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#girl i have so many teshes thoughts its INSANE
microwaving-tesilid-argente
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1 month
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#girl i have so many teshes thoughts its INSANE
#me starting with haha actually this ship has no basis i just want to Put Tesilid Through It
#but over the past few months of brainrotting their dynamic is now like.
#what if we were doomed from the start and there was never anything either of us could do to save the other
#(not even talking about the regression but rather the stigma bearer thing and how they have no social power)
#(but also the regression thing)
#what if we loved each other throughout all the lifetimes but there could never be a happy ending. tragedy dogs our footsteps
#what if we were 'guy who has a good head on his shoulders and recognises our low social positions and looks out for his friends in similar
#predicaments' x 'guy who is way too giving and this is bad bc the world is out to get him and he loves ppl too much to care about
#the danger to himself'
#what if we were 'guy who is way too giving' x 'guy who wants to protect him but Cant'
#doomed ships.....
#swings hestio around i like you SO much. i need to put you under a microscope and in a fish tank
#(statements that should not ever be viewed by people outside of tumblr)
#some of my fic outlines has notes that are like 'wow if they had the transmigrators privilege this wouldnt even have been a problem'
#and im suddenly very appreciative of canon
#god bless canon tesilid may you be happy. not my fanfic tesilid though im making him miserable
#anyway. the more i think about it the more interesting hestio's internal conflict could be
#it's about being so acutely aware of how shit their lives already are that he knows having a r/s that is frowned upon would just
#make things worse
#also i am very much hooked by the fact that like. nowadays i keep seeing ship posts about 'killing myself in front of you to change the
#trajectory of your life forever'
#for teshes its the opposite. hestio is desperately trying to make sure tesilid doesnt off himself
#and also its not hestio dying that changes the trajectory of tesilid's life forever it's hestio confessing
#and somehow this inflicts more pain on tesilid in the long run
#which is extremely funny bc for all the notes that ive written abt teshes hestio has only confessed like umm. checks notes. 3 times
#1. drunk (tesilid is not in the room) 2. the world is ending
#like if hestio had managed to take this to the grave like he had originally planned then this could have been avoided
#but the tragedy is that tesilid lives thru this multiple times so at least ONE time hestio's going to blab and that forever changes things
#crying in fic writing being stupidly hard
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