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absolutelyinvinciblebritishgent · 4 years

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What if the Sound Trio survived and became Leaf ninjas?

Headcanons under the cut (bitch, it’s a lot of headcanons)

~ Chunin Exam Finals/Invasion~

Dosu was shown to be suspicious of Orochimaru because of the whole Sasuke/curse mark thing and seemed like he wasn’t wanting to be a part of Orochimaru’s shit anymore so he’s the one who realizes something is up

Rather than face Gaara he somehow finds out about sand’s allegiance with sound (overhearing Baki and Kabuto on the way to Gaara, eavesdropping on Orochimaru [because, again, sus], etc...) and that’s what pushes him to defect from sound (also how he manages to live)

Dosu, Zaku, and Kin aren’t necessarily close, but in the anime Dosu did sort of say he was gonna get revenge on behalf of Zaku for what happened to his arms so there is a sense of something there (whether it be friendship, camaraderie, or just wanting to stick together to survive... idk) and Dosu tells his teammates what’s up and convinces them that they gotta GTFO

Zaku is a little more difficult to convince because why would Orochimaru do that to him? He saved Zaku from being a street rat, he gave Zaku power

Dosu ain’t having it and is like “if you wish to stay behind then that is your decision, in the end it is better for us to not have to carry any dead weight” (obviously referring to Zaku’s inability to do anything because of his arms)

Dosu then proceeds to tell Zaku how he no longer serves a purpose without his arms and he was nice enough to still want to take Zaku with him, Orochimaru would not be so kind

Zaku is upset because he knows Dosu has a point and they all leave

They (read: Dosu) decide that their best chance of survival is staying in Konoha because, the minute they leave, the sound village/Orochimaru will be gunning for their asses and also they’d be missing-nin, so others would try to kill them too

But what can they do to assure they don’t get imprisoned or killed due to having worked under Orochimaru? Rat out the sound village and give all the information they know/found out about the invasion and sand’s involvement

Third Hokage is a cool dude and also was Orochimaru’s teacher so he knows the kind of power this bitch can have over people which is why he agrees to let the sound trio stay and have them watched by Anbu

Dosu does not participate in the chunin exam finals because witness protection, or something

The invasion still happens because Orochimaru ain’t stupid. His “pawns” are nowhere to be found so it’s likely they’re betraying him, so obviously he makes changes to the plan

Dosu, Kin, and Zaku do not participate in fighting off the invasion because, uh, super strict house arrest orders???

Third Hokage dies and this FREAKS the trio out because a) oh shit Orochimaru actually did it and b) we’re only allowed to be here because of him, so what’s going to happen to us

Council is deciding what to do with them and has them staying hidden/as they were, but what’s more important to them is finding Tsunade and having her take over as Hokage so the trio are just anxiously chilling

Tsunade is Hokage now and she decides to let them stay because they turned their backs on Orochimaru and also she trusts Sarutobi’s judgment on letting them stay initially, but they are still going to be watched by Anbu to be sure

Naruto and co. find out about the trio and they are PISSED because “not only did you try to kill Sasuke, not only are you from the village that attacked us, not only did you work for Orochimaru but you did nothing to defend Konoha during the invasion. If you want to be a part of this village then you should have helped”

Tsunade tells these bitches to simmer down. They were under Anbu house arrest. She’s Hokage and they need to respect her decision. Also Zaku, let’s fix your arms.

~Sasuke Retrieval Arc~

Everyone is immediately on the trio’s ass because “we knew you couldn’t be trusted”

Tsunade has to tell everyone to stfu again

The trio want to go (to prove themselves) and feel they can be of assistance but Tsunade is like Catherine of Aragon because she says there’s no no no no NO WAY. It’s already a dangerous mission, it might be more so for them because Orochimaru is probably after their heads for betraying him and knows all of their skills

Everything about the arc is the same until the point where Shikamaru, Kiba, and Lee need help. Instead of the Sand Siblings being the ones to arrive it’s the sound trio

Zaku saves Kiba... mainly because I imagine them being friends once the trio are accepted and I just want this to be the beginning of their friendship. How he saves him idk because I’m not creative when it comes to fights

Kin saves Shikamaru. Again idk how. Zaku’s slicing sounds waves make more sense here because they work similar to Temari’s fan but I want it to be Kin because kunoichi vs. kunoichi, genjutsu vs. genjutsu, and also the idea of Kin saving the guy who beat her in such an embarrassing way does something to me, but also is a sort of redemption? I just want this battle to show off how skilled Kin can be because she was very underutilized and kinda weak in the original story and I love her so much, she deserves to do cool shit. So let her outsmart Tayuya and, in a way, she is outsmarting Shikamaru because he had no more plans to fall back on

Dosu saves Lee. Again, idk how and, again, I think Zaku’s slicing sound waves would be better here because they can keep Kimimaro (a close range fighter) at bay but I guess seeing Dosu and Kimimaro throwing hands would be cool. And then you have that redemption moment with Lee because Dosu kicked his ass in the forest of death and now he’s saving Lee!

After the mission, despite its failure, the trio are accepted as leaf shinobi and are introduced to their new sensei: cue Anko crashing through the window with a big sign introducing herself again

Similarly to the moment when Naruto spoke out and Anko threw a kunai at him, Zaku gives a snide comment and Anko is immediately at his throat, and then she’s like “JK! But don’t say that again you little shit!”

Anko was chosen to lead the trio due to her past with Orochimaru and because of that she can better understand them

~Other Headcanons~

It took the Konoha 12 a while to accept the trio. The first ones to accept them were Kiba, Lee, and Shikamaru (duh) but also Choji and even Naruto. Choji became cool with them when he found out Shikamaru was cool with them because he trusts Shikamaru’s judgment, and despite originally trying to kill his teammate, Naruto accepts them because they came out and helped so that means they’re a-okay in his book. Neji was slightly taken aback but also accepted them pretty quickly. Basically, the retrieval team was like “yeah okay” and vouch for them.

The ones who took the longest to come around were Ino and Sakura because did y’all just forget what happened at the forest of death???

As I said, I imagine Kiba and Zaku being friends. Mainly because I feel they have similar personalities in the sense that they’re both pretty cocky, boisterous, and talk shit. I imagine them kinda being like rivals in the sense of they’re always trying to one up each other

Zaku is still not fond of Shino because of the whole bugs in arms thing so whenever Shino is around Zaku is just like “I hate your teammate” to Kiba

Kin/Shikamaru could potentially replace the Temari/Shikamaru relationship. Both Kin and Temari are very similar in the sense of being an ex-villain, being viewed as scarier/more intense compared to the Konoha girls, being older by a couple years, and they both lost (well, Temari technically won but we all know she lost) to Shikamaru. Because of this the Kin/Shikamaru relationship wouldn’t be all that different to how the Temari/Shikamaru relationship is shown

That being said I love the sand siblings and don’t want them gone and because of how similar I feel Kin and Temari are they become really good friends and Kin enjoys when Temari visits. They both make Shikamaru’s life hell though. Double Trouble™️

Also I said potentially because I like exploring the idea of Kin/Zaku or Kin/Dosu (:

Dosu and Shino actually get along really well (much to the dismay of Zaku). They’re the type of people where they can sit in silence with each other and it’s just chill. And when they have to work together they kinda have flawless teamwork and don’t even need to speak to know what the other plans on doing

Kin and Sakura actually get along now? They’re not best friends by any means but they can be civil and respect each other

Team Kurenai and Team Sand are the teams that the trio get along with the best/most easily tho

Kin cut her hair to her lower back. Cue everyone cracking jokes about Neji and Kin looking the same from behind. Kin stops tying her hair after that

The trio have really well trained ears because back in Otogakure they had to learn to pick up on the subtlest of sounds in order to spy on enemies and communicate at such a low volume that to any normal ear sounds like silence but to them the message is loud and clear

Because of this they’re all amazing singers (Dosu is the best tho because he has the best trained ear. Seriously, being able to tell what someone is writing based on the sounds of their pencil? Skills.) and everyone likes hearing them sing.

That being said, despite being from the land of sound they didn’t actually know any songs because the sound village doesn’t really do music. It was forbidden because no one is allowed joy in the land of sound. Jk. But it did have to do with depriving people of normalcy because Orochimaru was creating an army of followers

This little singing/music tidbit was discovered by Naruto and he took it upon himself to show the trio music. It wasn’t all good music, but it’s music!

Also, despite being the best singer, Dosu doesn’t really do it. Dude doesn’t even hum. He’ll only sing if Kin and Zaku start pestering or if Anko wants him to

The first (and only) time Kin and Zaku saw Dosu cry was shortly after they became leaf shinobi. Anko and Tsunade were telling the team how brave it was for them to leave Orochimaru and sound behind, and Anko especially complimented Dosu on taking him and his team out of that situation. Kin and Zaku had been trying to hold back tears and keep up their tough image but the minute they saw Dosu crying, not trying to wipe away his tears or hide them or anything they lost it

No one talks about their little crying session. It’s a secret

Despite getting his arms fixed by Tsunade, Zaku still has problems with them, especially his right one (I think that’s the one that got blown off) and needs to get them treated consistently. Partly due to the fact they he didn’t give himself all the time to heal after Tsunade fixed him because he went to help the retrieval team and, mainly, because of Orochimaru’s experiments. Like, essentially Zaku’s air tube surgery was actually kind of botched and, for lack of a better term, experimental, and is fucking with the nerves and muscles and chakra in his arms and kinda eating away at them. And the crazy damage he took from getting his arms blown off only fucked everything up more

Eventually Zaku gets a better version of his air tube in his left arm and has to completely replace the right arm with a cool prosthetic that lets him do stronger/cooler jutsus

Kin has combined singing with her genjutsu and has created a sort of mind control jutsu... I may or may not have gotten this idea while listening to Come Little Children and remembering that Sarah Sanderson would control kids with song

The trio think Sasuke is a fUCKING DUMBASS for willingly going with Orochimaru. Like, bitch we had to leave that no good asshole for the betterment of our lives and you just waltz out of Konoha and straight into his arms?! What is you doing Uchiha?!

#naruto #zaku abumi #dosu kinuta #kin tsuchi #anko mitarashi #team dosu #team sound #sound trio #otogakure #konoha #konoha 12 #naruto uzumaki #kiba inuzuka #shikamaru nara #fan art #my art #headcanons #so many headcanons #too many headcanons

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minatodilf · 5 years

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i was tagged by @teojida thank u king 🙌🏽

What was your last

Drink: vanilla coke 🙌🏽

Last phone call: work....

Last text: to my older sister, asking her to pick up food on her way home but she hasn’t responded so looks bleak kings

Last song you listened to: my brothers watching nge out in the family room and I’ve been hearing the theme song play a lot longer than it should be so i guess cruel angels thesis

Last time you cried: hmmm maybe a month ago? i don’t remember these things lol

Have you ever dated someone: unfortunately! i never listened to my friends when they told me he was shitty and creepy, wish I had!

Been cheated on: el em aye oh yeah!

Kissed someone and regretted it: big time, my dude

Lost someone special: not really

Been drunk and thrown up: yes

List three fave colors: yellow, red, orange! (Ok me too king)

In the last year have you…

Made a new friend: yeah!

Fallen out of love: yes!

Laughed until you cried: yeah

Met someone that changed you: yeah I guess u grow from ur mistakes so yeah?

Found out who your true friends are: idk maybe?

Found out someone was talking about you: lmaoo yeah

Kissed someone on your FB friends list: yeah I don’t have facebook

General

How many people on your FB friends list do you know irl: don’t have fb

Do you have any pets: we have two cats! Salem is a black cat and yeah he’s named after the one from Sabrina, my older sisters named him. and the other is bean, idk cat breeds but he’s pretty 😔 my brother had a blue budgie, his name was sasuke. yeah I know...it was embarrassing for a while ahdjshsj he got old and passed away recently tho

Do you want to change your name: i do, probably not to ash though. ill keep that as a nickname, idk what I’d change my name to

What did you do for your last birthday: euheheh my birthday was January, i went out clubbing with a group of friends for my 18th

What time did you wake up today: a little after 8:30am. Bc its school break rn it’s just me and my brother at home, our parents leave early for work and come home late so he woke me up to go get breakfast from McDonald’s. i had a sausage and egg mcmuffin with the hash brown and juice and it was soooooo good.

What were you doing at midnight last night: playing Final Fantasy X on the switch

Name something you CANNOT wait for: OHHH DUDE NEW ANIMAL CROSSING!!

Last time you saw your mother: uhh last night I think, i was still asleep when she left for work this morning

What is one thing you wish you could change about life: i wish my family was well off. i wish I could afford to pay next semesters uni fee to continue my degree, and my parents didn’t have to worry about it so much.

What are you listening to right now: the sound of nge from the other room and my brother occasionally yelling at the tv

Have you ever talked to a person with the name Tom: you know what, i don’t think I ever have

What’s getting on your nerves: thinking about money and the lack thereof lol

Most visited website: tumblr + youtube

Nickname: ash! my parents call me shortened versions of my actual name sometimes, but ash really click with everyone. Even my parents use it sometimes.

Relationship status: single 🤟🏽 recently broke up with my shit hole ex and whew who knew i was so blind and stupid!

Zodiac sign: aquarius

Pronouns: he/him

Fave tv shows: I don’t really watch tv but I like naruto so.

Hair color: it’s naturally black, i tried dying it blonde a while ago but it looked fucked so I dyed it back to black omg

Long or short: on myself I prefer short I guess? but just long enough for me to still look like a sasuke kinnie

Height: hnnhghgh 5’0

Do you have a crush on someone: mr minato the dilf supreme

What do you like about yourself: oh yeah being gay and trans is Super Sexy of me

Tattoos: oof yeah I got some but my parents still don’t know about them, the adrenaline keeps me going. I’d like a few more tho 👀

Righty or Lefty: righty!

First surgery: im pretty hardy i haven’t been to the hospital

First piercing: first was my ear lobes, i now have a lot more all in my ears tho. I’d like a couple more.

First best friend: we aren’t friends anymore. I used my sisters Facebook to look her up recently and she’s very openly homophobic so glad I dodged that bullet lmao

First sport you joined: yeah i was a ballet child, then i moved on to volleyball and then track briefly in high school

First pair of trainers: huh? What?

Right now

Eating: nongshim onion ring snacks, I’m a frequent at the asian market bc im always buying my onion flavoured ring snacks

Drinking: I had a bottle of water on my bed but I can’t locate it atm...

Listening to: bts’s idol and I’ve run out of skips on my free version of Spotify so I guess that

Want kids: not at the moment

Career: i would love to be an artist or a writer, something creative but like that’ll never happen lmao

Which is better:

Lips or eyes: hmm idk lips ig

Hugs or kissed: hugs

Shorter or taller: i kinda...like...being smaller so..

Romantic or spontaneous: spontaneous

Nice stomach or nice arms: yeah tummy is the best!

Sensitive or loud: hmmm I’m already very loud so maybe sensitive, we need a balance

Hook up or relationship: hook up bro I’m over relationships

Troublemaker or hesitant: troublemaker

Have you ever:

Kissed a stranger: yes

Drank hard liquor: yes

Lost glasses/contacts: yes

Sex on a first date: yea

Broke someone’s heart: not that I’m aware of lol

Had your own heart broken: man idk.

Been arrested: very close call but ultimately no

Turned someone down: yep

Cried when someone died: ye

Fallen for a friend: oh briefly back in high school but he was straight and made some homophobic jokes so like. I had no taste.

Do you believe in:

Yourself: hhhh he’s trying!

Miracles: mmmmmm no

Love at first sight: ehhhh yeah ok

Santa Claus: nope. My sister ruined it all for me early so.

Kiss on the first date: yea

Angels: ehhhhh idk...

i tag: @nbsoras @bosstheme @cishethiruzen @bayonettamutual @ochaiko @thelegendoftwink @dykexion

i know this is VERY long so of course u don’t have to do it if u don’t wanna ✌🏽

#whew that was long but fun #tagged #long post

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safetyqueenofhell · 7 years

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Uh, News?

((its ‘pume rants about life” time))

So uh...hi guys. Funny story. I started out this blog because I loved the headcanon, but was at first hesitant to because of my gender identity or rather, I felt shitty for putting the words in the mouth of a transgender character when I myself was cis. This is a feeling I’ve pretty much always had about the transgender community. I always liked to think myself supportive of this community, but because of a certain rhetoric that plagued me as a kid I never really felt as though I was allowed to relate.

My older sister was a bitch. I dont know if she is now, all I know is that she doesnt wanna feel like ‘the bad guy’ anymore so I’m not allowed to bring it up. She used to draw pictures of me dying in horrible painful ways and talk about how happy thinking of me being mutilated made her. She used to take pictures of me in the shower and show her friends. Eventually convinced mom to force me to watch her shower and let her sleep in my bed with me. Her reasoning to my mother was that she was afraid of serial killers and didnt want to be alone. What she told me was that if someone were to attack she wanted someone else for them to go after, and she loved mom, my dad, and my little sister too much to hurt them. I was expendable.

She also really liked yaoi. There was pretty much gay porn always on the search history of the family computer whenever I tried to look up kingdom hearts or naruto characters. She would causally joke with her friends that she she would trade me for a cute little uke brother in a heartbeat.

When I was 13 I realized I was totally into girls. I (very famously) announced over the dinner table that I was a lesbian while asking my grandma to pass me the potatoes in the same sentence. My older sister was furious. She’d take every opportunity to tell me that I was making it up. That I wasnt really a lesbian, and in fact I was a horrible person for pretending to be a lesbian and invalidating the real struggles of the LGBT community.

This is not the first time I would hear shit like this from her.

Also around this time I started bringing duct tape to school with me. Every day I’d sneak the tape into my backpack, then go to school and strap my breasts down in the bathroom. I didnt really know what it would accomplish, but I liked it. I liked seeing my breasts disappear under my shirt. It wasnt the same as being allowed into the boys locker room like I wanted, but it was close enough.

I started reading books about girls dressing up as boys going on adventures. Not just ‘Mulan’ shit (in fact I came to resent the movie because it is by far the most well known but also the worst depiction of the trope) but also Leviathan, Song of the Lioness, and to a lesser extent The Monstrous Regiment (which is hilarious & gay as all fuck 100% recommend) More then anything I wanted to pass for a boy, even before I knew what transgender was. I cut my hair, I wore the boys school uniform when I left home to go to boarding school, I fantasized about kindling a romance with my roommate. This wasnt to be, alas, (even tho Missa is a literal perfect human being and I love the shit out of her) but I did get to experiment with girls in the form of my first girlfriend ‘E’ and the girl who took my virginity, ‘C’.

When I went home for the first time it was like returning to the darkness. I didnt realize how much I hated my home until I went back that first winter break. I would talk about my experiences (And since I had 0 shame) would also talk about girls. My sister wasnt having it. She’d shut me down in front of my own parents, insisting that I wasnt Bi because she’d never seen any of my girlfriends. Mom wanted us to repair our relationship so she’d make me drive around the street in circles talking to my sister as she repeatedly beat me down.

The next couple of years at school were pretty much blended together. I became something of a “Come Out Kid” in that, for some reason, I was the first person a lot of people told when they started having homosexual or gender divergent thoughts. Particularly girls who didnt know they liked girls until they met me. Coupled with my sister’s abuse, this kinda gave me a fucked up sorta ego that makes other people uncomfortable to this day. I almost force myself not to believe so many people came out because it seems like it couldnt have happened, how could the disgusting leech of a person my sister convinced me I was have so many people be attracted to her? Even still, a fucked up multi-faceted ego is still very much an ago, so I had the confidence to date both boys and girls. I dont wanna get into it now but was also molested by both boys and girls. One of my best friends ‘A’ made her transition, and around senior year I began to suspect that I might be on the agender side as well. My other best friend ‘M’ told me that I only wanted to “Join A on the bandwagon” and I believed him instantly because that was the kind of fucked up person I was.

I came home for break one year and saw my little sister had no contact with any boys at 13, which I found strange considering me and my older sister only hung out with boys at that age. my little sister’s dance studio was run by an entire staff of lesbians who were always incredibly supportive of sexuality and self expression. I thought it only natural that if my sister were gay then she’d probably be open about it. I suggested it to my mom. she threatened to disown me. when i said that was homophobic, she called me a monster for daring to call her such a horrible word. No, she wasnt homophobic. what she was was a mother of a confused 13 year old girl, and would not stand for me trying to police her young, undeveloped sexuality by saying the word ‘lesbian’ in front of her.

That very same summer my older sister harassed me in a public restaurant making fun of the time “grace thought she was gay but was only faking for attention” and I looked into my mothers eyes as she said nothing.

Cut to freshman year of college my older sister was graduating, and I was experimenting with my gender. My sister was ironically a psych major and graduating that year. Since I was forced to care about her again mom tried to force us to love each other by (you guessed it) more stuffing us in a car together and driving around. I admitted that I might be a boy. When I talked about wanting to look and fit in with boys she said if I ‘need to rely on societal norms to justify yourself you’re an anti-feminist and hate yourself for being a woman’ when i said that it just felt right she once again demanded ‘proof’ and went in idiotic circles from there until she slammed the breaks and said she said that I just hate myself and am desperate to be anything other then myself and I’m incredibly pathetic for doing so. She then said that if I were really a boy she’d love and accept me. But I’m not. she said that she forgives me for being such a horrible little sister and its high time i love myself too. she went on to say I’ve been faking my mental illness and I’ve always hated her for no reason and im ruining her life blah blah blah whatever.

Tragic backstory unlocked you get it.

Cut to now. Cut to making this blog. Cut to having the upmost respect and adoration to anyone who is able to come out of the closet. Not disgusting fetishists like myself, real people with real problems to overcome. I loved trans marco and related to her greatly, and made this blog. but soon people started asking me questions. asking for advice. and how the hell could I help? i had no idea what it was like to be trans. All my life I had only pretended to be LGBT so boys would pay attention to me. what could I possibly tell them? I started to look up terminology. I started to read memoirs. I might be a horrible fetishist who spits on the struggles of people who suffer by my mere existence, but goddamnit if anyone is looking at this blog I’m going to do my best to help them through their struggles. I’d agonize for days any time i got an ask about trans issues, trying to make the wording perfect to make up for the fact that i was cis scum capitalizing on the ‘fad’ of trans issues.

and you know fucking what. everything i found. everything i read. all of it i related to. all of it validated me. I thought about it, wrote down my feelings, talked to friends, and pretty much everyone agreed that why the fuck would i even lie about something like this? what could i possibly have to gain?

this is a whole lotta rambling for a whole little payoff. I guess what I’m trying to say is that...like.

I think I’m a boy. I think I’ve always been one.

I dont know if thats the same as being MtF or where the divergence between the experiences lay but. Every time i get mistaken for male i just get this flower of happiness in my heart. thats literally the image that comes to mind. just. happy. happiness rushing through my veins like glittery as fuck happy.

Idk what I even hope to accomplish with this. maybe I hope that, since I cant really come out to my family, I just want someone to...witness me? i dunno. But, Trans!marco helped me, even though I dont share any of her internal conflicts directly. So maybe someone else is reading this too. maybe someone else has been told they’re a faker. maybe someone else’s mother accused them of just trying to ‘get a reaction’ maybe someone else heard that mother bragging to her friends at dinner parties about how brave caitlyn jenner is and patting herself on the back for supporting her. but thank you everyone who has sent me asks. Thanks to all of you. I havent been paying much attention to this blog, and maybe the hiatus is gonna go on a little longer, but thanks to all of you for sticking with me. I love all of you. bless.

-Pume

#not safety #but #i needa talk about this somewhere?#and honestly #this blog made me realize some thangs #abuse #tw: abuse #long post

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