#catie.rambling.txt

[skitskatdacat63]

Fernando Alonso & His Relationship With Cards

I'm sure we're all familar with the cards on the back of Fernando's Vegas GP helmet by now, but did you know his relationship with cards goes a lot deeper?

I. Magic Tricks

You've probably seen or heard someone at least mention Fernando's propensity for card tricks. As far as I can tell he was doing them(publically) as far back as 2003 all the way to as recently as 2018. Even once performing a card trick, with a condom and a teddy bear(!??!?!??!!), in front of Valentino Rossi who said "How was that possible?"(x)

But how did this start? According to James Allen, "Fernando admits to having been heavily influenced by his grandfather, a mercurial figure, who taught him magic and card tricks, still one of his passions away from the race track."(x) And I'm not sure the validity of this one, because I couldn't find an actual source, but apparently he once said: "My parents are responsible for the two things I like doing most - driving and magic tricks. They bought me my first go-kart and a magician's kit."

In several interviews he described it as his hobby off track, and that he loved learning new tricks and surprising others in the garage with them! So clearly cards are pretty important to him both as a hobby but also to who he is as a person since they've been with him just as long as racing has.

II. Card Symbolism in His Helmets

This is the reason I originally made this post, but I thought I should also explain the origins of his card fascination first. As I said, we probably all remember the cards on the back of his helmet in Vegas, but did you know that wasn't the first time he had cards on the back of his helmet?

From 2008-2013, he used to have a pair of cards on the back of his helmets. The symbolisms of the cards themselves as well as the evolution of their design is really fascinating to me! Even more so with the recent development of the card choice in 2023.

Fernando said he wanted to reference his two titles in some way on the back of his helmet and after his friend sent him several ideas, he decided on having two cards(an ace of clubs and an ace of hearts, sometimes pictured with 05 and 06 on them as well), saying: "I picked the cloverleaf [the ace of clubs - Ed] to give me luck, but the only pity is that it doesn't have four leaves!"(X)

2008.

Here's the very first appearance of the cards! They're displayed flat, with the 05 and 06 clearly visible

2009.

Very similar to 2008, but with a slightly different design, and they're maybe a bit more straight with less shadow?

2010.

This is the first major change! I was sad they didn't have the years on them anymore, but then I realized they're sparkly to match with his signature lightning bolts on the top of the helmet!!

2011.

Honestly I'm still somewhat unsure if this is the actual 2011 helmet? It's pretty difficult to find clear photos of the back of helmets from older seasons. It's easiest to find them on replica sites or auction sites so I'm not 100%? But anyways, I like that this has the championship years on the underside of the cards

2012.

This is when I started getting weirdly emotional about the helmets. Do you see how they've progressed from being a centerpoint to being curled up and sad at the bottom of the helmet? Not listing the year anymore??

2013.

Same thoughts as 2012. And after this season, they cease to exist (just like his ferrari chair in the garage, WOAH CALLBACK), until cards make a reeappearance in his Vegas helmet, albeit in a different form

2013 Monaco(Honorable Mention):

For some reason 2013 helmets were easier to find proper pictures of, so I happened to witness this absolute beauty. The creativity of this helmet genuinely blows me away??? Wanting to keep the card motif, but making sure to incorporate it into the rest of the puzzle piece design?? Mwah! There was another special 2013 helmet but they didn't change the cards at all so I really applaud this one

2023 Las Vegas(The Return of The King):

The magnificent return! But look! The cards are different cards! Instead of being two aces, it's now an ace of hearts, a four of hearts(his driver number of course!) and, the, now iconic, representation of himself as a Joker. I literally could not believe my eyes when this helmet was released and I saw the Joker card, what a fucking silly old man....I really wonder if he felt nostalgic having cards on his helmet again or if he didn't think about it all and was just like, "ah cards because Vegas!!!"

III. Why Does This Matter?

*The rest of the post was factual, this is moreso my personal thoughts on the symbolism of the cards/designs

This post spawned from me recently watching the 2010 Bahrain gp and noticing "hey wait a minute...are those CARDS ON THE BACK OF HIS HELMET!?" It's a really tiny detail that's unfortunately covered up by the HANS device pretty much whenever he's wearing the helmet, so it's really difficult to spot! But I became fascinated with the fact that he had cards on his helmet before that recent helmet, and now here we are!

There's something to me about how the design of the cards evolves over the course of six seasons from the cards being front and center to being smaller, more folded up and closer to the bottom of the helmet. As I said, the 2012-2013 ones genuinely made me depressed because it feels, symbolically, like his hopes for getting another Ace are becoming more and more unlikely and falling away until they eventually fall falt and fade away entirely after 2013 and disappear for basically a decade.

But when they return? They're not the same cards! Instead of representing Fernando's championships, they now represent him as a person, displaying his driver number and his persona of being a Joker!! Though I do think it's interesting he happened to keep the Ace of Hearts, even though he talked more about the Ace of Clubs before. I'm not sure it's actually this deep in reality, but I like to think that it's him not letting his championships(and the lack thereof) define him, but rather letting who he is as a person shine and be the centerpoint instead! But on a sadder note, as @suzuki-ecstar said to me, maybe the Aces aren't there anymore because he's lost all hope for a chance at a third Ace entirely :(

#yes its finals week and im up to my eyes in coursework but instead decided to spend like 5 hours researching and writing this post #nah bcs i actually genuinely put more work into this then I think I have all semester dsfjdskjg #that thing about him using a condom and teddy bear in a magic trick genuinely had me crying with laugher. actual tears rolling down my face #<- HOW!?!? WHAT WAS THE TRICK?? its literally inconceivable to me what he did. oh if only there were pics UGH #anyways!! this post was a lot of fun to make!! i really really love the symbolism and design of helmets so this was a rly fun project #and i also went down a lot of rabbitholes while make this and saw many very weird articles from yore #i feel like i make an equal amnt of deranged posts abt seb and nando but i dont know why nando is gifted w all my well researched projects #<- i.e. chair post. that was the same level of research as this one but at least this one i could find actual sources about.... #idk theres smth about the extremely long history of nando's history that evokes research posts like this KLAJSLSKDJ #theres just so much that i dont think I ever really see people discussing! so i must create. #haha what was that joke tag i wanted to make abt my researched posts? I think: #normal posts that catie normally makes in a normal fashion #<- one day ill go back and actually tag posts w that. bcs the amtn of research compared to my actual schoolwork is so unwell #fernando alonso #fa14 #f1 #formula 1 #catie.rambling.txt #we do a little bit of f1

[skitskatdacat63]

"The body and face of this sculpture are in idealized youth, with plump cheeks and round face, and his hair is usually unkempt..his youthful appearance, large eyes, pouting lips, and layered locks of hair over his forehead are some of the iconography that can be used to identify him"

^ this quote is genuinely still fucking plaguing me. THIS IS LITERALLY SEB???? LIKE LITERALLY 2010 SEB SPECIFICALLY????? It is actually fucking me up how it is literally quintessentially Seb. Like big eyes...plump cheeks and round face...unkempt hair...pouty lips...okay okay okay!!!! And that Antinous is basically the peak perfection of pretty boy from that time, I'm like, yeah that's Seb to me 🥹🥹🤧🤧

But god the "youthful appearance, big eyes, pouting lips, and layered locks of hair over his forehead" Does that quote not evoke pictures like these in your head???????

I feel so unwell about it 😭😭 I am going through it 😭😭

#in march i think i compared seb to the david #which i still think is just as good a comparison #but this makes me infinitely more insane #bcs the david one was more just about looks and so is this one #but the fact that theres so many statues of Antinous and his image is so consistent and perfectly matches seb??? okay. #and also in that post i did compare seb to an antinous statue as well hahaha #but i think the statues i picked for the recent drawing i did were a lot closer #basically: seb is a masterpiece. a piece of art. to me. #but i really like making historical comparisons(as you well know by now) but gah when it fits so perfectly like this #it makes me emo for some reason 😭😭😭 #i think boy king is still my fav au and i always feel like a maniac abt all that historical basis #but this one just gaahhhhh like hes just a pretty boy 🥹 the prettiest boy #lmfao i come back from the race wknd and im like yep back to normal procedures: crying over seb #catie.rambling.txt #sebastian vettel

[skitskatdacat63]

I was showing my mom various eras of Nando, AND SHE SAID PUPPY DOG MCHONDA ERA LOOKS LIKE PUSS IN BOOTS HAHAHAHHAA

I'm not gonna be able to stop thinking about this comparison for a while 😭😭😭😭😭

#my mom constantly says things and makes comments that makes me wish she had a tumblr blog #you know actually if we're gonna keep calling nando a cartoon character #i think puss in boots suits him by far the best #but especially bcs of this 😭😭😭😭 #anyways my mom is so me fr. she only finds the older f1 drivers attractive 😭 #she said nando's linen outfit from today was hot and that hes the only REAL MAN on the grid #and i was showing her the other various dilfs and she got so excited at mark 😭 #im gonna bully her forever about how she excitingly pointed at mark in a pic and said 'WHO HE!?' #f1 #formula 1 #fernando alonso #catie.rambling.txt

[skitskatdacat63]

Trying to translate Seb's car names to Latin is making me lose my shit 😭😭

#some are like just yknow obviously the latin form of the original name #julie = Julia yknow #i wish there was a better equivalent for Kate than Catharina #i dont know latin nicknames :) #but some of these are so fucking funny 😭😭 #like the appeal of 'luscious liz' is the alliteration right? #so i cant just translate it directly and use 'elizabeth' #and so the adjective translation is 'praedulcius' #SO: 'Praedulcia Pru' HAHAHAHAH ITS SO FUNNY TO ME IM SORRY 😭😭 #way too proud of myself for this 😭 #catie.rambling.txt

[skitskatdacat63]

2009 Reference Guide to Seb's Hair(Long post w lots of pics):

I would rate these but I love every version of him too much so I cannot pick 🤭, I'll add some commentary though. This took a horrible amount of time but it was also a great excuse to download and show off a truly terrible amnt of Seb pics(I was in tears half the time bcs of cuteness agression)

0. Testing(Jerez)(February 10th-12th):

Honestly such perfect Seb hair, I find this soooo cute!!! His hair is honestly always so perfect at Jerez testing every season. I love the length and style, he looks so incredibly pretty &lt;3

1. Australia(March 26th-29th):

And now he is...bald. I actually kinda love this hair, he's my little kiwi fruit!! But I also can't help but mourn the Jerez hair. I'm just like: why did you feel the need to go bald, Seb??? It makes him look so young!

2. Malaysia(April 2nd-5th):

3. China(April 16th-19th):

I think the highlight of his bald era is how much he embodies the nickname "sunshine." Like the way his hair and eylashes glow in the sun??? Literally sunshine. Also it's cute to see his hair grow more fluffy

4. Bahrain(April 23rd-26th):

The texture differences are so interesting, I think this length looks its best when it's more fluffy like in the top right pic.

5. Spain(May 7th-10th):

It's funny how his hairline does that point in the middle, again: looks better when he looks unkempt

6. Monaco(May 21st-24th):

Weirdly shocked at how much his hair grew in-between Spain and Monaco??? Also I forgot that those fashion pics were from this weekend, and I was jumpscared by his mohawk look. I think he should keep away from hair product hahaha

7. Turkey(June 4th-7th):

Lego hair looking ass. Kidding kidding, just think his hair looks best all natural

8. Silverstone(June 18th-21st):

Lowkey kinda baffling to me how different his hair looks at different stages of the weekend. The podium hair especially is just soooo different, its very cute but yeah idk

9. Germany(July 9th-12th):

I did not realize he cut his hair again during this season?? Seeing these was very surprising to me, I had thought he grew it out for the entire season but I guess not! But I guess if he hadn't gotten a haircut the entire season, he'd probably have his angelic curls of 2010 by the end

10. Hungary(July 23rd-26th):

Kinda love the looks he was serving this weekend, it's just very spikey and cute(also the cunty sunglasses!!

11. Valencia(August 20th-23rd):

12. Belgium(August 27th-30th):

That garage lighting makes his hair look soooo much more yellow rather than his fair blond in the sunlight

13. Italy(September 10th-13th):

This transitional growing period is not my fav, just the way his hair sweeps in is funny

14. Singapore(September 24th-27th):

Looking particularly blond this weekend!! His hair is just very light and pretty

15. Japan(October 1st-4th):

I think most of these are from post-quali and for good reason; I love the way it looks like he has highlights in all the bottom pics

16. Brazil(October 15th-18th):

I love his scruffiness from this weekend!!! The scruffy stubble is sooooooo!!!

17. Abu Dhabi(October 29th-November 1st):

Pretty cute I think but yeah like nothing can really compete with his hair length in 2010 for me so I look at these and I'm like, ooooo growing longer!!

Conclusion: I think it's fun to get to see the process of someone's hair growing out. I've noticed that a lot of men with short hair get very consistent haircuts to keep their hair generally the same length, and I think that's so boring!! I think it's great to grow out your hair for a few months time because you get to see yourself at all the different stages and experiment with all kinds of different looks! So yeah, props to Seb for serving all kinds of looks this season!!

Also it's always interesting to me how much hair length/style and facial hair can change a person's look, but particularly how old/young they look. Like when he shaved his his head, it made him look so young. But in Brazil for example, with the longer hair and scruffy facial hair, he def looks older!

And of course, let me know which you like the best :D My favorite is Jerez <3

#i need a tag for posts like these which is just: #normal posts that catie normally makes in a normal fashion(not deranged) #this is mainly just ref for me #and for people like me who feel the urge to be ultra specific in everything they create #hope this was interesting for people who are not just me!! #i love how I originally foolishy tried to make this in one night. so naive..... #okay anyways posts i wanna make in this same vein: #more seb hair guides obv(guys idk if you knew but im very normal abt his hair) #id like to try and categorize all his 2009 and 2010(and before) helmets since theyre not on his website and i love them a lot #this would take a horrendous amnt of time but id love to try and make a guide of all nando's facial hair(hes had so many wild ones okay) #and then i wanna rate all the rbr race suits bcs i think about them *so often* and i have many thoughts #sebastian vettel #sv5 #f1 #formula 1 #formula one #catie.rambling.txt #we do a little bit of f1 #normal posts that catie normally makes in a normal fashion

[skitskatdacat63]

I do not edit *ever* so please don't judge my skills but I thought this song fit him post-race WAYYYY too well so I had to make it. For me. :)

#HE IS THE I-T-G-IRL #SOOOOO CUNTY THIS POST RACE MY GOOODDDDDDDDD #im hoping someone somedday will make an actual edit of him to this song 😭😭 #for now youll have to deal with my inferior skills #im so happy today #f1 has not made me experience this joy sincd qatar and then zandvoort before that 🥹🥹 #WE ARE SO BACK #f1 #formula 1 #lance stroll #catie.rambling.txt #normal posts that catie normally makes in a normal fashion

[skitskatdacat63]

Okay re: prev post abt ferrari suits vs old williams bmw suits bcs @sweatyflytrap asked

I hate how with modern suits, logos are usually just slapped on with no thought as to how it will coordinate with the rest of the suit. Ferrari is one of the worst examples of this, they're always just putting random logos on that are not at all cohesive with the rest of the suit. For this new one, their suit is all red/white/yellow, and yet they're like "yeah let's just slap this blue logo on."

However, on the old williams suits with HP logos, it looks sooooo cohesive. It's in a spot that's very noticeable and out front, but it's still very aesthetic! I think a big part of this is bcs the logo is the same blue as the rest of their sponsors, and it's embroidered on rather than just a sticker looking thing like the Ferrari ones.

You can have a lot of logos without it looking cluttered. But for some reason Ferrari is like, yeah let's put three small HP logos in completely different places, then people will certainly know our title sponsor is HP!

#after drawing a lot of mini race suits for the picrew i feel like im an expert djfkgk #but seriously drawing them as it went on was so annoying bcs the suits kept getting more and more cluttered #idk am i saying anything???? #i just love how beautiful that williams suit is #bcs theres def sponsors on there whos color isnt navy blue #and yet. #meanwhile ferrari is like: logo logo logo logo #catie.rambling.txt #f1 #formula 1

[skitskatdacat63]

I'm not even that big into webbonso, but whenever I look back at stuff like the umbrella moment, for example, it's like. They had to be fucking. C'mon.

#i have like two other primary ships so like not my top priority #but seriously some of the stuff is just. undeniably compelling #but no yeah i was looking back thru old posts #and saw the malaysia 2009 gifs and its like #they just hold hands in such a random way AND FOR SO LONG #every time i watch it i just cannot think of any possible justification #catie.rambling.txt

[skitskatdacat63]

😾

#Sorry guys critically unwell about him todY!!! #And the sprint hasn't even happened ugh #Well I'm fed #fernando alonso #catie.rambling.txt

[skitskatdacat63]

Hey, do you remember that really homoerotic scene from Skyfall? No? That's okay, here's a Vettonso version of it :)

- explanation & w/o text:

Hi hello, finally my weird psychosexual relationship with Casino Royale has come to fruition. Yeah this is directly based off a scene from Skyfall, but I def envision the vibe as being more like Casino Royale hehe. I can't believe I made that inspo board for this AU almost 4 weeks ago, and then ended up drawing a four panel "comic" about it. Ahhhh proud of myself, a bit, a tad. I think this took 20+ hours across the span of a week? God. Anyways I digress! The AU!!

First of all, their Bond song would be "My Way of Life" by Frank Sinatra. It's so toxic, codependent and obsessive, I'm in love with it. And it really suits Fernando and his motivations and outlook in this AU. Basically, MI6(in the context of James Bond) in this AU is an analog for Ferrari. It picks theses guys up, tells them that they're Ferrari MI6's most special boy, chews them up, and then spits them out when they're finished extracting all their talent and skill and life force.

Much like with Ferrari, Seb in this AU replaces Fernando after Fernando loses favor and becomes undesirable. Now Seb is the new golden boy, and Fernando has turned to a life of crime! Fernando resents Seb for this of course, but also becomes obsessed with him and the idea of him , and how they are connected. It's weird to watch someone else basically go down your exact same path and unknowingly make all the same mistakes(buying into the mysticism of it all too much, being overly cocky, having naive beliefs and goals, etc.) He is caught between wanting to doom Seb even more but also wanting to "save" him, by corrupting him and convincing him to work together.

Basically: He's both a Bond girl and Bond villain.

Fernando is in such a weird place in this AU. I think he's just very dramatic. Seb is just casually living his best 007(005?) life, and Nando is watching him with binoculars, whispering to himself: "DOESN'T HE UNDERSTAND THAT WE ARE NARRATIVE FOILS!?" Yeah he hates Seb, but like the song lyrics say, their lives and dreams are inherently tied up together. He would feel lost without Seb, because Seb basically, unknowingly, destroyed and then took over his life. Maybe he'll feel satisifed if he manipulates Seb into going down the exact same path a bit better.

About the drawings themselves. Still can't believe this scene is a real thing that actually happened, insane to me. But in this AU, after the events of these drawings, Fernando definitely kicked all his henchman out of the room, and fucked Seb in the chair. And then against the wall. And then on the floor. Hey man, Seb is already looking mighty delicious with his unbuttoned attire and being tied up.

I think the general plot would be that Fernando keeps trying to seduce him to the dark side, and Seb keeps making him think it worked, only to escape at the end of the encounter. Leading Fernando to just come up with increasingly more violent and kinky traps. Seb goes along with it(read: enjoys it), leaving Fernando satisifed, only to somehow escape and wink and make kissy faces at Fernando in the process. (Fernando smoking cigarette in bed: "How do I make him stay. Sigh.")

I like to think though that Fernando does win in the end, by realizing, ah wait shit I do need to actually explain my motivations to Seb. And Seb is so worn down by his job, not Fernando, and how he's being treated, that he listens, really actually listens, and realizes Fernando does really have valid reasons. And then they become evil crime husbands yayyyy. Wow you thought this was a espionage AU? Well it is, but just not the outcome you'd expect.

#ah well this was certainly a project.... #rn i feel like im devolving into illness so im glad i could finish this up before it possibly gets worse #this is my magnum opus as of rn. just bcs ive not really drawn such a longform thing for them!! happy w it :) #i think i def like the first one the best #it made me suffer so bad but i think i soften on my own art after a few days #like i finish it and know its 'good' but cant help but critique every little thing #but ive had that one done for almost a week so now i look at it and really love it #i was originally just going to draw that one only but then realized i really like the full dialog so. might as well. #generally i liked this though bcs even if it ws difficult. it was nice to have really direct and clear reference #like ah ik where im going w this rather than it being an image in my head that i cant represent the way that I want #ah anyways all my vettonso aus tend to be just wanting to explore specific dynamics of theirs #and this one is basically how i feel about their mutual relationship to the institution of ferrari and how it affects their dynamic #basically: THEY'RE MIRRORS!!! #there's always something to be said abt nando being resentful abt seb bcs of 2010/2012/etc and then seb taking his seat at ferrari #but then witnessing seb basically go thru the same trials and tribulations and failures at ferrari #and realizing huh wait maybe he's not who i was villianizing him as. maybe hes at my level too. maybe he's not infallible. maybe hes like m #a very bitter nando who has to fight btwn his impulse to ruin seb further or to relate to him and start to like him #so yeah that's ^ basically what i want to portray in this au(just like all AUs tbh) #f1 #formula 1 #sebastian vettel #fernando alonso #catie.rambling.txt #catie.art. #vettonso #bond au

[skitskatdacat63]

Everyone's comparing the Max-George interaction to Max's one with Esteban from a while ago, but for me, it really reminds me of the Seb-Daniil torpedo one 😭😭

#....red bull bitchy boys? #but nah this is my personal comparison #just a similar vibe of annoyance #catie.rambling.txt #f1 #2023 azerbaijan gp #max verstappen #george russell #we do a little bit of f1

[skitskatdacat63]

no because these are deeply unwell

#tumblr hates me and wont let me post on mobile today( i think ive spammed too much or smth and its cursed me) #so just know im so unwell that ive literally gotten dressed to go out in 10 mins but i had to sit down and pull out my pc to post these #like had to sit down and take ss from tha vid because my fucking god #please tell me guys im not just being delulu right?? like he is more captivating than ususal this wknd right???? #idk. i just dont know how to be a normal person after eveyrthing from today #gonna hnag out w my friend and only be able to think about THIS #HIS EYES ARE SO HAZEL IN THSEEEEE AND HIS STARE IS SO INTENSE??????? #fernando alonso #f1 #formula 1 #catie.rambling.txt

[skitskatdacat63]

Flavio....

#and how does he know that about him hm #kidding kidding kidding #some lines in this show i swear... #i have to pause and stare at the wall #catie.rambling.txt #flavio briatore #formula 1 #f1 #fernando alonso

[skitskatdacat63]

HOW!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!! HOW ARE THESE FROM TEH SAME DAY LIKE 4 HOURS APART!?!?!?! THE DUALITY OF MAN FRRRR!!!!!!

Why does that angle or devil post I made on Thursday keep being the most true thing ire ever created

#catie.rambling.txt #fernando alonso

[skitskatdacat63]

I CANNOT BELIEVE WE GOT NEW PICS OF THEM OMG!!

#ELLE HAVE YOU SEEN THIS???????? #also i went to getty to see if there were any more pics of them #and there wasnt but god theres so many silly pics of fernando hahahaa #THANK YOU ASTON #PLS CAN WE HAVE A VID WITH THEM TOO???? PLEASE????????????? #catie.rambling.txt #strollonso #f1 #formula 1

[skitskatdacat63]

Hello I've woken up and people seem to like the card post, yay! It's just funny bcs before I even was thinking about writing that post, @suzuki-ecstar and I were joking about Fernando becoming a Las Vegas magician post-F1. So here are some silly WIPs that I will hopefully finish at some point

Of course Seb as his sexy Magician's assisstant whom he cuts in half, also he would be so these posts

And his magician name would of course be: "✨️Magic Alonso✨️" Also I saw someone in the tags be like "oh so that's[the magic tricks] is where he got that nickname!" Honestly, I had the same realization, I'm so embarrassed 😭 I saw that it said Magic Alonso in the corner of the one vid and I was like WAIT THIS IS WHERE THAT COMES FROM!!?!?!? I didn't realize it existed for so long....

Anyways gonna go drown myself in coursework :)

#i suddenly feel very into writing posts rn. it couldnt be the looming deadlines right?? right???? #but aaaaahh thank you so much for the appreciation of the card post!!! yay lore! #but that was just the lore for this au obv 🥱 (kidding but its funny how they ended up evolving seperately) #<- like writing the card post i wasnt even rly thinkinf abt this au #theyre only slightly related bcs this au made me suddenly think about fernando and cards #a GREAT thanks to suzuki-ecstar for being like half this au and making stupid jokes w me about it 🥺 #hmmm what would it be called #earlier i said: #mid-life crisis magician! fernando #it fits :) #catie.rambling.txt #fernando alonso