#i also think knowing atsushi who also challenges his world view - by wanting to cling to life no matter what - may also help

[daz4i]

dazai approaches life with the idea that wanting anything is pointless because it will be taken from you

chuuya keeps losing everyone important to him and yet he keeps going, he finds new friends, he keeps living as his own person

in a way, chuuya's life is like a confirmation of dazai's bias; any time he has something good, someone important to him, a connection, it gets taken away from him

and yet unlike dazai, he doesn't give in to despair

and i think that might be one of the reasons dazai finds him interesting enough to care about. because chuuya actively challenges the way he sees life itself just by doing his own thing. he doesn't go out of his way to talk dazai into seeing value in life, and i think this is the sort of language dazai has an easier time speaking

#just an observation. i could be wrong. i could be projecting. feel free to disagree #also i think this is why dazai thinks he hates chuuya #bc i mean. even if he's interesting. it's still annoying as hell when someone challenges your world view constantly #especially when they're not doing it on purpose. but at the same time this is smth that's good for dazai i think #and i think that now post oda's death and as an adult who's been away from the mafia for awhile. he might know it too #i also think knowing atsushi who also challenges his world view - by wanting to cling to life no matter what - may also help #like. help him figure things out and sort his thoughts on the matter. seeing atsushi have a good impact on him - #- and realizing chuuya had a good impact on him too even if he didn't realize it at the time. maybe. #but now I'm just rambling and speculating lol ignore me 👍