#into ripping their throat out w/ my teeth will def regret it lmao.

[jvzebel-x]

🦋

#maybe its the holidays having a negative effect on my psyche (or maybe the psychic damage being directed toward me #from various sources due to the season has finally hit lmao) #but i am feeling particularly foul today&have given up on trying to get past it for the night lol. #like i guess it didnt help that the day started w/ a doc who spent the entire apt talking to me in heavy sighs #as tho my many degenerative physical&subsequent mental health issues are a massive inconvenience to him lmao #but also my custom fucking harley davidson jacket was just stolen&i am extremely upset about it lol. #&like i am feeling particularly fucking angry at the fact that i officially own NOTHING objectively Nice #that i did not have to MAKE appealing or valuable-appearing myself. #the last few years have seen my camera laptop guitar and every console i had worth decent money either sold or stolen. #i have not owned a cellphone in years that didnt come sold as a burner from walmart. #i went so long w/o glasses that it took months to reorient myself so i didnt walk into walls. #i am feeling extremely incapable of being grateful right now&am trying desperately not to start foaming at the mouth #like a rabid animal but i gotta be real honest this shit is getting TOUGH&the next person unfortunate enough to tempt me #into ripping their throat out w/ my teeth will def regret it lmao. #i need some sugar&some sleep but i Want a large dose of adrenaline lol #ive never been super into hurting mySELF at all. my favoured form of self harm has always been #putting myself in intensely dangerous situations lmao. #so instead of going out looking for trouble i am going to smoke roughly two grams of wax #&kill the violence+bitterness churning in me right now lmao.