#i will watch them fuck up on purpose :)

[meteortrails]

the thing I keep coming back to at the end of the day here is that luffy’s got some insane latent abandonment issues, and zoro and nami are the absolute surest thing he has. he has those two Locked The Fuck Down so hard he might as well have put a ring on it before they even hit loguetown and he knew they’d be his from the second he saw them. they’re his aces in the hole that he can always count on to help him cut through all the bullshit and get to the heart of the situation. something that always stands out to me is the way that when luffy and zoro end up tied up in a combat situation, it often falls to nami to direct and organize the crew (most notably in water 7); they’re his seconds in command, one to back him up on the battlefield and one to hold down the fort so he’s free to fight as he pleases. and in return for this faith and trust nami and zoro are genuinely the most obsessively devoted motherfuckers they’re capable of being! none of their dreams belong to just them anymore it’s THEIR dream to make luffy king of the pirates, THEIR dream to map the world, THEIR dream to become the best swordsman. frankly if they all loved each other any more than they do they might just burst

#one piece #I literally cannot ever stop thinking about how they never fucking doubt each other. not when it matters. they’ll all always come through #btw nami does end up calling the shots surprisingly often when you keep track of it #romance dawn trio #my like. rule for them ig. is nami watches the road. zoro watches their backs. and luffy watches the horizon #logistics protection and purpose if that makes sense #op meta

[dailykugisaki]

Day Seventy-five | id in alt

He used her shirt as a washcloth because she accidentally left it in the bathroom and she came and shaved the middle of his head in his sleep.

Sukuna probably fixed it because he doesn't wanna look ugly when possessing somebody.

#dailykugisaki #jjk #kugisaki nobara #itadori yuji #They're such weirdos and i love them #siblings to the core. they know everything and nothing and will actually destroy a building because of their antics #also im never NEVER giving any first year or second year a chiseled jaw because NO ABSOLUTELY NOT!!! THEY ARE KIDS HOW THE HELL??? #anywayyy Kugisaki fucks up Itadoris day on purpose but she does it better than sukuna ever will because she doesn't traumatize him #and shes infinitely funnier than sukuna because as much as yall say he isn't. hes not funny when it counts #im thanking my fucking friend for this idea bc they're watching jujutsu kaisen bc i was brain rotting over Kugisaki and they said this joke

[mootmuse]

shoves this message into a bottle and sends it back in time to every person in charge of every single one of jr ntr’s outfits in every dance he did in every one of the movies he filmed back when he was chubby:

your movie’s spent all this time building his character up to be so cool and so badass and so sexy and you change your mind at the last second? ‘they’ll only believe he’s sexy until they find out he’s chubby, got to hide it!’ no. incorrect. his outfits are being designed by cowards and fools. if his love interest gets to dance in cute little form fitting outfits so does he. stop putting him in potato sacks like we don’t want to see him. you tell me I should be into him and then you cockblock me like this

#jr ntr #just finished watching aadi and this is once again on my mind #the rant which is and was and will be #i WILL rant about this again #it might have been this movie but there was even a dance where his backup dancers were shirtless and oiled up #and he was in MULTIPLE LAYERS #are they fucking with me on purpose???? #why are y’all making a movie designed to be like oh this guy is so cool if you can’t fuckin commit #move aside I’ll design his outfits #i heard he got assholes in the press making comments about his weight back in the day #make me his outfit designer and i will take care of them too #i will never get to see just how hot he was when he was chubby and it kills me #they were all fools #except whoever put him in that undershirt at the beginning of rakhi. that person can stay

[iknowwhereyousleepatnight]

the reason i’m not afraid of aging is because i want to be a hot middle-aged man who has a toxic yaoi relationship with another middle-aged man

#u know i used to be so afraid of aging until i realized that i want to be a dilf. now it’s kinda exciting #i realized recently that i could never picture myself living past my twenties until i pictured myself as a man #but like. i want to be a man and a woman and nothing and everything #but like. i’m cool with how i look now for the most part idk if i would want to transition physically at least not rn #and rn i still dress fem enough that everyone goes straight to she/her #and i like she/her but it hurts rn #bc some of my family has switched to they/them or it/its and it’s just so soothing #but family that knows i don’t like it still use she/her and phrases like ‘daughter’ or whatever even more often on purpose #and it hurts bc i don’t really feel the need to change the way i dress/look but i know everyone assumes she/her #when they see me in a dress or skirt. even w how very not-cis my fashion sense is #but also i fucking hate pants which is a separate thing (prob autism tbh) and even if i wore pants they’d still use she/her #thinking of changing my name to something very masc so i can confuse people enough that they’ll stop defaulting to she/her #and i haven’t told ppl outside my immediate family so idc if they use she/her but i’m fucking pissed when ppl in the family do it #anyways side note when i was 12 my ideal gender (b4 i knew about being non-cis) was a floating consciousness w no body #or a plastic-doll-like creation that’s smooth all over #… i still want to be a floating consciousness actually lmao. it would be great #back then i hated being a girl but i didn’t know there were more options and also i was socially isolated (didn’t leave home for like 2yrs) #and my mother was openly transphobic whenever the topic was brought up so that was my only real experience #but i didn’t really internalize it other than the fact that my mother would be rude if i ever happened to be not-cis and guess what? she is #anyways it’s like 2am and also i’m only awake bc i was captivated by a sugar daddy middle aged gay fic for a show i watched like 5 episodes #for 2 years ago #sorry for rambling in the middle of the night lol #gn y’all

[snekdood]

Hey so uh.

I dont think voting is the only solution. Nor will it necessarily get us what we want immediately. And i think protest is more important and more effective.

However.

Conservatives. Would. Not. Be. Trying. To. Make. Voting. Impossible. And. Taking away. Actual voting places from marginalized areas. .

If it meant ABSOLUTELY nothing.

Hope that helps.

✌️

#if it makes me a lib to just even ACKNOWLEDGE that fact. then i think ur probably an entirely irrational person. #very. very sorry for wanting to do everything i can. very sorry. #its almost like... you can protest...... and also.... vote......... #its almost like voting in of itself at this point is kinda a protest since theres places w voting booths being removed or people who have #to drive miles just to vote. like. i kinda think it means somethin here pal. #like. republicans dont want us to vote. it benefits them when we dont. it also benefits them when you're riddled with nihilistic apathy. #u probably feel so defeated that u probably dont even think debate matters or means anything at all #whatever. im bored of you and your personality. #its this type of nihilistic thinking that leads to accelerationism. you think fuck it. lets just let the republicans win. show the world #how bad they are. thinking that will make people finally stand up. but the problem is people are cowards. and they wont. and i dont think #its worth taking the chance on and rolling the dice on when the outcome of letting republicans win is very likely to be genocide. #and i really really dont think being smug and all 'i told you so' to libs is worth it enough for vast amounts of people. people you #probably care about. being killed in swathes. i really really dont think letting things get Worse on Purpose is a great idea #and it honestly makes you look like an evangelical republican who thinkis climate change is a smite from god. #bc functionally you're doing the fucking same thing. instead though you're pretending its a smite from you. #i kinda firmly believe that accelerationism is a intellectual bystanders excuse for not doing shit. like genuinely just sitting there #watching ppl suffer to prove a point. gtfoh

[seafoam-taide]

ok. ok. ok. fine. im gonna post them. BUT. i will not tag them.

#my art #chartreux youre so fucking nice to me. here. look at these images #catching up on october daily drawings bcuz my pen tablet was dead for a bit #on october 4th and 5th i watched the rest of inanimate insanity invitational #so. this is what i would have drawn had i drawn them on the actual days #humanization #<- the ONLY related tag im gonna put on here cuz i heard some people dont like it when people do this #so. for blocking purposes #i actually rlly like how these turned out i just got nervous that other people would Not like how they turned out #ok thats enough anxious rambling. points gun at me. post the post fucker #inanimate insanity #quietly edits this on cuz im feeling less garbage. idek if editing puts it in the tag oh well

[psalmsofpsychosis]

yeah so i dont get the "wasn't that some fucked up shit? anyway i'm Rod Sterling" mentality some people have towards different narrative reads. It's all sweet and cool to want to explore all the different variations of a fucked up scenario, but i'm gonna need the reasons for it. I need the "why"; why are we exploring this thing? Why is it important to explore this story? what am i getting out of it? and no it's not about morality.

I dont need a story to teach me "good" life lessons, though that'd be lovely. I dont need it to be an exceptional and exemplary narrative even, but i need my discoveries to be purposeful and meaningful. Sometimes the aim for an exploration of say, a very tragic story, is to simply experiences the different flavours and nuances and complexities of a deeply held personal emotion; sometimes it helps us find the mirroring and connection and relatedness that we need to feel seen and heard and understood. Sometimes it helps you parse out your own bullshit by taking it out of your head and putting it in front of you– i dont care what the reason is, but there's a reason. There's a purpose for every single endeavour you take on, even if you haven't discovered the reason yet. "i just want to experience a fucked up shit" lazy superficial thinking, dig deeper. I hate superficial and purposeless shit; and no i'm not gonna explore the 863796373th trending trauma porn piece of the day because "wouldn't that be fucked up?" nah. I dont care, it's got no use to me. I will absolutely respect the endeavour and make space for it if someone tells me something as simple as "it is relevant to me and my interests and experiences and my mental preoccupations, and helps me refine my humanity and my understanding of humanity in general", that is a lovely and true statement. But if someone keeps churning out worst possible fucked up sad scenarios one after another under the "wouldn't that be fucked up?" flag, i'm out, i dont give a fuck. take your sad shit somewhere else, i have absolutely zero space for purposeless horrible narratives that positively add nothing to my life and dont help me navigate it in any meaningful way.

#and no we dont say the same thing about happy stories because happy stories feel good. that can be a purpose in and of itself #if someone tells me that tragic stories make them feel good i can still make space for it; it's not as sturdy a means but it'll do just fin #i literally dont get the '' fucked up story for the sake of fucked up story'' crowd like ??????? #you guys do understand that we live by the narratives we immerse ourselves into right?? you know that our worldviews and beliefs #and conscious/subconscious frameworks are all stories we tell ourselves right?? right????? #This rant delivered to you by me seeing that tumblr famous Tamsyn Muir quote 3 in the morning and like #lmaoooo no. #millenials leak their incessant nihilism into every fucking crevice of the arts and it's so tiring to watch. #no your constant deconstruction of meaning and purpose and value is not cute #no you're not subversive and revolutionary for creating the 85379637th Sad Shit Of The Day— you're literally protocol behavior #and you couldn't be more in alignment with the moral status quo of our time. #no aimless and listless shock value traumatic stories are not fun and 'adventurous'; #they just speak to you circling right back into the comfortable confinements of your socially acceptable superficiality #and vapid consumerism. #goddd i'm tired. lack of purpose frees these fuckers from ever having to align with any substantial endeavour in their goddamn lives #and they think it's so funny; it's not. #I expect something out of the stories i explore. ''tragedy for the sake of tragedy'' is the laziest thing i have ever heard. #humans are designed to be happy; they're also designed to engage in meaningful and intentional growth. #own up to anything to gives you a chance to grow and expand and change or get the fuck out of my face #this blog is an absolutely unsafe space for socially sanctioned neutered nihilism #i will hunt you for sport; it doesn't matter anyway right??

[jemmo]

i can’t tell you how much i usually hate these ignoring, distancing plots in shows and how much i absolutely adore everything about these 2 episodes of the eighth sense. like im not having a good time, and it’s fantastic.

bc the thing is, in all of this, i can’t see the right way to go, i can’t find the person to blame, i can’t find the way to make it better. I can’t single out a single moment or a thing someone did and say “this is why everything went wrong”. it’s just this coming together and rise and swell of things happening and people feeling things that has us ending up here and it feels beautifully and horribly organic bc we can’t find that point where it all went wrong. was it on that rooftop? was it at the beach? was it when they first met? was it when his brother died? was it when he was born into this family? there is no single point. it’s all of them and it’s none of them. there is truly nothing and no one to blame. and there are bad characters in the show, people you can hate, eunji and taehyung, but neither of them are to blame for any of the bad stuff that happens in the show. you’re not waiting for them to be taken down bc that doesn’t solve anything. instead, it’s just two people hurting, and not knowing how to make it better.

bc you take jaewon, and after what he says at the end of ep 8, you want to hate him, you want to be so angry at him for what he says, for how he acts, how dismissive and hurtful he is, and yet you’ve been made to understand 100% why, and not just in a “i get it but that wasn’t the right thing to do” way, in a “that was horrible and yet i know he doesn’t see any other way to handle this” way. like you don’t see this as a misstep, or a step to far, bc you know for him, in his state of mind, it is completely justified, it’s necessary. bc it not only punishes the person he blames for all of this, himself, but he sees it as a way to protect jihyun. and not even in a cliche “bad things happen when people around me, the people I love always get hurt” kinda way, but more so in that he sees that he is a scared, messy, struggling person that doesn’t know how to handle himself, and doesn’t want to inflict that on anyone, let alone the person he cares about. so what’s worse, a quick, swift blow that hurts but cuts everything off cleanly, or this prolonged relationship where he inevitably continues to weigh jihyun down with the weight of his trauma, and take it out on him. what’s the point of having a place of refuge when you ruin it more and more every time you depend on it, until it eventually can’t offer you comfort. it’s a lesser of two evils, jaewon’s choice is obvious to him.

but then you take jihyun. and we talk about masks and fronts but we never once question whether jihyun wears a mask bc he appears so sweet and innocent and naive, what can this boy possibly be putting up a front for. but i see it, this almost fake it till you make it confidence front that yes is becoming more natural. but my god just think about what he’s gone through for a second. think about it. left home for the first time in his life, moved to an unfamiliar and intimidating city with only one other person he knows, started a new job, started university, tried to build relationships, met a man that intrigues him, and perused him only to be kissed and then ignored, then maybe establish something tentative, only to then see him spiral, go on a trip where he shared his trauma, you have an intimate night together only to almost die, and then be not only ignored, but plain and simple rejected and pushed away. like… you can say all you want about jihyun growing as a person and having more courage, but no amount of growth for however many months this has been going on for can prepare you for that. for the mixed messages on steroids. for the back and forth, not knowing. to give yourself to someone like that and go through something traumatic and then be abandoned by that person. we get it, bc we see all of jaewon’s story. but apart from what jaewon shared at the beach, jihyun doesn’t know any more than that. he doesn’t know about therapy, about how his father acts towards him, about the extent of his trauma and how it manifests and affects his mental health, and how he is struggling every single day. and you can’t expect him to know the depths of that no matter how empathetic and connected he is, how much he cares about jaewon, he can’t be superhuman. and so you get why he pushes and fights for jaewon. like… he is in love. it’s clear. he’s fallen in love with him. he is this wide-eyed, open kid that fell in love with a senior. and jaewon has just messed with his head, he’s never been clear, and you can’t expect jihyun to just get past that bc he knows something is up with jaewon. he can’t know the full story, but even if he did, that can’t be a reason or a justification to be treated the way jaewon treats him. bc we’re all about jaewon putting himself first and doing what he wants and respecting himself like that, but jihyun deserves that too. and it’s such a fine line to tread when you know someone is going through something, bc again you understand why, but you’re still the one being treated that way. like we talk about jaewon’s trauma, but here jihyun was part of it, he went through that traumatic experience. he’s the one that nearly lost his life. and yes, he appears to handle it well, and no matter to what extent that’s true or not, you can’t not look at jaewon struggling and understand it and then not look at jihyun with that same understanding. it’s not about comparing trauma and pain and deciding who is suffering more, it’s seeing that there are two people in this, and they’ve both been affected, so we should give them the same level of understanding.

and that’s something jaewon has to see. that his self-preservation is selfish. that his destructive behavior doesn’t just affect jihyun, instead it feels pointed and directed, bc every way jaewon hurts himself hurts jihyun. and it comes bc jihyun was so much of what was good about jaewon’s life for a second, so attacking that is his only form of self-sabotage. he can’t mess up his relationship with his friends or parents bc they were broken in the first place, and he can’t sabotage his future bc it’s already been ruined the moment he didn’t pursue his photography major. him nearly getting kicked out of school affected him so little not just bc he wanted that punishment, but bc even that punishment meant so little to him. all these things are established and they already contribute to his suffering. removing jihyun from his life is the only active thing he can do to make himself feel worse, and he can veil it in an act of protection, and even feel like he’s doing the right thing, but that deceives them both into believing this is done from a good place, when no good can actually come of it. in trying to protect jihyun, you hurt him more. in trying to hurt yourself, you hurt him too. and when someone is in a headspace like jaewon is, you look for that thing that’ll break through. bc he is so distant, he’s trying to remove himself from reality, and jihyun needs to act as this person that can anchor him to it. when you’re trying to isolate and separate yourself, sometimes seeing that you still affect things, that there’s a persons that exists that is affected and hurt by your actions, and no matter how you try to cut yourself off, you cannot stop that, separating yourself still hurts them, maybe that’s a thing that can get through. but that’s something that depends on jaewon. ultimately, he’s the only one that can get himself out of this place, and that’s what makes it so hard, that no matter how much jihyun cares and how much he fights for him, nothing can come of that effort is jaewon doesn’t meet him there. and it’d be so easy for jihyun to give in, to take the hurt, but over the course of this show we’ve seen the strength jihyun has developed, which has only seemed to increase more so after the accident, call it a renewed vigor for life or something. he has the strength that jaewon doesn’t, to not let his pain consume him. and in a beautiful full-circle moment, it’s because of jaewon, bc when they first spoke he sparked in jihyun a want to be stronger, to be more than the country mouse, and he’s done it. and it’s that courage that means he can fight for jaewon, even in the face of rejection. he trusts himself and that he knows jaewon, the real jaewon, to see past words that are intended to hurt them both, and go after the person that’s still inside jaewon somewhere. no, he can’t do it for him, and no them being together is not some magical cure for jaewon, but it’s what can put him on a path of caring for himself again, and sometimes that has to start with caring about someone else (and suddenly I’m reminded of my beautiful man 2 and how kiyoi tries to break hira out of his worthless mindset by making him care about him, and how ultimately that can’t be enough, and that hira has to take those first steps of seeing his self worth by himself). what jihyun can do by fighting is again act as that tether to reality and try to be this representation of the good jaewon can be and do. bc look at jihyun, look at how confident and strong he has become, and look at how he got there, bc you saw that country mouse and gave him the time of day and helped him grow and gave him new experiences. you jaewon, you. and that shift in mindset, from jihyun representing hurt and the accident and the trauma of his brother and everything he can’t do, to being that light and refuge and everything he can do is again something that might breaks through. and the fact it has such narrative strength and satisfaction makes me hopeful that that’s what we might actually get.

#I did a rant #I’ve done a lot of rants actually they’re all just sitting in my notes bc they all got a little too much #my thoughts are a literal mess and I am still struggling to put them in all the right words #mostly bc the way jaewon is behaving and not to be too overinvolved is very reminiscent of *me* #and so watching him shut down and remove himself knowing it’s something i do is hard and frustrating #and I did a whole rant about it but I realised I need to separate myself from the character to be able to talk about it #so yeah #I really wanted to bring up jihyun tho #bc he presents as so strong in these two eps but you cannot argue against what he’s been through and the effect that would have on anyone #and try to see it from a perspective where we don’t know what jaewon is going through and just see his actions and realise how much he has #messed with jihyun again not at all on purpose but that 1000 to nothing jihyun went through from the trip to the accident and it’s aftermath #that’s a fucking lot #and it’s interesting that we talk so much about people putting themselves first and not putting up with shit #like I think of simon from young royals and how we celebrate him saying no to being willhelms secret as an act of self-respect #but bc we understand and empathise so much with what jaewon is going through it’s hard to make yourself even consider jihyun #but when you do see it from his side you realise it’s a lot for him too #and that you wouldn’t hate him or misunderstand him if he was mad at jaewon #and with *spoliers* is there only so much he can take of jaewon’s self sabotage hurting him until even he and his developed strength and #confidence is broken by it #he can only keep fighting for jaewon for so long and idk if it’s gonna be a case of jaewon coming round too little too late #but I just hope this isn’t easy which sounds mean I don’t want either of them to suffer more #but this isn’t a kiss and get back together and all is good #I think jaewon needs to see the bad he’s caused #bc it’s only by owning up to that that he can ground himself in the moment and see that he’s part of this world and can’t separate himself #from it and jihyun also needs to realise that no matter his headspace jaewon does want space and when someone is self sabotaging you still #have to listen and respect what they’re saying distance means distance and as much as you want to fight against it you can’t be responsible #for making it work #agh I need to stop rambling bc it’s so messy and complex and I just absolutely ADORE the level to which this situation has so many emotional #moving parts and how ultimately blameless they both are and how it makes it so much harder to see a way out it’s fantastic #the eighth sense

[roboraindrop]

Watching the Psych episode that has BD in it and MAN I have too much empathy for this episode ndjsjsk I've never watch Psych before- are all the episodes like this or am I just sensitive bc this episode is based around mental health?

#his character's name is Bernie and he's been struggling with mental health for a few years. #his girlfriend got killed and he got pinned for it. his lawyers were plwasing insanity. #Bernie was very clearly struggling greatly with his mental health and having delusions. they thought he was faking it. #so they went undercover only to discover that he WASN'T faking it. he was on antipsychotics and finally doing better though! #and then the guy who killed his gf payed a doctor to fuck up his medications and give him electro shock therapy to fuck with his memory #the big climactic fight had them purposely use one of Bernie's triggers so that he'd have a meltdown and that scene was so painful to watch #BD is such a damn good actor. when he melts down you FEEL it #at least i do fkdndkb #Anyways my heart aches for Bernie. i wish that he didnt have to go through that. #rain rambles

[hauntingblue]

Gear 5 luffy's laugh is so contagious I just hear the drums and go insane how does this work. What did he do to me

#i still cant believe how much this new opening theme goes off.... DREAM SAVE ALL OF US 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻 AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH 💥💥💥💥💥💥 #wait a second. the robot attacked 200 years ago. the void century was 800 years ago no????? what #oh see it was made 900 years ago.... but why did it attack 200 years ago then.... what happened #it is still so funny how they made evegapunk einstein but with some cunty long legs #200 years ago they gave rights to the gyojin!!! i see i see ✍️✍️also i still wonder why law and kuma have similar hat and pants designs #like there is NO WAY that much similarity isnt done on purpose. NO FUCKING WAY!!! I NEED ANSWERS!!! #are they annihliating cp ships akdhakskd yeah vegapunk letsgo #also the opening song is about dreams and the end one is about luffy reaching shanks...... havent got a clue why but there it is #talking tag #watching one piece #episode 1098 #also is lucci named lucci bc it kinda sounds like luffy. SERAPHIM KUMA HAS HIS DEVIL FRUIT???? vegapunk could only make zoan fruits???? #also wdym when cp0 acts it means its some historic event. lucci is like 25. where are the experienced people here #sentomaru works for vegapunk??? maybe i forgor about this tbh also do theu have a doffy seraphim??? the fact they have animal names.... #stussy letting kaku get hurt akdhsjsn oh atlas has lamb ears..... and lucci said she is is prey... no..... the foresahdowing :( #lucci you fucked up she just gave luffy food... that a death sentence look what happened to kaido #episode 1099 #<- oh my god btw. god. jesus. #why is akainu telling the cp0 what to do or thinks he can do that... thats the world gov... also thinkng about how garp should fight him #and not luffy.... because of ace you know... i still wonder how did sengoku know who ace's father was... there is only one man who knew.... #everyone trying to stop them from fighting ajdhsksjks two rabid dogs fr #LUFFY TAKING OFF HIS JACKET WHEN LUCCI ASKS FOR HIS WANTED SIGN!!!! GO OFF KING!!!! SLAY!!! THE CREW SAW HIM!!! FINALLY!!! #i have been smiling since he started the transformation this is so sick...... i have got a case of the luffy brain #zoan fruits steal the personality of the user when they awaken ✍️✍️ luffy???? nami being the only one who saw gear 5 <3 twins manifesto #robin being so shook about luffy being a god ajdbjansk wdym devil fruits exist because people wish for them. fairy magic real???? #WHAT DO YOU MEAN THEY ARE FROM ALTERNATE REALITIES WHERE SOMEONE DREAMT ABOUT THEM??? DOES HE TRAVEL THRU REALITIES FOR THEM??? #jinbe has been making this face 😧 every episode three times it is amazing ajdhaksnsk poor man... now he sees a kid angel version of himself #after seeing hia captain turn into a god... he is gonna get a stroke OMG SENTOMARU WE JUST GOT YOU BACK #episode 1100 #<- CRAZY. INSANE. OH GOD. ONLY 12 LEFT. THATS A WEEKEND!!! I CANT DO THIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[goodmorningnona]

listen okay ive been going on about this for like a week now but i just think it's a little funny that ever since i had to stop therapy there's been a MASSIVE increase in my writing. it is not only a wonderful creative hobby but also helps me get through shit and process my emotions and i dont think that's bad at all! but i am living up to the stereotype of creatives Not Being Okay and i do love that and think it's a little bit funny.

#in fact. the less okay i am the better my work gets and that is sooooo toxic cancel me #i wont fuck myself up TOO bad on purpose de #*dw #but anyway i keep being told by even like GOOD therapists that i know all the things anyway and i just verbally work out the problem w them #listening rather than them give me advice so maybe i should just continue this i might actually Be Good. ........ for now. #and YES i know it's probably a bit of a maladaptive coping mechanism but im autistic im allowed one (1) maladaptive coping mechanism as a #treat. and i dont watch tv and havent been gaming SO LET ME HAVE THIS #i must CREATE WITH MY HANDS it feels so much more relaxing to me than doomscrolling and also silences the developing workaholism by giving #me a Product #OKAY IM SHUTTING UP NOW I HAVENT TALKED MUCH TODAY IVE JUST BEEN WRITING SKFBDJDJ #'im shutting up now' i say on my Own Blog as if anyone gonna read this anyway wkfjeksjs #in my can't stop wont stop era fr #lessons of the hand and the mouth

[tathrin]

📽 action!: rank all six of the films (or three if you're a hater)

Answers for this LotR ask-game.

Ahh okay so at this point I have to confess something terrible: I still have not seen the third Hobbit movie. I'm sorry! I just couldn't do it. The fuckery of it all, especially in the second movie with Mirkwood and Thranduil and Legolas ("a lowly Silvan elf" what the FUCK what the fuck PJ WHAT THE FUCK), was just too much for me. Character-assassination is one thing, and I thought after Denethor I knew what I was going to be getting with Thranduil but NOPE! It was literal world building assassination and I just CANNOT.

Don't get me wrong, Lee Pace did an amazing job and actually seeing Mirkwood was amazing and it was genuinely delightful to see Orlando put those ears on again; but the OuTrAgE that filled my heart at the yeet-ing of what minimal canon we even have for the Mirkwood elves was just intolerable, and while I did mean to go see it, really I did, I just...couldn't actually get the motivation to go before it was out of theatres. I've heard the EE are better (less studio fuckery) so I'll watch them someday! Honest! I just...haven't. yet.

And as to the Lord of the Rings trilogy...man, I don't even know how to do this. In terms of which is the best film, or in terms of which one I enjoy watching most, or in terms of which on hits me in the heart hardest or...? I don't know if I can objectively rank my feelings about these movies even in my own brain because RotK ends with Into the West and I have FeelingsTM about the Undying Lands and Sea Longing okay. So the last scene of RotK at the Grey Havens is a fucking spear through the heart every time and I can't even describe the knot of feelings it engenders, and I think overall TTT may be my favorite but also it has Plot Issues that piss me off even more than the Plot Issues in RotK I think,...yeah, we're going to do this in terms of Film Crafting rather than personal favorites because I'm having too many feelings lmao. So! In order of most-well-done-movie to least:

Fellowship of the Ring

The Two Towers

Return Of The King

The Desolation of Smaug

An Unexpected Journey

#look there are some REALLY LOVELY MOMENTS in the hobbit movies #(all three of them; i've seen enough stuff floating around the internet to know that even about the one i haven't actually seen lmao) #but the ratio of beautiful moments to what-the-fuckery is just so skewed to the latter #and the cartoonish unreality of most of the effects do NOT help #it's like somebody watched the mumakil bit from rotk and went ''more of that but dial it up to eleventy-one!'' and i just... #do y'all know how FUCKING EXCITED i was to see the White Council??? #to see GALADRIEL? #to see sauron thrown out of dol guldur? TO SEE THE WHITE COUNCIL!??? #because as soon as i heard ''three movies'' i knew I KNEW (i hoped) that they had to be adding that it #because how the fuck else were they going to pad-out that tiny little book into three whole movies? OBVIOUSLY with the white council!!! #and then...we got a chase scene in the mines that made the podracing look like it deserved an oscar #and the most cringe-inducingly-artificial cgi armies at war that i think i've ever seen even IN video games #it was like watching galactic battlegrounds middle-earth edition wtf #did y'all literally just make one elf and one dwarf and copy-past them a million times into the scene wtffffff #but i still need to make it clear that i DO love the good bits that's what makes the bad parts hurt so much! #like: does the fact that the elves coming to helm's deep make no sense and also VANISH from the plot as soon as it's over irritate me? YES! #but the battle itself is filmed with so much HEART that i don't care I DON'T CARE #i still cheer at ''no orc horn'' i still weep at haldir's death (GODS that MUSIC!) i still watch the whole thing RAPT and ENTHRALLED #but 80% of the hobbit's actions scenes don't DO anything they're just empty pixels with less purpose than the droid factory on geonosis #and there should be SO MUCH HEART because that's WHAT TOLKIEN IS auuuughhhhhh #and the fact that they missed the entire fucking EVERYTHING about MIRKWOOD of all fucking places...! UGH #DO YOU KNOW HOW AMAZING THESE ACTORS WOULD HAVE BEEN IN THESE ROLES IF THEY'D ACTUALLY BEEN FILMING THIS STORY??? PJ WHY! #lotr movies #hobbit movies #middle earth asks

[pepprs]

like it’s VERY very important to not text and drive. and i understand how dangerous it is to do that and to be distracted at all in any way for any amount of time on the road. i know it’s important to learn about these stories and bear witness to them. but i just think. like idk. watching multiple of them every day for 10 days (with a two day break halfway through for the weekend) is realy… like idk. i think after seeing a couple you can get the point. i don’t want to sound dismissive or lackadaisacal and im scared im sounding like that but i just am so freaked out by all of this and witb every new horror they’re showing us it’s scaring me worse.

#purrs #delete later #car accidents tw #death tw #child death tw #ask to tag #drivers ed tag #like this sucks so bad. we go from watching a video about how to drive in the city… to a 10 minute vid of a man talking abt how he hit and #killed 3 kids and it shows a PICTURE OF THE SCENE OF THE ACCIDENT WITH BLOOD AND EVERYTHING… and then after the video we immediately start #talking about like. fucking street cleaners and how you have to watch out for them. HOW is the video about the kids being hit and killed #part of the flow of the learning. what purpose does it serve. and it’s like these are REAL PEOPLE who died. real kids who existed. and it #just feels kind of fucked up. maybe it’s more fucked up thst im not following the flow and accepting the weight of it but it’s hard to when #im scared as fuck and just want to not be shown gore videos anymore. and then once we pick up the content again like abt street cleaners and #shit i can’t focus on any content bc i have to wind down from seeing the dead bodies and hearing the letter the parents wrote. like how is t #this helping. maybe it’s landing / more necessary for the 16 year olds but im 24. i am a whole adult. i do not take being alive for granted #i am terrified of death and dying and painfully aware of how fragile human beings are and how easy it is to be in danger. this is not #helping me or sending me a message it’s just making me so scared and terrified to even leave the house and unable to stop thinking about #death or injury lol!!! and i can’t tell them to stop and i can’t quit bc i need my fucking license so i have to just put my head down and #do this but it sucks indescribably. and we also saw one of those trick videos again too that makes you feel stupid bc it tells you to count #the number of lkke. things you see and it turns out i missed a few AND they were like did you notice what was going on in the background snd #i didn’t bc i was too busy counting the fucking things they told us to. i want to SCREAM. this makes me feel so stupid and helpless lolllll #<- as i was typing that we were learning about the chance of survival if you are hit by a car at different speeds! bc that’s relevant 😍😍😍😍😍😍 #anyways. my therapist was telling me stuff abt how i need to remember this isn’t targeted for me and i need to regulate my nervous system an #and how to calm down when it triggers me but i forgot everything she said literally 5 hours ago and now im here freaking the fuck out so. 🥰

[lonely--seeker]

Saw op red film today and firstly, I enjoyed the movie, really did. Secondly tho, why do I feel there was so much, so much, potential lost?? Can I trust fanfiction will fix this?

#im just sad bc we didn't get to see the strawhats interacting together. fights were sick. music was sick too! #but i want to fucking see them interacting. how can i stress this enough. let them fucking hang out pls we already dont get that in canon #there were so many characters that changed nothing for being there or were there just as plot devices/fanservice #which is cool I loved to see Brulee again. but i wanted to see ;;;;;;;; the strawhats ;;; ;;; pretty please ;; #im just really not vibing with shanks-uta and yasopp-usopp parenting honestly. #i liked the moment Usopp said something along the lines of #alsp unrelated to the movie but i watched it subbed. and kid you not the subs were ughhhh not great. #i may be too used to fan subs but cOME ON #i think they simply took the dubbed script and slapped it down and it defeated the whole purpose #i want to know what they are actually saying. not an adaptation of that. #but that might be my picky ass. because if i keep complaining people will think i hated the movie when in reality #it's;; complicated;;; #yes i had a good time watching. but i was left longing for them to be more brave and write something not cliche? if that makes sense?? idk #i haven't really been in touch with what people said abt the movie so now im curious #it jad it's ups and downs and in the end. im probably asking for toouch out of it * sigh * i need to sleeep #tag hell #me blabbering #one piece #op spoilers #op red #one piece red film #spoilers

[gaylittleguys]

I feel so sorry for The Boss. You get your child taken away from you practically at birth, and you’re forced to give up your agency, your choice, your body, your service up in the hopes that your child is going to be okay. And you never get to see them or talk to them and you have to spend every day thinking about them and wondering how they’re doing, and if you can help them at all. You even have to kill your lover to protect them. You give everything up for a child you think you’ll never see, and think about them every day for two whole decades. Then finally you get to meet him and he’s just sooo fucking annoying you can’t stand his ass. Embarrassing.

#not even TOUCHING upon also training your adoptive son who ends up fucking up your whole thing and message #and your cringe fail actual son falls in love with HIM and dedicates his whole life to fucking everything up on purpose even harder #and you just gotta look down from heaven/up from hell/wherever you end up and watch all that happen #like she had to give her whole life up for the chance to ask them to be better and be free of the choices she had to make #and they’re like ok got it war and conflict forever thanks mom 👍 #embarrassing #I love her so much #at least 1/3 sons wasn’t a disappointment #not bad odds #mgs

[whileyoureinschoolidothisallday]

How Touya pictures you as a villain as Hex: Aww, I don't really know how to fight! I don't even like it, it's not my thing. I just wanna be support! It's dangerous for me to be on the field. Do you really think I could do it? Would you help train me me, Touya? 👉🏽👈🏽 Then we can be a team together! UwU

How you actually were as Siren, stalking your targets down the halls covered in blood from wheels to wrist: Daisy, daisy, give me your answer, do~ I'm half-crazy all for the love of you...~ =)

#hex!fic #this discrepancy is mostly because he only knows you as the ex-villain civilian who he literally watched have a panic attack over blood #and I address that #like he hears you SAY you were a villain once and obviously stalks your information and finds the incredibly gorey scenes you'd leave #because you were fucking crazy #but it does not compute in his head and he chalks the majority of the violence up to your sibling(s) influence #because as violent as you were the rest of your family is WORSE and that is true #which fun fact!!!!!!!!!! Is why he erases them in the fantasy!!!!!!! #You're not really Like That you're just a poor victim of circumstance and bad family influences!!!!!!!! #just like him!!!!!!!!!!! #and honestly the more I think about it the more I feel like touya might've liked you less if he knew that right away #which is SUPER funny cause I hc that if it was in any other direction #like if he met you as a villain while he was a villain #or you were a villain and he was a hero #he would be all over you #but now he has such an innocent almost victim perception of you that it would take him awhile to wrestle with the opposite being true #very meme voice: wait. you were a villain on purpose? like cause you wanted to? #between the inferiority complex and his unacknowledged misogyny I especially feel like it would bug him that you are SUCH a better villain #like efficiency wise #like you were literally RAISED in this in the ways he was supposed to be raised in heroism #like self-taught vs traditionally trained type shit #and I think it would bother the hell outta him #you don't even have a quirk but you have a bigger body count than him #what do you MEAN #I hope I get a chance to write that internal struggle it would make good relationship drama