#like spreading the news on april fools is so unnecessary | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

oiboibabyboy · 1 month

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I hate to be the person bringing this up

HOWEVER

And let me put a disclaimer here first actually: I’m happy for shourtney if they are and have been a couple this entire time

but wHAT WAS THE REASON????

What was the reason for hiding the relationship this whole time? Why not share the news when they got engaged? Why not before that even?

Why did courtney say all that about not dating a co-worker? WHY DID THEY HIDE ITTT?? Like they don’t owe us their entire relationship but i dont get why they wouldnt just say “yeah we’re together but dont wanna be public about it” and just set a boundary. Why would they instead let the fandom run loose with it and cause chaos? Like them being a couple or not has been the divider of the fandom FOR YEARS!

The shourtney compilations™️ speak for thenselves with people calling each other out for shipping real-life people, for hating on others, for not respecting boundaries, for not just letting people have fun, and just about everything else. Ive been so exhausted by the discourse surrounding this subject that I’ve actively distanced myself from the fandom outside of a few youtube channels.

And I’ve never been a shourtney shipper bc i just dont see it, so its perhaps just a me-problem but wtf… wouldn’t we see them be flirtatious on the regular? Like I’m not kidding, I genuinely feel we see more small moments between shayne and angela than shayne and courtney. So if they are legitimately a couple and have been for a wHILE? Why dont they seem like one? As far as I’m aware we haven’t even seen shayne with her cats! Idk i feel like we wouldve seen more so-called ‘proof’ lol

Anyways i don’t mean to spark more drama i just really wanna understand this situation bc it just makes ZERO. FUCKING. SENSE. to me

#also i am a huge smosh fan #none of this is intended maliciously #i just cannot make sense of this entire situation #dont even get me started on making it public on fkn april fools of all fkn days #like they would have their moment regardless #like spreading the news on april fools is so unnecessary #smosh fandom #shourtney #smosh #rant

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amaranth-devi1 · 2 years

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There is a serious question if these people pushing vaccines, like Bill Gates and Klaus Schwab, are oblivious to the danger of creating unnecessary vaccines by mandating the world get vaccinated that will force viruses to mutate. Are they deliberately trying to create a massive crisis in health? Bill Gates brags he is vaccinated and boosted. If that is true, then he could end up being one of the first to go. Now Australia is already reporting that there are new variants emerging that infect people and the vaccines have been circumvented. COVID was NEVER a serious disease. The same group of people who died were typically those who die annually from the flu. But this time, Gates may have created the worse pandemic in history that will be one that cannot be stopped.

Klaus Schwab must be running short on cash. He is holding DAVOS now in the spring rather than January. The rich, famous, and most powerful are invited to return for their annual brainwashing event in Switzerland, following a two-year coronavirus-induced hiatus. But this time, Klaus has demanded they all be vaccinated and tested to attend, suggesting that the vaccine indeed does NOT prevent getting COVID.

I warned back in 2020 that our models on the cycle of disease were showing a target of 2022 – not 2020. It looks like the computer will be correct again. It looks like 2020 was the precursor and the insane mandatory vaccinations of the world have led to the mutation of COVID which can become a real serious threat Bill Gates can be counting all the money he will make from more vaccines, but this fool obviously took the Blue Pill and lives in a fantasy world where vaccines work PROVIDED the same disease does not co-exist in animals.

I have warned that all we need to do is just look at the antibiotics. The overuse of these drugs has led to superbugs evolving that are now incurable. The CDC has even stated that the overuse of antibiotics has led to superbugs. Interestingly, even the World Economic Forum (WEF) report published in 2014 warned that ‘The world will run out of effective antibiotics.” The WEF stated the link between the overuse of antibiotics was causing antibiotic resistance and superbugs in hospitals. This has increased the death rates of many people. The WEF concluded that antibiotic-resistant bacteria posed the greatest risk to human health. Others have noted that bacteria are growing stronger and acquiring resistance to multiple drugs. (Spellberg, Bartlett, & Gilbert, 2013). So my question is WHY did the WEF insist upon 100% vaccination knowing that will subject society to a devastating loss of life long-term? Was this the true goal?

The Spanish flu pandemic of 1918, the deadliest in history, infected an estimated 500 million people worldwide—about one-third of the planet’s population—and killed an estimated 20 million to 50 million victims, including some 675,000 Americans. The 1918 flu was first observed in Europe, the United States, and parts of Asia before swiftly spreading around the world. The first mention of influenza appears in an April 5, 1918, weekly public health report. The report informs officials of 18 severe cases and three deaths in Haskell, Kansas. The target month here in 2022 for the start was also April. We appear to be getting the mutations of COVID along with the sudden spread of Monkey Pox. And BTW, all the studies showed that masks were “USELESS” back then as well.

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cksmart-world · 4 years

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The completely unnecessary news analysis

by Christopher Smart

March 10, 2020

WHY ELIZABETH WARREN LOST

Everyone knows by now our system doesn't necessarily select the most qualified candidate: Exhibit #1 — Donald Trump. So, our political analysts here at Smart Bomb did some numbers and crunched some exit polling snacks after Elizabeth Warren pulled out: Among the things they found was that Warren's sweaters cost her big among among young male voters who said she reminded them of granny. This group said they weren't against a woman president but wanted someone who looked more like Melania. Our analysts also noted that Warren's strongest support came from men and women with Ph.D.s in economics and astrophysics. They liked that Warren had a plan for everything from maternity leave to nuclear submarines. Unfortunately, this group is smaller than the American Bowling Association. Another weak spot for the senator was middle-aged plumbers, who wanted a strong male who would go off half-cocked when provoked. Although Warren outlined a progressive agenda, a large number of men and women in their late 20s and early 30s favored Bernie Sanders because he was grouchier and yelled louder. But in the end, it was suburban housewives who abandoned Warren because she was weak on shoulder rubs and hair touching. They're voting for Biden.

WILBUR ROSS: VIRUS WILL BOOST JOBS

Commerce Secretary Wilbur Ross says the Coronavirus pandemic is yet another opportunity to put America First and make some quick bucks. “The fact is, it does give business yet another thing to consider when they go through their review of their supply chain,” Ross said on Fox News For Real Americans. “So I think it will help to accelerate the return of jobs to North America.” (We are not making this up.) The Coronavirus, is still quite mysterious. If and when it goes away, it may not really go away, according to some epidemiologists. Like influenza (flu), it could come back every fall. Already, entrepreneurial televangelist Jim Bakker is hawking a snake oil cure called the “Silver Solution,” developed by naturopathic doctor Sherri Sellman. It could (or could not) kill the virus in 12 hours. And in Australia, the Darwin-based NT News is doing its part to make up for the panic run on toilet paper by printing extra pages. “Run out of loo paper? The NT News cares,” the front page reads. “That’s why we’ve printed an eight-page special lift-out inside, complete with handy cut lines, for you to use in an emergency.” It's too early to tell whether the virus will benefit free trade. Maybe Trump could slap a tariff on the virus, because if we're gonna die, we should at least make a buck off it.

BLACK WATER KEEPS ON ROLLIN'

Remember that Erik Prince dude, who founded the mercenary outfit Black Water that killed civilians in Iraq. Well that dude — who happens to be Education Secretary Nancy DeVos' brother — never went away. Nope, he just changed the name of his private security firm to Academi, because this Dark Prince didn't want to miss out on the big bucks from the DOD. And after all, who is the Army going to send on illegal black-ops, while retaining deniability. (Dead civilians? We didn't kill no dead civilians.) Well, good ol' Erik has now branched out and hired former British and American spies to infiltrate Democratic congressional campaigns and groups that happen to be on Donald Trump's shit list. These undercover ops are in concert with Project Veritas, the right-wing cabal set up to embarrass mainstream media, Democrats and liberals. Typically, Project Veritas sets up undercover "stings" using false cover stories and covert video in an effort to expose “media bias.” (No surprise, Fox News and Rush Limbaugh aren't on their hit list.) Of course, Trump knows nothing about it. In fact, he barley knows who Erik Prince is. He might have met him once, but, you know, he meets so many people.

IN & OUT AT BYU

LGBT students at Brigham Young University don't know if they're coming or going. Last month, in something of Richter 7 earthquake, the Mormon school updated its “Honor Code” to allow “homosexual behavior.” Like a parting of the waters, LGBT BYU students celebrated: “Free at last, free at last, thank God Almighty, we're free at last.” But then a strange storm swirled in and it rained frogs: The Tower of Power announced the revision did not mean “homosexual behavior” was copasetic, after all. According to BYU officials there was a miscommunication. “Even though we have removed the more prescriptive language, the principles of the Honor Code remain the same.” Well, that clears things up. It's kinda like a bad April Fools prank — just kidding, kids, back in the closet. But then, there was this from the LDS Church-owned Deseret News: “For the first time, BYU will allow same-sex partners to compete in a national dance competition the university is hosting this spring.” Confused? You're not alone. It couldn't be that BYU bigwigs pulled the old Itchy-Switchy on the International Dance Council in order to qualify for the big event, could it? Nah, they would never do something so cynical — would they?

Post Script — Well, holy shit, as they say on Wall Street. Whatever you do, don't look at your IRA or 401-K, you could lose all hope and start thinking your retirement will be spent in a sleeping bag under the viaduct. But as we learned from the Great Recession of 2008, just wait 10 years and things will get back to where they were. OK, almost where they were, unless you're rich, then you'll make a killing. Word from the White House is that things are going very, very,very, well. That means we're going to hell on The Princess of the Seas. The more “verys” Trump uses equates to exactly the opposite — as in, very, very, very, screwed up. Just be glad you're not on a cruise ship or in jail — there's not a lot of difference when it comes to Coronavirus, although inmates don't have balconies. Of course there is some good news: now Trump and leading Republicans admit that Coronavirus is a real thing. Since the outbreak in China last month, it's been a hoax perpetrated by Democrats and Fake News. This is what happens when one of the talking points of the political right go south. They just don't talk about it, like it never existed. Of course, global warming is still a hoax. But someday when the Atlantic laps up on Mar-a-Lago, it will be like Trump and Hannity had warned us all along that Democrats were creating a crisis. But as George W. Bush once said after winning the South Carolina primary thanks to a rumor spread by his campaign that John McCain had fathered a child with a black woman, “It's just politics, John.”

Well, Wilson, with the apocalypse looming and Trump at the helm, what have you and the band got to ready us for the coming shit storm:

I saw a newborn baby with wild wolves all around it / I saw a highway of diamonds with nobody on it / I saw a black branch with blood that kept drippin' / I saw a room full of men with their hammers a-bleedin' / I saw a white ladder all covered with water / I saw ten thousand talkers whose tongues were all broken / I saw guns and sharp swords in the hands of young children / And it's a hard, it's a hard / It's a hard, and it's a hard / It's a hard rain's a-gonna fall...

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danwetzelsports · 7 years

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As this blog has long noted I travel a lot for work. I’ve flown over one million miles on Delta/Northwest and who knows how many more on airlines ranging from Southwest to an operation known as Aeroflot.

I’ve taken domestic flights inside some edge-of-proper-society-places such as China, Russia, South Africa, Brazil and Louisiana. Other than the obvious similarities between our looks, I am not George Clooney from that movie, but I’ve seen a thing or two.

And here is what I know: Not to defend United for dragging that guy off the plane, but generally the biggest problem when it comes to flying is not the airlines but my fellow passengers.

I don’t know all the details and don’t care for all the details but clearly United messed up. If you need seats on a full flight you have to keep raising your bump compensation until someone takes it. That’s the way to deal with this.

But in defense of airlines, we can walk back the rest.

Just briefly: overbooking isn’t a bad thing. It’s a good thing. Good for the airlines who can maximize profits by accounting for the number of people who miss flights, fly stand by earlier or later or cancel at the last moment. And good for passengers because that allows flight prices to remain lower than they otherwise would and gets as many people on a plane (and thus across a day) as possible. Also, you can score some sweet credits if you volunteer.

Airlines are terrible at lots of things. Believe me. I’ve been taken off flights. I’ve been put on flights to unnecessary connecting airports. I’ve been stranded overnight. I’ve had long set plans ruined. It’s brutal.

Ninety-plus percent of the time however I’ve climbed in a tin can in one city/country and landed on time or earlier in another. It’s amazing. Lewis And Clark was two hundred years ago.

The United thing was extreme. Poor work by the airline, but when three cops come and tell you to move out of your seat, you should really move out of your seat. It’s not going to end well and an airline seat is hardly the hill you want to get roughed up on. Go protest something important.

On Wednesday April 5, Delta was dealing with heavy storms and everything was a mess in Augusta, Ga. The little airport was packed with beaten-down travelers. Luckily they called my flight we all boarded the plane. Then we sat on the tarmac for an hour before being told told we all needed to get off.

The entire plane – every passenger – peacefully exited only to have Delta give our plane to another flight. We had to watched a couple hundred other people take our seat. They soon departed for Atlanta instead of us. Our flight never left. Cancelled for good.

It sucked but no police were needed. Everyone listened to the flight attendant.

I appreciated that because it’s usually an idiot passenger causing all the problems, not the stressed-out, under-paid, no-good-option flight attendant or gate agent.

Here are my five worst people on a plane (in no particular order and I’m not even getting to the obvious ones such as belligerent drunks or barking dogs – no dogs should be allowed in the damn main cabin, by the way).

1. Starbucks Lady

It’s a 6:30 a.m. cross-country flight and you felt the need to get a Venti double Frappuccino or whatever that creation is? Not only are you going to spend the first hour of the flight sucking loudly through a straw, but that creation has enough caffeine and sugar to drop a horse. Look lady, no one is asking you to fly the plane. Exactly how alert do you need to be?

You want to know how to make air travel better? Go to sleep. Flight goes faster, you don’t need to be entertained, you can ignore the other passengers and you catch up on some rest (fitful, but whatever). Don’t tell me you can’t sleep on planes between a gargle of Starbucks. You have to have a plan – turn off electronics, read a book, avoid stimulants. It isn’t hard. I feel for like 6-foot-10 guys, but you aren’t that.

Don’t book a window seat, drink a massive coffee and then wonder why you are as fidgety as a kindergartener, unable to sleep and have to get up three times to go to the bathroom – thus bothering the rest of us.

2. Big bag guy

It ain’t going to fit, buddy. Maybe it’s compensating for other parts of their life. Maybe they just really think they are going to get over on the airline for that $25 baggage fee. Whatever it is, that massive roller isn’t getting into the tiny overheard compartment.

These guys are the worst. They push and slam and bitch and moan. The people already seated below them are panicked and jostled. Some properly sized bag is inevitably getting crushed up there.

The guy gets angrier and angrier as he tries to defy the laws of physical space. Soon he’s regaling everyone about that time the airline lost his luggage in Albuquerque – cry me a river, we’re not on your side.

Then the poor flight attendant has to come by and tell him he needs to check it (for free) and he gets mad at them. Everyone’s stress goes up. Look, pay the fee or pack less. It’s simple. How much crap you need for this weekend in Erie?

The baggage fee thing is horrible but they have to do it because all you fools will only pay for the cheapest flight that comes up on Expedia. Then you complain when the flight isn’t luxurious like it supposedly used to in the Mad Men days or something. It’s like someone buying a Chevy Spark and then bitching it isn’t as roomy as a Cadillac Escalade.

3. Idiot/Patriot in the TSA line

You know these people are there to stop us from getting blown up, right? Imperfect system but it’s the best we’ve got.

So, can you please pay attention? September 11 was over a decade and a half ago … the freakin’ laptop has to come out of the bag. Yes, a cell phone is a metal item. And actually I am not surprised that your oversized belt buckle caused the x-ray to ping. It’s not shocking at all.

This isn’t that hard. Follow the stupid rules. You’re slowing up the line because you are a clown.

The only people worse are the ones who believe the TSA is infringing on their Constitutional rights with that there new-fangled body scanner or a pat down or merely existing. What, you think I’m a terrorist? Look, if you’re that into your privacy, then cool. Just find a better way to get the woods of Idaho.

Twitter follower @FakeKevinKugler added a subset to this: the person who was sent to TSA PreCheck but decides to clog everything up by stripping down anyway. You undeservedly reached the promised land and this is how you act? Pay attention.

4. Burrito Bowl Dude

Tight connections and long trips can mean there is limited time to get a meal at the airport. And we know you aren’t getting anything substantive in coach. So people bring food on the plane.

Here’s a tip. Maybe on those days, you just have a protein bar. Or eat right away as you wait for everyone else to board. Not these people. They have to bring an elaborate, often sloppy meal, let it sit in a bag for an hour stinking up the place and then pull it out and try to spread out.

There’s usually some assembly required, some salsa to pour over, some Sriracha or salad dressing. Then a knife and fork come out. You need the dexterity of Houdini to eat this thing in such a small space so rice or lettuce is inevitably flying everywhere and chicken is spilling and it’s a massive mess.

You’re bothering me now. I don’t care if it’s good.

5. Drink Cart Enthusiast

They need to get rid of the drink cart on all flights under like two hours. It’s a rolling debacle. If you are so desperate for hydration or a tiny snack then buy your own.

Yet they pull that thing out and people act like dogs that just saw their master walk in with the treat jar. You’ve never had a Diet Coke before? A package of five to six pretzels? I have had people wake me up to let me know the drink cart is here so I wouldn’t miss out.

The drink cart blocks the aisle, slams knees and elbows and generally only gives the customers something else to bitch about because they didn’t get the whole can or found the peanuts an unsatisfying meal. You know, back in the day they used to carve up steak. Yeah, well, back in the day flights cost a thousand bucks and planes crashed all the time.

I once had a 37-minute flight to Indianapolis delayed for 1:45 because “catering” needed to restock the drink cart. That means we could have flown to Indy, deplaned, slammed a beer at the airport bar, reboarded and returned.

BONUS: 5A Delusions of Grandeur Guy in 38B

Many Twitter followers mentioned this one. You’re way in the back of the plane yet somehow believe once the plane arrives at its destination and pulls up to the skybridge that you’ll somehow beat the crowd and race off the plane first. I get the desperation to make a connecting flight, but it isn’t happening. Usain Bolt couldn’t charge the aisle fast enough to make it. Accept reality and wait your turn.

BONUS: 5B Boarding Group ZZ Gate Blockers

More Twitter recommendations. They have a process to get on the plane. The Diamond Medallion and First Class people go first. Deal with it. If you find yourself in Group 7 or whatever, get the hell out of the way. Standing in front of the little ropes that lead to the ticket scanning machine when you aren’t getting on for the next 20 minutes assures only one thing, it will take even longer to get on.

This is a partial list. In summary, as much as I sometimes hate airline bureaucracy, I hate you people even more.

And don’t lean your seat back.

#terriblepeople

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