#im not having a good quarantine at all

[dreamonminecraft]

I'm glad you all think I'm well articulated because I've had two bloody noses today, throw up in my mouth every time I get a notification, haven't left my bed in 6 hours, eaten anything since yesterday afternoon, or brushed my teeth. So. Sunshine and rainbows everybody I'm doing great.

#I've calmed myself down a little bit and made moral qualms with myself but I'm still very much in the trenches emotionally #the fact that so many people are validating my feelings is making me feel a lot less alone #tw eating disorder -> #honestly ever since dream posted the picture of his scars it really triggered me #I was very anorexic during quarantine and i had gotten better #im not doing as bad then as i was then but this whole situation is so mentally taxing that nothing even smells good #things are tough. I can't lose this. and maybe some of what im saying is copium but it's really all i have left

[yesokayiknow]

yknow things could be worse. we could’ve had a glee covid 19 plot

#glee #im literally shaking thinking about this #you KNOW they'd do can't touch this as a zoom performance #queen's i want to break free as it intercuts between all of them alone in their bedrooms #they think blaine has covid so kurt sings i'll cover you from rent outside his window #idk how schue would be inappropriate while unable to touch anyone but by god you know he'd try his best #all of rachel's masks have gold stars on them #finn broke quarantine to go stay with rachel and everyone thinks he's an idiot for it except rachel who thinks it's romantic #santana pretends to be sick but actually she's just trying to ditch do any homework #artie believes it's all a government conspiracy and refuses to quarantine #brittany is absolutely flourishing and hasn't noticed anything different #rachel: i can't get covid who knows what it would do to my voice!; kurt: also you could die; rachel: if i lose my voice i'm as good as dead

[bug-kid-benny]

How's rain world treating you? Apart from the everything wanting to eat you

ITS SO FUN and challenging in the absolute best way possible!!! its my total favorite game rn i play basically every day im on my like 90 somethingth cycle in subterranean im having a blast and i only got mild ish spoilers from getting super excited and browsing through tumblr

i dont really know where im going right now but my main goals are explore as much as i can and befriend the scavengers (and also get better at the controls)

gourmand and survivor doodle from while i was in class today :D

#i have died so many times #i love this game so much #i dont know how many areas i have left to find out about #ive been in uhh #outskirts and industrial and chimney canopy and shaded citadel and farm arrays and subterranean in that exct order i have the game open rn #i know theres like a coastline or somthing for me to find #also like 20 or so of those cycles maybe more were spent in this one part of industrial zone right by the like quarantine area lock thingy #with the pit to jump over #not a very good place to be #and i was so new to everything i would get so close to the amount of thingamajig cycles symbols thingies to have lived to pass the gate #and then die all the way back down to zero again lol #im moving a lot now though its great i wanna fill out the entire map at some point #idk why i put these all in tags #benny rainworld happenings

[britneyshakespeare]

you know what it is. i talk about how vain he is and how he only talks about himself and that is the impression a lot of people have of him and it is the impression i favor leaning towards. he has a very coded way of self-disclosure; he often seems like he's trying to impress people but i know him to be not-the-most-assured in a lot of ways. when i first complimented him on his poetry and told him how much i liked a few pieces (and i loved some of what i read before i knew his last name, so when i read his poetry i did not assume the person whose poetry i so loved was, well, that retired male model i met in passing every now and then). when i told him that. he was very moved by it.

and i do talk about how vain he is; i do say he only talks about himself; but every now and then when he does say something about me it is not at all hidden that he does admire me. some of what he says that seems to coded to impress me or to get my validation, i know he is doing this towards me because he thinks im this smart poetry girl. and i am? i am that, he's not wrong. i think it makes me feel hopeless to think that he really does respect me and care what i think of him because i'd rather he didn't. i'd rather him be this charming but shallow pretty boy which i think he has been seen as by a lot of people throughout his life. despite that he is hardworking, despite that he has (or at least tries very hard to have) an intellectual side. perhaps what he says about himself is so often coded to please me even while it is fishing for my attention, and i want to see that as a reflection of his own self-regard but i don't know that it is.

i don't know that it's not, but i don't know that it is either and as neither of us is very frequently vulnerable with the other, it's not fair for me to say which is the case. or even that there's a "which" like it can't be both. i don't know that he admires me; i don't know that he sees me as this girl who is (or at least used to be) very charmed by him. i do know that he always comes to me and asks me about poetry because as far as he's told me, i'm the only one who has ever cared about his. for all i know that could also be bullshit, but then why should i assume it is either? i'm quite unfair to him in my assessments of him. i do have to admit, he has never actually seemed to have a disrespectful or unfair assessment of me.

#he told me today i was 'exquisite' basically #i think sometimes he's very shocked by my general lack of ambitions. while i do have all this artistic knowledge #i'm like some sort of poetry guru to him. which does make me laugh a little #his estimation of me is overstated. #im a fairy to him! a strange creature he doesnt understand #like how rochester used to call jane eyre a fairy. except we're both pretty good-looking #tales from diana #i dont call myself good-looking often either but i know other people see me as that. so. it is what it is #thats another piece of the puzzle is back in 2020 during quarantine he was... well he still is #but he WAS initially very flirty w me and sort of asked me out 'if we ever get out of this' (quarantine) #whether he sees me as some pretty smart girl who's 8 years younger than him. well. #thats probably exactly what he sees me as #although im not pretty enough or smart enough. or hell even young enough anymore #god we're both old now. #i do promise you reader i won't marry him

[pepprs]

ok so. i found out that i was exposed to covid and i just got a pcr test and now i am waiting for my results in the garage and i will be here for 8 hours until the results come in and my headache feels better but i was quite literally exposed and i am trying not to have an anxiety attack.

#purrs #apparently the person i was exposed to wasn’t contagious when we met (wednesday) and they tested positive yesterday so there’s a good chance #that i didn’t get it and that they got it like #on thursday or something but like. oh my godddddd this is so fucking bad and my mom is pissed at me and i might’ve ruined everything and put #all her september plans on jeopardy and i want to explode so bad and it’s hot in here and i have to pee and my family is fucking freaking ou #out and im freaking out too like we literally do not have any private rooms in our house where someone can quarantine so we are all fucked #if i got it and im going to jump off a cliff rn. lol

[decideroffacts]

My experience with long term RPs is that unless you're super fucking lucky, is that it Dies. it doesnt really get a real ending, it just dies; people just stop being active because they get bored or they get busy or they have better stuff to do (which I can't blame them for). And at that point if you want to give it a proper ending you're gonna have to make some sacrifices. The story's gonna have to be shit, and there's not much anyone can do.

 Like with this one RP I was in, when it ended I was just seriously, deeply dissatisfied with the ending. It sucked bc I loved my character and I loved everyone elses' and I loved hanging out with them OOC, but a lot of people left or couldn't be there enough bc of personal shit and so the ending just had to suffer since so many important characters were no longer available.

 The ending sucked and I loved it and it was horrible and it was beautiful and it wasn't what any of us wanted it to be and it didn't say what we wanted it to say and it didn't end how we wanted it to end. But like if we didn't end it, it would have just rotted in time, doing nothing, forever. And that would've sucked even more than a shitty finale, to see something we put so much time and care and love into just like, sit in some sort of weird limbo forever, never ending but never quite going anywhere either.

Yeah, the ending probably could have been a lot better, and most of us had no control over it (it was up to the host), but we worked with what we were given and I still can't help but love it even for its flaws. Which is how I feel about Wilbur's finale stream kind of? Even if it isn’t really the same as a private chat RP. In a way, for me at least, it was kind of like "Let's have a little fun before it’s over. Even if it won't be perfect."

#Dont get me wrong im still unhappy about its flaws #im just happy to have experienced any of this #glad to have something i can share with people #im not very active cause of my social anxiety but like the people here still mean something to me even if i cant talk much #i guess a private chat rp and a scripted rp shown in front of 100s of thousands of people isnt entirely comparable but i #hope the post made sense #i love this shitty ass server and i'll never stop loving it even if it ends horribly and everyone dies and we all hate it forever #i feel like ive been so alone the past 4-5 years. and then 2 years of quarantine just took what little i had left #but dream smp (and the people i know because of it) made it a little bit bearable you know #i hope whatever theyre planning next is good and if its not Well maybe im okay with that #rbs off but feel free to leave replies^_^

[southislandwren]

oh boy school tomorrow! I missed 8 classes. I missed 2 work shifts. I missed 2 exams and a quiz. I have an essay due and I don't know when. I have accounting homework due tomorrow. I have a lab report due tomorrow. I have 2 days of lab to complete in 1 and I work immediately after lab (so can't stay after). I woke up at 10am and my first class tomorrow starts at 9 which means I have to be up at 7:45 and there's no chance I fall asleep before midnight tonight

#i'm kind of hoping i test positive tomorrow morning so i don't have to deal with all this #at the very least just tomorrow so I can skip my long work shift and still be able to take my exams on friday #if i miss tomorrow all i'd miss is a quiz and ofc 3 more fucking classes #edited to say no nevermind bc i have to take a quiz AND an exam tomorrow. please test negative thank u <3 #but im still symptomatic so we'll see. maybe i'll be positive maybe these are just lingering symptoms #the problem is that my insurance doesnt cover covid tests and they cost 15 bucks each #which is a lot when you have to get 2 or 3 at a time AND you have to get groceries today too #but i think i'll be fine because dad gave me extra money with my rent money and my first paycheck should be coming soon #it sucks that i mindlessly scrolled the entire quarantine bc now its ending and im like. i havent made music or played that much video game #and now its back to the grind and i got this vacation and it wasnt even good for me #covid post #good news though we can retire the covid post tag and honestly i felt like i posted a very normal amount #okay. gotta make some quizlets and email some teachers

[mis-calculated]

I'm so angry at myself for how little I have done in the first four weeks of this semester and every day I keep being like, "this is going to be the day that I reverse my path and start being a decent student" and then every day instead gets used up simply trying to survive

#i dont know how to dig myself out #i have so much shame and embarrassment that it makes me sick to my stomach every day #i just want to be a good and responsible student like alyssa so bad and i dont know how to get there #everything is going by too fast #all my teachers hate me #i cant breathe #why cant i get my stupid fucking brain to get back on track and stop flunking #i hate that all i can hear in the back of my mind these days is the voice of rob haskins telling me im a disgrace of a music major #im just so embarrassed at my existence right now #quarantine vents

[satoriberry]

i think getting into politics at a young age has ruined me a bit.

#berry.rambles <3 #idk i thought it would a good thing mostly to show my support for marginalized groups and yeah i dont regret but i feel like im spending- #too much time worrying over things i have 0 control over and can't even change yknow #and like im sometimes the literal incarnation of the sjw meme yknow #i think i should distance myself from them for a while #cause yknow at 16 being socially aware is one thing and trying to get into political debates is another and i think its taken a toll on #my mental wellbeing #as well as my focus and concentration #wahhhhhh #ITS ALL BECAUSE OF QUARANTINE 2020 I HATE THIS

[thesingingrevolution]

i have yet to find a song i relate to more

#im not cool and im not smart #however since 2021 i have learned to parallel park 😃 #this is literally so good #especially cause i was still in quarantine era when it came out #and like #i was gonna finish my junior year #with no direction at all #i love it #olivia rodrigo #need to listen to her new song #Spotify

[meaganfoster]

x

#hm maybe languishing in bed for 2 weeks straight isnt normal. who knew #whack a mole game i loved to play back during quarantine: laziness; executive dysfunction; or depression? #except my brain is like. astoundingly blank nothing to send up echo vibes at all forget bad vibes. so depression is looking v unlikely #anyway incident number 7483 of local girl talking to exactly 2 ppl over the course of 14 days due to i dont want to make human contact lmao #not lonely not beloved but a secret third thing: periodically non corporeal #point is now i actually have to finish and turn in work in the next 12 hours after spending a ridiculous amount of time doing fuck all #AND interact w acquaintances i need to make a good impression on (read: mask around) while im at it. kms #apparently if you exist that means doing more than watching actors do their jobs very very well in the form of tv shows. disappointing info

[hugoweavingbaskets]

Just had to euthanize one of my fish aghghggghhgghgghhgh. This is the first time Ive had to do it and it was quite unpleasant haha. I tried to incorporate the clove oil slowly over 5 minutes like the internet says but she was gasping at the surface so I feel like i did it wrong.

I'd been putting it off because I felt like doing it meant I didn't do enough to save her but there's no way she wasn't suffering

Get some rest little one 💙

#wdip #wdip fish #she was really sick #looked like the fish version of what chronic wasting disease does to deer #really hard to watch #i have to leave her in the bucket for a half hour to make sure shes dead and then im gonna sanitize all that equipment #i wish i could have done more for her but she was really struggling #hoping thisll give her some peace #pet death #hey so um this week sucks #id like another one please #on the plus side this clears up my hospital tank so i can start quarantining some corys #the ground isnt frozen solid so thats good #i know my Corys have gotten more anxious since the last one died #i assume it died #i have no idea where it went #overnight it went from 5 to 4 #anyway adding more corys will help them feel safer so this is good to have that process started

[asclepias-lavendula-nyctanthes]

can you tell im in a state

#[vent in the tags] #it's strange #in some ways loosing my dad has been easier to process than having 'just some guy' who i watched on youtube die #i knew about my dad long before #i knew exactly how bad/good he was doing #i knew long before that he wasn't going to be around for long #and i was able to talk to people #so many people reached out from my community #but when i heard technoblade had passed i had no-one i could really talk to #i'm not really /in/ the mcyt community #like i don't know anyone there personally #and not alot of people i know IRL are going to understand the nuance of the situation #like i don't even know how i'd begin explaining it to them #being able to talk to people - even if it's just telling them im sad and /why/ - has been an important part of the healing process for me #so having it absent makes it that much more difficult to move on #binging all of techno's streams while drawing was literally all i did while we were in quarantine due to my dad's delicate health #as well as during the weeks after my dad passed #but I haven't watched anything of his since that last video #(i've also been thinking about how it's november - the month set aside by the church to pray for the dead #which has making my thoughts and feelings more intense

[muddi-gutz]

having covid has legit made me suicidal again omfg

#i feel like such a failure today #i lost my good pair of glasses and i haven’t cleaned barely at all #and i only have a few days left to quarantine before i have to go get tested again #muddi thoughts #i cant stop crying which is making me cough which is making me cry more #and my stupid cat gets into everything and won’t stop being annoying #honestly im sure he grabbed my glasses and took them somewhere #since he likes to do that #but i really wanna find those glasses bc if i have to wear my old ones to work and then have ppl ask if i got new glasses only for me to #explain what really happened im going to lose my mind

[bread--quest]

It's 2012 somewhere. Welcome.... to Night Vale Tumblr.

👁️ nvcr-official

Hi guys! I'm Intern Sarah! Excited to be joining you all!

👁️ nvcr-official

To the friends and family of Intern Sarah, she was a good intern and social media manager, and we are sorry to see her go. We will work to find a new intern as soon as possible.

83 notes

🦉 dark-owl-records

CALL OUT POST FOR CECIL PALMER

hes gotten away with shit for too long and im sick of it. tl;dr horrific intern mistreatment with no compensation, mountain denier, homophobic

keep reading

❌ number-one-moonhater Follow

Hey uh. Aren't you a company account? Why are you posting this

🦉 dark-owl-records

L + ratio + god forbid women do anything + your music taste is trash

🙈 seesomethingsaynothing Follow

Isn't Cecil literally gay?

🦉 dark-owl-records

he's homophobic

🪼 jeebyfish Follow

he has a husband...

🦉 dark-owl-records

yeah and he won't fucking shut up about it

2,500 notes

🤫 cecils-private-blog

Carlos hasn't liked any of my woodcarving posts in THREE DAYS!! I'm so scared what if he's going to break up with me :((

👁️ nvcr-official

Cecil he's your husband he's not breaking up with you. also this isn't a private blog you just put private in the url

🤫 cecils-private-blog

HOW DID YOU SEE THIS

4 notes

🏜️ sandeater Follow

tamika flynn spotted in ralph's dairy aisle "slaying" the milk

🦂 scorpiansscuttle Follow

op i know this is a joke but one time i was in the ralphs dairy aisle and there was some butter up on a really high shelf and someone said "don't worry, i'll get it" and i turned around and it was fucking tamika flynn

☁️ average-weather-enjoyer Follow

fake story :/

📚 isurvivedthesummerreadingprogram

No it's true I was there

🚂 traintonowhere Follow

TAMIKA FLYNN??

🏜️ sandeater Follow

what the fuck is happening on my post

8,345 notes

👁️ nvcr-official

can you guys please stop sending cecil weird shit... i don't want to have to explain to my boss what a dilf is

27 notes

🐚 mariella-shella

Hey guys!! Sorry for the lack of posts recently! I entered a hole in the wall and when I got out I realized I didn't know how long I'd been in there, or where I was, or who I am, and I'm not sure that I'm still the person who entered that hole however long ago. Anyway, the normal posting schedule will resume as soon as I remember what my normal posting schedule was, and if I'm still the person who had that posting schedule!

🌪️ sandstorm-gf Follow

omg mariella!!! missed u so much girl glad ur back!

🐚 mariella-shella

i miss me too

42 notes

😎 Anonymous asked: Response to the homophobic allegations?

🎙️ cecilpalmer

Huh??

🎙️ cecilpalmer

@nvcr-official What does this mean? Is it new slang?

👁️ nvcr-official

uhhhh dont worry about it buddy

50 notes

🧤 missy-mittens Follow

hey guys im in quarantine for eating wheat and wheat byproducts uh...send asks?? i might be in here for a while lmaooo

🧤 missy-mittens Follow

oh lights in the sky its been 5 years since i made this post

☁️ glowcloudapologist Follow

how's it going op

🧤 missy-mittens Follow

i miss my family

506 notes

🐚 mariella-shella Follow

hey if anyone remembers anything about the person running this blog can you tell me? trying to recover the fragments of my identity from the void of memory lol

🥔 potato-enthusiast Follow

you were really hot

🐚 mariella-shella Follow

FUCK YEAHHHHHH

89 notes

🦉 a-weird-bird Follow

just a reminder that new residents of east night vale are fully welcome to interact with this blog!!!! you will not be harassed and any hate will be blocked. this blog is safe even if this town isn't sometimes <3

🌻 sunflowergirl Follow

This is so sweet, thank you so much! Just so you know, even though it's officially called East Night Vale now, a lot of people still call it Desert Bluffs! Just thought you might want to know :)

🦉 a-weird-bird Follow

i'm not calling it that sorry

🌻 sunflowergirl Follow

What??? Why??

🦉 a-weird-bird Follow

just kind of sucks. as a name

🌻 sunflowergirl Follow

?????????

170 notes

🐄

⬜️ kentuckymeatshower_deactivated11051983

what does this mean....

🌌 cece-xeze Follow

another great post from huntokar herself

16,683 notes

🚁 helicopters-in-your-area Follow

🌲 little-miss-ectoplasm Follow

you don't like pine cliff? 👻 oo ooo?

👁️ nvcr-official

NIGHT VALE SWEEEEEP

806 notes

😁 the-happy-smiler Follow

Hi everyone!! Since Twitter went down, I figured I'd try my hand at this Tumblr thing! I'm so excited to meet all of you!! Hope you're ready for some pictures of CENTIPEDES!! Feel free to AMA about the Smiling God!

👁️ nvcr-official

I

🦉 dark-owl-records

N

🎙️ cecilpalmer

T

📚 isurvivedthesummerreadingprogram

E

🙈 seesomethingsaynothing Follow

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🚂 traintonowhere Follow

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🦉 a-weird-bird Follow

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🌌 cece-xeze Follow

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🐚 mariella-shella Follow

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🚁 helicopters-in-your-area Follow

R

21,983 notes

#fake tumblr #fan: weird little town #i hope you all like this one i came up with it during a slow shift a few nights back and have been carefully crafting it to perfection #boss makes a dollar i make a dime thats why i invent fake tumblr posts on company time. as they say #unreality #< jic #wow look something original!! #im not maintagging this one im letting it find its own way in the world #go my little post. be free #long post #edit: FUCK I FORGOT NOTE COUNTS ON SOME OF THEM. EDITED THOUGH IT MAY BE TOO LATE