#causw now PRESSNT me has ro deak with the consequences of PAST me and i want to kill her soooo dead right now

[puppetlooselystrung]

i cant evem go home until Saturday and its the worst thing in the world trying to scrape by and try to force yourself (and failing) to do everything you have to do like id rather just give up go home now tell my family i failed a class and have gotten a c in another class band will probably end up failing more classes and then haven them passively berate me and deal with the classic youre wasting potential and youve become wasted potential spiel ive heard since likw 8th grade and then take myself to the back of the shed on my own volition and be done with everything.

#univeristy has probably been the best yet worst decision for me in my liiiiiiiiiiiiife i want to kmsssssssss #its bad enough ive gotten so stressed lately ive had bouts of what i was told sounds like mania bc ive had two episodes of being like #im untouchable! im a god! you cant touch me nothing can! i have no consequences to my actions! i can do whatever i want! #and then not only get embarrassed the next day for how i was being the night before during this but them also curse myself #causw now PRESSNT me has ro deak with the consequences of PAST me and i want to kill her soooo dead right now #i have so many things to live for i know like yeah i too would like to continue viennas campaign but also like #the idea of having to face my parents is making mw want to kill myself as much as i wanted to the day i got news i failed a class #suddenly my plan of not making it past new years is making sense again 🫶 i was an idiot for thinking i could do away with it