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aprilthearcher · 1 year

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burning red [roman roy x reader]

word count: 1.8k

[somewhat angst]

warnings: curse words, ooc roman ?, english is not my first language, not edited, rushed ending.

a/n: somewhat inspired by “red” and “false god” by taylor, idk i was just listening to these two songs on loop. i’m also supposed to be studying, but instead i wrote this, so enjoy! love me some greg sprinkles, couldn’t not include him. alsooo, this could read as being part of the same story as my previous roman blurb, but you won't have any problems if you haven't read it.

Loving Roman was complicated yet insanely easy, too tiresome at times and then incredibly invigorating. He had that effect on people, or maybe just her. Everyone else was probably too complicated for her to like. Not funny enough, not witty or smart enough, not loud enough. No one was Roman enough, not even across the whole damn world.

Getting him off her mind had been more difficult than she’d expected, probably because (Y/N) only realised her feelings for him after she couldn’t stop thinking about him. He had taken over her whole body without knowing. It was Roman’s lips she imagined when kissing blonde, ginger, brunette guys at pubs; it were Roman’s eyes she thought of when her friends would ask her about her favourite colour; it was Roman’s face she conjured up in her head when they’d ask about her type of man.

At first, she believed it to be some sort of sick joke the Universe was trying to play on her: discovering she had feelings for her long-time friend — one she’d known since they were in diapers, who would grab her by her ponytail whenever she was paying attention to his siblings instead of him (just him) —, barely two or three weeks in her first year of university, a university that was on a whole other continent, separated by an entire ocean. Still, (Y/N) knew she could fly back home in a couple of hours — “I’ll arrange a jet for you if you wanna come down”, her dad would always say over the phone —, but the idea of seeing him again with this new information in her head and heart (that couldn’t help but jump at the mention of him) terrified her.

Her mind would make her remember him and his antics in the worst possible times: while dancing with some random guy at a club, his hands on her hips, the cheap cologne contrasting the rich scented one Roman couldn’t get enough of. On a first date, set up by her friends who believed she had to let go of this “prude” behaviour and just let someone take her to their bed. When joking with the guys that approached her and her friends at the bar, knowing exactly what Roman would think of them, the cruel comments he’d throw, the silly faces. The soft eyes when they were both too drunk to even speak a coherent sentence, although most times nothing was coherent with Roman. She had tried looking for those same bright eyes; once more, she ended up disappointed. None of them were Roman. None of them ever will be, no matter how much (Y/N) tried to shape them into a replica of him. All of Roman was unique.

Hence, the dreadful turmoil inside her stomach once Shiv, with some tint of malice in her eyes directed at Roman, introduced her to Tabitha. “Roman’s companion”, she’d said. The blonde, curly haired woman greeted (Y/N) with an eager smile on her face. She said her name at the same time both of them shook hands. A voice inside her head told her this was all wrong. How long? Where did it happen? Why? Why? Why now that she was back?

“Oh, you don’t need to tell me your name,” Tabitha mentioned playfully, a short roll of her eyes a second later. “You’re all Roman’s been talking about lately”.

“Only lately?” Shiv laughed, taking a sip from her glass she focused her eyes on Roman , then (Y/N). “Roman’s always talking about (Y/N). I mean, he was practically her lap dog when they were children.”

“Oh, fuck off Siobhan,” Roman bark back.

“Well, he only mentioned you as of now.” The knot in her stomach tightened. The worst part was she could see Tabitha hadn’t said it out of spite, nor jealousy, but as a fleeting comment to add something more to the conversation.

He hadn’t mentioned her to Tabitha? Not even once? She had tried everything to block him out of her head, to keep him out of her dreams and fantasies; to catch herself every time she was going to bring up him in a conversation again, and he didn’t say her name until he found out (Y/N) was coming back to New York? What kind of sick fuck was he? What kind of sick fuck was she, devoting probably her whole life to Roman fucking Roy?

“Oh,” (Y/N) managed to croak out before her father appeared beside her and whispered in her ear that she should spend some time chatting with the other guests.

* * *

Cousin Greg was great company, quite weird before you took in the awkwardness that seemed to surround him and make him stick out like a sore thumb in the midst of all these old, rich people, but great nonetheless. He had asked her about her years in London, what she studied and what she did for fun, her friends and hobbies. (Y/N) found herself enjoying the night, sitting on a couch by his side, meanwhile both of their cheeks were getting rosier and rosier with every new cup of alcohol brought to them. Greg was in the middle of telling her about how he had screwed up the first day at his job on one of the parks owned by Waystar, cracking up from time to time from how she tried to hide her laugh in order to keep the attention away from them, when two hands settled on his shoulders, hard and making a noise that was apparent that the gesture was meant to at least hurt him a little. Roman was behind him with a clench jaw and big, maniac eyes.

“Greeeg, I think Tom was looking for you, man”.

“Oh, really?” Greg turned his upper body in Roman’s direction, which from the side looked somewhat weird because of his tall, lanky form. “Because, because I just saw him and he didn’t say anything”.

“Yes, oh really, man. And he said if you didn’t go talk to him right now, he would fire your sorry ass”.

Greg was on his feet quicker than she'd expected after seeing him drown glass after glass with her. He towered over her for a moment, saying a quick “see you later” before going in search of Tom.

“You’re mean, Roman”.

“Yeah, well, tell me something I don’t fucking know”.

They fell silent for a second. Around them, people were still in mindless conversation, setting down empty cups on the waiter’s tray while picking up new ones from another one. Alcohol seemed to be the only way to survive a family gathering at the Roy’s, even a harmless one.

“You wanna get out of here?” Roman asked. She turned her head to the right to face him, he was already looking at her. His eyes no longer had the maniac fog blurring them, there was now a tranquil pool of honey.

***

“My dad is probably gonna be mad if he finds out I ditched the party”.

“Please, (Y/N), since when did you become such a goody two shoes?” Roman leaned against the railing of the terrace, following her with his eyes while she approached him and finally set her elbows on top of the banister. From this position, he looked taller. “Don’t tell me you were like this in London. I mean, with no one to hover over you, you sure had a looot to do, didn’t you?”

“I went to London to study, remember? Not to go out and get drunk every night.”

“Well, I’m sure if you had been with me, you could’ve done both.”

“Yeah, probably, but you weren’t with me.”

“Whose fault is that, huh?” He crossed his arms over his chest. Her eyebrows raised.

“Are you saying it was my fault? We haven’t seen each other for how long and it was all my fault?”

“Why are you acting like it isn’t? It literally is, (Y/N), you left m.. you left and, and you never came back.” He had walked a few steps away from her.

“It’s not like you couldn’t have visited, Roman. Just ask daddy for one of his jets, it’s literally that easy.”

“Yes, but - but you left, (Y/N). You left, and it’s not like you chose some university a state away, you chose one a whole continent away! That’s got to mean something!”

“As if Roman fucking Roy couldn’t get one goddamn plane and fly over to London!” She had abandoned her previous position, now fully facing Roman, who was still a couple of feet away, getting closer to the door. He was trying to run, just like it he always did whenever they fought.

“I didn’t - I didn’t want you to get annoyed by me! To realise what a true moron I was. Then you barely talked to me after you arrived at your fancy university and - and started your very difficult subjects.”

(Y/N) closed her eyes in confusion for a moment. Though it was easier to throw everything at him, (Y/N) knew that she was also responsible for their lack of communication over these last years.

Only the bustling, almost never-ending nightlife of New York could be heard. Her chest hurted, her eyes would fill with tears at any point now. She was tired and drunk, and just fucking missed Roman too much for them to be fighting the first night she was back in the city.

“Now you are not saying anything?” Roman broke the silence. He was closer to the door, she noticed. “You know what? Fuck you, (Y/N). Fuck you for making feel all this – all this fucking, fucking shit!”

“What fucking shit?” She asked quietly, desperate for an answer, the answer.

“I - I don’t know what fucking shit, just shit, okay?”

“Say it.”

Roman didn’t respond, instead he turned her back on her, walking towards the door. Before he could reach the handle, she screamed at him.

“Fucking say it, Roman.”

“I’ve just told you, I don’t know. It’s just shit, okay? All of it,” he screamed back, opening up his arms, exaggerating his point. “I - I run out of breath and then my chest is all funny, and and I hate seeing you laughing with fucking Greg of all people. It’s shit, fucking shit!”

Drawing closer to him, she tested his limits. He was breathing hard from all the screaming and moving around the terrace to put distance between them, but he didn’t stop when (Y/N) got so close their bodies were almost touching. It was her with whom physical closeness wasn’t a problem, he always told himself it was because of how close they were pretty much their whole lives.

They only looked at each other for a few moments, the waves of conflict had calmed down fast and efficiently enough that for anyone else it would seem like nothing had happened between them.

Roman wished — deep, deep down — that they could stay like this forever, without having to go back and confront his family, especially his father; that they could make this terrace, above Logan’s place ironically enough, a little haven, only for them; that they would never be found.

#roman roy x reader #succession #succession x reader #roman roy

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sweetpeaownsmyheart · 4 years

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Just a Couple of Notes (Sweet Pea x Reader)

Hello friends! Sorry for the inactivity, I've had a lot going on and have been dealing with mental health but I haven’t forgotten you! I was so happy to come on today and find that someone has messaged me a request, my first one yay - so I should get that out soon! This is a lil idea I had late one night, I didn’t really know I was going with it but wanted to get something out and actually kinda like it!! (just a warning bc the plot is a bit naff lol) Love you all sm - stay safe and healthy xxx <3

Word Count - 2300

Warnings - umm not that I can think of! An odd plot maybe? Too fluffy? Very OOC Pea?

Summary - you write notes to SP when you start work at Pops, it’s not long before he responds. But then there’s a bump in the road!!

-----

You're move to Riverdale was a quick decision made by your parents in Autumn when a new job opportunity arose. Within a week you were packed up and moving to the town leaving behind your friends, other family members and the quiet life you had gotten used to.

Riverdale was an odd place to you. You were used to the comforts and quirks of your hometown and for that reason your attention felt drawn to the awkwardness and divide and, what seemed to be lurking beneath the surface in your new neighbourhood.

It was about a week after your move that you had noticed the 'help wanted' sign in the window of Pops and were pushed to apply by Jughead who you had met the first night you had come to town. Besides Jug, you kept yourself to yourself, limiting your interactions to with your family and customers. Of course, it wasn't for others lack of trying, often Betty or one of Jughead's other friends would talk to you. However, you knew that when you were old enough, you would move back to your hometown so didn't want to create too many ties.

That all changed when Sweet Pea started frequenting the diner.

He had come in asking for Jughead before noticing him in the corner and hurrying over. The way he sat with his shoulders hunched over and stony expression was intriguing to you, but you were quick to learn that he was as much of a 'mystery' as you were.

He always wore black in some way, had dog-tags round his neck that you longed to wrap your hand around and a curl on his forehead that you wanted to push back into place. If it wasn't for the few times that you saw him with Fangs and Toni, you would have thought him incapable of feeling joy but the way his face broke into a smile and his laugh carried across the diner was enough to make anyone's heart beat faster.

You were smitten with a boy you didn't know, the boy who was pegged as 'trouble' by Jughead when you asked about him.

Soon your want to know him overtook your want to keep to your solitude and that was when the notes started - that way you could still keep him at a distance.

-----

It was around 8pm on a Sunday that the first instance happened as Sweet Pea came to pay for his groups dinner. You had heard him complaining earlier that evening about how his English teacher was going to fail him if he didn't pass his next test with flying colours and you had subsequently spent your break writing out quotes from the book Jug had mentioned they were studying and exam tips you had found on google.

You passed the napkin to him along with his receipt and quickly left to serve another group (and avoid any embarrassment) missing the look on confusion on his face.

As you finished serving the table you turned back around you met his gaze as he reached the door. He threw you a quick wink and walked out leaving you standing with your heart racing and head spinning.

-----

For you it became common place after that day. Whenever Pea visited the diner, he left with a little note on a napkin that you wrote on your break. The notes ranged from help with school when you had overheard he was struggling to random facts you found or occasionally a cheesy pick up line. If you plucked up the courage to look, you often saw him smiling down at the notes when he thought no one was looking which made it worth it. You didn't expect a response, but it was something fun to do, and although the thought crossed your mind that maybe he it was making him feel awkward, he hadn't told you to stop so you continued.

He didn't respond, until one day he did.

You had just closed up for the night and were cleaning the tables when you noticed a napkin on the table where he had been sitting. You had given him a list of songs to listen to that day, slipped it onto the table as they paid and you hadn't seen anything then so were wondering if Sweet Pea had thought it odd and left the note but as you approached you saw the writing was not as light as yours. It had more of a scrawl to it.

'Don't walk home over the bridge today - Sweet Pea

PS. I like (your favourite band) and I like getting these notes :)'

And that's how your interactions were from that point onwards, he gave you a warning or a place to stay away from and sometimes something personal about him and you gave him a fact or compliment or anything you could think of. It wasn't much but it suited you both and you had had a few conversations with Toni and Fangs about how much he liked you and now a bigger part of you wanted to stay.

That was until Josie came along.

You had met Josie before, a couple of times, but your conversations were always limited to taking her order and the general waitressing 'stuff'. She seemed nice enough, but you hadn't seen her with a serpent before and since you were home schooling you didn't even know she knew them (besides Jug).

She sat with Pea for hours. Just the two of them. They spoke in whispers and you often caught at least one of them sending you quick glances. You did not want to infringe on them so let one of the other waitresses serve them both ignoring her questions on why there was a sudden change.

You thought back to all the longing looks, all the flirting both in notes and over your waitressing and of the fact it all was or at least seemed reciprocated.

That was the first time since you had first served him that he left without a note.

-----

He didn't come in again for another week or so. Everything was getting on top of you and your plan to move back 'home' was once again in your mind despite weeks of not speaking to your 'friends' or thinking of your life before Riverdale.

You felt odd. You knew that you had no ties to this place besides Jug but one part of you thought your plans to move away were based on the actions of Sweet Pea rather than your lack of connections.

You knew that you had no real relationship with the boy, it was only notes passed back and forth. You couldn't claim to know him or be his friend as you hadn't exactly spoken much but one part of you felt drawn to him and hurt that he didn't feel that too - he would rather step out with Josie.

If looks could kill, in that moment, both Sweet Pea and Jughead would be dead from each other’s stares. Jug was your confidant on all Sweet Pea matters. He had listened to you gush about how adorable Sweets was and in the last week had listened to your complaints. He knew that the actions of Sweet Pea may drive you to leave and he desperately did not want you to leave.

So here in the diner at 11pm, glares were thrown towards Pea by Jug who was sat with you whilst you were on your break. And glares were thrown right back in his (or your?) direction by Sweet Pea who had settled in a booth by himself.

You were the only one working that night so knew that you would have to serve him eventually so as your break ended, and Jug left the diner you walked over to him.

'what can I get you?' you said breaking the unsettling silence.

'Just the usual please.'

'And what would that be?' You knew his order. Of course you did. But part of you felt spiteful and hurt and you wanted him to feel that too. But you regretted it immediately when he turned to you with a look of sadness on his face.

'Come on Y/N. You know my order. I've only not been in for a week.' Maybe he was trying to joke to get rid of the tension.

'Yeh maybe I do and maybe in the week you've been MIA, you've forgotten that we don't serve food after 11. So, I'll ask again, what can I get you?'

'Just a chocolate shake please.'

You walked off to make the drink but were pulled back by a strong hand and a falsely strong voice. 'When were you going to mention in one of you notes that you're dating Jughead Jones?'

You scoff. 'When were you going to mention you're dating Josie McCoy?' You pulled your arm out of his grip. And turned to look at him. He looked confused. 'Yanno Sweet Pea, you were here last week with her? Has your memory gone?'

'I'm not dating her.' He splutters out.

'You know what Sweet Pea; I don't care who you're dating or not dating. It was only a couple of notes between us. So, I'll just go make your shake and you can sit here if you want or leave if you would prefer. And when you come back next week I won't be here.' You leave to make his shake but when you come back, he is not there, but a napkin is in his place.

'Sorry - SP'

-----

A couple of days later you were packing all your bags in the back of a rented pickup truck, ready to take a long road trip back to your hometown with Jughead. When he arrived, you said goodbye to your family and jumped in the passenger’s seat, Jug had agreed to take the first shift.

You made light conversation and sung along to the radio for about 20 minutes before you noticed that Jug was taking a wrong turning.

'You're going the wrong way.'

'Y/N, please don't hate me. He made me do this.'

'Okay Jug, what's going on, you're scaring me.'

'You know you said that Josie and Sweet Pea had been in Pops? Well, it's not what it seems. Just listen to him yeh?'

'Jughead Jones where am I?' He guided you out of the truck and led you down a path into what appeared to be a small forest. 'you better not be murdering me Jones.' You joked. 'I was going to road trip with you and all.' He rolled his eyes and remained silent.

He had led you to a clearing, told you to wait there and then ran off.

'Jones.' you shouted. 'Jones, come back here. Stop messing this isn't funny.'

'Did you know that the inventor of the frisbee was cremated and turned into a frisbee when he died.'

You jumped and turned around, shocked at the new voice in the quiet forest. 'Sweet Pea? What are you doing here?'

'Did you know that 12 bodies were found in Benjamin Franklin’s basement? You wrote that when i was studying for History.' You looked down and saw in his hands a pile of papers. Napkins.

'Here's one of my favourites - Do you know how much a polar bear weighs? Enough to break the ice. I'm Y/N. That was one of the first notes you gave me, remember?' You nod. 'Well thing is, it was never 'only a couple of notes' to me. I really like you, or I think I like you from what you've said about yourself in the notes. Just tell me now, did I read it wrong? I know you're leaving, I just wanted you to know.' His voice remained strong throughout, but his eyes did not hold the same confidence.

'What about Josie?'

'What about Jughead?' he retorts but quickly breaks into a smile and shows he was joking. 'Me and Josie aren't a thing. We used to be. I really liked her, but she didn't like me and then last week she came and told me that she suddenly did. But I told her I have a thing for this amazing girl who knows too many pickup lines and facts about dinosaurs.'

'really?'

He cleared his throat and looked down at a piece of paper he pulled out of his pocket. 'do you have a band aid?' you look at him confused. 'because i scraped my knee falling for you.'

You break out in a smile and walk closer to him, reaching out to his hands and then running yours up his arms and resting them on his shoulders 'Maybe let's leave the pickup lines to me. What google search found you that one?'

He pulled you closer and wrapped his other hand around your waist. 'I searched -how to get the pretty, witty, lovely waitress to fall for me-.' You giggled and brought your hand to rest on his cheek. You saw pure adoration in his eyes and hoped he saw the same in yours. You lent in and gently placed your lips on his in a quick and innocent kiss. When you pulled back and opened your eyes, he was smiling the brightest smile.

A question came into your mind as you noticed all the napkins strewn across the floor, you looked up with him through your lashes with your head tilted and asked. 'Did you really keep all my notes?'

'Like I said Princess, they are more than just notes to me.'

You felt complete and knew that in a couple of hours you would be unloading all your stuff again back in Riverdale because there really was something to stay for.

#sweet pea imagine #sweet pea x reader #riverdale x reader #riverdale imagine #riverdale one shot #riverdale fanfiction #riverdale #sweet pea #riverdale sweet pea #sweet pea fanfiction #sweet pea one shot #sweet pea x you #sweet pea x y/n #riverdale x you #sweet pea fluff #riverdale fluff #My writing

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starliightxo · 4 years

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✨ Holly Discography & OOC Meanings ✨

Storytelling = songs not written about her life but a story she made up

Red

1. State Of Grace ~ for Haley

2. Red ~ (Storytelling) Comparing love and emotions to colours

3. Treacherous ~ Park

4. I Knew You Were Trouble ~ Park

5. All Too Well ~ Adrian

6. 22 ~ Just a feel good, having fun song

7. I Almost Do ~ Adrian

8. We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together ~ (Storytelling) just a catchy get stuck in your head song, are specifically to be a single to get attention

9. Stay Stay Stay ~ Adrian

10. The Last Time ~ (storytelling) but in a way it's about her parents and begging them to put her first when it comes to them taking Haley. Because they never considered her in all their choices and it broke her.

11. Holy Ground ~ Adrian

12. Sad Beautiful Tragic ~ Adrian

13. The Lucky One ~ Herself discovering that starting to be known and fame isn't exactly what people expect

14. Everything Has Changed ~ (storytelling)

15. Starlight (co-written with Soraya) ~ for Soraya

16. Begin Again ~ meeting Adrian again after the 4 year gap

17. The Moment I Knew ~ a birthday she spent just after she had Haley and longing for Adrian to come back even though she knew her parents wouldn't have even let him through the door even if he had. But it's not nearly as bitter @ him as the song suggests

18. Come Back... Be Here ~ Adrian

19. Girl At Home ~ (storytelling) girls supporting girls

Fifteen (EP)

(the EP based off the songs she wrote in school/post losing adrian)

1. Love Story ~ Adrian

2. Fearless ~ Adrian

3. Fifteen ~ Herself and kind of a message to Haley to put her dreams first

4. You Belong With Me ~ Adrian/Paisley but lowkey any girl taking interest in him. I.e. margo etc.

5. Better Than Revenge ~ Paisley/Margo

6. Last Kiss ~ Adrian

7. Enchanted ~ Adrian when they met again at St Judes. their first official date was at a ball esque thingy

8. Ours ~ about Adrian @ her parents and the disapproval

9. Mine ~ Adrian (Storytelling) what she imagined

Safe And Sound (EP)

(The EP about/for haley)

1. Safe And Sound ~ a lullaby for haley

2. Innocent ~ about herself in a way and trying to forgive herself for hr mistakes when it came to haley and the choices she make but also reminding her that she could stay innocent and young for as long as possible

3. Never Grow Up ~ wishing she doesn't grow up too fast because she very much did and it was terrifying

4. Untouchable ~ How haley's kept away from her

5. Breathe ~ the follow on from untouchable and not being able to breathe without her

Welcome To New York

1. Welcome To New York ~ Her love for the city and dreaming of living there

2. Blank Space ~ (Storytelling)

3. Style ~ Adrian

4. Out Of The Woods ~ the aftermath of (tw) the rape and holly fighting to get out of the dark place and there's obviously hints of Adrian in there being with her through it

5. All You Had To Do Was Stay ~ Soraya & Dallas (storytelling)

6. Shake It Off ~ speaks for itself basically for her fans

7. I Wish You Would ~ Adrian after he disappeared when she first got pregnant and they separated

8. Bad Blood ~ Anyone against her and labelling her as the mean girl. She went very theatrical and played on it. Although everyone thinks it's specifically about Hensley, she was just one name on a long list

9. Wildest Dreams ~ back when she first started at St Judes and met Julian again, his was another sing based on their first date at the ball-esque event

10. How You Get The Girl ~ at Dallas about Soraya

11. This Love ~ Adrian

12. I Know Places ~ wanting to hide from the insider and paps and opinions whether it's with Adrian or on her own.

13. Clean ~ The last song she wrote for the album and it's about (tw) the rape. It was the first thing she ever wrote about it so it's extremely personal

14. Wonderland ~ (storytelling)

15. You Are In Love ~ Adrian

16 . New Romantics ~ St Judes/Monroe life

Reputation

1. Ready For It? ~ preparing for battle in a way. this was one of if not her biggest album and it was all about her fighting back and taking control of her public narrative. She wrote/sang about things you'd never expect and said ings you'd never expect so it's getting ready for that

2. End Game ~ Adrian

3. I Did Something Bad ~ Everyone who did her wrong and called her the mean girl

4. Don't Blame Me ~ Adrian

5. Delicate ~ Adrian

6. Look What You Made Me Do ~ are you ready for it 2.0

7. So It Goes... ~ Adrian

8. Gorgeous ~ Adrian/Haley/Soraya

9. Getaway Car ~ Park

10. King Of My Heart ~ Adrian

11. Dancing With Our Hands Tied ~ Adrian

12. Dress ~ Adrian

13. This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things ~ about the shit she gets for winning awards

14. Call It What You Want ~ Adrian and their relationship but it's aimed at their parents

15. New Years Day ~ painting a nice picture of new years day (because She was (tw) raped on new years eve night just before midnight) and basically how Adrian was there for her the day after and picked her back up

Lover

1. I Forgot That You Existed ~ anyone not on her side and lowkey about the guy who r*ped her. Although that's on her mind a lot, this would have been her when she's enjoying her time with someone and she forgets for one night. Or how she wishes she could forget about him for good.

2. Cruel Summer ~ probably her brief rebound of a relationship with park tbh and she convinced herself it was love to try and make herself feel better about the guilt. But ultimately they both knew it wasn't good or going to work.

3. Lover ~ about Holly and Adrian finally being in complete control of their relationship but still having insecure moments where she worries about losing him, but he's there every time. It speaks for itself mainly tbh.

4. The Man ~ the feminist jumped out LOL she aimed for this one to be relatable in every sense cause she knows it's a very common topic. But some things jump out from her own experiences like: "when everyone believes ya, what's that like?" About the r*ape trial.

5. The Archer ~ I love how holly it is 😩 reflecting on how she handled certain situations like things with hensley (bad blood) and how she's made a lot of mistakes. And being lowkey terrified she'll lose people because of it. I think mainly Adrian and Soraya tbh.

6. I Think He Knows ~ Adrian

7. Miss Americana And The Heartbreak Prince ~ about the negative affects caused by st Jude's and "fame" and having Adrian there through it all. The second first specifically would be about the night of the r*pe and when she told Adrian and he was the one of the only ones who cared what the truth was. Personally I think this is the most holly song on the album! I knew exactly what she'd write it about as soon as I heard it lol

8. Paper Rings ~ Adrian

8. Cornelia Street ~ kinda Begin Again 2.0 for holly and it basically being about that first time she saw Adrian again after they're 4 years apart and the fear she had of losing them/him again. I especially feel the line "It's the kind of heartbreak time could never mend"

9. Death By A Thousand Cuts (storytelling)

10. London Boy ~ her dream has always been to live in New York so she's kinda made herself new York in this album and Adrian's the London boy, even though he isn't English LOL? but their relationship lives in London basically. And she loves NY but she'd go wherever he is instead.

11. Soon You'll Get Better ft The Dixie Chicks ~ Soraya's health problems, how much her wellbeing means to holly and how desperately she needs her to just be okay all the time.

12. False god ~ I picture her breakup with Adrian back when she was pregnant and they were kids. How it all went to shit but that small hope still there "We might just get away with it." She probably would have taken snippets from old journals back from that time for this.

13. You Need To Calm Down ~ It's about ever form of love

14. Afterglow ~ this one hits me so much and cause I'm so invested in holly and adrian, hurts my heart. Basically apologising for hurting him ever, mainly with Park. But lowkey the r*pe thing too. Even tho he'd never be mad or blame her for that, she blamed herself at one point. And She panics regularly that it would ruin them.

15. ME! ~ a confidence boost for herself, her friends and her fans.

16. It's Nice To Have A Friend ~ being in love with your best friend. Also how I picture her and Adrian starting out in school.

17. Daylight ~ about how her and Adrian both had other things while they weren't together, but since they got back together, it was like stepping back into the daylight and nothing can be as perfect as that feeling they have with each other. They never really had it with anyone else.

Folklore

1. The 1 ~ (storytelling)

2. Cardigan ~ recently holly has defo felt kind of forgotten about and falling into the shadows. And as always, Adrian is slowly started to pull her out of her dark place.

3. The Last Great American Dynasty ~ awhile ago Adrian bought them a kind of holiday home and she wrote a story about the previous owner (storytelling)

4. Exile ft Bon Iver ~ the last song she wrote for the album. Her and Adrian recently broke up and have one of if not their biggest arguments and this was about that

5. My Tears Ricochet ~ Her Parents

6. Mirrorball ~ about being what the media want you to be and being perfect and when you fall and break they watch as if it's entertainment

7. Seven ~ (storytelling) a childhood friendship where one is suffering (tw) in am abusive household and the other wants to rescue them. It's also about wanting to stay young as long as possible and when we stopped doing the little things only children get away with

8. August ~ Park

9. This Is Me trying ~ Herself and her struggle to hold it all together. She defo would have had that moment of being on the edge of a cliff and having the moment she decided to back away from it

10. Illicit Affairs ~ Park

11. Invisible String ~ Adrian

12. Mad Woman ~ Herself and women in general

13. Epiphany ~ (storytelling) a couple/people during world war 2

14. Betty ~ (storytelling)

15. Peace ~ for Adrian

16. Hoax ~ (storytelling)

17. The Lakes ~ wanting to run away but of course only with Adrian

Other Songs