#iss not bad i guess 🤔

[wench-and-jezebel]

Howl’s Moving Castle Reaction:

Jezebel (@typicalopposite) reacts [with occasional asides by Wench (@scripted-downfall)]

Wench’s Note: the first half of this was reacting to the original.  About halfway through, we switched to the English dub.  We didn’t mark it though, so… fun ‘lil guessing game :)

Second Wench's Note: Also, the book comes up quite a bit and, while I've read the book before, it was a longggg time ago. If there are any false statements... apologies. Feel free to let me know (politely)!

– – –

Welp… Title already makes sense

Mood lady! I hate hats  *sigh*  I don’t have the right head shape

She just looks so grumpy

How did she not see that guard to begin with?  

Oh shit blobs!  Tf?

Oooo he flies

Ye this is normal… Just walking on air… As one does

No– No one– NO ONE SAW THIS???  Like… THEY WERE JUST FLYING  [He probably has some kind of glamor up tbf.  Or he just… Doesn't care.]   ☠️☠️☠️☠️  [He's a bit of a show-off, tbh]  I would be too tbf if I could just fecking fly

The fucking men just be popping up everywhere

Blobssss  [Blobs]

Wait she’s the old lady right?  [Ma'am, I say nada]

Le gasp

Well… damn

Bruh.  

BRUH!  SEE IF I WOULD HAVE WAITED TWO SECONDS!!  EVERYTIMEEEEEE!!!

I feel ya, Sophie, I feellll yaaaaa

She is handling this…. Surprisingly well  [Perks of magical realism, tbh; they know wizards exist, and they know abt the witch, and-]  Fair!

Oh noooo!

☠️☠️☠️☠️ A 90 year old … You don’t say

Poor Sophie 🥺🥺🥺

MOOOOD SOPHIE!!!  ISS ME. And my kids are the witch 😭 they made me old

Ma’am… you’re old. Maybe hiking a mountain is not a good idea  [She gotta go on her trademark Studio Ghibli quest]

Le gasp! A scurrrcrow

[Did you see what he's carrying]  Well damn 🥺  [Man Scarecrow brought her a cane]  That’s wholesome

“Can you bring me a house…” And he left… Scarecrow: I gotchu ol lady

[He knows where to find her one… He done brought her a house]  😭😭😭

IT’S GONNA SIT ON HER

Oh, or not 🤣

Jumppppp Sophie

[Turnip-Head brought her her shawl :)]  💕💕💕 I love him  [You gonna love the next anthropomorphic being more]

Ooooo I see fire 🙂

[In case this hasn't registered, btw... she just invaded a wizard's home.  His very feared castle.  And sat down.  And stoked the fire.]  ☠️☠️☠️ Fair

Calcifer! (Casifer 🤔😂)

Ooop she ded  [This really is you… She fell asleep mid-conversation]  ☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️  MOOOD SOPHIEEEEE!  I feel ya boo! I feel ya

Ooooo that noooseee

A child 

I sat down and cracked like that ☠️☠️☠️ I feel like I’m resonating with this movie in the wrong way 😭☠️🤣  [Then the moral will resonate too]  I even have a shawl like that ☠️ [That... is not the moral]

So they are afraid of him but he’s not bad  [They are afraid of the Wizard Howl, yes.  BUT.  As I think is clear, they're not clear on who, exactly, Howl is]  Ahhh! I see.  Makes sense  [If you saw, Markl just answered messages for both Wizards Jenkins and Pendragon]

Giant house comes creeping down the road… I’d be scurrrd too… but I’m guessing a bit thing is not to judge by appearances

Oh damn

[Pay attention to Calcifer being cute]  I’m a DeMon…

The kids like… shit all I had to do was lay a pan on him

OH HE’SSSS HOWL  [!!!]  LE GASPPP

[Calcifer monch on eggshells :)]  THE NOISEEEE  💕💕💕💕😭😭😭🤣🤣🤣🤣  Meh oi eh

Imma eat my steak like that! If I stop responding … Hubby killed me (Kidding)

[Did I mention Sophie is just amazing?  She legit just invaded a scary wizard's house... and told him it was filthy... to his face]  ☠️☠️☠️🤣🤣🤣  Very true

Ooooof

Just know! Now my husband’s gonna expect me to watch anime in… not English… with him. And I full blame you 😤  [GOOD]  My brain be struggling to do it all [Get good]

Ancient sorcery! The worst kind

[Calcifer get bacon :)]  Me meh mi meh

[Dang, Sophie, be nice.  Calcifer told you that you couldn't talk about it alksdfj]  Women! They never listen 🤣

Oh shit! Ok lady strength

["A witch rages within"  Poor Calcifer :(]  Poor Calcifer indeed

He fly again

Grumpy

Markl’s too cute  [Buddy, whatchu hiding?]  Also true

Uh oh.  He ain’t there to not let her get carried away

Oh SHIT IT’S THE BOYS BATHROOM

[He's so cute :)]

SCARECROW  [He's called Turnip, the Turnip-Head actually. According to Sophie.]

BRUH That seems not sturdy  [Ma'am, stop overthinking the magical castle]  Shhhh  [No]

Ahhh I seee

🥺🥺🥺  Wench this better have a happy ending ‘cause, minus the curse, it’s too happy  [Hmph.  I say nothing]  *opens google* try me Wench  [You can't multitask that much and we both know it]  *tells husband to open google* TRY ME — er, US — Wench

[Literally as we speak, you're missing that Howl is a bird]  Oh shit!  Howl is a bird!  [alkdsfjlakdf no shit]

Oh them toes

There is so much 😭😮‍💨  Sooo much happening

[You don't seem to have caught that she was young again]  I– I didn’t 😭  Is she young when she sleeps?  [She was young when he checked on her as she slept, yes.]  Bruh the witch is a biiiiitch! What kinda curse is thatttt  [I didn't say what was going on; I said it was what happened.  Shush and watch]

BLOB  [Blob]  BLOB

“AHHHHH!!!”  [You remember your prediction about Markl not paying attention when she went cleaning?]  YES- OH NOOOOO  [There ya go… I love this lil drama queen]

P- poor ☠️☠️☠️ poor howl  [And btw… when I say drama queen… ]  Buddy  [...I mean DRAMA QUEEN]  Budddy!!!!  [Man's calling on the Spirits of Darkness because of his hair dye]  ☠️☠️☠️☠️  ACk

Oooop- she’s looking younger! SO CONFUSING

[Turnip-Head brought her an umbrellaaaaaaa]

BUDDDY  [Did I mention “drama queen”?] 

Ah the rain too

Booty ☠️  [Ma'am, mind out of the gutter]  It wasn’t in the gutter.  It was on the screennnn!  [Bitch-]

[His room be prettyyyyy]  It issss.  It’s a lot though

[btw, this is the English dub for that conversation: (Sophie): "Howl, why is the Witch of the Waste trying to hunt you down?" (Howl): "She was once quite beautiful, so I decided to pursue her.  Then I realied she wasn’t, so, as usual, I ran away." For information purposes]

Hmmm, the sigh

[His hair is magical]  *Simultaneously* His hairrrr tho  [I want it]

Ooop-

THE FUCK IS THIS DOG?!?!  [I say nothingggg]  Full Metal Alchemist vibessss

OH GOSH THIS WOMAN

["Thanks to him, I've become a cleaning lady"  Bitch, that was either the Witch's fault or your own decision; you just kinda... announced it to Howl]  ☠️☠️☠️☠️  Right?!

Blobbbssss  [Blobs go bye-bye]  Blobs blobbed

Poor dog [*simultaneously* Poor pupper]  Is struggling  [SBC]  He’s like halpppp

Tf [Who carries a dog like that tho 😭]

The guardsss

I’m dying.  Well, actually THEY are dying.  Im laughing.  

That’s just not normal

[SHE SAID WENCH!  SHE USED MY NAME IN VAIN!]  ☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️

That would be me tho… Im tired for them  *sigh*

[Ma'am be lying to the Witch of the Wastes]

Ooooooof  [Feels bad.  Like... she's awful but also :(]

She is saying she is his mother? …  [Yeah, that's their strategy.  Well, Howl's strategy]  Ackles movie vibessss  [Ma'am, shush]  I can’t think of the name  [Devour.  But also no]  My brain has too many tabs open

Well damn  [:(]

[Sophie is awesome]  YESSS  [The pupper's eyes tho alkdsjf]

She be getting younger  

Ooop- Fangirl  [The Witch is also pathetically adorable alksdjf]

Oooop I might understand the curse now

[Oof- That bluff went badly]  ☠️☠️

Howl!

WHATS HAPPENING!  [That was the King.  The current plotline is that the King is demanding Howl (as Howl, as Jenkins, and as Pendragon) report for, essentially, a magical draft to fight in the war.  (This is magical realism, so magic is kinda commonplace.)  The first version of the King has been revealed to be Howl trying to bluff his way out of the war without breaking his oath to report when needed.  This got broken because a) she knew who he was already but b) the real King walked in and was like.  Hey.  Good?]  Yes! 🙂 thank you lool!

The dark hair’s nice tho  [I knowwwwww]  Noooo the witch ☠️☠️

This shit is crazyyyyyy  [Welcome to Studio Ghibli]  Fucking animeeeeee  [I'm now making you watch Spirited Away btw]

[Parallels to their first meetinggggg]  True lol

Ooooo scurrryy

They fly  [Many times]

Dog said he's out too

Oooo such a scurry demon... gets summoned with the heart  [OH SHIT THE MEANING TO THAT!!!  I'll explain later]

The fucking witch in the back thooo…  Just smiles

Ma'am, you know she's not his mom... stahp  [You really were scarred by Devour, huh?]  Yes

[They destroying his door :(]

[Markllllll  He’s so cute]

Bruh [Poor Calcifer :(]  The house just ate them.  I’m ded

That’s adorable…  Also, she younger!   Not young, but younger

So, is emotion a factor?

Ooooop-  She very young.  [Yup, even when awake]  She young and he's a bird… Ladyhawke vibes

🥺  [He has a nest]

[BRUH LKDSJF;LAKDSJF THAT WAS BATMAN.  Like, I knew English version was Christian Bale, but that was Batman]  It is loool… except bird man

Wait, Calcifer sounds familiar too  [He's Mike Wazowski, I think.  iirc]  Le gasp!

Double le gasp!  My emojis!  I cannot use them!

The- The house.  Has.  A tongue.

[BRUH THE MEANING!  Okay, I’ll explain shit later.]

So is she just.... good now?  [Her deal with the demon possessing her was broken… So kinda]  Ahhh

Sir!  He's so happy!  [I love him in this scene.  He's pretty :)]

THIS!  I love this scene! 

Jumpscare

Well damn

But also like… If the witch that cursed Sophie is now kinda irrelevant, how does the curse get broken?

[He made her her own shop :)]

Ooop- The voice changes are giving me whiplash  [It's helping you keep track of her age tho]

BUT HOW DOES THE CURSE GET BROKEN?!  [Bitch, just watch… HE MADE HER A WHOLE LOCATION OKAY PAY ATTENTION TO THE SWEETNESS]  I AMMM 💕💕😭😭

And young again

Kay 😍

His fucking hair length changes as much as her voice.  And appearance  [IT'S ALL MAGIC; JUST SHUSH]

[This be concerning buddy.  It feels like giving away your possessionssss]  😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢  (I found the emojis)  [Did I mention that all of my faves are apparently concerningly risky with themselves]  Maam your type... is concerning  [Shhhh.  I'm sure it doesn't mean anything]  Mhhmmmn

[Howl, buddy.  You won't fight in the war, but you just... fought in the war.]

Ooooop-

Tf???  Flying tadpoles  [The entities in these films are awesomely weird okay?  Like These Dudes (below)]  Awwwwww

Sophie, why are you pedaling, ma’am

Awwww

[ALSKDJF;LSAKFDJ THE MEANING!!!  Remind me to explain]  Ok lol

She gonna die… She's become too likable.  *Sighhhh*

Oh damn I thought they were sisters 💀  [I thought they were.  I think they were in the book.  It might be a nickname]  They were in the other verison

[She better not have hurt Calcifer :(  I forget if she did but.]

Le gasp  Well DAMN!  The bitch!  [I think her husband was a hostage, ma'am]  Aaaand? hmph

Awwwwwwwwww my heart

Bruh  [Oh shit she does seem to have hurt Calcifer :(]  Her whole personality changed  [She lost the demon, woman, so no wonder]  Yeah, but she was being so nice. What changed?  I thought losing the demon made her nice  [Oh, I see... Just... file it under things to discuss in endpoint if not answered]  Ok lol

[Blobs]  Blobs

Ooooof they are gonna have strange babies  [Ma'am, he's not actually a bird]

["You're alive!"  Shades of Westley/Buttercup: "If you want I could fly!"]

[She just put the cigar out on his handddd  😭]  Right?!?!

Edddieeeeee vibeessssss [*simultaneously* EDDIE-CODED :(  Okay, actually.  Fuckkkkkkkk maybe not SPN fusion.  Maybe ST fusion.]  😭😭😭😭😭😭  [I saw the sign and it opened up my eyes]  Well fuck now that songs stuck in my head  [adslfjaldskfj good]

Oh shit  ["Looks like Howl's in trouble" My dear, when is he not?]

["I preferred him as a coward"  *sigh* Don't we all?  (That's Steve's "Don't be cute")] 😭😭😭 Stapppp I cantttt  [*This* one has a happy ending tho]

I'm soooooooo confused with the witch lady  [I’ll explain (I think)]

Oh shit  [Moving castle go bye bye :(]  😭😭😭😢 Welp  Encanto vibes  [KLJALKDSJFLAKSFDJ HOW DARE]

This movie has fucjing unlocked umpteen fic ideas  [I KNOW]

This girl is gonna get him ded  [I'm saying nothing]  Le Gasp!  (Also gaddamnnnn this tablet)

[Calcifer et her hair to be stronggggg.]  Noooo the pecs!  When he was lifting the wood  [What is it with fictional haircuts being so cool, f'real] I knowwwww

Oooop-

[Poor Howl :(]

Well damn  [There's so much symbolism I'm gonna cry]

Like.... Maybe it's just me but I would have let her burn  [asdflkjaldskfj]  🤷‍♀️

[Pupper still doing stuff]

Um.  “What if I killed Howl?” They BOTH told you it would.  I caught it even in a different language.  Wot do you meannnn?!  [Trueeee]  Also gotta love how she doesn't care she killed Calcifer just that she might have killed Howl  [alskdfj]

[This be Very Important btw]

He’s gotta pee lady

[Oh look it's the Supernatural season 8 finale]  ☠️☠️☠️

Oooop- [He monch the star]  The wheeze tho  [From him or the dog ☠️]  The dog ☠️☠️

["Find me in the future"  Remember how the first thing he said to her was "I've been looking everywhere for you?"  :)]  Yeasssss

[Howl be not looking so good]

Burujhhhhh them feettttt!  That was meant to be spelled bad ‘cause… damn

[These scenes were very different in the book, btw; tell you at endpoint]

That.  That was easier than expected.  ☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️

[Honestly, I still feel like SPN would work better, but I could do a ST one-shot from just that other scene]

[No fuckkkkk but the SPN vibes are killing me; explain later]

Awwwww  [Calcifer be so happy :)]

[Turnip saved them!]  Yusssss  [But he not responding :(]  Nooooooo

Ahhhhh… yussssss again!

[Ma'am, it's not the heart that’s so heavy; you're sitting on him ☠️]

Well damn

“Big boy”  [LAJSD;LFKJADF]

[Doggo betrayed evil witch woman :)]

The wheezing

New meaning to the phrase “Hot lips”

Awwwww

[Oh my god my head is killing me with the fic planning... I'ma be ranting later] Yesssss

– – –

Jezebel: OH SWEET IPHONE DISCORD I MISSED YIU

Wench: Your typing Has Not Improved 

Jezebel: YOU KJOWBWHAT? 🖕🏼

Wench: You prove my point  (For those not aware of the editing process, btw, I do a cursory spell/punctuation check as we go most times, as much as I can do without falling behind.  The above^ would be a lot more common if I didn’t.  Y’all are welcome!)  ANYWAY.  Endpoint

Jezebel: That was adorable!!! I may just rewatch fully in English ☠️☠️☠️  And by may… I will ☠️🤣🤣  Eventually

Wench: asldkjfalkdsfj

Jezebel: But the fic possibilities are endlessssss omg

Wench: TSCH!  Ma'am, that's reserved for not-endpoint-reaction!! No spoilers!

Jezebel: I knowwwww.  Was just saying!  But omg ok explain the bipolar witch please!  Cause the amount of things that gave me whiplash in this movie… Were a many

Wench: I mean, I think her personality was just… shifting. She'd lost the demon, so she wasn't as corrupted by power, but she was still questing for Howl's heart. I do think that her proximity to power restored her a bit to her earlier self (and when she was smoking the cigar she apparently got from Suliman), which is why you noticed her being a bit more her at times when she was near Howl… but it's all within her normal character

Jezebel: Ok fair!

Wench: As for the things I was saying I'd explain now, btw... They keep foreshadowing the reveal about his heart.  Like, there are blatant bits (e.g. her earlier note saying something along the lines of "You who swallowed a falling star, o' heartless man, your heart shall soon be mine.")  But there were smaller things.  Like the Witch being so focused on Calcifer, talking so regularly about "oh, what a pretty fire."  I'm sure it was partly because the fire *was* pretty, but when you know that she was questing for Howl's heart, it's got a second layer.

Jezebel: Ooooo! I thought it was just her being old and senile ☠️

Wench: Also, the heart reveal renders other things increasingly significant too.  Like the metaphors of the Witch trying to get at his heart, and it burning her when she tried... something something she tried to steal his heart and control it but it didn't work, whereas Sophie had been connecting with it from the very beginning. Or him telling Sophie that the way to get HIS RING to work and lead her home was to call out to Calcifer with her heart... Which was his heart... Connect the dots :)

Jezebel: Oooooooooh 💕💕💕🥺🥺

Wench: Also, an interesting thing... Like I said, the book is quite different.  It's one of the few adaptations, actually, that changes A Bunch about the original story but I just... can't be that mad about it.  Because the story isn't the same, but it's awesome anyway.  

Jezebel: Ooooh? Interesting :)

Wench: Yup!  And one such example is that they explicitly state what's going on with Sophie.  Sophie isn't just this ordinary girl. Or, well... She is, but she isn't.  She was a hatter, like in the film, and she usually talked to the hats.  It's explained that she would tell them what their owners would be like as she made them.  (One example is when she tells a hat that its owner would have a heart of gold and someone would fall in love with them for it)

Jezebel: That’s adorable thoooo

Wench: And whatever she said would come true.  But she was also highly determined to be the Eldest Daughter. Which means she'd stay at home, tend to the business, never ever ever seek any adventure, etc.  So she has this magic... and nonetheless sets about using it to have nothing happen to her ever, quite without knowing it.

Jezebel: Ack!  So the exact thing she doesn’t want is exactly what happens ☠️☠️🤣🤣

Wench: Precisely!  And that magic is the explanation for a lot of what goes on in the story.  It's why the scarecrow comes to life, for example.  And it's also the reason she's able to separate Howl/Calcifer without either dying.  In the book, she asks if she can separate them and Calcifer says that he thinks he'd die if anyone else did it, but he knows she's talked life into things before so, if anyone could do it, she could.  And she outright says "Have another thousand years" before pinching them apart so Calcifer will survive.

Jezebel: So the scarecrow’s not a prince in the book?

Wench: I don’t think so.  The scarecrow and the prince are two separate entities, and the prince has a far more gruesome fate.  I don’t fully remember enough to say more, but I’m pretty sure they’re separate.  She talks them both to life, though, so in that sense, it kinda works.

Jezebel: Ooooop! Well damn! I see!  Oh, and, as for endpoint… Ummmmm I have forgotten how to endpoint.  Halp!

Wench: Give thoughts.  Did you like it?

Jezebel: Ummm I LOVED it.   It was so gooooood!

Wench: Aight… Elaborate on that :) 

Jezebel: And cute and confusing sometimes but also sad and then happy.  Also why was he a bird man?  I think I missed that part

Wench: It was just one of his spells.  It helped him fight the largely air-based battle.  But it was an anthropomorphic spell, and he ran the risk of not recalling how to switch back each time he did it

Jezebel: Ohhhhh.  Ummmm… Did it ever explain Sophie’s cure being broken or was it ever broken?

Wench: Ah, right, so… complicated.  First off: the Witch's deal with the demon thing was basicallyyyyy that she got the power to cast curses but couldn't uncurse them.  Or at least, I think that's it, and that's how I've interpreted it.  So she couldn't change Sophie back.  I thinkkk, in large part, Sophie was eventually talking herself into the curse.  Like I said --- and as she's shown in the movie --- she's very doubtful and not-confident throughout the story… And she also had this magical power that let her control reality, within reason.  So, basically, she was expecting herself to be an old woman, and thus she was.  That's why she was young whenever she wasn't consciously focused on the fact that "oh, yeah, I'm old" (e.g. while she was asleep, when she'd woken up but was more focused on what was going on with Howl and his nest than what he was doing, etc).  And whenever she feels more confident/less like she's not worth much, the spell wanes further.  So, whenever the Markl calls her "family," whenever she's dwelling on love for Howl, etc.  And then, at the end, she's still got the silver hair because technically she's still cursed (or, at least, that's how I interpret it), but she's confident in who she is/where she's going/who she's with, so she's perpetually talking herself out of the curse.

Jezebel: Ahhh! Ok that makes sense! I was like…. Have they forgotten ma’am is cursed ☠️🤣

Wench: Also, bit of fun fact, parallel, etc…  Howl tells her, at the end, that her hair is like starlight.  And Calcifer was a falling star who was holding custody of his heart.  So Sophie at the end of the movie is the new bearer of his heart  😭

Jezebel: 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 Awwwwww

Wench: I love this movie alskdjflkasjfd

Jezebel: It is veryyyyy goooood

Wench: Any more to say for endpoint?

Jezebel: Honestly not that I can think of! But I did love it!! 💕💕💕💕😭😭😭

Wench: Aight... what's next on our react schedule, you think?

Jezebel: Hmmmmm 🤷🏻‍♀️ 🤣🤣

Wench: Bitch, I just sent the excel!  You don’t pick one, I will.  And you likely won’t like it.

Jezebel: 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 Ummmmm… DA?

Wench: Aight, folks, you heard her!  ‘Til then!

#howl's moving castle #howls moving castle #hmc #hmc movie #hmc book #(but less so) #sophie hatter #howl pendragon #howl jenkins pendragon #calcifer #markl hmc #reactions #movie reactions #jezebel (pr)

[hoekkage]

#iss not bad i guess 🤔 #ae #mb #🥖.txt