are using though, because I'd think it would be a bit limited for the breadth of communication used in the game. It's considered 'broad-minded and practical' to be able to speak without machine aid' so while Earth is linguistically divided, I do think that quite a few squadmates are good polyglot candidates. Liara, for one. Despite being anti-social, I see her studying all sorts of languages and probably picking up major Earth languages in her spare time just for the novelty and fun of it. I headcanon that for asari at least, the appearance of a bunch of new Earth languages spurred a whole trend of Earthophilia--everyone rushing to compare their proficiency in the various common languages. Samara (for the same reason), Mordin, Wrex (he's an experienced merc and he's ancient, I could totally see him teaming up and learning languages from humans just to know more unique insults to hurl at turians and salarians). Despite the 'translator glitch' comment from Shepard--even Thane for the same business practical reasons as Wrex? I have to think having an amazing memory would make picking up languages really easy. I think, despite his anatomical incompatibility with labial sounds, Garrus would be another polyglot--although probably less proficient than Liara. For one, turians had a military incentive to learn major Alliance languages during the First Contact War and they probably pioneered the initial translation effort. For another, he lives on the Citadel and his father works at C-Sec. I see the Citadel education system, whatever it is, highly emphasizing alien language development. It would be hugely advantageous for him to speak without translator aid to suspects and witnesses when he works at C-Sec. I also like to headcanon that Garrus is such a nuisance to Pallin, that by way of punishment and to sandbag his hothead tendencies, Pallin shoves him with every single human rookie to join the force and so Garrus has managed to pick up more human languages, turns of phrase, and gestures/facial expressions than most--even using them himself. So, it could be that Garrus is speaking an approximate variant of Shepard's native tongue and her translator is smoothing out all the missing m's p's and b's. Or maybe having the double syrinx (birds have syrinxes so that's what I think of instead of larynx) can 'fake' it pretty well. Either way, looking visually indistinct. I do like the headcanons I've seen where turian language meaning is highly pitch based with the subvocalizations conveying a lot of meaning, unbeknownst to the human ear. In the books, Omega is described as not employing any of the common trade tongue and being full of a ton of different untranslatable dialects that sound like a cacophony of squawks and grunts so the alien languages are definitely alien--we just sadly never get to hear them :( EVEN on Omega, how dare they. I love the idea that krogans bellow--they absolutely should! I also love most of the native turian language headcanons I've come across, the fandom has some really creative concepts out there! So in short, I think there is a headcanon that can fit with the game's animations--it's fun to me to think of Liara and Wrex busting out Mandarin every so often. But let's hope the next game gives us more linguistic diversity!

#mass effect #mass effect meta #garrus vakarian #liara t'soni #answered asks #Sorry this was so delayed!#AND SO LONG

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amindofstone · 3 years

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Match up, No. 9

@starlightbydaybright hat gefragt:

Hello! Saw you were taking match-ups and I was wondering if I could request one. Only done one before for another fandom, and I was wondering who I’d align with for One Piece ^^

I'm an INFP and generally an introvert, finding it difficult to express myself when I'm around people I'm unfamiliar with or just not close to. I can be both quiet and shy; quiet when I have no interest in making good impression on that person (a stranger I'll see once and never again) and shy when I'm genuinely trying to make myself acceptable to them. But, I do trust easily, so it's not hard to get close enough with me that I'll open up about almost everything, so long as they understand have my boundaries (that'll shift depending on how close). I'm also very affectionate with people I'm close with, particularly through physical touch, since I've been pretty touch starved. If you're close friends with me, you can find me constantly looking for a hug, but I can respect boundaries since not everyone enjoys contact.

The situation would be a bit different romance wise, since I’d revert a bit back to my introverted side, but also very affection-seeking at the same time. I say affection seeking as in I’d crave time and activities spent together with them, but I’d be afraid to ask/initiate, at least during the early beginnings of the relationship. I’d be constantly seeking affirmation of their love, and since I’ve never been in a relationship before (but desperately wanted one), they’d be constantly receiving my love too ❤️

While being an introvert in reality, I find it much easier to speak with confidence online. as I actually have time to contemplate what I can say. It's when I'm either with close friends or on the internet, that I can go on passionate endless rants or show my passive aggressive side. I'm usually pacifist, but if something irks me enough, I can and will pitch in snide/sarcastic remark or two, or if it's more serious; I will write out whole sophisticated and well worded paragraph that'd sound all polite with a hidden snarky tone.

I'm pretty much a hopeless romantic, so there's lot of couple things I want to try when I find someone. Back hugs, bridal carry, tickle fights, you name it. While I do enjoy these displays of affection (comes with the happy kind of embarrassment aka. I feel embarrassed that others sees it but I’m happy because I know they’re not doing it out of maliciousness and because they truly love me), small gestures are appreciated too; a gentle squeeze of the hand, a passing smile, etc.

As for hobbies, I enjoy reading, writing, (occasionally) drawing, but most of all; probably singing. I enjoy a wide variety of songs, depending on what mood I'm in, but I particularly like songs about love. Looking for someone to sing the duet love songs with me, doesn't matter how good or bad they are at singing. They can be tone deaf for all I care, it's the thought that matters 😊

I'm very emotionally sensitive, and can both laugh and cry easily. A random stranger online wished me good day? I'll be in good mood for awhile. Watched a 'mildly' sad movie? (Extra emphasis on mildly) I better have new box of tissue on the side just in case. It'd be nice to have someone that can either comfort me or at least tolerate my emotions, so I wouldn't be irking them 😞

I don't really have a type when looking for significant other but being an INFP does make the romance thing complicated. It'd be nice to have someone that's far along on the extroverted side (just not happy go lucky and can be serious) since, despite being introverted, I like to experience new things. I'm just too afraid to try alone and prefer it if someone else recommends it first. Someone to prompt me and nudge me to do something, but won’t take it too far if I really looked uncomfortable. (I’m also a procrastinator so they gotta find out the right ratio between pushing vs. taking it too far 😅) In relationship, I'd value trust and loyalty the most, since both are important in keeping the healthy relationship. If both sides could equally trust and be trusted, then there wouldn't be place for insecurity or fear. This ties in with another part of me being an INFP; I want a relationship that lasts forever. While it's weird to decide how long lasting the love will be early in the relationship, I don't think I can fully commit myself to someone, knowing that it'll end (through the other side falling out of love with me, finding interest in someone else, etc.) (natural causes like death are fine, even though I will still be sad 🥲)

As for appearance, I’m a 5”4 female with slightly wavy black hair that reach nearly to my waist. I don’t think I’m particularly short, but then again, every anime character seems to be straight up giants XD (Man, I was born with the wrong genes) I’m overall very plain, with black hair, brown eyes, but I’ve always been told I had pretty long eyelashes and big bright eyes. Average weight for my height, and flat chested :’)

As for the preference for gender, I’m mainly attracted to guys. I had some (very few) crushes on a small selection of female anime characters, but that were very rare, like 3, compared to my (insert large number) male crushes

Thank you in advance and sorry for how long this is 😔

P.s. I feel like I need to emphasize I’m still an introvert, since the personality I described is only limited to my very small friend group

a/n:

Hey there? How are you doing? Thank you so much for requesting. First off I should be apologizing for making you wait so long. I hope you´re not mad at me but lately there is a lot happening in my life. In my private life but also in my college life. But let´s put that aside and get to your request.

I have to thank you for the detailed info about you because that helped me to choose a match up for you so much. Like I instantly could think of someone. Not only did it help me to match you up with someone but also to come up with a plot. So I came up with this little imagine/hedcanon… I really don´t know what to call my work for the imaginies so I go with work. XD Anyways I really don´t know what to do at this point. Your request and your personality gave me such a good idea for a plot that I tried my best to keep it short because I decided to turn this request and my ideas and thoughts that are flying around in my mind to an actual FANFICTION! AHHHHHHHH. I can´t stop thinking about it. The idea sounds so damn good in my head that it makes me smile like an idiot right now! Uff I can´t wait to find time writing it down. AHAHH, but I fear that I already gave aways so much with this!!!! *pouts Doesn´t matter I´ll do it anyways. AHHHHHHHHHHH Thank you so damn much for requesting!

Anyways! Back to my work now. If there is anything that bothers you or you simply hate please make sure to tell me so I can change it and give you whatever you´d like. Other than that happy reading my dear!

Match up rules can be found HERE.

Warning(s): Maybe grammatical or spelling mistakes since English is my third language and I´m still improving in every aspect (Please have mercy on that.)

!!! Please do not steal my idea or work. Credit me if this is shared or published in any other platform or any other way. Please respect me as the writer and my work. Picture is not mine. Credits to: I sadly don't know. Please tell me of you know so I can give credits. Thank you in advance. !!!

· I decided to pair you up with KILLER

· Like am I the only person that thinks that he is not getting the screen time and appreciation he deserves? Because that is the damn case! ODA GIVE THIS MAN THE LOVE AND APPRECIATION HE DESERVES. And while we´re at it I wouldn´t mind if I would get a bit more of Eustass Kid too… Thank you in advance. <3

· But that’s not the point. Please dear requesting beautiful human being give this man and me, your hopelessly dreamy author a chance. Thank you, I really appreciate. <3

· aNyWaYssssS.

· “y/n? Are you still awake?”, asked the blond man softly. “No worries I won´t make you carry me to bed again.”, you said with a giggle. You couldn´t see his face but you knew that he was smiling. “I don´t mind that you know? I like having you close to me without having to fear to see you hid under the blanket for who knows how long.”, you rolled you eyes and hit his arms. “That only happened because that idiot captain of yours annoyed the hell out of me. That was embarrassing Killer.”, you slowly put one leg over the railing and then the next one. Making sure you don´t fall down the ship. “What happened? Didn´t you drag me out our cabin to watch the stars?”, asked the muscular man who held you close to him while making sure you didn´t fell. “I did but now I´d like to look at something different. Something even more beautiful. Something that gives me warmth and happiness. Something that keeps me alive and always makes sure I am doing fine.”, talking to the blond pirate while sitting at the railing was one of the rare moments you were close to an eye level with him. “You mean my mask?”, asked the man with a tiled head that got you to roll your eyes and hit his chest. “Great you destroyed the sweet moment. I hate you. Make a step back so I can get down. I want to go back to bed and drown in regret of dating you.”, you tried to push him away but he was obviously stronger and threw you over his shoulder. “Of course you hate me. That was also the exact same thing you were moaning a while ago. Let´s go back to bed nerd.”

· As sweet and loving your relationship was now with the pirate it also started like that. Wanna know how? Alright let me get comfortable in my bed and get started. Story TIIMMMEEEE!!!

· An island well known for their universities and scientist. An island full of top ranked doctors.

· Physics, chemistry, biology, astrology was well thaught in the schools of the island. An island well known around the world. An island ruled by a powerful devil fruit user.

· An island in which every civilian had a talent in another field. And you? You sadly had an impressive talent for languages.

· Why sadly you wonder? Well the amount of times you had to run for your dear life because some pirates could come and kidnap you and make you read the poneglyphs is immense.

· Once even the infamous Red haired Shanks came and asked you with the hope to have someone who could read them. But sadly you couldn´t. You told him that you were done with pirates coming for you or your best friends. You regretted learning all of that and hated yourself for that. Shanks and Beckman to whom your were talking to really felt bad for you and claimed the island as their territory after they had a chat with ruler and made a deal.

· That was that saved you and your friends for years and made you happy. You were thankful to the red hair pirates and always treated them with meals and drinks when they came visiting the island. You were happy for 5 years. 5 years until these stupid reckless pirates came.

· And now? Now you hated yourself all over again

· You knew that not every pirate was like the red hair pirates. Nice and respectful. They didn´t kill innocent people and destroyed civilizations only to get some gold and diamonds. But these? These were horrible. Cold and cruel.

· “Someone make this btch talk otherwise I´ll do it by cutting her into pieces only stropping when IT actually starts to answer my god damn questions!”, screamed a tall and guy with red hair.

· You were scared. Tied on a mast on their ship, you feared for your life. Screaming for help was not an option since you were already on the sea since a while now.

· The man that was yelling at you none stop was now holding a blond man with a mask at his collar and growling at him. The man might have a mask on but you somehow had the feeling that he was talking to the man with the red fur coat. “Clear the deck! NOW!!”; yelled the man before he left inside the ship. Slowly every man on deck was leaving you alone. You wanted to ask them were or why the left but you knew that they wouldn´t give you an answer. You were a prisoner. A captive. A pathetic human they took on board. With the last pirate leaving you behind, a door that was located behind the mast you were tied on closed while the need to cry grew inside of you. How long am I here by now? One hour? Two or three? Was anyone missing me back at home? Were they already looking for me? Thoughts that occupied your mind were blurring your vision. You were looking right in front of you but also not. Your eyes were wide open but your vision was back at home. Home were you belonged.

· “Hey. Hey can you hear me? Hey you alright, woman? Hello?”, a man was squatting in front of you and waving with his hands in front of your face. You were deeply lost in your thoughts that you neither heard him coming nor saw him sitting right in front of you.

· But the moment he touched you tight you screamed and got back to reality. “Please don´t touch me. Please don´t hurt me. Please I beg you. Please.”, fear was written all over your face. You saw yourself death with a huge puddle of your blood. “Alright I won´t touch you. It´s just that I´ve been sitting in front of you for 5 minutes now and the only thing you did was breath and say no. Anyways here is something to drink. You´ve been her for four hours now. Half of the time unconscious and the other one either basically mute or in a trance.”, the guy in front of you was the same one who got the mad man to leave and clear the deck. It made you wonder who he was that he had such a power but you didn´t dare to ask. “Here I hold it for you and you drink.”, the glass was put on your lips and you drank. You didn´t knew how thirsty you were until your lungs were wetted by the water. Finished drinking he put a blanket over your legs since the position your were in didn´t allow you to cover yourself properly. And the fact that you were wearing a dress wasn´t helping at all.

· “Alright. You had something to drink I got you a blanket now tell me are you able to talk to me and answer my questions?”, you nodded. “Good. Now listen to me. There is this language that is called Krisanasy. As far as I know there is a tiny amount of people who are able to speak that and you are one of these. Am I right?”, you nodded. “How well are you in it?”, you gulped and looked at the man with the mask “I know the most important basics. I remember basic grammar rules and a good amount of vocabulary but I´m not that good in it. I didn´t worked with anything that included this language since years now.”, the masked man nodded and fully sat down now. “Would you be able to get back in it if you had some books and scripts to work with?”, slowly you understood where this was supposed to lead. You knew that if you said yes they would keep you as their prisoner and make your work for them. And if they had everything they would kill you because there would be no more use for you. But if you said no now and refused to talk to him he would probably also kill you. You were in a dilemma. You didn´t wanted to die but also didn´t wanted to die after you helped them. They were criminals. Feared and hated by the government and any human around the world. You looked down on your lap and let your head fall forward so your long black hair covered your face. “Hey I asked you something. Would you be able to do that?”, his voice was deep and rough but in the same time soft and gentle. That irritated you. it make you realize that him being nice to you now was just a way to get under your skin and make you do whatever they wanted. And then they simply would kill you in the most brutal and cruel way. “Hey, woman. Are you listening?”, you felt helpless. “I don´t want to die. Please let me go. Please. I beg you. Please.”, tears were streaming down you cheeks you couldn´t hold back anymore. He came closer and lifted you face. “Listen here you are a smart woman. Stop crying for fcks sake. If I would be you I would have made these pirates work for me. Use your damn brain and stop crying. Do you really think anyone in here would kill you? Heck no! They need your help. They need your brain because all of them are basically stupid. Like damn I need you to answer all of my questions before my captain with anger issues comes and beats the sht out of me. Now answer me woman. Are you able to get back in it if we got you some scripts to work on?”, you nodded while more tears streamed down you cheeks. You felt pathetic. You felt worthless and used. Helping them would turn you into a criminal too and ruin everything you worked on. Everything the emperor did for you and the island would be wasted. “See wasn’t that hard to answer.”

· The questioning went on for a while you didn´t know for how long but you knew that a long time passed since the sun stared to set. “Alright. Now I give you two options. One, stay here. Tied up on the mast no matter what kind of weather we face. Two you swear to obey me no matter what kind of order I give you and you will be able to sleep on a bed. You will get food and tomorrow you will start working on the scripts we give you. You choose.”, with your head hung lowly you said number two and instantly got released from the chains and handcuffs. He helped you stand up and covered you in the blanket before he led you into his cabin. “Wait here. Sit there and don´t do anything stupid as long as I´m not here. If you do anything stupid I won´t be able to help you. Got it?”, he didn´t even wait until you answered or gave any reaction he simply left and closed the door after him. So you waited while sitting with a lowly hung head. Minutes passed and he came back. “Your clothes are dirty. The bathroom is empty so you can take a bath or shower. Anything you want but I´ll be in the room with you. Because of one I have to make sure no one is coming in and secondly to watch over you and make sure you don´t do anything stupid. Got it. Fine. Take this towel and these clothes. We don´t have any female crewmates so you have to be wearing with my clothes until we dock on another island and you get to buy clothes.”

· The man with the mask took care of you for the rest of the day. He took you to shower and gave you fresh clothes. You had dinner with him alone in the kitchen when no one was around and got back to sleep. And no matter what you did he made sure to keep a respectful distance towards you. Whenever he had to come closer or touch you to take care of your wounds he would warn you. The day kept going like that. Nothing else was said about the following days and the thing they wanted you for. Only necessary things were said that were needed at the moment. And you only gave short replays or only answered with a head movement.

· Slowly the day passed by and the night took over with the moon putting the world alight. You were back in his cabin with him sitting on an armchair and you lying in bed sleeping with one hand tied up on the bed.

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rreadsdaily · 5 years

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This week for #GetToKnowTheRosendeReaders, we meet Kelly!

#GetToKnowTheRosendeReaders has the only purpose to bring even closer the members of the RosendeReads book club. We read together every week but we barely know each other so every week I will interview one of you by choosing randomly someone on Twitter. You can find all the info about GTKTRR here. This week we meet Kelly from Brazil.

We can start with the first question: Name, age and where are you from? K: I'm Kelly, 35 years old, from Brazil

We’re some months into the new year so i was wondering if you set up a reading challenge for yourself ? If so, how many books would you like to read this year? K: Well, initially i wanted to catch up on the books you've read on RosendeReads before I joined and to finish some others I ended up abandoning for some reasons... but in almost five months I've read more books than in 2018, so at this point I think the sky is the limit!

That’s awesome, congrats! How did you get into reading? Was it something that has always been with you as a child or would you say it’s more of a passion you discovered yourself? K: I actually don't remember ever not liking to read... If some relative gave me a book or if I had to read something for school I always ended up reading it over and over again. But I only realized I was a Reader, with capital R, when I fell in love with a story I had to read for school and discovered it was the first of a series. It was then when I started actively seeking and buying books on my own. First the other books on the series, then other books from the same author... And the rest is history! A couple of years ago I had the chance to meet that author... I cried like a baby!

That must be such an experience, meeting the author of your favorite book! What’s your favorite thing about reading? K: When I read I can have fun and learn at the same time. I can scape from reality even for a minute or two, only to come back stronger. I can comprehend my surroundings even more. I can visit different places, whether they exist or not. As George Martin said, I can live a thousand lives, but without ceasing to be myself

And how often do you read out of your comfort zone? K: I had to read out of my comfort zone a lot when I was in college... But I ended up enjoying most of it. And I have to say, some of the books in RosendeReads have been a challenge, but I don't regret any of them so far! I also joined another book club just to keep pushing me out of that comfort zone

How did you find RosendeReads? K: I honestly don't remember! I know I started to watch the show around march last year... I guess I must have seen an interview or something where the club was mentioned. Then the first live I joined, you were finishing “Breakfast of Champions”

What’s the thing you love the most about RosendeReads? K: Sadly, my closest friends are not into books... So I dont have anyone to talk about that awesome story I just Read. But on RosendeReads I found place where I can do this and get all of your ideas too. That exchange is wonderfull! I'm not a very open person... I don't know how to express myself properly and you can add to that that english is not my first language, but on RosendeReads I feel very comfortable to speak

That’s really sweet and actually a lot of members feel you. English is not everyone’s first language but the fact that despite that, you challenge yourself is brave and amazing and you should never apologize for that! Do you have a favorite and least favorite book we read in RR? K: My favorite... well I just loved “To Kill a Mockingbird”, but I'll have to say “The Handmaid’s Tale” It's such a powerful book! Everything about it is good! The story itself, the characters, the way it was written! The least favorite so far is “Into the Wild” I was expecting a totally different thing, from what I've heard about this book and about the film too. And I know you all kind of hate “Catch 22″, but I havent got to read it yet

Catch 22 was... though. How do you imagine RosendeReads in 5 years from now? How do you see this bookclub growing? K: Wow, I just hope it won't be cancelled! But seriously, ideas like this are so important, even more in times like the one we're living. I think people are starting to realize that reading is important and how it is a weapon against all the wrong we are seeing in the world. RosendeReads and other similar groups will keep flourishing - fingers crossed!

Some livechats ago we talked about Hogwarts houses and i feel like at this point they should ask this question in any résumé so what hogwarts house are you and why do you feel like belonging to this one? K: I'm a proud Ravenclaw! I can't say I consider myself very smart 'cause that would be narcissistic of me, but since Pottermore put me - twice - on Ravenclaw, who am I to disagree...

Pottermore is never wrong One last question: do you have any social media? If so, where can we find you? K: Not that I have anything interesting to say, but if you want you can find me on Twitter: @cesarkel and on Instagram: @kel_caesar

#rosende reads #get to know the rosende readers #gtktrr

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