#even though us writers found the subject matter to be cathartic; like hurt/comfort or angst- that sort of stuff

[deepwoundsandfadedscars]

.

#i am just. so emotionally exhausted about this friend group implosion and i haven't even talked to the person who it all started with #those of us who are sticking together were talking about it and how our formerly mutual friend used to handle certain topics yesterday #and then today that whole thing with the fic theft (I think i've mentioned that here before but whatever) was still tickling my brain #as it has literally every day since it happened #I was like 'yo fam can i rant about something else that [name] did that i'm upset about but can't talk to them about' #and they're all like fuck yeah spill it #so i explained what happened with that fic #AND THEY ALL CHIMED IN THAT HE DID IT TO THEM TOO #they all had very similar experiences with him that eventually led to not sharing new fics with him #or even talking about characters with him cause he thought he knew better for the characters #even though us writers found the subject matter to be cathartic; like hurt/comfort or angst- that sort of stuff #but he'd be like 'oh that's so dark i'm adopting this character and i'll give them a better life' #he actually said that to one of my friends #and yeah he rewrote one of my fics and then posted it on ao3 without asking me #so now i'm even more upset about this #he hasn't talked to me about this whole situation yet and i don't really want to be the one to bring it up first #i dread the day he decides to talk to me #but for now i'm just. not talking in his discord server #those of us that sided with the guy he blocked and publicly declared they weren't friends anymore have started a new server #and it feels much more chill. i never really realized how much it felt like walking on eggshells around him trying not to upset him #hell i didn't even know to what degree of atheism many of the other server members had been until we got out of there #another person is even in the same boat as me where we were both raised christian but dumped that when we figured out we were queer #and yet this former friend is self described as queer and all but still works for a christian organization who is very vocally anti-lgbt #he never wanted to talk about where he worked and now i know why 🙄 #and then he would post religious guilt tripping stuff too and that was extremely triggering #that was over a year ago but it still bothers me #whatever. washing my hands of him; don't want to talk to him again if i can get away with it #at least i don't live in the same country as him; let alone the same town like some of the others who've unfriended him #i'm glad others understand how i feel about what he did with my fic but it sucks that he did it to so many people #kee speaks